(unedited)
SIMPHIWE SHANDU THE HUSBAND
CHAPTER 46
SIMPHIWE
I do some excurse breathings to bring myself back from that down land. I don’t know why I am hurting this much. Or is it because I do not know how to deal with the hurt, I am facing. I take a deep breath. Time has passed. I've been sitting here for more than two hours. I checked my phone and there were no messages or missed calls from so cold family. What was I hoping for? You know what – as from this day forward I am writing them off. Nozi is my family after all, my only family that I will rely on when times are tough. It's so funny how my mother was so good at breaking my marriage apart without care. Now that she has broken it, she is playing far away from what she has broken. My phone rings my heart races thinking that its’ the woman who birthed me but it’s the hospital. I retrieve to answer. I am expecting some news. Good or bad. My heart has accepted whatever will be thrown in my face. I don’t know if I will be strong enough to accept defeat once again.
“Sir, you are needed at the hospital. It’s urgent.” I don’t ask what is wrong. I start my car and drive off straight to the hospital. I parked in the wrong zone parking lot. I head straight to the receptionist area and was directed to the doctor's office. I find him seated like he is deep in thought. He smiles when he sees me and stands up to shake my hand. “Family man.” That is the name that I have been provided with since I spent my most quality time here in the hospital.
“Doc, is everything alright with my wife?” I ask with my chest rising and down. I can’t bury another person. Jele’s funeral was too emotional for me - I don’t believe I am fit enough to attend another funeral. He takes a deep breath and takes his glasses off. This, I do not like. This reaction is something I do not want to see.
“I don’t know how to put this.”
“Did she finally leave me?” I ask with my shaky voice. I am hurt and...
“No, no, no. It's far better news than that.”
“Can you just go straight to the point!” I snap. I am growing impatient. If he keeps going around in circles thinking it will solve the equation, then he is derailing my emotions.
“Your wife woke up, but she suffered memory loss...” I do not wait for him to finish. I run straight to where Nozi is kept and surprisingly, she is not in the room she was in. I feel my stomach tying in knots. The nurse walks in pushing a wheelchair.
“Excuse me. Where is my wife?”
“Ow, she is the maternity ward with other p...”
“I know what a maternity ward is.” I say rushing out. I know my way around this hospital. The doctor is following me behind shouting my name. I don’t want to see him; I want to see Nozi. I push the door open, and I am told that I am not allowed to be within these premises. I do not care. I was once a doctor – so they should consider that! The doctor is now right behind me. My eyes roam around trying to search for her and I do not see her at all. Which ward is she on? I ask myself. I turn to face the doctor.
“Where is she?’ I ask. All eyes on us. The doctor is panting trying to catch his breath. He should hit the gym more often.
“Private ward.” He answers. “You didn’t give me no to tell you everything. Please, follow me and stop rushing things.” I follow him this time around walking with him at a normal pace.
“You said something about memory loss.” I swallow. Does she remember me?
“Yes. But months behind. In due course she will remember. The first thing she asked when she woke up was her husband.” I feel like screaming for the whole world to hear. So, Nosi actually remembers me! “Looks like you are the only person she remembers at the moment.” He said it, making me blush. Whatever the ancestors are doing they are definitely working overtime. There she is sitting straight up. She frowns looking at me but eventually bursts into tears. I rush towards her side and embrace her. Now that she awake, her stomach looks so huge.
“Where were you?” she asks clinging onto me. “Who made me pregnant? Is it true that I am pregnant?” she asks looking straight into my eyes. I want to laugh so bad bit the situation is not allowing me. I will save this for another day.
“I made you pregnant.” I say with a huge stuck in my throat. I wish I was the one that made her pregnant, but the circumstances said otherwise. I caress on her tummy. That is what I have been doing for the past months. The doctors said it will keep the baby alive – it’s they of me communicating. She starts crying all over again. I pull her to my chest and let her calm. I don’t want her stressing now that she is even more vulnerable. She will need me more than ever and I will need her more than ever.
“It's okay my love.”
“I am happy that God finally answered our prayers.”
“You don’t remember being pregnant?” I want to be sure. She shakes her head no. She is weak but none the less very much grateful that God decided to give her another chance. I spend some time with her making sure that she is okay. She doesn’t have energy but at least I know that she is awake. It will take time for us to recover, but she will eventually when she has finally gotten back on her feet. I look at her peacefully sleeping and I must say she still looks beautiful even after that weight loss. I smile emotionally. I thank God for remembering me in most times. I need to ask the doctor when will she give birth. I find him around the passage looking all lost.
“Are you okay?” I ask him.
“Yea, just tired. Double shift.” I know exactly what he is talking about. Being a doctor is no child’s play. It requires real men for it and not just any man.
“I can imagine. Look man I have a quick one here. About the baby. When will she give birth?”
“We will have to wait for her body to react. We can't take the baby out just because she is awake. If we go down that route, we might lose her.” Make sense. Fair enough, I agree with him.
“About the hospital bills.”
“What about them?”
“I am running out of pocket and...”
“You paid in advance – all the bills to delivery. You do not owe the hospital a cent.”
“Did I?” I do not remember anything!
“Yes. Look, I must go.” It was not me who made the payment. This has so much to do with Jele. He was prepared for everything. Some people know how to sort their lives in even death. I am still left confused with the blue blanket. Maybe it’s just a dream and I am reading too much into it. Where to from here? I will go home release the nanny and spend time with my kids. Maybe even bring them here, maybe Nozi might remember a bit. But what if I reveal that I got my kids through Infidelity. Probably not sending the kids to visit her. Maybe it will be a setback.
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“Babies!” I am in a lighter mood today. I am happy and very much alive. The past months I would come back from the hospital and go straight to bed to take a nap. But today I feel like being on the father mode.
“Sisi, I am releasing you early today.” I say in an ecstatic voice. She looks at me and smiles.
“Should I ask why?”
“Ow yes, my dear sister. My wife has finally woken up.” I say wishing to do a gwaragwara dance. She covers her mouth with her right hand and jumps up and down.
“That means she is coming home soon?”
“Not soon but yea soon. If you know what I mean.” We both laugh.
“Remember when I told you to keep praying and never lose hope. This is what I was talking about. God has finally remembered you.”
“Indeed, he did.”
“Will call my boyfriend to pick me up.” She goes up the stairs. I guess to take her handbag. I sit on the couch and smile while looking at my kids. They are so grown looking all good without their mother being present. What I love about my kids is that they do not cry for any reason. They are just quite kids and very peaceful to be around with. I look at Zuri and smile. She has been a very big sister to Fihliwe and I am very proud of her.
“Come to daddy.” She runs in my direction and throws herself in my arms. Fihliwe is just sitting there breaking all her dolls into pieces and putting them back up again. You do not disturb her when she is in this mode. The nanny comes down.
“The food is in the fridge. You will just preheat it. My boyfriend is here now. Bye kids.” She walks out and closes the door. I like her for my kids. She is very good with them.
“Hungry?’ I ask Zuri who is now focused on Pepa Pig. “Yah neh!” I laugh to myself. I decided to let them be. I guess I will make food for myself and chill.
NOZIMANGA
“Where am I?” I ask looking around. “Halo!” I feel my voice eco across the field. Looks like I am in a forest of some sort. I see a shadow coming towards me. This man has a huge smile on his face. For a second I get confused. How did I get here, and how did he know I would be here?
“Jele?” I look around. He just smiles and stands Infront of me. “Where is Simphiwe?”i asks – still he doesn’t reply. He comes closer and reaches out for my stomach. He rubs it without saying anything, his hands are so cold. He takes steps back until he disappears out of sight. That was so odd of him.
“Jele!” I swear this man knows how to pop up and just disappears just like that. I look around and it seems to be getting dark and I am all alone. I am trying to follow the direction he went by - but it seems like I am going backwards. I sit down and...
“Mrs. Shandu wake up!” I open my eyes and confusion floods back. Wasn't I in the forest? I feel my chest burning and like I have been hit by a truck. I rub it but my stomach just turns. Everything just comes up. They quickly make me lay on my side. I feel my strength leaving me. A sharp pain shot right through my lower abdomen made me flinch.
“Ouch!” I retort wiping my mouth. I lay on my back. The whole room is spinning. I force my body to lay on the side again. The pain seems to be getting intense by the second.
“Can I use the bathroom?”
“No, I believe you are in labor.” The doctor tells me. I am stuck in the labor part. This cannot be happening to me. Not when I have just woken up from the dead. Is he not the one who said I was out for months! I want Simphiwe.
“I want my husband.” I hiss grabbing the nurse's hand. The pain is too much for me and it hurts. It’s just unbearable. My entire abdomen is on fire. I open my legs then close them again.
“Go call him.” The nurse nods and rushes out of the ward.
“Why am in so much pain?” I groan curling my body into a ball. I want to stand my legs are not strong enough. I want to shit!
“Ngifuna ukubhosha!” I scream already pushing my stoop to come out. Quite frankly nothing comes out.
“Nothing is going to come. You haven't been eating solid for months remember.” He is just standing there with no help. So, I am taking the blame for all of this! This bloody hair is making me annoyed.
“Can you cut my hair?”
“No.”
“You are useless.” A hard pain strikes. I close my eyes and groan. Shouldn’t he be giving me something for the pain. I swear I want to shit! I tried pushing again but still nothing. It just the pee itself. I sit up straight that is also not helping. I kneel – that also is just making matters worse. You know what the painful part is, when the doctor tells you that you are not yet fully dilatated. They think it's turning us on if they keep pricking their two fingers into our pudendum!
Hours later Simphiwe comes in running. His eyes are all popped out. He looks sweaty and afraid. He comes on to the side of the bed and holds my hand.
“I came as soon as I heard.”
“Just leave me alone.” I cry. “Abuhlungu amabhandi. Just remove them”
“I can’t remove them. These are fetal monitoring. It measures the heart rate and rhythm of your baby; I mean of our baby.” The more he talks the more he annoys me. I click my tongue and look on the side. I tried removing them, but he held my hand and looked at me with those pleading eyes.
“Okay mam. You are now good to go.” The doctor looks at the screen then back at me. He finally removes the fetal monitoring and I get to have a fresh breath.
“You'll be taken to an operating theatre for your elective caesarean. Your theatre team will prepare you for surgery, which can take some time. You'll be prepared for your anesthetic so that you don't feel any pain during the surgery.” Simphiwe explains. The bed is being wheeled out. My mind is just in the wilder lands all lost. I am confused. How far am I? Have I been going to the doctors for checkups? What really happened that made me lose some memory of my life just a couple of months back? A lot does not make sense to me. I will not crack my head with all theories. When the time is right, I will remember. The lights are so bright in this room. Preparation takes place and anesthesia follows numbing the pain. My whole lower part is just cold.
“Do you feel anything?” The doctor asks. He pokes me with a needle underneath my foot.
“No.” Later the lights get dimmed and there was a huge light that was shining upon my only. I close my eyes...
All I could feel were the movements, but no pain inflicted. Simphiwe is clinging on to my hand like he is the one giving birth. I weakly smile. Does God have any idea how much I have been wanting to have a child. I'm sure his mother will be disappointed wherever she is. If she is not in my house causing havoc – that is what she is good at after all.
“Ow my God! He is so big.” The doctors say picking the baby up. Simphiwe looks at me like he is regretting something. Or is he beyond happy. The baby begins to cry with his tiny cries filling up the room.
“Looks like there is another head here.” The baby is being placed on my chest. He feels so warm. Again, I feel movements and indeed they pull out a baby with a big head. I frown looking at the baby.
“He is also a boy. Looks like God decided to bless you with boys this time around. Ay this child can really hide. How many ultrasounds did we do per week?” The look on the doctors face is not satifying. Maybe there must be something wrong with the baby. He looks at the baby on my chest and looks at the one he is carrying.
“Are you sure that this baby comes from her stomach?” Simphiwe asks looking astonished. I want to laugh so bad, but I am just too weak. The room erupts with laughter.
“You saw for yourself Sir. Your wife delivered two sons. But they look so different.”
“What do you mean they look different?” Simphiwe stands up.
“Looks like we are facing a heteropaternal superfecundation situation here...” I don’t hear the rest. I fall into deep sleep.
___
“Wakey, wakey.” That is Simphiwe waking me up from my peaceful sleep. I forgot that I just gave birth to two babies.
“Where are the babies?” I ask out of panic.
“Right beside you.” I turn my head to the left and here they are. One is so big and the other one is so tiny.
“Why is this one so small? He even has your big head!” He laughs and stands beside the baby cot.
“Yea.”
“And this one. He doesn’t look like you. He doesn’t look like me either.” He keeps quiet and clears his throat.
“They are just three hours old and already you want to tell who looks like who. They are still yet to change watch and see.” He might be right. I am too quick to judge. The other twin doesn’t settle me. I look at Simphiwe and he looks like he is deep in thought.
“Are you okay?” shouldn’t he be happy that I gave him two big heads even though the other one os not big.
“Just overwhelmed. We will manage with so many kids?”
I laugh. “What do you mean? It's just the two of them You making it seem like we just had a soccer team.” He chokes and looks on the side. I wonder what the hell is wrong with him.