With the doors grinding to a halt, Thomas was gone.
Alby, Minho, and Thomas would all be spending the night in the Glade.
The Gladers were quiet. I think we were all in shock. No normal glader had entered the Maze since Gally over a year ago.
"Newt?" I asked quietly, unsure what all of this meant.
He didn't say anything, just dropped my hand and addressed the crowd.
"Go eat dinner," He ordered. "It's an early curfew tonight."
Reluctantly, Gladers listened to him. Though I knew none of them wanted to, we had just lost our leader.
"Newt?" I tried again.
This time he turned to me, teeth clenched. "That means you too, Felix."
I was shocked. I wanted to say something more, to maybe help him, but he already turned away. He left me with questions and a cold response I couldn't figure out.
Tears brimmed my eyes but I didn't bother saying anything more. I just turned and ran for the woods. I didn't want him to see me cry.
I made it to the treehouse, climbing up in a frenzy and pulling up the rope ladder behind me. I didn't want to see anyone... especially Newt, not right now.
I didn't know what was gonna happen, and it scared me to death. With Alby probably dead, Newt was going to be leader. And I loved Newt, but I wasn't sure if he could handle that.
And if Minho died as well... all hope might as well be lost.
I tucked my knees into my chest. I just wanted to stop thinking.
"Felix?!" It was a male voice, but wasn't Newts. There was no accent. Looking out the window I saw Jack.
I opened the window, "What do you want?"
"To check on you?" He shrugged. I sighed and sent the ladder down.
After reaching the top, Jack sat down next to me. He pulled a bottle of Gallys liquor out of his backpack and handed it to me.
I took it, but just held it in my hands. I wondered if I wanted to get intoxicated right now...
"The way Newt acted was shitty, I'm sorry."
I sighed, taking a drink of the alcohol anyways. "Yeah. It was."
"They're gonna be okay you know."
"Who?" I took another drink.
"Alby. Minho- the Greenie. Minho's smart and he knows the Maze better than anyone."
I scoffed. Another sip.
"No, really." Jack urged, his expression pressing concern. "I mean it."
Another swig. "Nobody survives the night in the Maze."
"But-"
I cut his bullshit off this time, "Look, I know you want to cheer me up, but I just really want to be alone tonight."
He clenches his teeth but nods. I watch him carefully as he grabbed his bag and descended down the ladder.
After he left I pulled it back up, cutting me off from society once again. Thank god.
I babied the jar of bad decisions as night fell like a blanket over the Glade. And with the night came my exhaustion. I fell asleep soon after that.
If Jack was right, we'd find out soon.
***
That night I dreamed. It wasn't something my subconscious did often but with the alcohol mixed with stress, it was enough to send me over the edge.
I was in a house. It felt familiar but I couldn't pin point where exactly I was. It was only me and an older boy, looked to be maybe five years older, but I couldn't determine his age with confidence. The boy looked like me though, dark skin and darker curled hair. He had a strong jaw and was handsome with a well-muscled build.
His face was filled with worry though.
"Here-" He pushed me into a small room, a closet. "Stay here, little brother, they're coming."
I didn't know I had a brother... "Who's coming?!" I asked, alarmed.
He gave me a sad smile, one that told me I was too innocent to know. "WICKED."
"Stay with me, Calum!" My voice sounded weak... I was weak.
The young man shakes his head, "Someone's gotta distract them, kid. I'll be right back. Shut the door and don't come out."
I nodded my small head.
"Good. I love you, kiddo." He left and I pulled the door close to the latch, but I didn't shut it all the way. I wanted to watch what would happen.
That was a mistake.
Soldiers decked out in futuristic armor and armed with silver blasters entered the room. Calum threw a few punches but they did very little. WICKED tazed him with their blasters. He fell to the floor in pain and I winced when they kicked him in the ribs. Finally, they hit him over the head and knocked him out.
It took everything in me to not cry out.
WICKED dragged Calum out the door by his ankles.
***
Gathered around the door, everyone waited in urgency for them to open. We waited desperately for the fate of our friends to be known.
But they were more than our friends, they were our leaders. Our family.
But who the hell knew.
I was way too hungover for this shit, but I avoided Newt like the plague. If Alby came back, he'd probably go back to normal, but if he didn't...
I didn't know if I could continue with Newt being a Slinthead. Something needed to change if he stayed like this.
I was overthinking things, maybe even overreacting, but I was pissed and in pain. Besides, I knew what I was worth.
If Newt didn't recognize that, it was his..
Tears brimmed in my eyes, I had to stop thinking like this. Losing Newt was too painful to imagine.
I just needed to talk to him.
The issue was that I needed him to want to talk to me.
Finally, the low moan of the doors ringed in all of our ears. Dozens of heads perked and bodies pushed to get a view. Leah was on of the ones in the front.
The doors opened fully and nothing was there. Nothing but an empty stone corridor and thick vines of ivy.
Upon realizing the most predictable outcome came true, most of the Gladers walked away. All but Leah and Newt, who were both still holding out.
"Guys..." I approached them gently. "If they survived... they would've been waiting at the door."
I watch Newt carefully, afraid he'd snap at me again. The muscles around his jaw tighten and he refused to look me in the eye, still only focued on the Maze.
"How can you say that?" Leah says softly, her voice was ready to break. "Minho is strong, he knows that Maze inside and out-"
"I know he's strong," I cut her off. "But he has a Greenie and Alby, who is injured, on his shoulders. It's likely they didn't make it.."
"You're wrong," Newt nods his head towards the Maze. "Look."
Leah and I both turn our heads to see Thomas and Minho carrying an unconscious Alby towards the entrance.
"Get Cally!" Minho cried desperately.
***
Alby had been stung, just like Ben. Cally thinks we got him the grief serum soon enough though.
According to Minho, Thomas was the only reason any of them had made it back. Seemed unlikely but Minho was a man of his word. I guess their survival seemed unlikely too.
Newt had yet to talk to me. Maybe he was scared... I was.
"Felix?" Cally's knee nudged mine. "You were asked a question."
"Hmm?" I looked to her but she only nodded her chin towards Newt. He was in the middle of the room, at the commander's table. We were all having a much needed Keepers meeting.
Newt sighed, his eyes hardening. "Will some of your Track-Hoes be willing to learn Med-Jack positions?"
"Oh.." I swallowed dryly. "Yeah, that works."
Cally squeezes my hand. "Thank you," She whispers.
Newt nods. "Good. They'll help with watch shifts over Alby."
"Can I say my part now?" Minho urges from the left corner, his knee bouncing up and down.
Newt sighs, "Yes."
The two trade places, but Minho doesn't sit. His anxiousness forcing him to pace around the table in a circle.
"Thomas needs to be the new Keeper of the Runners," He says bluntly. Immediately the room outrages, as to be expected. Thomas was sat across from me, he looked timid.
"That's enough!" Newt gained control again. "Let the man speak!"
Minho sighed, "Alby and I would be dead if not for Thomas. When the doors closed... I ran. I was a coward and left them both for the Grievers."
"He's a shucking Greenie! He don't know shit-" Gally had more to say but Newt cut him off again.
"I said that's enough, Gally!" Newt was fuming... I didn't know if I had seen him this angry before. "Now shit the bloody hell up before I put you in the Slammer."
Gally gritted his teeth but obeyed.
"Thomas here deserves to be Keeper more than anyone." Minho finished. "That's all, I've said my piece."
Newt stood now, "Minho... he did break our number one rule: don't go in the Maze."
"And he did it to save our leader. We should be thanking him!"
Newt sighed, "Any other thoughts?" Minho sat back down.
Winston, the Keeper of the Slicers stood now. "Instead of killing him, we should put him in the Slammer for a while... then decide..."
Newt thought for a moment. "A day in the Slammer... and then he can train to be a Runner if he wishes." The room bursts into outrage again, but Newt doesn't bother to stop it.
"My decision is final," He said, but I wasn't sure if anyone heard him. He walked out the door, I sprung up to follow.
"Newt!" I call from the doorway. "Can we talk?"
He shook his head without looking at me, "I've got to check on Alby. Go home, Felix."
I should've listened. Not started anything.
But I was tired.
Tired of being used and ignored.
"You're my home, Newt." I said desperately. He stopped in his tracks and my voice broke. "At least... you were for a little while. I don't know anymore..."
There was a long pause of silence, but I could still hear something breaking.
"I didn't know it mattered to you." Newt's voice was just a tad softer now.
"It meant everything to me!" I cried. Newt turned to face me. "You mean fucking everything to me. So can you please stop being a slinthead because I love this... I love you and-" Before I was able to utter another word, Newt was crashing into me.
His lips touched mine with such fury that if I hadn't known better, I would've thought something was wrong.
But this felt like everything right.
His warmth swarmed into me like the golden sunshine of his soul. I craved him, needed him.
Him and I were like fire and ice, everything forbidden. He was the sun and the stars and I was the night sky.
He was destined to consume me.
His hands held my cheeks tightly and he pulled away. "I'm sorry, Felix. I'm sorry for being a dick." As if it would've mattered how he acted, I would still be miserably in love with him.
I nodded, breathing heavily, "Good. Don't do it again."
He smiled, the first smile I had seen from him in days. "Okay, 'Lix."