JORDI ADKINS
"No effin' way!" Nikki exclaimed expressing her utter shock when I got to lunch with them. The first thing I did was to reveal to them that I'm paired up with Xavier Rockwell for our sex education assignment.
"Ugh, can you fucking believe that I was paired up with him of all people?" I trailed off.
"Did you at least asked Mrs. Harding for a switch?" Jane inquired. Her bag of flour was just sitting idly right beside her food as if it was an actual baby but really, it was just a bag of flour.
I lazily stared at my own food. "I did and she wasn't budging at all."
"Well, that's unfortunate." Nikki chimed in. "You are definitely going to be a punching bag, Jordi." Nikki added and perhaps she's forty percent right about that. I don't think this new Xavier's planning on poking fun at me which was hard to believe but that's what I'm seeing right now. Forty percent's still a huge number if we are going to talk about percentage rate and math shit but Xavier's acting weirdly different.
"I don't think I'll be his punching bag for now." I huffed up sound a bit confident. "He doesn't want to fail this assignment and actually, he's been acting weird lately."
Nikki moved closer to my spot. "How weird? Is it like heartbroken because Michiko broke up with me weird? Or like fuck yeah I'm single weird?"
"I virtually did not understand any of those, Nikki. So, my answer's none of the above. Also, I don't know how but he was really adamant at naming the bag of flour. Like, don't you think that's weird for people like him?"
"I named ours. There's nothing weird with that."
"I named my baby too." Jane butted in. "Her name's Sasha by the way."
"Really, Sasha? That's like an adult woman's name, also, did you just assumed that that bag of flour was a she?"
"I wanted it to be a she, Jordi. And naming it was like part of the process of parenthood. Dwight personally did not give a shit about anything, so I got to name it." Jane replied cheerfully.
"Meh. I'm still pissed that I'm paired up with Xavier."
"Maybe you need to take this opportunity to forge a new relationship with Xavier. Perhaps you change the existing one into something new." Shoving some salad to her mouth, Jane went on. There's that weirdly optimistic Jane that we knew popping up again.
"I'd rather unalive myself, Jane or maybe I should just jump off a cliff or maybe I should just jaywalk so I'd get hit by a truck." I rolled my eyes noting the fact that Xavier made my life shitty for the past year. I'm not open to anything such as forging a new relationship with that asshole.
"Speaking of the ginger devil, maybe I should slap him right now because he's on his way to our table." Poking me by the arm, Nikki's tone went from a loud mouthy one and gradually toned down to a whisper.
My eyes mimicked Nikki's view and she was damn right, Xavier's inching his way towards our table. He was carefully clutching the bag of flour in his hands as if it was an actual baby.
"Oh, lord." I whispered under my breath.
"Hey, hotshot, where the fuck are you heading? This table's already reserved for three badass bitches." Nikki muttered halting Xavier from taking a spot at our table.
"I-I just want to have a conversation with Jordi." Mildly stuttering, Xavier seemed desperate.
Nikki instantly pulled the empty chair and put her foot on top just so Xavier won't feel entitled to sit on it. "I'm quite surprised the you know the word conversation."
Xavier ignored Nikki and tilted his full attention towards me. "Hey, Jordi."
Our eyes met and I'm weirdly afraid of the look that he has but it wasn't because he looked like he wanted to land his fist on my face. I just really felt like he needs to have a conversation with me. I might've have an idea on what's running through that redhead of his but I refuse to entertain him for now. I felt my chest rise and yet I ended up looking away from his stare.
"Nikki, give the guy a chance." Jane uttered which took me by surprise. Is she actually on Xavier's side?
"Shut up, Jane." Nikki was quick at shutting Jane down before eventually refocusing her shield-like badassery towards Xavier. "And you, Xavier fucking Rockwell, you need to scram before I kick your ass."
"He's my partner and we..."
"I said scram!!!"
"Okay, okay, I'm sorry." Xavier muttered almost inaudibly before eventually turning his back and walking away.
Nikki and I shared an understanding look before eventually bursting into laughter.
"Did you just heard that? He said 'okay, okay, I'm sorry' like who was that?" Nikki went on and mimicked Xavier's tone.
"Geez, he's getting weirder and weirder." I added.
"You know that guy's been horrible to you ever since like the dawn of time but that was hella weird." Someone spoke behind me. When I turned around I saw Lala, Michiko's sworn enemy. She's been listening to the conversation for quite a while which was always the case for her.
"What, Xavier?" I trailed off. "Please, you don't need to tell me about that."
"Yeah, my bad. But you know what, Jordi? Maybe in a different universe, he might not be an asshole." Lala flicked her long weave as she asserted her focus on me.
"Geez, are you like one of those people who believe in the multiverse theory?" Nikki butted in.
"Beyond the observable universe, other universes may exist as well. Yep, I do believe in that." Lala went on. "And you might be surprised that in that universe, he's like gay and he's into you."
"Aaah? Is Lala on crack again?" Jane looked confused, we all looked confused, most especially me because I know we did make out in the past.
When the day eventually reeled to an end, I walked passed by the field not really expecting a view. I saw the soccer team having a practice and my eyes went straight to Zacheus. He was exceedingly drenched in sweat and I suppose that ought to be gross but it's bizarrely turning me on. I didn't know I was taking my time watching when Zacheus suddenly kicked the ball that almost hit me.
"Sorry about that Jordi." Zacheus yelled as he began jogging right towards where I was standing. The world seemed to go in a slow motion as the breeze gently brushed through Zach's hair. In my eyes, he was moving pretty much slow as if this was a cheesy romance film of some sort. "Hey, are you alright?"
"Aaah, shit." I shook my head hoping that it would quickly pull me back to reality. "Yeah, I'm fine. T-the ball didn't even hit me."
"Okay, I thought you got hit."
"Nah."
Even this seemingly unreachable hot guy cared for that little thing. I'm not really surprised by that though. Zacheus has been the golden boy of the entire school and I just couldn't help but feel like whoever's going to marry him is probably the luckiest woman in the entire world. I would love to be that woman, however, I'm not a woman to begin with and I should probably stop with my sick crush fantasy. Maybe in another universe, there's a woman version of me and she'd be lucky to get this close to the one and only Zacheus Riley.
I swallowed hard as I watched Zacheus pick the ball up and oh boy, I just saw his biceps. He threw the ball in the air before eventually striking a kick that send the ball back inside the field. The gayest version of me hidden deep inside almost had an orgasm when I saw his thick thighs and toned legs. He's totally the hottest person that I know and though I'm aware that he's going to the gym, seeing those muscles flex naturally was just a delight. He was just about to return to the field when he suddenly turned around.
"Uhm, hey, Jordi." He spat.
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure, what is it?"
"I... I don't mean to sound like homophobic or something but how do I tell if someone's gay?" He continued which made me feel utterly confused and somehow dreamy of him. It was a weird question coming from a straight guy to ask. I tried my best not to think he was going through some kind of gay phase because that's way too good to be true.
"W-what do you mean?"
"I'm really not the type of person who overthinks but my girlfriend's been spending so much time with this guy. She says he's gay but I'm having huge doubts about him."
"Oh boy that's some classic shit right there."
"H-how do I confirm th—"
Right before he could even finish his sentence, Xavier showed up. "Jordi!" He yelled at me.
I was mad pissed. I'm really going to start and explain things to Zacheus and hopefully bring some education about gay culture. But just like how everything goes with my day, Xavier's always there to ruin things.
"I... Let's talk some other time." Zacheus said before eventually going back to the field.
"Hey, can I talk to you for a second?" Xavier asked.
"What? You really have to ruin everything, don't you?" I spat not realizing that I may have essentially revealed to him that I have a crush on Zacheus. I'm just pissed that he just shows up to ruin something about my day.
"Ruin what?" He asked.
"Nothing." I cried. "What do you want from me?"
"We need to talk about Billie."
"Who the fuck's Billie?"
"I-it's our baby bag of flour." He cleared and I almost laughed at how I quickly forgot about the shitty sex ed. assignment.
"Fuck, right. Right." Damn, how fucking stupid am I for forgetting about that. I still have to spend the entire week with him as his co-parent. Talk about a nightmare. A never-ending one.
"We need to discuss about how are we going to divide our time for it." Xavier said sounding a lot like this person who wants to be better. It's really gross to think of him like that.
"Oh, right because we are the parents. Great." I huffed up dosed with a bit of annoyance. The way he said those words made me feel like we're an unhappy couple troubled with infidelity that we have to divide our time to for our kids.
"I can't take Billie home." He spat out.
"Why?"
"I... Mrs. Harding said that we should return the bag safe and sound and I'm afraid that's not going to happen if I take it home with me."
"Okay, fine. I'll take it home. Where is it?"
"I-It's in my locker." Xavier replied and I just can't believe my day hasn't ended like the way I want it to end.
I don't want to think about it but he might just be using this as an excuse to do something weird and possibly confusing towards me.