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The soldiers made way for Terra like that old Red Sea tale. The girl entered the Commander's Hall with a bearing worthy of the Queen of the Forest. Two wolves, the ligeress and the fox behind her, following in her wake and leaving a trail of dry mouths from others around.
"I heard the Skaikru was ready," Coriane said once she found herself in front of the Commander's throne.
"That's right. We let him escape at night," the other woman replied with a slight nod. "We owe this success to you, Terra, you were a great help," Lexa rose from her throne, and gracefully descended the steps to stand in front of the chestnut. "I'm sorry about your wolf."
Just for a second she felt the bile in her throat and the burning in her eyes, just for a second before she recovered and made sure that no one could see that small lapse of pain across her face. Anouk had resisted as long as he could, but in the end, neither Nyko nor Odeya could do anything for him. The wolf died in her arms, while Coriane sang to him and stroked his fur, surrounded by his pack. Coriane hadn't dared to cry since his body was burned, let alone now.
"Skaikru will be sorry too. I'll make sure of that."
Lexa smiled sideways and nodded at the woman's words, then returned to her throne.
"I will send Anya's army tomorrow at sunset, I would be honored if Skaiheda would join the battle."
Before Coriane could respond, a faint, but at the same time, loud whisper invaded her head in an annoying and slightly painful manner.
"It's not your time."
She squeezed her eyes tightly shut and brought a hand to her head, there were few times the spirits spoke to her, and having her abilities not so well developed yet, every time they did, it meant great pain. Spirits were divine beings, their power could fry the human mind in a matter of seconds, with a whisper even simpler than the one she had just experienced, that was why the Elementa were the only ones capable of opening their minds to such power, and even if it hurt, she felt the power running from the tips of her toes to her head.
Aren, who as always, had been following in her footsteps from behind, hurried to her side and made sure that the girl was not going to faint, for on one of the few previous occasions when she had had "communication" with the spirits, the power had been too strong and she had fallen unconscious.
Coriane hurried to pull herself together and reassure the man that she was fine. She felt a thick liquid run down her nostrils, and as it reached the edge of her mouth, she tasted the tang of blood. Coriane wiped the black stream with her shirt sleeve and took a deep breath to look at the Commander.
"I've had enough of Terra's participation in this battle, Heda, so I'm going to have to decline your offer."
Lexa nodded, knowing full well that if the spirits didn't want Coriane on the battlefield, there was nothing she could do.
"Will you stay in Polis?" The Commander asked, a little hopeful that the answer would be positive.
Coriane looked at Aren for a few seconds, the boy raised his shoulders discreetly, expressing that he didn't mind spending the night at the citadel. She looked back at the Commander and nodded slightly.
"Excellent, I'll have your rooms prepared," Lexa rose from the throne and descended to then leave the room, accompanied by her flamekeepers.
"Do you need a handkerchief, Terra?" A familiar voice spoke from behind the girl's back.
Coriane and Aren turned almost at the same time to see who was speaking, and their expressions turned grim and serious almost instantly.
"Have a little more respect, Isaac," Aren snapped at him through gritted teeth.
"I thought I was being respectful enough," the blond used the most condescending and incredulous tone possible, warming the blood of both.
"Don't waste your time, Aren, come on," after taking a deep breath, she decided to leave the room before Aren, or she herself, threw a punch or two at the man.
Aren followed her a little reluctantly, and when they were both about to leave, the boy spoke again.
"Your worlds are colliding, Coriane. And the great question is, will you be able to deal with both?"
She clenched her fist hard, so hard that her fingernails dug into her skin, causing injury.
This time, it was Aren who took control of the situation, reaching out a hand to wrap it around the woman's fist, which had already turned white, and giving her a little push to get her out of the place once and for all.
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Coriane and Aren had been out on the training field a couple of minutes ago to hang out, most of the time Coriane had spent making fun of his shooting, the other, they were taking it to teach him how to improve it. It was amazing how the boy could be a perfect marksman when it came to knives and spears, but with the bow he couldn't even hit a huge still target.
"I can't believe you did that," the voice of a very angry Lincoln interrupted their target practice.
Coriane turned to look at her brother with a confused expression, lowered the bow and handed it to Aren to approach Lincoln.
"What are you talking about?"
"What do you think, Coriane?" He spat, rather annoyed.
Something clicked in her head and she immediately understood the cause of her brother's anger. But she took it lightly, her duty was her duty, and Lincoln, as much in love as he was, had to understand that.
"Oh, the poison. To be precise, I didn't do it, I just lent an animal or two," she lifted her shoulders, downplaying the matter.
"Are you seriously taking this lightly? You're killing innocent people, Coriane."
"Wow, wow, wow. Hold it right there. First of all, the poison isn't going to kill them, it's simply to weaken them. Well, yes, maybe one or two with a weak immune system will die, but that's not my problem anymore. And second of all, they are not innocent. Just because your girlfriend is one of them doesn't mean I can ignore what they've done," aligning herself with her brother's seriousness, Coriane looked Lincoln in the eye.
"Ann, I understand that you're angry about Anouk..."
"No, Lincoln, it's not just about him. What about the village they attacked? Or maybe about what they did in their supposed attempt at "negotiation"?"
"That was an accident," Lincoln defended with a sigh.
"Oh, in that case, my collaboration in this was also an accident. Too bad, shall we move on?" She tried to turn around to continue her practice, but Lincoln stopped her by speaking again.
"Ann!"
"What?!" She spat, losing her patience a little.
"Tell me that at least there is a cure for those who can't stand the poison."
Coriane did not answer and instead lowered her head, giving Lincoln all the answers he needed. The man sighed deeply and turned away from his sister quickly.
"Lin...! Agh..." She sighed wearily and rubbed her temples.
"He'll understand, Ann, he knows it's your duty," Aren placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it for comfort.
"Maybe..." She sighed again, wary about how quickly her brother would forgive her.
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The little fight with Lincoln didn't leave her head alone all day, no matter how hard she tried to concentrate on anything else, her brother's angry face, his accusations, all echoed in her head without giving her a break. Aren had assured her endlessly that Lincoln would understand later, when his girl was safe, that Coriane was simply doing her duty to her people, and that it could not be overshadowed by inconveniences of the heart.
But she was not so sure. Her parents had been some of the best warriors Trikru had ever had, but their greatest weakness had always been their sensitivity and inordinate kindness which, at one point in their lives, had led to their deaths. Lincoln had lived longer with them, they had more time to teach him how to fight and forgive, Coriane did not have that same privilege; her parents died when she was just a child, and in her world, being alone was a synonym of having to learn to survive by tooth and claw, she stopped being a child at 10, and at 15 she became Terra, she did not have much time to learn compassion and benevolence.
On the way back to Tondc she asked Aren to go ahead, she needed some time alone to think about everything and clear her mind. She asked him to take Nix with him and, in the company of Astrid and Pax alone, Coriane walked to the nearest cliff and sat on the shore to admire the sunset.
"If only you could give me more clues as to what I should do..." She spoke into nothingness, hoping the forest spirit was listening.
She would never doubt Tekara or any other spirit, Coriane had sworn to dedicate her life to them and that would be an oath she would forever keep, but that didn't mean she didn't doubt herself. If, at the end of the day, she would be able to deal with it all. Most of the time, she felt that the answer was 'no', and that the weight of everything around her would end up crushing her sooner or later.
"Just... tell me what to do, please."
She sat on the edge of that cliff waiting for an answer, a murmur that never came, her eyes closed for fear of opening them and being disappointed. But just as her heart was about to compress so tightly in her chest as to ache, the forest warned of an intruder's arrival.
Coriane opened her eyes immediately and jumped to her feet. Astrid grabbed Pax in her teeth and pulled him behind her before returning to her Terra, the feline and the human waited patiently and ready to pounce, when curly hair and a tall figure came into view.
Astrid snarled and lunged at the man, catching him so off guard that with a gasp, he fell to the ground. Coriane approached them to take a closer look at the boy, finding, to her surprise, the Skaikru that always seemed to be in her way.
"What are you doing here?"
Bellamy looked at her with eyes full of dread before returning his gaze to the large feline on top of him. He looked, apart from obviously frightened; exhausted. Coriane could see the effects of the poison up close once more: his skin paler, his dark circles more prominent, exhaustion consuming his every movement.
"Can you please... take your animal off me?"
"It's ok baby, come."
The ligeress needed no more to stop her soft growls and leave the human alone, returning with Pax to a safe distance where she could attack again if necessary.
"Thank you."
"What are you doing here?" Coriane asked again, more harshly than the first time.
"I was looking for you."
A moment of silence passed before Coriane blinked and realized that the boy was not joking. Quite confused, she raised an eyebrow and folded her arms.
"Looking for me for what, if I may ask."
"Because I need to know what the hell it is you want with us," ignoring the threat of a huge predator at her back, Bellamy advanced towards her with an expression full of confusion and anger, his breath ragged with exhaustion and the effort the poison was making his body overdo.
"Really, I'd love to know what you're talking about, but I have no idea."
"Lincoln told Octavia; that you were the one who created the poison to kill us, that you helped your commander to try to extinguish us. But still, you helped Atom, you didn't kill me that day when I tried to attack you, and then you saved me again the other night. You had more than one chance to kill me and you didn't do it. Your relationship with animals is incredibly strange but something tells me you could use it to finish the job faster than any army, and you haven't done that either. So tell me, Coriane, what. the hell. it's. what you want," she had no idea at what point they'd gotten so close that she could now clearly see the freckles on the boy's face.
A small sting hit her in the chest when she heard her brother's name. Lincoln had told them her name, he was fraternizing with the enemy closer than Coriane had imagined.
She gritted her teeth just as Bellamy was also doing, controlling as best she could every little impulse in her. Astrid and Pax were hanging on by a thread, the two animals waiting for Terra to give them permission to make the slightest move to bring down the one who dared speak to her in such a manner.
"Be very careful, Bellamy, you have no idea who I am or what I am capable of," she remarked his name, letting him know that she, too, knew who he was. "Tell me, since my brother has shown himself so...kindred, with yours, has he told you nothing more about me? Who I am, and why you should be running in the opposite direction right now?"
"No. Not this time. Your little games of intimidation aren't going to work," the boy remained calm under her piercing gaze, but he took a step back, shaking his head, still looking at her.
"You wouldn't understand. And for that matter; I helped create the poison, I didn't order it, and it wasn't designed to kill, only to weaken."
"Then help me understand!" He shouted, desperate.
"You protect your people, Bellamy kom Skaikru, I protect mine. Don't pretend innocence in a war, because no one is innocent. You say I want to exterminate you, but as soon as we try to listen to you as you demanded, you shoot first."
"That was a..."
"Another survival tip: there is no such thing as an accident, not when lives are at stake. When in command, you have to be prepared to make tough decisions and accept the consequences of your actions. Are you prepared to accept the consequences of yours?"
Again, the boy came so close to her that she had to show a clenched fist to Astrid to stop her from attacking. This time, his face was filled with feelings, but also with a conviction that Coriane rarely saw so strong on a person's face.
"If it is to protect those I love; I will accept all that come."
A moment of silence enveloped them. The last rays of sunlight had already hidden behind the dawn, the forest had sunk into its nocturnal blanket in which only a few animals dared to come out. Neither moved or looked away from the other, Coriane could see how tiredness was increasingly dragging Bellamy down, but the boy would not relent from his position. An unexpectedly sly smile from her surprised both him and herself.
"So, you and I are not so different, after all."
Bellamy didn't respond for a moment, but as he tried to, each word meant less energy in his already drained body.
"I don't..." Before the whole response could be formed, the boy staggered, losing the balance of his own body and no matter how hard he tried to regain it, his legs did not give the necessary support.
Coriane managed to grab his arm before he collapsed completely and helped him lie down on the floor, his head on her legs. She tried to soothe his murmurs of reproach with caresses on his hair and even if he tried to get up or continue arguing with her, his words got tangled up in each other and became pure unintelligible babble.
"It's okay, it's okay. You just need to rest, your strength will come back in a couple of hours, you just need to rest."
"You can't...keep making me think that...you're good, and then..." A small whimper cut off his words.
The boy's eyes were struggling to close, every time Coriane touched his skin and felt the fever, it urged him to close them and rest so that all the discomfort would pass faster. She couldn't help the grimace on her face at the boy's light words, and stroking his hair, she murmured the last thing Bellamy would hear before finally giving in to exhaustion.
"There are no good and bad in war, Bellamy, only victims and executioners. You and I...which one will we be?"
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It had been hours, she didn't know exactly how many, but enough that, in the blink of an eye, dawn had woken her. Before leaving, she made sure Bellamy's fever had broken, and was gone before the man could awaken. The forest was just waking up, and she needed better sleep than a few hours on the ground. Tondc was considerably further than her legs could carry her, so, seeing no other option, she headed for Lincoln's cave.
"Finally you show up, Aren told me you took the night off, I was wondering when you were coming," her brother, as soon as she entered the cave, was already ready for the day, sitting on the edge of his bed with a crumpled sheet of paper in his hands.
Coriane recognized it immediately. It was that stupid letter that her progenitors left for her before sending her to die, and Lincoln had always been so insistent that she read it. A letter from the people who had sent her there, from those who had thrown her away and left her to die.
"I'm not here to argue, Lincoln, I'm here to get some rest. So please, take that thing and burn it like I've always asked you to."
The man got up from the bed and shook his head with a laugh without a hint of humor. Coriane took the opportunity to lie down on the leather bedspread and close her eyes for a moment, until Lincoln's voice forced her to open them again, with a sour tone that he had never addressed to her before, he put the letter on the table and spoke without even looking her in the eyes.
"Fine, as you wish. But just so you know, you may have killed your brother."