-Mani-
My phone ringing woke me up the following day. It was Lynn calling me. Hello, I said, sounding like every bit of a 56-year-old man.
"Damn, you were asleep; imma call you back," she replied.
"Nah, you're good." I got to get up anyway. What's up?
Let me tell you what happened when I got back. That after-party was Lit, but Dre's pregnant baby momma got in there somehow, and Her and the chic he was with started fighting. Just like with me, she started swinging on that girl for nothing. Dre carried her out; that was the last time I saw him until he returned a lil bit later. By then, ole girl was gone. She said hell no to the baby momma drama as well.
"Dang, I missed all the good stuff," I laughed.
"hell yea."What about you? What did you do after I dropped yall off?"
"I was on the phone with B all night," I whispered. It turns out he kept calling me from those private numbers.
"Girl, why yo ass insists on playing with Rome's crazy ass."
"B, my friend, I said with the biggest smile plastered on my face.
"Friends "Play" with friends now, she said."
"I could feel her sarcastic tone beaming through the phone. Imma blame you. The liquor/ weed combo had my body feening for some form of penetration. I definitely wouldn't have stopped B this time. She was laughing her ass off."
Well, what about Rome?"
"I am trying to figure out what imma do about Rome."
The walls in that club were thin as hell; we heard yo ass girl, mainly when the DJ changed the song. The one second of silence revealed that y'all were cutting up in that room. Girl, I said, blushing super hard. I'm not going to ever forget last night. It was really double the fun.
So what are you going to do about this lil triangle you have gotten yourself in?
I don't know. I think Rome still is in love with that bitch, and now he's acting like he's not since her dad shot him. If her dad hadn't shot him, he wouldn't even be sweating me. He gets extremely jealous when it comes to me because he believes since he doesn't want me, no one else should. The real question is, if you were in my position, what would you do?
Honestly, I don't know what I would do if I were in your position. I'm the wrong person to be asking for advice, but I'm always going to be here if you need someone to talk to
Okay, imma, let it all out to you, therapist Lynn. I still love Rome, stupid, I know, but it's a lingering feeling that doesn't want to go away. I want him to be the one for me but I also can't forgive him. Last night just confirmed that. But Brandon treats me the way I want Rome to. He's caring and sweet, not to mention we have so many things in common. I moved over a bit and felt something shift in the bed beside me. I looked over, and Rome was sleeping. I didn't even know he crept into my room. I hopped up fast as hell and walked out to the living area, hoping he was asleep and didn't hear what I was saying.
"Rome was the bed with me the whole time."
"What! You think he heard you?
"I don't even know, but I hope not."
Well, what happened after you left last night? I asked Lynn so we could change the subject. I went home with my baller friend last night; he is here now. He had been trying to get some of me for years, so I decided to let him taste the kitty. He doesn't even know, but Im bout to fuck his whole world up, fuck Dre.
"Girl, are you sure you want to do that?"
Hell yea, I'm not running behind, no nigga. I'm not stuck up in any way, but I won't act like I don't know how bad I am. I could have any nigga I want eating out my hand.
I wished I had just an ounce of Lynn's confidence. That's no shade to you because you married me, on the other hand. There is no ring on my finger, so until then, imma do what I want. Imma leave you with this nugget since I have to go and cook him breakfast. What you may want might be different from what's best for you. I would tell you to follow your heart, but unfortunately, our hearts ain't shit.
After hanging up the phone with Lynn, I got up and handled my daily hygiene. The mood I was in was reflected from the night before. I was so happy and calm that there wasn't anything anyone could do to piss me off. After turning on my apple playlist low, I began cooking grits, eggs, sausages, and buttermilk biscuits. Tink's "new nigga" was playing through my phone's speakers. Loud whining sounds coming from my room interrupted my vibe. Prince was woke; I didn't want to miss any more hours without him. So I stopped by my mom last night and got him. I walked in, picked him up, changed his diaper, and brought him to the kitchen. I was so hungry I felt like I hadn't eaten in days. Soon as I was starting to eat, Rome came out of my room with nothing but boxers on and walked over to us.
Where my plate? He asked. I grabbed another plate from the cabinet and made him a significant amount of food. I think I went overboard. We sat at the table like a family for the first time since I arrived. We ate in silence. I didn't want to talk about last night, nor did he. He finished eating, got up, and walked to his room. I got up and got dressed today. I decided to wear these acid-washed ripped jeans, an all-white long-sleeve off-the-shoulder top, and my red, black, and white retro 7's. Lynn helped me upgrade my whole wardrobe, and we lit a fire on all my old clothes in case I got anxiety and wanted to return to wearing them.
I grabbed Prince and was about to walk out the door but was stopped by the banging on the door; it scared me. It was so loud it sounded like the police were out there. I started walking up the stair to Rome's room, but he was coming down. Stand at the top of the stairs, and if anything pops off, run into my room and lock the door. I got a gun under my bed in a Jordan shoe box. No matter what happens, remember to aim and shoot, he directed.
Who the fuck is it? He shouted at the top of his. Open this muthafucking door, my father-in-law hollered. He unlocked the door; what's up, pops. Before he could even get anything out, his dad punched him in the chest. He was pissed. What the fuck was that for? When were you gonna tell me? He asked Rome. Tell you what Rome said angrily. When were you gonna tell me B killed him and you kidnapped him? This is still my shit how the fuck you thought that was going to get that past me.
Wait, b killed who? Inquiring minds wanted to know. I was so confused about what happened and what was going on.
I've been told you cut B off Rome, but you hardheaded ass didn't listen. What were you thinking? Not here, Rome said; let's not discuss this in front of my wife, he said, turning around and pointing in my direction. I walked down the stairs and spoke to my father-in-law. Because of everything that happened, I didn't expect him to speak back to me, so I was shocked when he did. I was about to walk out the door, but Rome grabbed my hand, stopping me in my tracks. Where are you going dress like that and since when have you started wearing those types of clothes?
Deal with that shit later, Rome, my In-law, barked, saving me, and allowing me to walk out the door.
B killed some was replaying over and over in my head. Who did he kill, and why. Hell, were they even talking about the same B? Stop being stupid, Mani of course; they talking about the same B, my inner thoughts expressed. Prince started crying in his car seat, and I was 10 mins away from my parent's house to drop him off for the week. I hated having to keep doing this. I still haven't heard back from his social worker regarding the house inspection, and I was becoming impatient. The light turned red, causing me to slam on the brakes slightly.
My mind was elsewhere when I needed to focus while my son was in the car. I put Gracie's Corner on youtube and sat my phone in his lap. He stopped crying immediately. He loved him some of Gracie's corner. Pulling into my parent's driveway made me teary-eyed. I would have to spend another week without the love of my life. My mother came out of the house after hearing the car horn. While waiting for her to come, I got out and started to gather all his things. She finally made her way out to me after taking her precious time. Aww maw-maw missed her baby she said as she grabbed Prince and his diaper bag. I kissed him before she walked off and went inside. It was a lil chilly out, so the last thing I wanted was for him to get sick. Before putting my car in drive, my text notification went off.
"What up, juicy, what you getting into."
"Lawd, don't call me that."
"What you want me to call you then, Tasty?"
"Lol, you are a mess. Mani is fine."
"Nah, juicy yo new name, but what are you getting into today?"
"Nothing; I just dropped Prince off and was about to go home."
"Why go back home when you can come chill with me?"
"My body started heating up; reminiscing about the dance floor made me flustered. "Chill with you where B?"
"Here, imma send you this address, and don't make me come find you."
Did I want to continue doing this? Rome crossed my mind, not for Rome's sake, though, for B's. After the beating he took last time, I concluded that since Rome wouldn't get physical with me, He would take it all out on him.
"You coming? Tell me now because I don't want to be sittin' there just waiting."
I thought for a second and said fuck it. Rome never put me first, so I will. "Yea, imma come."
I pulled up to the address B sent me, and it was an outdoor theater. I was surprised because I thought these things only rolled at night. He rolled his window down, then directed me to the spot next to his car. I got out of my car and walked to his.
"Here, hop in, juicy."
"I just shook my head."
I hopped in the passager seat, and the different aromas hit my nostrils, causing my stomach to growl. There were popcorn, candy, nachos, and all type of stuff. It was cute, like a car picnic, and I couldn't wait to dive in. It was awkwardly silent, I wanted to ask him about what Rome and my Father-In-Law were talking about, but I was too scared, so I decided not to mention it.
"What movie are we watching?"
"Imma be watching you."
I squeezed my legs together; it was getting a little hot down there, and I was fighting with all might not smile. "You so silly,"
"Nah, but I hope you didn't see this shit yet. It's a horror movie called come play. ."
I hadn't seen the movie, but I was a big fan of horror too, and something so simple as that solidified what I had been feeling all along. That me and B were a better match than Rome and I would ever be. The movie started, and my eyes were fixated on the screen. I could feel b burning a damn hole through the side of my face. His hand reached my thigh, and he gently began massaging it. You don't mind. Cause I don't make you uncomfortable, he said. No, I don't mind.
"I miss you, yea Mani."
"I missed you too and wanted to apologize for last time."
"For what? You ain't do nothing but go with yo move. I didn't think Rome would get that mad, but it's cool; it's water under the bridge."
We continued to watch the movie, and it was coming to a end. B's hand was resting on my thigh, and he was eating popcorn with the other. I was enjoying myself, but my foolish mind kept being enthralled with thoughts of him, Rome. Why couldn't it be B? Why do I still want to be with Rome after all he put me through? Was it love or the fact that he was the first man I had ever been with? I push those thoughts to the back of my brain once I heard B asking me am I alright. I nodded.
My phone started to ring with his unique ringtone. I knew it was Rome.
"Hello," I picked up, and I could see B mean mugging out of my peripheral.
"Yea, where are you at?
"I'm on my way home now."
I felt the tightening of B's grip on my thigh. It wasn't tight enough to hurt me but tight enough to let me know he disapproved of me talking to Rome.
"You with Lynn?"
"Yea, I went to catch a movie with Lynn."
"Okay, I had to go take care of some business but imma be home in an hour or so, imma see you then.
"Okay, I hung up."
I'm sorry, I have to go. I didn't think he would call looking for me.
"It's iight. Next time though, let your phone ring. When you are with me, Rome needs to become irrelevant instantly, iight.
I nodded and got out of his car, and so did he. "Damn, a nigga can't get a hug."
I walked up to him and wrapped my arm around his neck. He wrapped his arms around my waist and cupped my butt. Slapping it a few times. He started taking my scent in and kissing me on the neck, getting me hot and bothered for nothing.
I wanted to taste you again. Your taste is still lingering on my tongue, sexy ass. It's cool, though. We can take a rain check, he said.
He released me from his embrace and walked me to the driver's seat. I got in and rolled down the window to let him know I had fun and would see him again later. He leaned into my car and kissed me on the forehead.
Cya later juicy, but next time we meet come with a skirt and no drawls so I can taste you fareal.
Thoughts?