𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 [𝐑. 𝐋𝐮𝐩𝐢𝐧]

𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒

Song:
Cinnamon Girl (Lana Del Rey)
"Like if you hold me without hurting me, you'll be the first who ever did..."

A/N: Drug use (it's a magical drug though), proceed with caution if it's a sensitive topic.

Antonia and Callisto were preparing for the "party" in Lily's dorm, after being threatened by the redhead that even though it was something casual, being underdressed was unacceptable. Lily and Antonia were matching, both their dresses being a baby pink color with intricate sleeves, while Callisto had refused to dress up and had put on her pajamas.

"You look like an uncle."

"Is your aunt hot?"

"No comment." Lily gave up, turning to look at Antonia who was putting on the pair of gloves Callisto had given her. Her nails were too short from constantly biting them when her hands were uncovered, and her thumbs were covered with beige bandages. "Nice gloves, Antonia."

"Thank you." The brunette smiled, changing the bandage on her thumb. "They help with nail biting."

"You should try one of those potions that make the skin taste horrible." The redhead proposed. "They really helped back in fifth year."

Callisto shrugged, "I just threatened Nicholas that I'd blast his fingers off if he continued doing it."

"What is it like in your brain?" Lily mumbled, looking positively disturbed.

"I'm assuming it's wet." Callisto answered. "Rather soft, and it probably smells weird. Oh, quite textured too."

"Usually I have a lot to say to you but right now I just want to kill you. Hope you have sorted your will out."

"As a matter of fact, I have." Callisto bragged. "And everything goes to my nonexistent child, because I'm an asshole and you're not getting anything from me."

"Can I be your child?" Antonia asked, raising an eyebrow. "I can eat and cry."

"No."

Antonia shrugged, "I tried."

The three girls slipped out of Lily's dorm, earning quizzical looks from the few students sitting in the Common Room as they went up the staircase leading to the boys' dormitories and walked to the far end of the corridor. Outside the door there was a small sign with the boys' names, stuck crookedly on the center. Callisto knocked on it and it opened, revealing a smiling Peter.

"Hello, handsome!" Lily greeted, ruffling his hair as they all got inside. Remus was finishing one of his essays while eating a bar of chocolate and Sirius was going through a box of disks, looking at them with immense concentration. Nicholas and James seemed to be in a heated argument about which Quidditch team was the best, with James refusing to acknowledge that the Bulgarian's win in the previous World Cup was fair.

"Not my fault if the Irish play like the broomstick is up their ass, Potter."

"At least the Irish get some action, Lawson."

"Eh, the Bulgarians get quite some action as well." Callisto chimed in, clearing her throat as everyone turned to look at her. "Or so I've heard..."

"Oh right!" Antonia chimed in, her eyes lighting up. "I had forgotten about that..."

"I haven't." Nicholas grumpily mumbled. "You know what, Potter; the Bulgarians do suck."

"Thank you!" James exclaimed, letting the empty bottle he was holding down loudly. "Now, I was promised a potion!"

"You don't necessarily have to drink it." Callisto said, pulling out a big vial from her pocket and setting it on the nightstand. "Depends on how you want it to hit you."

Remus lifted the bottle, observing the color under the light, "You didn't put the beans."

Callisto turned to him, seemingly impressed at the observation, "Turns out the tutoring did pay off."

Remus just shrugged, opening the cap and taking a small whiff. It smelt like normal amortentia, but the scents of smoke, perfume and coconut seemed to be a bit fainter. A hand was placed right on top of the vial, stopping the smoke from coming out.

"Sharing is caring, Lupin." She teased, putting the lid back on. By now, Sirius had picked out a disk and had put it in the worn down player they had found in the confiscated items in Filch's office. Remus was rather content at the choice of music, the sound of David Bowies' voice filling the room.

"So, who's going first?" Lily asked excitedly, eyeing the vial. Sirius snickered slightly at her reaction, turning to get the vial from Remus' hand as if he was the only obvious option.

"Me, of course." He stated, his confidence faltering as he eyed the substance. "So, bottoms up?"

Nicholas smirked, "Sure, if you want to end up puking your guts out."

"Give it here." Callisto ordered, waving her wand. A series of small white cups appeared on the floor and she opened the vial, pouring a few drops in each cup. Sirius didn't look all that convinced about the quantity of the potion, eyeing his cup suspiciously.

"And this will be enough?" Peter asked, voicing the boy's thoughts.

"Yes." She stated, pouring herself half a cup. Remus caught notice of the sadness in Nicholas' and Antonia's eyes at the amount of the potion in her cup, while James looked downright concerned.

"Isn't that a bit too much?" He asked, his eyebrows furrowing. "You just said-"

"I'm not gonna drink it, Jace." She rolled her eyes. "Check this out."

She muttered a spell, droplets of the potion concentrating together in small clumps. Smoke started to come out of the cup, rising in the air in small spirals and Callisto waved her hand over the cup, dispersing the smoke around. What was left behind was a blue green powder that vaguely reminded Remus of tobacco.

"I don't really react well to drinking it." She explained, swirling the smoke amortentia around before she neatly spread it on a piece of rolling paper. Remus couldn't help but focus on her fingers as she delicately rolled the paper, her painted fingernails contrasting the blue color seeping through the semi-transparent paper. She pulled out the same pink lighter he had seen her use many times and lit the cigarette on fire, placing it between her lips.

"Bottoms up!" She smiled, blowing out a bit of cyan colored smoke.

Lily was the first one to react to it, letting out a small giggle as she brought her knees closer to herself and steadied her chin on her hands. The whites of her eyes had an almost unnoticeable blue hue, contrasting with the bright green emerald color of her irises.

James had somehow become even more talkative than usual, holding two discussions separately, one with Peter who was rambling on about a girl he had met and another with Lily who seemed very interested in learning all about hair products all of a sudden. Sirius and Antonia were just humming along to the music, her legs rested on the bed and her head on the floor, as she stared at her fingers.

"She's lovely." Peter said with a lovesick smile. "Very pretty hair and smile, you know? She said mine is contagious, can you believe that? Maybe getting braces wasn't that bad of an idea after all..."

"When are we meeting her?" James asked, biting into a chocolate frog. "Now? How about now?"

"At some point." Peter vaguely mumbled. "She's an angel..."

"Can I have some of yours?" Remus asked, pointing at Callisto's cigarette. "I wanna see what it tastes like."

Callisto nodded and inhaled some of the smoke, gently placing her palm on Remus' cheek as she leaned closer to him. He parted his lips lightly, tasting her cherry chapstick as she blew the smoke into his mouth, the aftertaste of cherries and chocolate on his tongue.

"Cherries and chocolate." He mumbled, as she pulled away.

"I can make you one if you want."

"I'd rather have it like that." He admitted, smiling. He had been way bolder those past few days, something which Callisto had thought she'd never get to see. It was nice, getting to know that aspect of him. It was new and made him appear even more attractive in her eyes.

"Have some pity on our friends, love." She chuckled, averting her gaze to the group.

"Prongs has been rambling about Lily for seven years now." Remus justified. "I think they'll survive."

Callisto seemed to think about it for a second, a mischievous smile on her lips, "Okay, how about we go for a walk?"

He smiled, "Sure."

"Oi, are you two off to fuck again?" Sirius asked as Callisto and Remus got up. "Excuse my French."

James' nose scrunched up, "I thought that was English..."

"We're off for a walk." Remus answered, his pinky joined with Callisto's.

"Careful not to be seen, Callie." Nicholas warned, leaning back on the bed. "Don't ruin this."

"We'll go outside."

~ ~ ~

The moon was half full, casting a pale silver light in the Black Lake. Callisto and Remus were sitting on the slightly damp grass, the chilly wind making goosebumps erupt on his skin as he mentally cursed himself for not bringing his jacket with him. Callisto handed him a light blue cigarette, watching intently as he placed it between his lips. She lit the pink lighter and placed it under the end of the cigarette, gently pushing the red button down with her finger. A small flame erupted, casting shadows on his face as she lit the cigarette. He seemed even more alluring with the light of the fire making his dark brown eyes even more inviting and expressive. She could see a storm behind them, and even though she knew she could easily drown in them, she still risked it.

"I've never really smoked before that." He admitted. "Once or twice a few years ago, but you seem to share that habit with Sirius."

"Awful habit." She acknowledged, leaning against the tree trunk. "My first one was with Nicholas a year ago. I almost threw up on his shoes."

"He'd probably kill you."

She laughed, the sound of her laughter making Remus' heart skip a beat, "He's very fond of his shoes. Up until third year I'd step on them whenever he pissed me off."

"What happened after that?"

"He hit me with a bludger." She snorted, lifting up her hand and pointing at her pinky. "See how it's kind of crooked? He smashed it into pieces."

"You didn't let it go, did you?" He asked, observing her hand under the moonlight. Her pinky was indeed a bit crooked, two scars running down the base of her finger and reaching the center of her palm. They were faded and not as deep as his own, but the image still felt familiar in his mind.

"I shoved his shoes in the mud." She laughed, shaking her head. "We still bicker like chickens, but not as much as we used to."

She paused for a moment, her mind hazy from the amortentia.

"I mean, we stopped doing that as much after I cursed him." She explained. "I didn't talk to him for two months after it happened. The guilt was too much, you know?"

"Do you still feel guilty?"

"A bit." She admitted, averting her gaze to the lake. "How would you feel if you cursed Sirius? Or Peter? Or James? It's a bit hard to look at DADA differently now. It's stupid, but whenever I study it I can't help but think that if I was better at it, then I'd have been able to resist the curse. It doesn't really help that it's a shitty class."

"He would have made you do it either way, Listo." Remus stated. "That man is your Boggart, for fuck's sake."

"I think he knew." Callisto pondered. "He must have known that I'm full of shit. Probably thought I was using Nicholas, or something stupid like that and that was his punishment."

"Or he's just an asshole." Remus commented, tracing circles over her hand. "Either way, there's no point in overthinking it. What happened wasn't your fault, and I'm sure Nicholas agrees."

"He kept on telling me that for two months, but I just blew him off." She bitterly laughed, inhaling some of the smoke before she blew it out in small ringlets. "Remember when I told you about my condition?"

"Yes."

" And remember Monica? The girl from Hogsmead." Remus nodded, feeling guilt rising in his chest at the reminder of everything he had told her. "I lied to all of you about her. I mean, I had to tell Sirius the truth, or at least part of it, but the rest of you don't know shit. Although, I'm pretty sure Marlene suspected something was up."

Remus didn't say anything.

"I used to date her." She confessed, tugging some grass from the ground. "We started going out two months before I stopped talking to Nicholas, but he was never all that fond of her. That boy may be an ass, but he has one hell of intuition." She laughed. "We knew she was a vampire from day 1, but I didn't think much of it. It's not like I can judge, you know? Anyway, it was very nice at the start, but then I fought with Nicholas and Antonia just didn't understand that I couldn't get past that, so I was alone. Alone with her, but essentially alone. She ehm...she asked to bite me."

"You said yes." Remus completed, meeting her gaze. "Damn that DADA, huh?"

"In my defense, you would have said yes too." She teased, sighing. "At first it was fine, but then it got out of control. Antonia noticed, but she didn't know what was really going on, so she didn't know what to do. I also kind of told her to go fuck herself, so it's understandable. Anyway, I knew something was wrong because I felt very sick, but I was taking my medication and I just didn't bother to check it. Long story short, she had been tampering with my medication because it had vervain in it, and I had to go back to the hospital for a good month again. I always fucking hated that place."

"You know I care for you, right?" He asked all of a sudden, feeling his heart thump violently against his chest at the thought that she could ever be wary of him because of Monica. "Even before, it wasn't just about the sex. It never was just about that."

"I wouldn't have blamed you if it was, Rem." She said. "I mean, at first I thought it was just about the sex, but that was all a bunch of excuses."

"And you know that I don't know what to do with you, right?" He asked again. "I mean, I want you to be mine, but I also don't want to hurt you, and I'm afraid it's inevitable if I do what I want to."

"Then what, Remus?" She questioned, biting her lip. "You're just going to keep me like that, as if that's not going to hurt me at all?"

"It's better than what could happen if we ever got together." He stated, his eyes fixed on the reflection of the moon on the water. "Nicholas asked me if I was serious about you, and I said yes. That's exactly why I don't know what to do."

"Do I get to have a say in this or not?" She asked, her eyes blurring with tears. "Fuck, Remus, do you want to be with me or not?"

"Yes."

"Then be with me!" She shouted, stubbing the cigarette out on the ground. "Stop worrying for one fucking second, because unless you ask me right now to be yours, you're just leading me on. And fuck you, because I don't deserve to be led on by you; not when I'm ready to give you fucking everything!"

"I never asked anything from you."

"No, you just took it." She argued, scoffing. "I've asked you so many fucking times if what you feel for me is real. All those times, you've said yes and yet, we're still having this discussion. I've had my doubts too, but you said that nothing mattered to you as long as you could be with me. Well, I'm done with this shit, so unless you answer me right now, this is over." She paused for a moment, trying to blink back the tears. "Will you be mine, or not?"

Yes.

He wanted to say that and then kiss her like all those times. He wanted to take her out on more than one date and hold her hand in the corridor, even though he hated seeing other couples do it. He wanted to wake up with her by his side and make fun of her, even though he thought she was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen.

But every time he closed his eyes, images of Callisto lying on the ground with blood gushing out of an opened wound at the shape of a bite would fill his mind. Even now, all he could see was her; dead or with a life completely ruined for her. He wished one of the two options would be painless for her, but getting hurt was inevitable. He just hoped that the reason for her hating him wouldn't be because he had turned her into what he was; a monster.

Remus was pretty sure he loved her, and that was exactly why he had to protect her. After all, he had promised to Nicholas that he'd die to keep her safe and right now, he was about to make the ultimate sacrifice to keep his promise.

"No. No, I won't."

Remus hoped one day he'd be able to forget the look in her eyes. He could see the betrayal and pain getting masked by a thin veil of anger that would collapse the moment she was alone in the safety of her dorm.

"Go fuck yourself, Remus."

And with those words she stormed away, unable to keep the tears from flowing freely anymore.

The Game of Hearts had finished with two losers for the first time ever since it was created. But just like any other game, it can turn into a war if the players have what it takes.

And if there are two occasions in which everything is allowed, it is love and war.

An end had been reached, but it was merely the start.

~ ~ ~
This is your daily reminder that this is a slow-burn book and that Remus' issues with his lycanthropy and how his condition affects his relationships with other people (especially Callisto) are not just magically going to go away.
Remus thinks he's doing the right thing, and Callisto is very very stubborn, that's all I have to say.
Stay tuned for the next chapters cause they will be intense :)