Song:
Stand by Me (Ben E. King)
"I won't cry, I won't cry, no I won't she'd a tear, just as long as you stand, stand by me"
Lily Evans was a good friend.
Ever since she was a young girl with pigtails and blunt bangs that her sister had cut while her parents were out of the house, she had been a good friend. When someone fell, she helped them up. When someone cried, she knew exactly what to say to comfort them. When someone succeeded, there wasn't a hint of jealousy in her heart, just pure happiness and pride.
When Sirius Black got mocked after getting disowned, she had stood up for him and even let him win in their upcoming chess match.
Lily Evans was a good friend.
When Remus Lupin had revealed he was a werewolf to her, she had accepted him in a heartbeat, her hand reaching for the chocolate bar in her pocket before he even registered she wasn't going to abandon him.
Lily Evans was a good friend.
When Peter Pettigrew had gotten his heart broken for the first time, they had watched rom-coms together in her room in the middle of the night, trying to be as silent as possible so as not to alert her mom of the boy's presence in the room.
Lily Evans was a good friend.
When James Potter roamed the corridors alone after curfew on the days after a full moon to clear his head from the images of seeing his best friend turning into what he hated the most, she never said anything. No scoldings, no comments, no ratting out to teachers, nothing. She only ever passed him a coffee the next morning, half a sugar and some milk, just the way he liked it.
Lily Evans was a good friend.
Was she?
She really didn't feel like it anymore.
Lily knew her flaws very well. She could be pushy, too demanding and extremely short-sighted when angry. She didn't want to hurt people, so she avoided fights like the plague, knowing that the moment things got heated up she would stomp on the other person's patience, until the damage was too much to be reversed.
It was obvious she had messed up. She could feel the guilt creeping up on her, like bile rising in her throat. It made her sick to her stomach, because she had absolutely no idea how to make things right.
"She hates me now." Lily murmured, her knees brought close to her chest.
"She doesn't." James reassured her. "She's just a bit upset right now."
"I shouldn't have insisted."
"You didn't know." James calmly said. "You were just trying to help."
James' words weren't soothing her. Her words rang in her ears again and again, and she realized she had gone too far now that her own anger had worn off.
The door opened, Lily's head snapping to its direction. She had hoped Callisto would have come back, or at least that Remus would come to shout at her, but it was only Sirius and Peter that got inside the dorm.
"Why are you both so moody?" Sirius asked, plopping down on the bed. "And where's Callie? I have news."
He raised his hand, waving the newspaper he was holding slightly.
"Lily and Callie fought."
Peter frowned, "What? Why?"
"I was being pushy." Lily murmured, waving her hand dismissively. "Anyway, what news do you have?"
Sirius cleared his throat, opening the paper and folding it at a specific page.
"With the 'Wolfsbane' potion being greatly successful over the previous full moon, and many afflicted wizards and witches, as well as potion masters, supporting the importance of such a discovery, Damocles Belby will be awarded with an Order of Merlin, first class. The research committee heavily endorses the award to the famous potioneer, who has never shown his face, or participated in the interviews regarding the inspiration and the creation of the recipe for the Wolfsbane potion. Roman Nott, member of the research committee, says: "It is an honor to be able to award Mr. Belby with such a high ranking title . He is a great representative of pureblood abilities, and he should be applauded for his efforts."" Sirius paused for a moment, letting the newspaper down. "In other words, Callie is getting practically knighted, so we should celebrate."
"Perhaps now isn't a good time." James thoughtfully said. "Moony went to find her."
"This is good news. She'll cheer up."
"I really fucked up, so maybe we should leave it." Lily snapped, her tone coming off much more irritated than she had intended it to.
Sirius frowned, "Why did you even fight?"
"She thought Callie was pregnant." James explained. "Lily kept telling her to go get a test, she said no multiple times, because she knew she wasn't pregnant. Lily wasn't very much convinced, and then it went to shit."
"So, no little Moonies."
"Not at all." James confirmed. "And maybe don't even mention little Moonies for the time being... or ever."
"She doesn't want Moony's kids?" Peter asked, raising an eyebrow. "They will be tall and have a nice voice. What's the issue?"
"It's not a matter of want."
"No, but it is." Sirius pondered. "I mean, you have sex, she gets pregnant, nine months later she poops out the child. Simple and nice."
"Poops out the child?"
"Well, yeah, in a broader sense of the word."
"Okay, do you both promise to keep your mouths shut?" James asked, both boys nodding seriously. "Callie can't have children. Essentially, Lily made her snap and she said she can't have kids, and then left. Moony seemed to know already, and went after her because she was upset."
They both stayed silent, processing what James had just said.
"Isn't that good though?" Peter asked, frowning. "For Moony at least. They won't have any... accidents."
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Sirius blurted out, anger evident in his voice. "He just told you Callisto, your friend, is having an issue and your first thought is that?"
"It was a joke." Peter groaned. "Lightening the fucking mood."
"Not a very funny one." James criticized, annoyance flashing in his eyes. "You better not say that in front of them."
Lily nodded, "You shouldn't have said it in the first place."
"You're one to talk." He scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Didn't your comments get us in that situation in the first place?"
"It doesn't affect you in any way, so no, it didn't get you in any situation." James coldly said. "The only people it affects are Callie and Moony. Lily didn't know and she regrets pushing her. Unfortunately, you made that comment just because you're a dick, and not because you don't know any better."
The door closed with a loud bang as Peter angrily exited the dorm, leaving behind the three Gryffindors in even worse spirits than before.
"You were too harsh on him." Lily murmured, turning to look at James. "Now we have three friendships to mend."
"He deserved it."
"He's been acting like a proper douchebag lately." Sirius huffed, lighting up a cigarette. He didn't even care about James and Lily silently judging him as he blew out some smoke, directing all his frustration on the cigarette. "The exams will finish and he'll go back to normal."
"If you say so."
"Either way, we have other people to worry about now." Sirius said. "You need to talk to her tomorrow."
Lily shook her head, "She doesn't want to see me."
"She's just upset you found out this way."
Lily nodded. Of course he was right, they needed to talk about it. She needed to apologize for pressuring her. She needed to make sure Callisto knew that she would be there for her no matter the circumstances.
Lily Evans was a good friend.
~ ~ ~
It seemed as Lily's purest of intentions to make things right weren't particularly well received neither by Callisto, nor Remus. Callisto insisted on eating at the Slytherin table and didn't step foot in the Gryffindor Tower since that day, while Remus stayed away from her even if it meant eating alone and locking the dormitory door, which had always been unlocked.
Peter too was still quite angry with their argument, but didn't do anything to show it. His feelings were always only expressed in the secluded corridor, with Lucius Malfoy whispering on his shoulder like the devil, and firewhiskey clouding his thoughts.
It was the perfect breeding ground for an infection of the mind.
Lily was growing desperate seeing her friends avoiding each other like they had the plague. The guilt was eating her from the inside, digging its way to her heart and making it impossible for her to focus on anything else. Perhaps something that could be added to Lily's flaws was 'inability to cope with guilt'.
And so, she was waiting now in the corridor leading to the Slytherin Common Room, ready to drag her away from her friends the moment she saw her.
She soon arrived, with Narcissa walking by her side. Their voices were hushed and low, something between a whisper and a mumble. Lily pointed her wand at Callisto and the girl collapsed on the ground, right in front of Narcissa's feet.
"Don't panic!" Lily exclaimed, coming out of the shadows. Narcissa's wand was already pointed at her, Lily's hand slightly extended defensively.
"What the fuck, Evans?!"
"I need to talk to her."
"Ever thought of just asking?"
"She's avoiding me." Lily explained, bending down to lift Callisto. She stopped after a few failed efforts, Narcissa observing her confusedly.
"What are you doing?"
"She's heavier than she looks." Lily huffed, blowing away a strand of hair falling in front of her face. "Holy Mary, I hadn't thought this part through..."
"Who?"
"Holy Mary?"
"The McDonald girl?" Narcissa asked, confused. "Her name is Callisto, Evans, what Mary shit are you on about?"
"Ugh, forget it."
Narcissa didn't look all that convinced, but didn't say anything. Lily took in a deep breath and finally managed to lift Callisto, her face reddening at the effort.
"All done?" Narcissa asked as Lily positioned the unconscious girl differently, her limbs sticking out in odd directions.
"Thanks, Black!" Lily hummed, sending her a small smile, before she slowly walked away, disappearing in the turn of the corridor.
Narcissa stood in the empty corridor, her arms crossed under her chest.
"Okay then."
~ ~ ~
Callisto could have sworn she hadn't voluntarily entered the Kitchens. In fact, she didn't even know how she had gotten in there in the first place, because Narcissa and she had just eaten lunch.
She let out a small groan as pain erupted in the back of her head, and she touched it, feeling a small bump protruding.
"Sorry, I accidentally bumped your head on the entrance." A voice said, making Callisto shoot up.
Lily was sitting opposite from her, a sheepish smile on her lips. She immediately went to stand up, only to struggle against invisible restraints that bound her to her seat. Not discouraged at all, she tried to move with her chair to the entrance, only to find it was surely glued on the floor.
Callisto just glared at her, her lips closed as she refused to utter a single word to the girl. The staring match went on for a while, when a small voice was heard behind them.
"Mistress Evans!" The house elf joyly said, its tiny, bony arms wrapping around the girl's leg. "What can Lila do for you and your friend?"
"Hey, Lila." Lily greeted, smiling. "This is Callisto Claire. Could you please get me something that will make her forgive me for being a bad friend?"
"Lila could make some cupcakes for Mistress Evans."
"Thank you." Lily smiled, turning to Callisto as the elf disappeared. "I'm sorry for kidnapping you, but I needed to talk to you and you've been avoiding me."
"Talk all you want." Callisto coldly said. "Doesn't mean I'll listen."
"I have everything written down." Lily sheepishly said, taking a folded piece of parchment from her pocket. "Okay, so, here it goes."
She cleared her throat.
"My dearest, Callie." She started. "I can't stop thinking about our fight, and I feel incredibly sorry for pressuring you into telling me about your situation, without you wanting to. I didn't know, but that doesn't excuse the fact that I was out of line."
Callisto couldn't help the small scoff she let out at that.
"I was stressed about the possibility of you being pregnant at that time, and I completely neglected everything you said on the matter. I shouldn't have done that, and I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel betrayed, humiliated, or-" She huffed and closed the paper, her lips pursed. "Fuck that stupid, prepared thing. My point is, I miss talking to you and I know I fucked up like... gigantically, but I want us to go back to normal again. If you don't want us to, I'll just leave you with the muffins and I guess I'll bang my head on the wall on the way out..."
She paused for a moment.
"Sorry for your head too." She murmured. "Holy shit, this is a disaster..."
Lily didn't expect to hear Callisto snicker slightly, an amused smile on her lips. In fact, she almost asked her if she had indeed laughed, managing to constrain herself at the last minute.
"So, let me get this straight." Callisto said. "The pregnancy thing happens, then you curse me into unconsciousness and make me hit my back on the floor, you abduct me, you bang my head on the way here, and now you want me to forgive you... about all that."
Lily's eyebrows furrowed, "It's an... ambitious plan."
"Lily," Callisto sternly said. The redhead could feel the rejection coming, her cold tone preparing the ground for disappointment. "Don't do it again."
Her eyes widened in surprise, "Wait does this mean..."
"It means that it's time I come to terms with the fact that I'm sick by forgiving you and talking to all of you about it, because apparently, I shouldn't feel ashamed, and you're all here for me."
Lily could only open and close her mouth like a fish, unable to find the right words.
"Also, fuck you for banging my head." Callisto scoffed, rubbing the back of her head. "I have a bump now."
"You can slap me if you want."
"Are you sure?"
Lily seemed a bit unsure, but nodded nonetheless, "Yes, it's for us to be even."
"In that case," Callisto drawled with a small smirk. "I owe you a slap. Not now, but someday, Evans, I will make you see stars."
"Oddly enough, that's not a promise I rarely hear."
Callisto gasped, her nose scrunching up in disgust. "Gross."
"As if you and Lupin are any better."
~ ~ ~
It was one of the only times Remus had sat with the guys after the fight. They were all on the dormitory floor, Peter and Sirius threatening to kill each other's pawns as the chess game progressed. He wasn't all that invested if he was honest, supporting Sirius with half a heart, while James was on the verge of creating a fan club just for Peter's Knight.
All four heads snapped to the direction of the door as Callisto came in with Lily by her side. It seemed as if the chess battle had turned into an actual one for a brief moment, with James not being all that supportive of friendly violence anymore.
"Hello, girls." Sirius sheepishly greeted. "Are you about to kill each other right now? Because I really can't tell... You both look constipated."
"Oi!" James and Remus immediately said, Sirius raising his hand defensively.
"We just want to announce that we're not friends anymore." Callisto said, shrugging. "We discussed what happened, and we both decided it's better to just leave it all together."
"WHAT?" James shrieked, looking completely taken aback. "You can't be serious right now!""
Lily nodded, "No, we aren't both because he's right next to you, and because that was just a bunch of bullshit."
"Thank Merlin." Sirius sighed, shaking his head slightly. "Having you both hating each other is very impractical. I mean, what am I supposed to do with the extra Queen tickets I have..."
James's jaw dropped, "You invited them before me?!"
"Naturally." Callisto hummed, sitting next to Remus. "You're embarrassing."
"You love me."
"Well, yes, my life span is predicted to be much shorter than your average witch, so I've taken it upon myself to be kind to pigs, just in case they consider having me go to Heaven instead."
"How much shorter are we talking about?"
"60 years in total, give or take a few."
"I can't tell if she's joking right now." James announced, turning to everyone else that looked at Callisto with the same dumbfounded expression.
"I'm not." Callisto stated. "Lady and gentlemen, my entire family is cursed!"
Silence fell in the room, the cheerful tone in her voice covering how bittersweet she felt. Remus' hand was on hers, his gaze fixed on her fingers. He didn't dare to look up, maybe if he looked nonchalant, the situation wouldn't be as grim.
"What do you mean?" Sirius asked, the smile fading from his lips.
She took in a deep breath, bracing herself. There was now going back now. She already had enough on her plate, getting this out of the way was for the best. She could already feel the relief as she looked into her friends' eyes, her thumb absentmindedly going over Remus' scarred knuckles.
"I have a blood curse."
Remus looked at his friends, immediately recognizing the pity that flashed in their eyes. The same thing had happened when they confronted him about his absences and scars, making the blood in his veins freeze in fear. Was that how Callisto was feeling right now? His grip on her hand tightened ever so slightly.
"You're a maledictus?" Sirius asked, disbelief in his voice. "But, we've never seen you turn into an animal."
"I'm not a maledictus. It's different."
James frowned, "Is that why..."
"Yes." Callisto answered. "It's from Vera's side of the family. It becomes stronger with every generation and it is impossible to cure."
"So, you're dying?" Sirius questioned, anger in his voice. Remus recognized that too. He wasn't angry at Callisto, but with the fact that Callisto was the one to bear the curse. It had been the same with him, although it took a great deal of explanation for 13-year-old Remus to understand that Sirius wasn't enraged at him.
"I'm not on my deathbed, Sirius." Callisto sternly said. "I take medication so I can function like all of you, and I avoid anything that may put strain on my body. Sometimes, that's not enough, but it's worked up to now."
She paused for a moment.
"We all have it. All the women at least." She huffed. "Even Elena, which is just an additional proof that my parents are selfish. She's my aunt from my dad's side, and she would have been completely fine if my parents hadn't gotten married. They could still be together, just not as a married couple, and Elena would be healthy."
"And you?"
"I'd still have it."
"How is it?" Lily asked, a bit unsurely. "I mean, how does it feel?"
"When I relapse?"
"Yes..."
"Oh, it gets insane." Callisto murmured, letting out a weak laugh. "I was off my medication last year for two months and I spent one month in the hospital practically getting spoon-fed while being high off my ass on painkillers. Plus the crazy shit I did before I was sent there because I was having some episode of the sort. I didn't sleep for an entire week, but I was feeling more energized than ever. In the hospital, it was the most boring month of my life, I won't even try to deny it... I mean, at least when I was younger I'd have company because Kenny, he's a maledictus, would be human for a few hours every day, but he turned into a stork last year and he can't change back now...."
"A stork?"
"A stork."
"Poor guy."
"I just wanted you all to know, that's all." Callisto stated. "What matters is that right now I'm fine, and that I owe Evans a very painful slap at some point."
She didn't leave any room for questions. They didn't need to know everything, it would only be a waste of time to explain every single detail of her condition. Besides, she didn't want them to act any differently just because of the curse.
Her gaze met with Remus' and he smiled reassuringly, no need for him to say anything. It was as if she could hear his thoughts.
I'm here for you. We all are.
~ ~ ~
Y'all how are you?