TW!! - Depictions and discussions of gore, death, and abuse.
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"Is there anything else we should put on his plaque?"
Ginny barely hears the question addressed to her. The rough nudge at her side is what really makes her blink back into the real world.
The world she doesn't want to be in.
Not one part of her belongs to it anymore.
All the pieces worth living for aren't here.
She looks up from the finger she is grasping between her other hand tightly, to the people surrounding the table. "Sorry, what?"
A frustrated huff from Aberforth is heard over the forceful drop of his quill. "Ms. Weasley, you knew him better than anyone else here. Is there anything you think should be added to his? We are all needed at the ceremony soon, and I would like to be able to finalize the memorial plaques before this meeting ends. Even though he will not be buried today as requested."
She can't help the scoff that leaves her throat. A meeting to finalize the burials for those of them who hadn't made it. A group of survivors doing ridiculous things to try to make the absences, the lives, what they gave into something grand.
Trying and failing to make it enough.
To honor them.
What a load of rubbish. It was all just to make the living more comfortable. A selfish act in her opinion.
The dead didn't care. They weren't here anymore to care. But the survivors were. Maybe shit like this helped some people with their grief. Maybe she was being cruel and a cynic. But this didn't help her.
Placing words in exchange for whole lives would always fall short.
That is what she is currently being forced to attend. Another fucking pointless meeting to wade through. That forces her to exert precious energy she was trying to save for more important matters. It was draining to have to pretend. Pretending to be here in this room.
Like she actually cares about what words get placed for people to skim over on their way to buy supplies for their new job, or books for their children's school year, or any other normal event that everyone would be able to do again with this second chance they had 'won'.
It was already starting to happen.
5 days. It had been 5 days since the war ended.
5 full days of events, ceremonies, speeches, parades, photos, and life.
People returning back to before.
But not her.
No.
She is still on that floor.
She is still holding Theo. Watching his eyes close.
In those few moments.
That is where she has been.
Because some moments last longer than time. They are more than that. More powerful than numbers, and light and dark. They transcend breaths, and the world spinning, and the people moving.
Always moving.
Moving forward they keep telling her.
Moving to a better tomorrow.
But tomorrow for her will be the same as today.
And the day before that.
And the day before that.
And the day before that.
Because all they hold, all that they are filled with, are those few minutes with him.
Of brown curls.
Of green eyes.
Of holding his hand.
Of watching that bloody fucking half-smile appear.
Of wading in the water of that moment; becoming exhausted as the current tries to move her forward.
Trying to take her away.
It would drown her soon; staying there with him.
She knew it.
But she didn't care anymore.
What happened had taken up more than those moments. Some things that happen to a person have the power to do that. To take up days, weeks, months, whole lives.
They consume time, and make it stop. Never to start again.
She clasps her hands back into one another, and squeezes hard.
I'm never going to let go of you...
I don't think I am able to.
Ron elbows her in the side again, and she looks up to meet Aberforth's eyes looking frustratedly down at her. Waiting for a response. "I think he wouldn't give two shits about what was on his plaque."
The git's head shakes. Her mother's head shakes. Others try to pretend she hasn't said anything.
Oh, am I making you uncomfortable? This is what makes you uncomfortable as we sit around and talk about our dead loved ones?
Fuck all of you.
Aberforth picks up the pieces of parchment, and taps them against the top of the table to form a precise stack.
A stack of orders for plaques for the dead.
The stack is large, the names are familiar, and the ages are young.
The sound of the tap is heavy, making her flinch at the thick collection of forms being placed into a box to be owled to the supplier.
I wonder if Teddy used the same one?
"Well if you have nothing to add, then we shall move onto the last item of business before the ceremony." The older wizard ties a ribbon around the box, and whistles. A large barn owl comes swooping in and picks up the package, and flies out the open window. "The press will be allowed into St. Mungos today directly after the ceremony. And all of you are requested to make an appearance. They will be given access to only the second and fourth floors."
At this, her brother sits up straighter in his chair next to her. "The second... But the healers are only allowing immediate family to see her. They have closed off all access, how are they..."
"They will not be going to disturb Ms. Granger during her tumultuous healing Mr. Weasley. They will only be allowed to her door. The main focus will be on getting documentation of moving some of the fallen Order members from where they are being held on the fourth floor, to their respected burials."
The fourth floor...
His floor.
Ginny closes her eyes, and stops exerting her energy to keep her afloat.
Sinking deeper, and deeper, and deeper.
Everything that was her actual present begins to sound further and further away until it is nothing but muffled noises, hazy images, and figures that bob with the current.
Just a hand in hers. That is her anchor. That is what holds her steady in the water consuming her.
She needs to get her hand back in his.
She sees his green eyes down here. Looking up at her.
She feels the hot, red, blood pouring out of him. She sees herself pressing the openings back together like somehow that would fix it. She listens to her voice losing all control and saying so many things. Damning things. Trying to remember anything about healing. Hating herself for not taking her precious time with him to learn more. Because he could probably fix all of this.
He could fix anything.
Anything, but himself.
She was letting him down.
The fucking healing kit is right next to her with all the answers, and she has no idea which one is the answer for Theo.
He starts to speak to her, and fluid comes with his words.
With Teddy's words to her.
Goodbye words.
She knows them as soon as he says them. He knows he is dying. But she can't accept them. No, he has to make it.
Then he speaks again. Requesting something. Somehow lifting his arm to show her what he wants.
Maybe it is how I can save him.
She is digging in his pocket, feeling the squish of the blood as her hand sinks in and pulls out the galleon. She can't recall what she said. Not word for word at least. What she said didn't matter. All that matters down here is him. Him in her arms telling her some obnoxious word for blue.
To write it, and send it.
Like the action makes perfect sense to him.
He is getting paler. His eyes are starting to droop more and more. His body is becoming heavier in her lap.
She does as he asks her to do. She can't deny him. Not now. Not after once a-fucking-gain hurting the people she cares about with her rash decisions.
Ron was supposed to handle the snake. That was the plan. But when Hermione was being hurt, and Malfoy was placing his hand in his pocket, when the burning of the galleon could be felt, they made a decision.
They made the decision to use this moment, and do whatever necessary to make sure the noseless git died.
Whatever was necessary now felt like a horrible decision. She had meant about her own fate. Not his.
A smile, her favorite smile is forming on his face now. It forms slowly down here underneath the water. Very, very slowly.
The left side creeping up and making the creases in his cheek for what feels like a long, long time. It is this moment that always goes the slowest.
That half-smile of his.
As his eyes close, close, close. Until the green is gone.
The green is gone again.
Then the moment turns into nothing but chaos, and agonizing noises, and Hermione on the floor, and Malfoy yelling at her, and Zabini showing up out of nowhere.
Then she is letting him go, letting go of his hand. Letting go again. Letting go of everything that was left of her with him.
It all stays with him on that floor.
That is why she is still there.
Even after Hermione and Malfoy disappear, and the others show up, and the fighting ends.
Maybe it is a mistake. Well, more than likely it is a mistake. Most of her decisions ended up being horrible mistakes, but she runs back over to him. Determined not to leave him. Repeating fucking history.
She keeps trying to cast a diagnostic charm. To see if his heart is still beating, for something to tell her what she needs to bloody do.
It plays in a loop. The images, the feel, the smell, the taste, the moment.
Loop after loop after loop.
Always ending with a voice.
Always ending with the last person in the world she thought would be talking to her in this moment, looking down at his son, telling her she needs to take him back to the manor now.
He spits out the words before the binds and silencing charm are placed, as he is escorted away with the rest of the Death Eaters.
"Gin, you there? Are you listening?"
She shakes her head again, and comes up to the surface of a place different than the meeting room she had been in.
She is standing.
Now she is standing behind a curtain.
And there are voices.
Lots and lots of voices.
Oh fuck me sideways...
The ceremony. The ceremony was about to begin.
She must have spaced out again, gone under so deep she somehow got here without realizing.
Well that is a new power.
"I fucking hate this." She leans back into the railing, and rubs at the skin of her chest.
Her brother places the sword of Gryffindor into his other hand, squeezing the hilt hard. "Yeah..."
She rolls her eyes at him. "Don't try and act like you do Ron. We all know you are loving every second of finally being the hero."
Her brother's hand stops circling the sword, and he meets her gaze. He looks tired, drained. Probably just as much as she does. The bags under his eyes are back, along with the purple hue to his skin. His beard is long and looks like it has been a while since he has trimmed it.
The Order had been carting him around ever since the victory, Ever since he killed the noseless git, and was able to secure the body.
They had wanted to do the same with her. But she had given them her second favorite finger again. She wasn't leaving. She wasn't wasting precious time on fortifying all the stupid lies. She guesses she ignored one order too many, and was subsequently dragged to the fucking meeting earlier, and apparently walked here as well without really taking any of it in.
Still too deep with Theo.
"Fuck you Gin. I wanted to win with them. I would give anything to have done this with them instead of by myself."
Ginny scoffs, and moves to stand across from him.
"You didn't do it by yourself you prat. Did you see the stack of names for the plaques? And Hermione gave every part of herself to make this happen."
She rubs her hands over her face, pressing into the temples and trying to get her vision to focus. To try and be as present as possible. So she can get back as quickly as she can.
"You know what I mean. All of this, even... even what is about to happen doesn't feel right without them." He tosses the sword onto the ground, and sits down on the stairs leading up to the stage hidden by the curtain.
"Yeah well none of how all this shit is going down is right."
She doesn't want to be here. Just like she didn't want to attend the other mandatory events that had taken place over the last week. All to help create this new beginning. All to help boost morale, and get the wizarding world back into motion.
Event after event to solidify so many lies into history. But what were a couple omissions and falsities for the greater good right? Hadn't that been the way of The Order since the first war? That was how all the leaders operated and ran this side of the war since the creation of The Order.
Almost the truth here.
Invoking the naive young to take on heavy consequences before they understood what it all really meant there.
Creating a whole fucking false story about Harry Potter and his death to cover up the lies here.
She should care.
She should care more than she does.
She probably should be actively doing something, or at least trying to fight against the false narratives being created.
But she doesn't have the energy.
All of it, every last drop of it, was still with Theo.
"Sometimes sacrifices have to be made for..."
"For the greater Godric's gonads good, yes, I know Ron. I have been hearing that rubbish saying for years now as I watch the greatest goods die because of it. Sorry if I am unconvinced."
He doesn't say anything back to her. They stand there listening to the crowd, both seem to be sick with the idea of walking up on that stage.
"Is there any chance I could... borrow the cloak today?"
"No." Her answer is immediate. She needs the cloak. The ferret needs the cloak. She knows exactly why her brother is wanting her cloak, and hearing his denial filled, bollock's beliefs would not help Hermione right now.
Not with everything she was still working through.
"He meant a lot to me too Gin! I have just as much a right to use the cloak as you do."
"Oh? Did he put his cock inside of you too?"
She leans back against the railing of the stairs, and crosses her arms in triumph as her brother visibly winces.
"Blimey, just stop..." Ron shakes his head and lets out a deep sigh as he stares into the space in front of him. "I won't tell anyone, but we both know I know so... How is she? Really?"
Ginny lets out a huff, and lowers her hand to rub at her heated chest again.
"They have her asleep a lot. But sometimes, when she is awake, it seems like she is close, but then she slips again. Back to the 'other her' as I guess she used to call it."
Her brother's head falls farther in between his legs as his hands go to fists at his sides. The skin around the knuckles becomes paler as his grip tightens. "I'm afraid we are never going to get her back."
Ginny steps closer and breathes in deeply, trying to see if she can smell the all too familiar stench that had been encasing him for months. The substance that took her funny, easy going brother away, and replaced him with an always angry and cruel shadow. Hermione said how he reminded her of when he was burdened with a horcrux back during their hunt. The time he had left them. The time she knew Harry even had trouble truly forgiving him.
She doesn't smell anything, but moves to sit directly next to him just to make sure.
Ron looks up, and rolls his eyes.
"I haven't slipped. Still sober. Won't say it has been easy though, or that I haven't been tempted. Seeing her fucking kiss the prick, then coming back to the battle bleeding and naked, and hearing him say he loves..." His voice breaks, and he lowers his head into his hands, and rubs at the skin. "It, it hasn't been easy. But I can't save her if I'm drunk. I can't win this match unless I am fully aware and able. And knowing that things will be the same again soon is what is keeping me going."
Ginny doesn't understand exactly what Ron is saying. She isn't sure if it is her own unhealthy coping mechanism making his words make no sense to her, or if what he is saying truly doesn't make any sense. She squeezes her eyes shut and tenses the muscles in her neck, trying to force more cognition into her brain. Like that actually worked.
"I get it. Trust me, it took me a while to believe it too honestly. But she and the ferret are actually really good together. Maybe if we wouldn't have been so caught up in our own romance drama; what with you and Lavender, and Harry and I, we would have seen what was going on between them and..."
"Merlin's saggy left tit Ginny, you don't believe all that rubbish do you?" He sits up, and straightens his shoulders. Like he is about to fight. "Seriously, even after the healers report that labels the damage to her mind? How much of it has been fractured, combined, obliviated, and messed with, you believe the fucker didn't take any part in that? In making this... This Hermione that chooses a man who killed our friend, who stood by and did nothing as she was tortured, who called her that word, who tortured people to death, who massacred fucking teenagers, who only came around to our side once he had an in to protect himself with. Seriously?"
"Yes seriously, because your denial makes no fucking sense! The stuff between them has been going on since we were kids! And if it really was all some last effort in saving his own arse, don't you think it would have made more sense for him to let Dolohov have her after it was evident we won? Instead of risking his own life to get her back? Think Ron, actually think. Get passed this perceived idea you have of Hermione, and see who she really is now. Maybe it is time to let her go."
Her brother scoffs loudly, and stands up to grab the sword off the ground.
"I was paying attention! I was always paying attention to her! That was the fucking problem with me and Lavender or me and Padma! It was always her! And yes I fucking saw him. I knew he wanted her in a twisted way Ginny, but she didn't! I would have seen it. I would have... have felt it when we kissed. I know it." Ron's anger is turning into something else. She can see it. Transforming from rage into hopelessness. Into fear as his head bowes and the muscles in his hands go slack. "I... I can't let her go. I can't. If I do then... then it is all gone. Everything that could still be made right and normal again is gone."
"Do you still love her?"
"Yes." She doesn't even finish her question before he answers.
He looks up and she can see the pain in his blue eyes. How angry he still is at everything, but she thinks he is more angry with himself than anything else.
"I am not talking about in a friend or family way, Ron. I am talking about really being in love with her. Giving every piece of yourself to her for the rest of your life and regretting nothing. Because honestly, I think you two never really figured out if it was everything or maybe just a close... almost."
He doesn't say anything back to her for a while, and she is thankful. Her head is pounding as she tries to get her vision to focus and be prepared for what is about to happen.
"I want her to be safe and happy. Above anything else. If I know for certain she is then... I guess it doesn't matter what is everything or almost to me."
Ron stands straighter as he speaks, and nods his head to himself. Like he is reaffirming something within him.
"Well, I know it is hard to believe, but I don't think there is anywhere she could be safer than with the bleached fer..."
"Mr. And Ms. Weasley, please be ready. You are on in a few minutes."
They both look up to see a group of people walking towards them. With the new Minister of Magic leading the way.
The man who had addressed them pulls them both up off of the stage entrance, and walks up to disappear on the other side of the curtain.
There is no way she can actually do this.
It was so fucking stupid.
Maybe if she scooted back towards the wall, no one would notice her and she could make a quick get a way. So she can get back and stop wasting more time.
She slowly moves over to the wall, thinking it will only take her a few seconds to be out of sight and then she could....
"Ms. Weasley, get up here now."
She stops dead in her tracks and groans up to the ceiling. "Listen Mister Magic I..."
"That is Minister Shacklebolt to you and..."
"Whatever, how about instead of making me pretend for the fucking greater good, you just owl me this hunk of metal instead and..."
"Ginbug, this is one of the highest honors a wizard or witch can be granted. Harry would want you to accept it." Her father's hand grasps her shoulder, and kindly pushes her forward.
She doesn't want to do this.
Ginny was an excellent liar. She lied to herself all the time. She had been lying to herself for close to a year now almost every single day.
You are fine gingersnap.
You are going to be fine.
She moves under her fathers gentle touch up one stair, then the next, then the next.
An older wizard's voice she doesn't recognize is speaking as she moves closer to the large curtain. "...these members have exemplified bravery, sacrifice and strength. Their accomplishments, and actions led to this war finally being over. And today we are here to honor them..."
The world on one side of the curtain. The truth on the other.
Kingsley reaches out, and presses down on a crease in the thick fabric. Trying to take away the imperfection in the veil. Making it as pleasant to the eye as possible.
"Do you enjoy this? Lying to the world?" The words spill out of her, but they make Shacklebastard pause.
For years she had dreamed of this all finally being over. Of life going back to the way it used to be.
But now she realizes how childish and naive that was for her to think. They had past the time of that world existing again a long time ago. The old world, those children... they were all dead one way or another.
"Sometimes Ms. Weasley, what we need is not the truth. Sometimes a lie is the kindest thing we can offer."
What a manipulative load of shit that is...
"Our world is fragile right now. Hanging on the cusp of becoming one thing or another, and we have the responsibility, the platform, to sway it. Would you rather us focus on all of the hard decisions and mistakes we have made that I know have a hold on many of us who were there? All issues that would create divide where divide is not needed? We will carry the heavy weight of the truth for them."
"Absolute bollocks Mister Magic."
"Ginevra Weasley!"
She jerks her arm out of her fathers hand, and spins on him.
"No dad! It is true! They are pretty words that are empty! Can't you hear it? All he is concerned about is his potential interim being taken away if the governments learned they had been lied to. Had given their people based off of nothing but empty words like right fucking now! All of this is empty! Because of the lies, because of the people who are being left out, and everything they gave. And the damn people being added that have been dead this whole time."
"What would you have us do Ms. Weasley? Would you prefer me to allow the press to see the spectacles? To see and share what Ms. Granger went through? Would you rather us admit Mr. Potter's untimely death and the secret of his life to keep Voldemort at bay? Would you like us to try to make sense to all of these naive people who were not there, the intricacies of each one of these situations? Do you think they will understand? Do you think they honestly want to know? Or do you think making this all easier to digest is the last sacrifice we can make for them?"
He steps forward as she continues to glare at him. He reaches up and unclips the title holding badge from his robes.
"If you have better ideas, and want to handle all of this by all means..."
He holds out the large MM pin in front of her. He is mocking her. Showing her subtly how her little temper tantrum right now, was just that. Just a nothing girl angry about something. She didn't have any power. Not against him, and everything he controlled now. At least not yet. Not without them.
But she would kiss her Great Aunt Tessy's birthmark before she let this bastard treat her like this.
Ginny smirks and she sees the surprise on his face as she grabs the badge out of his hand, and starts to clip it to her robes.
"Thanks for the offer there Kings, but I am not one for political games. But I will keep this."
She clips the badge upside down, turning the two M's into W's.
Wicked Witch...
Her breath gets stuck in her throat, and the water around her starts to feel more present. More heavy. More powerful.
Like it always did anytime her mind traveled to Theo.
I need this over with. I need to get back.
She doesn't give the men time to respond before pushing past them all, and grabbing the curtain onto the stage.
The noise of the crowd, the lights, the sound of a booming voice being amplified over it all hits her like a tidal wave.
Screaming.
WAVE
Clapping.
WAVE
Spotlight taking away her vision.
WAVE
A man saying her name, making the screaming louder.
WAVE WAVE WAVE
The water keeps hitting her so hard it is even taking him away. Her anchor. Even touching their finger isn't enough to ground her. The world starts moving, and she can feel her body start swaying.
She is going to hit the bottom. The floor.
She has to find leverage against something with how hard she is being hit.
Making it impossible to feel any control.
Strong hands grab her forearms, and pull her back into a chest. "Gin, just stay up. You got this. Look down at your shoes. Just stare at your shoes. It helps, trust me."
Ron moves them both forward, never letting go of her. The crowd sounds far away, but directly on top of her at the same time. They are louder now with his presence. With the man who had killed Voldemort finally in view again.
He releases one hold on her, and hesitantly looks out to the crowd and puts on the fakest smile Ginny has ever seen before, and starts waving out to the people.
He continues to wave and smile as he walks them to the designated area on the stage with the others accepting the rubbish award.
When she stands over her spot labeled with her name, her brother still doesn't let go of her shoulders.
"I got you. I won't let you fall. Just stare at your shoes. It'll be over before you know it."
"Do you stare at your shoes? Is that what gets you through all of these events?" She whispers while at the same time doing exactly what he told her to do. She notices one is untied.
Teddy...
"Yeah. I can tell you every detail about my shoes, down to the number of stitches, different shades of colors, and where they are. I try to remember what caused certain scuffs and tears to keep my mind busy."
She looks over her shoes and notices a mark as someone casts a voice amplifying spell.
"Thank you for joining us to celebrate these heroes, and the ones no longer with us..."
Her shoes don't have too many imperfections on them. They are newer. She bought them from the catalogs Teddy handed her.
At the time, she honestly thought he was joking. He couldn't have been serious that he would buy anything she circled.
"... These are only handed out to those who have shown the ultimate forms of bravery..."
Then the 32 owls arrived, and she was the new owner of many pieces of clothing that had been a joke to circle, including these shoes.
They were ridiculously expensive. Her parents' entire budget for clothing for all of their children was less than the price tag on just this pair of shoes.
"... The third and secret weapon of the Golden Trio. The man who is responsible for killing Voldemort, Ronald Weasley..."
"Keep looking at your shoes..." He whispers, and she nods her head as his strong arm lets go, and she is left to stand alone.
The shoes came in the first owl package. She had been enjoying the warmth, and simple luxury of a hot, well pressured shower. Something she hadn't experienced in a long time. Smelling all of the bars of soaps, and bottles shelved on the sides. She picked up the purple one and breathed in. That one was definitely Hermione's. She picked up the one next to it, and the ferret's weird minty smell made her pull away and cough. The last one she smelled. That one had to be Theo's. It didn't have a certain scent really. Nothing she could place a name on rather than clean. Simple. It fit him. She decided to use that one for herself.
She remembers watching the bubbles slide down her skin, taking away the grime that she tried to clean as best she could in the safe house shitholes, when she heard a knock at the door.
"Come in."
A pause.
"Ugh, it... it's Theo."
"Okay, come in."
Another pause.
"But... you are in the shower."
"Sure am, and it feels fucking amazing. I used your soap by the way. Hope that's okay."
"My bar of soap was all over... your skin?"
Oh damn it, she probably shouldn't have done that. Hermione had already told her about his aversion to touch, and his boundaries around things.
"Yeah, sorry about that. I should have asked before. I'll toss this one, and buy you a new one if it is a problem. Just let me..."
"No! Uh... I mean, no. It isn't a problem. You can use it if you want, and you aren't paying for shit. Not with that save the world salary The Order provides." She hears a loud thud outside the door. "I came to let you know an owl delivered your first purchase. It also brought a timetable of all the other deliveries on their way. If the owls shit in my library, you are cleaning it up."
She stopped rubbing the soap out of her hair.
"Wait what? Teddy, that... that was a joke. I have clothes. You really didn't buy me all those things I circled, did you?"
Ginny could hear his muffled voice, but had trouble putting the words together over the water and through the wooden door.
"Teddy, open the door. I can't hear you."
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because the last time I was in a similar situation, it ended with someone seeing my arse."
She snorted.
"I'll show you mine, if you show me yours." Ginny grimaced at herself as soon as she said it. That wasn't normal for her. Yes she and Dean had been shagging for months, but she didn't flirt with him. She hadn't even had the desire to say anything, or even notice another wizard in an admirable way since Harry.
But the bloke on the other side of the door was fucking fit. She couldn't stop herself from noticing him. At first she had categorized him in the same realm as the ferret. Fit, yet a prick and the enemy.
Then she watched him carefully during the first time they met in person. Watching him care for Hermione. Taking in the gentle voice, the hesitant actions, the eyes that moved all over her and the room, trying to solve the problem. Trying to end the confrontation. But it all scared him. She scared him. That became evident when she had made an attempt for her wand, and he had visibly shook as she tried.
She realized quickly the bloke wasn't dangerous. That was easy to see.
And all of the other assumptions about him started falling away quickly one after the other as she continued to take him in.
"... Mr. Weasley will also be accepting on behalf of Ms. Hermione Granger, who as we all know, is still battling for her health under the watchful care of St. Mungo healers..."
She reached for the handle, turning the water off, and stepped out of the shower.
"Sorry Teddy, just a joke."
She heard a noise from the other side of the door as she wrapped a towel around herself.
"Seems like you are full of them. Like I said before, you are going to fit in well here."
She smiled, and pulled on her worn shirt and holes in the knees trousers before opening the door to find him still standing there with a large box on the floor in between them.
"I think they are shoes."
She bent down, and opened the package to see the truly hideous pair of very not her shoes. She couldn't stop herself from laughing at the sight.
"What is so funny?"
"Bloody hell, Teddy, I circled these to be funny. Because I didn't actually think you would take all that sugar daddy nonsense seriously. Look at them! They are the ugliest things I have ever seen!"
She held the way too heavy to actually be shoes in between them, and she watched the side of his mouth go up into that half smile of his, and she felt her stomach flip at the sight.
Blimey Ginny, stop thinking with your cunt. The man in front of you would not be down to shag for distraction.
"Well they cost almost as much as my first edition Hogwarts: A History so you better wear them! That is your own damn fault for circling what you did."
The other side of his mouth went up as she laughed harder at his statement.
"Oh fuck fine I will wear them! They better be comfier than they look at least. So you seriously bought everything I circled?"
He nodded his head as she bent down, and pulled the ridiculous shoes onto her feet.
"Yes. Now it makes sense why you circled a 12 item brooch set."
She laughed again, raising and walking past him to throw her sleeping clothes she borrowed from Hermione into the pile in the closet. The shoes were far from comfortable. They felt like bricks on her feet, making a horrible rubbing sound as she walked due to the leather against her skin.
She tried adjusting her heel, and walked across the room again. The sound still happened.
"I sound like a squeak toy."
Ginny readjusted again as Theo laughed.
"Even better then. No more of you sneaking around and scaring the shit out of me, and drawing bollocks on my face. I will be able to hear you coming now."
"Well where is the fun in that Teddy?"
"I don't enjoy you scaring me gingersnap."
He moved in front of her, looking down at her right shoe that seemed to be the culprit of the horrible noise.
"Oh don't lie Teddy. We both know you like it."
The tips of his ears redden, and he wouldn't look up at her for a moment before lowering to his knee in front of the shoe.
She pressed down after readjusting once more to hear the damn sound again.
"Well it looks like my favorite new hobby of keeping you on your toes has been ruined by my own. Maybe Hermione will..."
Her voice cut off as she watched Theo's hands reach out, and start untying the laces. Ginny watched his nimble fingers work quickly to untie the strings, making sure not to touch the small area of bare skin between the top of the shoe and her pant leg. She couldn't help but become mesmerized by the movement of his fingers, feeling a very familiar feeling begin to go lower, and lower within herself.
The feeling only grew when he yanked her shoelaces hard, to tighten the leather to her skin. Her body jerked and a noise came out of her mouth before she could stop it at the action.
He didn't seem to notice though. Oblivious to her body's response to him, as he started tying the strings together. Full concentration on fixing her problem.
He pulled hard once more, looping them together again before leaning back and staring at the shoe.
It took her an embarrassingly long time to realize he was waiting for her to take a step.
She finally did what he was waiting for, and was surprised to hear no horrible squeak.
Ginny walked across the room, and then back again to see Teddy's full smile once again splayed across his face.
"You fixed it!"
He nodded his head and pointed down at the shoe. "That type of leather has to be tight on the skin to not make a noise. My pirat... uh... I have a few other items made out of similar leather within my collection, and I have the same problem with them. Just keep them tied tight, and I won't be able to hear you coming next time you try to draw surprisingly accurate anatomy on my face."
He half smiled again at her, and she couldn't help but return one back.
Merlin's saggy left tit... I am in trouble...
"... And last but certainly not least, Ginevra Weasley. The Chosen One's chosen one. Who cut off the snake's head and..."
Her brother nudges her lightly, and she looks up from the untied shoe. The action raises her to the surface again. To the waves and crushing water.
She wants to go back down.
Down to a memory rather than the loop that usually was the only place she could go.
The loop that made her blame herself for everything happening now.
She doesn't know if that is a good sign or not. That she was starting to go to other memories of him, rather than the one of him dying in her arms.
But she doesn't care.
This memory made her smile. Made her feel a bit good for a few moments before the overwhelming sadness kicked back in.
I want to go back to that time with him. Everybody, everything, needs to shut the fuck up, and just.. stop moving, and let me stay in this moment with him.
Just let me stay...
Please, let me stay.
The heavy weight of the award pulls the front of her shirt down as it is attached.
This was all almost over. A couple more minutes and she would be able to get back.
"... Ms. Weasley will also be accepting an Order of Merlin on behalf of the man who gave his everything for our world. Who gave his life so we all could live. For Harry Potter..."
A box is placed in her hands as the speaker continues to weave a tale of lies about Harry. About everything that was technically true but not at the same time.
He had killed the final horcrux, himself.
But that hadn't taken place days ago, that had happened months ago.
He was gone.
Long gone.
But now she is being forced to carry another fucking thing for him.
And it is heavy.
And hard.
She looks back down to her untied shoe.
I'm not doing this anymore... I can't.
I need to get back.
Ginny turns as her eyes begin to water.
They can't fall. She can't add anymore water, she is too close to sinking already.
She needs to get out of here.
Not caring about the rest of the fucking award ceremony, or the yell from her brother, or the flashes of cameras, or more than likely one of her parents trying to catch up to her.
She starts running faster, skipping the steps and moving towards the exit to apparate.
The sky is becoming different shades of color already. She is late. Later than what they had talked about.
He better fucking be there... or at least answer his damn galleon this time.
As soon as she is able, she apparates back into the entryway of St. Mungo's and climbs the stairs quickly.
She has the place memorized at this point. Knowing exactly the route she needs to go that will bring her to the deserted waiting room.
Well, what was usually a deserted waiting room.
As she turns around the corner, she sees that some of the press have already made their way here.
"Shit..." She whispers under her breath, and opens the door to a storage closet to hide in before they see her.
There was no way Malfoy was waiting for her in that room full of people. And she hadn't seen him in the hallway.
Ginny pulls out her galleon, and sends a message letting him know where she is.
Her hand goes up to rub the skin of her chest, but it knocks against the piece of metal strapped to her shirt.
Fuck this...
She pulls forward hard, and doesn't care as the fabric rips and the honor is taken off of her.
She doesn't deserve to be honored.
Her honored actions are what placed Theo here, on the fourth floor.
How could she ever be proud of that?
She sticks the piece of metal into her pocket, as the door to the storage room abruptly opens a crack. She sees nothing, but hears the sound of someone shuffling into the closet, as the door shuts again.
Malfoy's signature blonde hair appears as he pulls the cloak off, and gives her a quick nod. "There are a few already congregating outside the entry doors to her hallway. The fourth floor is probably going to be a bloody crowd with his body being there."
She reaches for her cloak, and rips it out of his hands. "I don't care. I need to be with him. Especially after what I just had to partake in. The story they are weaving is..."
"Is making your side sound fucking perfect? Yeah I read the paper today."
She shakes her head in agreement, as she looks up at him. He also looks like shit. His perfect and stoic demeanor had been chipping away slowly as the hours turned into days.
As Hermione continued to struggle.
"How is she? Did you talk to her at all today?"
Malfoy lets out a yawn he is trying to hold in as he runs his hand over his face. "A bit this evening after the healers did their rounds. She... she wasn't scared of me, but she didn't remember any of the other times we had talked over the last few days. And still doesn't seem to know what is real. But, she, she doesn't seem to hate me."
Ginny and Malfoy had been living underneath the invisibility cloak over the past five days. Taking turns going from the second floor to the fourth.
"Are you coming with me or..."
"No. The mind healer I called is meeting to discuss what he found this morning."
"But we were there for it, Malfoy. You know he said he has never seen a case with as much mind interference before, and how..."
"I don't need to be reminded." His voice is sharp and harsh as he meets her eyes. Other people may find him intimidating but not her.
Even after Order members went to Dolohov's home and came back with the stories of what they had found, he didn't scare her.
If she was in that position, honestly, she probably would have done the same.
"I just... need to know. Need to know what I can do. What they can possibly do to help her."
Ginny nods her head in understanding and throws on the cloak. He watches her for a moment, mouth opening, and then closing again. Contemplating if what he is thinking should be said out loud. She already knows what is about to come.
"Red, I think you shouldn't go up there. Not while..."
"I will do whatever the fuck I want prick."
She pushes past him as he scoffs.
"Fine bitch. Pay attention to your galleon. I should be back soon."
She salutes him with her middle finger before disappearing under the cloak. The hallways are much busier than normal. Probably calling in more staff for the press and Order members currently on their way. She should probably slow down, not be running, being more careful, but she can't. The heavy box in her pocket, the loop of mistakes starting to play again in her mind are becoming too much. Only one thing helped.
Only one thing gave her some semblance of peace, of hope.
The secured fourth floor door finally opens, and she follows a group of healers in. She notices the time on one of the clocks as she follows them.
She doesn't have much time.
Ginny moves around the group of healers, and turns the corner but stops.
The hallway is full.
Well, actually one small area in front of one closed door is full.
People are fighting and pushing against one another to try and get the best shot of the famous name on the door. Indicating whose body was being held in the room until their burial.
Of course this is the only way to get to the room she needs to be in.
She presses herself against the back wall, and moves slowly around the crowd. Past three doors with names she doesn't recognize.
Then by two she does. A couple photographers are taking snapshots of the doors marked Katie Bell and Lee Jordan. Both set to be buried today.
But most of them are not moving from the door marked with his name. Even though he was not being moved to be buried today.
She should have thanked Ron for that. For demanding that his burial not be a public event.
That moment belongs to the few of us.
He deserves for it to be only the few of us.
And Hermione deserves a chance to be there.
She gives the name of the man she loves a quick glance before moving past it. She has no desire to stay there anymore.
She turns the corner into a new hallway that is completely deserted. No one is here to take pictures of his door. No one even knows his name in association to the war and the victory.
Forgotten by all, but her.
She moves in front of the third door and places her hand on the knob. It is shaking already. Wet with perspiration, as she checks to make sure the hallway is still empty.
Please, Please, Please...
Ginny gulps loudly, and squeezes her eyes shut before turning the doorknob and sliding into the room quickly.
She presses her back into the door, as she is finally with him, where she belongs.
Finally here again.
Sinking deeper, and deeper.
She lifts her gaze to see the man laying in the bed in the center of the room.
Green eyes still closed.
Half smile gone.
Brown curly waves pushed to the side of his face.
"Hi, Teddy."
She is so fucking sick of doing this.
Of history repeating itself.
Ginny quickly walks over, and doesn't hesitate before crawling up into the bed with him.
Her eyes that had been trying to hold in the tears finally burst as she rests her head onto his chest, and places her hand back into his. Intertwining their fingers.
She presses her ear into his chest, and tries to hold back the sobs wanting to escape her throat.
She has to be able to hear.
Come on, please, please, come on...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
Thank Merlin...
You are still fighting.
The tears and noises start coming. She doesn't try to stop them anymore, but does try to keep her crying softer than what her body naturally wants to unleash.
Because she needs to be able to hear his heart beating.
That noise has to be heard.
She had gone too long without it's reassuring rhythm. Everytime she was forced to leave she was convinced when she came back the noise would be gone.
It happened before. With Harry. One minute his heart was beating, and then when she was looking away, distracted by the world around her, it stopped.
She wasn't going to make that mistake again. Not with Theo.
"I missed you."
She moves her head up to place a quick kiss against his lips before pressing the side of her face into his chest again, trying to angle it to be able to look at him and be able to hear the best sound in the world at the same time.
"I have had a shit day Teddy. You and Hermione would be furious over the lies they are spreading about the way this damn war ended, and about how they are trying to cover things up. I am starting to question the accuracy of any depictions of previous wars, and even history in general."
Ginny rubs her fingers up and down his hand in hers. She notices the tray of food to the left. Food he of course hasn't touched. His eyes have been closed ever since the battle. Never waking up.
The stupid fucking house elf did the bare minimum to keep him alive, as was his orders from Theo's father.
But Ginny knows she should be grateful. Grateful for the nasty creature's assistance in stopping the bleeding. For at least keeping him alive until Malfoy showed up and had healers transport him here.
"So trust me when I say, whatever you paid for your first edition Hogwarts a History was too much. Probably more of a rip off than these damn shoes."
She wipes the tears off her face with her free hand, and looks back over to the tray. Noticing the object that needs to go.
She pulls out her wand and makes the fork disappear.
Just in case he did wake up.
'It is up to him now.' Is what the healers continued to say. They tried to take him out of the coma multiple times over the past couple of days, but every time they did his vitals would shoot up or down to dire levels.
Due to all the damage.
The damage that can be seen all over him now.
She knew it must have been bad, if he always made sure to have a disillusionment charm over his whole body. The few stories he shared about his horrendous childhood made it understandable why he chose to do it.
But now, actually seeing it.
Seeing the history of abuse on display...
She was laying in the exact same spot as she is now when the charm had worn off.
Her mind going through the loop of him on the floor bleeding out over, and over again.
Trying to pick it apart.
Trying to find where she could have done more, made a better decision, stopped his body from getting to the dire place it was in now.
Ginny looked up to say something to him, but gasped loudly at the sight of his face.
Scarred, burned, broken in so many places.
They were everywhere.
Her eyes traveled down, and pulled back the gown. She had to cover her mouth to hold in the scream as she saw all the ruined, painful looking skin.
It took up most of him.
Most of her sweet, caring, hilarious man.
She is glad now that she had seen it for the first time when he was unconscious. That he hadn't witnessed her horrible reaction.
Now looking at him, it only made her eyes water.
Not out of shock, but out of the realization of how in pain Theo always must have been.
No wonder hangovers didn't seem to affect him. Or cutting off his damn pinky had seemed so normal.
"I know the healers said it is up to you now. So can you do me a favor Teddy? Can you please come back? I don't care how much of you is able to come, just that you are still here with me okay? That is all I need."
She tries to shove her wand back into her pocket, but the damn piece of metal is in the way. Ginny reaches into her pocket and pulls out the award she doesn't care about at all.
"Look what I got today." She holds it out in front of his closed eyes. Being ridiculous once again. "Hideous isn't it? You'd think they would give me something cooler than this for saving the wizarding world. Like the best broom on the market, or money, or even a years worth supply of chocolate frogs. All would be better than this eye sore in my opinion."
She sits up a bit to dig into her other pocket and pull out the box.
Theo and Malfoy wouldn't be getting one. Not with the way the story was being told.
But the man she is laying on deserves one.
He gave up so many pieces of himself for The Order.
His body.
His safe place.
His comfort.
He kept them all alive on multiple occasions. Had decided to be brave and do whatever was necessary to save Hermione, even before he knew the girl in the left room was her.
Theo is the real hero of this story.
He is a good man.
No, he is a great man.
She places the box onto his chest and opens the lid.
"This one is yours. You will probably love it though. It is very grand, and made with the purest materials I believe. Plus they are rare. Did you know they have made less than 100? Out of the literal millions of wizards and witches in the world, less than 100 have received this honor. So I think it should be on display on top of the fireplace too with the rest of your most prized possessions."
She smiles as she imagines the layers upon layers of charms the adorable wizard would place over the object to protect it. How he would never talk about the personal honor and sacrifice associated with the award, but would more than likely go off about the process of creation, the history of how they came to be, and also the people behind such a magnificent artifact.
"I personally think the whole thing is all rubbish. I can think of 100 names just from this war that deserve the same recognition. And I am sure if you talked to others, you would find that most people sacrificed in some way or another to keep breathing today. Who are we to pick just a few names to shove into the spotlight you know? It is all just propaganda shit. Picking the people with the best stories, and well known names. But what about the other names that aren't well known? How about the three names on the doors down the hall I didn't know, that no one was taking pictures of. They gave their entire lives. But because their name isn't Harry Potter, there is no one standing in front of their doors."
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
Ginny closes her eyes, and sinks deeper and deeper until her entire world is this noise again. Laying in bed once again with a body. But at least this one was still beating.
She can't leave this place they both are. Just beating. Waiting. Replaying the loop, and hating herself more and more each time.
"I can't move from this moment with you. I see the things happening around me and I know. I know they are wrong. I know people expect me to be doing something about it. But I don't have it in me to be her. I am not her right now. I am not even there. I am not there in the present. I am here. With your hand in mine, and your heart beating under my ear. No matter where I am forced to go. This... you... me. I know I will never move past it. So not to play the guilt card, but you better wake up fucking soon okay?"
She moves to kiss the bottom of his scarred chin when the sound of someone twisting the doorknob has her raising off of him.
Damn it, the healers are early...
She clumsily tries to place the cloak over her, and falls off the bed onto the floor as the door opens quickly to show the bleached ferret.
"Bloody hell! Ouch! What the fuck Malfoy? I didn't feel my galleon go off at..."
"The entire staff is distracted by the press and Disorder currently as they move the bodies. No one is paying attention to the rest of this floor."
Malfoy holds out his hand, and helps her off the floor to sit on the edge of Theo's bed.
"What did the most expensive mind healer in the wizarding world have to say?"
She moves to curl her body back around his, and joins their hands again as Malfoy sits down in the chair facing them.
"He is hopeful."
She smiles, as she moves a strand of his hair again.
"You hear that Teddy? The mind healer thinks Hermione is going to be okay. We have been sneaking into her room too. She is way more hospitable than you though. She at least graces us with a conversation every now and again. And even shares her pudding, and..."
"Red, why the fuck do you do this?"
"For the same reason you do this with Hermione. Just in case he can hear."
Malfoy scoffs, and creates a diagnostic charm over his best friend's body.
"They have him in a coma. He can't hear anything."
"How do you know that?"
She rubs her finger over his missing piece, and brings his hand up to her mouth to kiss it lightly.
"Does anyone really know what happens when we are that close to death or when we are placed in a comatose state? What if it is more than just blank in his mind right now? What if he can hear us, and feel my hand in his? Holding on like he asked me to."
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
"What if he can hear and feel it all? What if these little things, are the actions I can actually fucking do to help instead of hurt? If there is a possible chance it does, then I am doing it. So place a silencing charm around yourself if you don't want to hear."
Malfoy doesn't say anything back to her after that. All he does is let out a deep breath and allow his head to fall back against the chair as he closes his eyes. She does the same. Getting lost in the rhythmic and consistent sound of her second chance still beating.
There is still so much living for us to do Teddy.
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
"They will be here any minute. We need to move."
She opens her eyes, and nods her head as she raises off of his chest.
Malfoy is grabbing the cloak as she walks over to the corner of the room.
He places it over both of them right before the door opens, and two healers walk in.
"And this is the other new patient you will be taking care of during your next three shifts."
The gasp from the younger healer makes Ginny's hands form into fists at her sides.
He was still one of the most handsome men she has ever seen. Ruined skin and all.
How dare some fucking nobody witch gasp at the sight of her strong wizard.
"What... what happened to him?"
"The poor man has lived a very sad life it seems. Most of what you see is very old. He came in after the battle with extreme blood loss that caused damage to multiple vital organs. If it had been just that, he would be awake and possibly even discharged by now. Please replace the meal tray. Standard procedure for every patient whether conscious or not."
The younger witch floats the old tray to the other healer, while placing the new meal onto the small table.
"What the..."
"What's wrong?"
"The forks keep disappearing, and I swear every dessert is missing a large part... I sound crazy don't I? Next they will place me on the second floor."
The two healers laugh, as she feels Malfoy's body tense next to her.
"Many of these old wounds were not healed correctly or fully. The amount of scar tissue on his joints must have had him in pain every day of his life. But unfortunately, when the curse hit him, it also caused a lot of these old half healed injuries, to not only become injured again, but even start to deteriorate. It has been a long and complex process to heal everything. And the poor man goes into shock every time we take him out of the coma."
The older healer waves her wand and they both look over the diagnostic charm for a few minutes before speaking. The witch nods her head at the yellow color taking up most of the chart.
"Still not exactly where we would like to see him, but let's try again. His vitals are the best they have been since he was brought in."
Ginny's hand reaches for Malfoy's next to her before she even thinks about it. They were about to try and wake him up.
Again.
The only other time she had been present for this had been a loud and quick and full of flashing red lights experience that had left her body shaking for hours after it happened.
The moment convinced her that this may be all she is left with of her Teddy.
A body breathing, beating, but not living. Just because a body is breathing, doesn't make it alive.
It can't happen again.
None of this can happen again.
Please Theo. Please. You are the strongest person I have ever known...
The healer pulls out her wand, and Ginny watches as time starts to slow again as she waves it over him.
She waits.
And waits.
And waits.
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
But there are no flashing lights.
No loud noises.
There is nothi...
"Sh...it..."
A cool hand is covering her mouth to hold in the sob, and the other hand that had been in hers, lets go to hold her up as the four letter word leaves his mouth.
His mouth.
Theo's mouth.
Her Theo's mouth.
Yesyesyesyesyes!
Thankyouthankyou, dear Merlin thank you.
She wants to run to him. Everything in her starts shaking with the need to touch him, to be with him. To let him know she is here.
His eyes starts to open, but squeeze shut as they adjust to the bright lights of the room. A coarse, dry cough follows the broken and raspy curse word that had left his mouth. His chest convulses up and down with each painful noise, making his eyes squeeze even harder.
One of the witches holds a cup to his mouth, and Theo takes a small sip after the cough breaks.
"Gi..."
He begins to cough again, and the witch offers him another sip.
"Gine..."
Another cough, another sip.
"Ginevra..."
The hand over her mouth presses painfully into her face.
"Mr. Nott, how are you feeling?"
Ginny watches him slowly open his eyes again, and blink a few times. He starts to turn his head before wincing slightly, and stopping the action.
"Where... am I? What, What happened?"
His voice still doesn't sound like his. The younger healer tips the rest of the cup of water into his mouth, and moves to grab the full pitcher off of the small table with the tray of food.
Theo tries to move his head again, but huffs in frustration. The pain seems to make something in him connect as Ginny sees his eyes open wide, and start moving about the room rapidly. Putting something together.
"Ginevra, Ginevra Weasley. And...Hermione Granger. And Draco Malfoy. Where are they? Are they okay? Where am I? What the fuck happened?"
He tries to move his neck again, but the healer closest to the bed reaches out with the purpose of touching the side of his face to stop his attempts.
Malfoy's hands tighten around her to hold her back.
No! No! Don't touch him! You have to ask first!
As soon as the foreign and stranger to him skin makes contact he changes. The diagnostic charm starts to flash in an area, and all of the numbers start going up.
Theo tries to get away from the contact, but his entire body still deep within the healing process does not allow for it.
"Please, please don't touch me. I... don't like being touched."
The witch seems to put the pieces together as her eyes look over the charm and then down at some of the most gruesome of scars. Theo notices too and turns his eyes to the skin he can see.
"Shit... my disillusionment... wait, I'm in St. Mungo's aren't I?"
"Yes Mr. Nott, you are. You have been with us for 5 days now. You are currently recovering from..."
"Is Ginevra Weasley here? Is she okay?"
The younger healer seems to recognize her name as she smiles down at him, and readjusts some of his covers. Being cautious not to make contact with his body.
"You mean Ginny Weasley? Harry Potter's girlfriend? She isn't here. She actually was just awarded an Order of Merlin a few hours ago. She didn't suffer from any injuries after the battle, but she did seem to be grieving from what I saw of the ceremony. Ran off the stage as soon as Harry Potter's award was placed in her..."
"Hermione Granger? Is she... is she okay? And Draco Malfoy?"
The older healer places vials upon vials in front of him.
"Well Draco Malfoy has been a pain in the arse the last week to all who work here. But he is in good health. Hermione Granger is currently being treated for mental trauma on the second floor. She is still in critical condition, but she will live."
Ginny watches Theo's eyes dart back and forth as he is taking in all the information. The older witch holds up a vial towards his mouth, and Theo looks down over the line in front of him.
"No, this is all wrong. Dupplewood serum has been proven to counteract the helpful benefits of Dittany. You shouldn't be giving me both at the same time."
Both witches stare down at him, as he tries to nod his head towards the ceiling.
"Also you better not have this same lighting on the second floor where Hermione is. The 17th rewrite of Healing The Mind With Magic specifically states with proven research that this lighting can cause severe headaches for patients."
Ginny can't stop the light laugh that escapes between her tears. Unfortunately, Malfoy's hand had become relaxed against her mouth to the point that the small noise is heard through his hand. Both of them freeze as the tiny noise escapes their hidden area.
Oh fuck.
Theo blinks, and moves his eyes over to the corner of the room where they are standing, but the two healers don't seem to notice.
The younger witch lets out a huff as she pours him some water into a cup.
"Great. You are going to be a pain in the arse too aren't you?"
"Mr. Nott, please open your mouth. These potions will help with the pain, and internal healing still taking place. I honestly am not even sure how you are speaking through it currently."
"I've felt worse."
He does as is asked. Even downing the potion he was against. Never taking his eyes off the corner.
Off of where they are. Did he hear them?
"Can you have Ginevra Weasley come visit me?"
"No Mr. Nott. Only family is allowed to visit."
"She is my family."
The hand over her mouth presses harder just in time.
"Only blood relatives or spouses Mr. Nott."
Theo scoffs as much as he can and rolls his eyes.
"Well that is a shit policy if I ever heard one. The patient should be allowed to choose who can and cannot visit them. Because family is more than blood. Fuck, my only blood relative is the one who did all this. So you're telling me he can walk in here, but not my wicked witch?"
The older healer waves her wand, and makes the chart disappear as she tries to hold in her annoyance horribly.
"Well after you have made a full recovery, sounds like you should apply to work here Mr. Nott. Since you have so many ideas on how we can do our jobs better."
Try running this whole fucking place witch.
Try changing the face of magical healing.
He will be your boss in four years. He will.
"Can you leave now? I feel okay."
"Yes, we will leave you to rest. If you need help eating, or with anything else, please alert us by the button on the arm rail. It is great to see you awake and able to speak sir. We will be back in two hours to check on you again."
The two witches start moving to the door.
Slowly.
Slowly.
Too fucking slowly.
This moment needs to go faster.
But then, as the door shuts, and Malfoy's hand leaves her face, and Theo continues to look over to their corner, she doesn't move.
She can't move.
I... I don't want to break this.
I'm afraid somehow, if I move I am going to break all of this again.
And I can't hurt you any...
"Gingersnap, get over here."
The words have everything crashing around her in the best way possible.
Not drowning.
Or sinking.
But finally carrying her forward.
Carrying her towards him.
As he smiles that damn half-smile.
As he doesn't flinch or try to pull back from her hands as they finally make contact with him again.
Not just his body.
Not almost him.
But her Teddy.
Awake, alive.
She doesn't have any control over the noises leaving her, or the tears wetting his blanket as she presses her head into his chest again.
"You're back. You're really back, with me. I don't... I don't have to carry all of you too." Her sentence doesn't make any sense, but as she reaches for his hand, and he gently squeezes hers as she slides their fingers through one another, she knows it doesn't matter. She knows he understands.
"I promised I would fight for our second chance."
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...
BUMBUM...