This book is being rewritten under a new title "Silently Drowning", although nothing is happening to this book or the series that goes with it, I do suggest reading the rewritten version.
Jasper Reed
He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind.
Envy can be dangerous.
I once heard someone say that envy belongs to those that lack the self confidence to be jealous. I think it's all bullshit.
Much like Luca Ferrari.
Bullshit.
What can I say about my dearest friend?
For one he's a real fucking idiot.
No I won't word it like that, he's really good at some things like his art for example but he's awful at reading people and their intentions. That makes him a blind idiot.
Oh and don't ask you for help with your math homework, I made that mistake in the third grade.
I've always envied Luca though.
His parents loved each other and they loved him, they loved their kids, their adoration was always so visible on their faces.
I guess mine did too but they just had a different way of showing it.
He has the perfect life paired with the perfect sister.
I think Luca is gay or something because how could he not fantasize about her while living in the same home? My dick would be hard every second of every day if I was in his position.
Not to mention, I'm nearly positive I saw him checking out that stupid bitch that I spotted following Sia around like a lost puppy. I need to figure out how to keep him away, he may cause me issues in the long run.
I fell in love with Alessia Ferrari a very long time ago, I can't even remember how old I was when I noticed the feelings swirling through my veins.
My dad loved my mom.
He loved her so much he would murder an entire village for her.
The problem was she didn't like to follow orders which oftentimes led to my dad beating the shit out of her and forced me to watch.
It was my reminder.
Dad would always remind me that love comes with sacrifices and if the one you love doesn't want to put in their weight like you fucking told them to then they have to deal with the consequences. Mom didn't like the terms and had to deal with the pain. It's her own fault.
That's what love is.
I don't want to hurt my princess but she won't listen otherwise.
One day she will get it. After high school I can propose which she will say yes because we love each other and can't picture life apart.
Then we can move far away from her family — keeping no contact with anyone — and start our own little family. Six kids sound good, maybe a dog and a cute little farm house. Bunnies are cute I guess. I think Sia likes bunnies, I will buy her two hundred bunnies if she asks. If it would keep her around so she doesn't try to run.
I wonder if her brothers would buy her bunnies?
I will always one-up them. She could never choose them over me, I don't have to worry though, she may live with them but I'm the one she chooses to sleep with.
"That whore won't stay away from my boyfriend!" Tiara yells as she enters my bedroom.
I have been living with Tiara and her mom for a little over a year now, it's better than being stuck on my own at all hours of the day, every day of the week.
It's just temporary anyway, just until Sia and I move in together.
"Don't talk about her like that." I snap knowing exactly what she's talking about.
"Your obsession with that slut is sickening." She grimaces "I almost feel bad for her... not quite but almost."
"You're one to talk." I shoot back.
"You know exactly why I don't want that fucking bitch to steal my boyfriend, it's not the same thing. Plus you're the one that said I have to look out for her because the family is into incest or interbreeding or something... I don't know... That sounds gross and doesn't make sense... Actually I think everything that comes out of your life is bullshit but I'm too tired to dwell." She continues to rant as she plops on my bed.
"Sure, make yourself at home." I mumble while staring at my favorite photos I have of my girlfriend pinned to the wall, grunting when I feel my pants tightening.Yeah I don't know how her brothers do it.
Or maybe she does open her legs for them.
No.
She would never cheat on me. Not like my mom cheated on my dad.
We aren't like them.
You useless woman! My dad yelled as the palm of his hand met my moms face with such force she stumbled and almost fell to her knees. I think the only reason she didn't was because dad gripped onto her hair so she didn't hurt herself.
"You know I didn't want to be in this 'relationship' anyway, the only reason I stayed was for Jason."
My name is Jasper.
"How pathetic, you don't even know your own son's name, tell me... Is he even mine or are you too busy whoring around to remember?" He asks as a menacing smile flashed over his face which caused even my stomach to churn.
When she didn't respond he slammed her head into the glass coffee table causing it to instantly shatter on impact.
"This is your fault darling, you were the one that wasn't faithful when all I've done is love you."
"This isn't love and you know it. You're absolutely fucking sick."
If she would have just listened, everything would be okay. Just like Sia will be okay once her training is complete then I won't have to hurt her anymore.
I'd get a job so she never has to work a day in her life, all she would have to do is clean and cook for our children.
Yeah, that sounds nice.
"Are you even listening!?" Tiara yells.
No, in fact I was not.
"Whatever, I need a plan to keep the skank away from my man."
"And what plan would that be?" I ask, I will not allow anyone to cause harm to my girl. I'd rather die than let any one hurt her.
"Like I would tell you, all you would do is put a major damper in my plans and I can't have that. One of us needs to have a brain in this house and you are obsessed with the girl. Knowing you, you would just try to stop me and I can't have that." She explains while thinking.
I need to find out what she's planning.
"Well if you tell me maybe I can help out, I don't want your stupid boy toy to touch my girl either."
"No. You will just hurt Niccolò, how stupid do you think I am?" She asks "but don't worry, I'll figure something out and you won't be caught in the crossfire." Then she walked out of my room as if she was never in here to begin with.
I love Alessia.
I'll be damned if I let any harm come to her, but first I need to find out what this 'plan' is.
**
A/N:
'The abused become the abuser' is much like 'the bullied become the bully', that doesn't mean you will automatically be abusive just because you were raised in a household that was.
What it means is that you are the one that could break the cycle. An abuser doesn't worry about becoming an abuser. It's all about breaking the chain.
"Refuse to inherit dysfunctional. Learn new ways of living instead of repeating what you lived through." ~ Thema Davis
[Words: 1290]
[Edited: July 7, 2023]