Chapter 55
Since I knew Josh had to have gone eat dinner at his parents' house yesterday because it was Thanksgiving, I decided to drop by his place around noon.
I was sure he would be grateful I let him sleep in.
But once I got to his house, I realized I really should have dropped by sooner, because it looked like someone had broken and entered in his apartment and thrown everything around.
It was a complete mess.
"Josh?" I called out.
His head popped up from behind a pile of big plastic boxes.
"Oh, hey, Blake," Josh said, looking off.
I frowned. "What's going on? Is everything alright?"
Josh started to pace around, moving stuff, "Yes! I decided I wanted to rearrange the living room, but then when I started to move things, I realized I should probably clean my floors properly, and to do that I need to put good music and I realized I should be reorganizing my vinyl collection, but that means I need to tidy up my book library too, and CHRISTMAS DECORATONS! I need to put them up, but it's in these boxes at the back of one of my wardrobes and I need to—"
I interrupted him because it felt like he wasn't going to stop. "Josh, are you okay?"
"Okay? I'm perfect!"
"How bad was Thanksgiving?" I asked him gently, getting a little worried here.
Josh snorted. "Now, why would Thanksgiving be bad? It wouldn't be like my father could start belittling me the second I walked into the house, and then it's not like I could eventually snap at him, and it's not like he could literally throw a picture frame at me, and that picture frame would be of me and my actual mom? Right, that shit doesn't happen?"
"Your father threw a picture frame at you?" I asked.
Josh's father was often psychologically abusive, but he'd never been physically abusive so far. This was really bad.
"Barely managed to dodged it too. He was aiming straight to my face."
"Jesus Christ," I mumbled, running a hand through my hair.
What was I supposed to do here?
"So, if we could all never refer to me as a Torres for the rest of my fucking life, I'd be real fucking grateful," Josh said, and then let out and exhausted sigh and sat on the floor while Miss Puss popped from a cardboard box and went to sit on his lap.
"Stop going to his house for holidays. Just come with us," I told him. It should have been like this sooner, actually.
Josh just stared at his cat, patting her. "It's fine. Anyway, you guys were going to the Graysons."
"And you should have come with us," I pressed.
It would have been fine if he was there. No one would have questioned it. It was part of my family.
"It's fine."
"No Josh, it's not fine," I told him.
"It just fucking sucks," Josh said, finally looking up at me, "because my sister and step mom aren't bad people. I don't want to cut them out of my life. But as long as... as long as my fucking sperm donor is still in the picture, I don't think... I don't think I can do this anymore," he trailed, fighting off the emotions, sounding so vulnerable suddenly.
And I couldn't just let him like this, so I couched down beside him and I hugged my brother.
He hugged me back, and I could feel him fighting off tears.
"Did you even sleep?" I asked him, still hugging him.
Josh snorted a humorless laugh. "Dude, I didn't even eat."
"What?" I said, letting go of him to look at his face.
"We just argued. I didn't even have time to eat. Which fucking sucks. The only reason why I went was to eat my mom's food."
"Do you want me to go to their house and demand leftovers for you?"
Josh shook his head. "I want you to find a job for the old bastard that sends him across the world, far away from me, for a very long time, but where no one can follow him, so I can actually go home without being abused."
"Let's start by getting you something to eat," I replied, getting up on my feet.
Josh looked at me with a raised eyebrow, perplexed. "You gonna cook?"
"Sure!"
"Fuuuuck that. Let's go," Josh said, getting up too, and headed for his front door.
"Where?" I asked, following him.
"To the one that keeps getting away."
"What?"
"Pretty sure Fred works today," Josh explained.
"You're such a weirdo," I said, and then added right after so he wouldn't feel bad, "I do mean this in the best way possible."
"Thanks. Now go, go," he said, making whooshing motions with his hands, "you're driving Miss Daisie."
"Alright."
So we left his mess, and headed for my car.
This was good, right? This was okay? Sure, this was partly ignoring the problems, but there was nothing else to be done anyway. And right now, Josh needed to eat. And sleep. And be adopted by my parents.
Once we were sitting, and I was driving away, Josh mumbled a feeble, "God, I'm tired," and closed his eyes, quiet for the rest of the ride.
Once I parked, he still had his eyes closed and I wasn't sure if he was sleeping, and if I should leave him alone, or wake him,
This felt weird, because I rarely walked on eggshells around Josh.
Suddenly, he opened his eyes, taking a sharp breath and I didn't have to think about it more.
We headed to fast-food joint, walking side by side in silence, which was kind of insane, knowing Josh, and found Fred at the counter, taking orders.
"Fred, babyboo," Josh greeted him, acting like everything was fine.
Fred rolled his eyes, unaffected. "Take him away, I have work," he said to me.
"Keep pushing, I'll keep pulling," Josh replied.
"Ignore him. He's sleep deprived and hungry," I told Fred. I tried to give him a look, like Josh needed support right now, but I was pretty sure I just looked a little deranged.
"Very hungry," Josh agreed.
"Thanksgiving sucked, as always?" Fred asked him. He caught on. I was grateful.
"I prefer when you push me away and I keep pulling. None of that compassionate shit," Josh said.
No one was waiting behind us to order, so this was fine.
"Does he need a hug?" Fred asked me.
"I already gave him one," I replied.
Josh gasped, pressing a hand over his mouth. "Is Fred offering me a hug?"
"No, no," Fred shook his head, "I just asked you if you needed one. I never volunteered."
Josh pouted. "Bummer."
"I know a certain Beatles fan's number though," Fred said with a teasing grin.
"Do not call the thieving vixen." Josh said, with narrowed eyes.
"Still hasn't given you your clothes back?" I asked, trying to distract him a bit.
Josh wasn't having it. "I'm ignoring this conversation and going to wait for my food over there."
And with that, he just headed to an empty table.
"Should I go on a break?" Fred asked me, once Josh was far away.
I shrugged. "No, it's okay, he just needs to eat and sleep for now. We'll do more damaged control later, when he's more coherent."
"His dad is an asshole," Fred just stated. He knew.
"Yep," I nodded in agreement.
Fred handed me the terminal and I paid for our food. "I'll come and drop off your food when it's ready."
"Thanks."
After that, I went and sat across from Josh.
He had his arms sprawled on the table and his cheek pressed against it.
"When do you think Fred is going to elope with me?" he mumbled, his speech impaired by the squished cheek.
"When you start playing hard to get," I replied, playing along.
"Can't do that. Can't act like I could resist his charm," my best friend replied a little incoherently.
"You're slurring your words. You really need to sleep," I pointed out.
"I put all of my bedsheets in the washer. Forgot to dry them."
I snorted. "All of them?"
"I was having a moment, okay? I wanted to wash them and iron them?
I left out an amused snort. "Why?"
"Why not?"
I shook my head, but smiled at him reassuringly. "I'll bring you back to my house after this."
"Fine."
Fred arrived a minute later, dropping our tray with the usual. "Here you go."
"If I play hard to get, will you elope with me," Josh asked, lifting his head from the table.
"Sure, but you'd never be able to play hard to get with me. You can't resist my charm," Fred replied with a grin.
"See, this is why I love Fred. He knows me," Josh told me, pointing to Fred with his thumb, before grabbing his burger.
"Eat your food and go to sleep," Fred told him, rolling his eyes.
Josh nodded. "So, I can dream about you. I get what you're saying."
Fred just rolled his eyes, ignoring him, and went back to work.
Josh started to eat his burger in silence. I could see tears kind of forming in his eyes.
He was joking around, but of course he wasn't alright.
I felt helpless. I didn't know what to do more.
And I hated it.
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Happy Monday my little Pumpkins! <3
So, this is the first time I try to programming a future update feature on Wattpad. Hopefully you got this chapter, and I didn't have to upload it later, because it never worked. XD
I'm scheduling the upload because I'm going to my last FEQ show tonight. We're going to see Fletcher, if there is no thunderstorms. It's raining though, which sucks. :') Anyway. I have no idea when I'll get back home. And I'm leaving my computer at work, so yeah. As a precaution, because I want to upload on time, I'm scheduling.
I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I do want to put a little bit more of Josh's issues, because it's context for Weird and Weirder in future chapters. I know I say this all the time, but I'm working on a uploading schedule for August that I'll be able to follow through. Also, my Wattpad birthday is in August, and I'm planning stuff too. If I repeat it enough time, it should work, right? XD
Alright. I'm gonna go back to do some writing now. Instead of working. Woooohoooo. ;P
Love you guys! See you all next week! <3