We live in a world where a quick Google will tell you the answers, the perspective of others and the history we have not lived. But Google cannot fathom the stories we hold inside, and thus my own stories were born.
-Maya Angelou
~.~
On an average, eight of every ten persons regret their words the moment they leave their lips. This means eight out of ten conversations you had had today, were meaningless. But they end up having meaning at the end of the day, arising misunderstandings, indignation, false hopes, heartbreak and the synonyms are never ending, just like the topic, but so unlike relations.
Ever rewinding the steps of thoughts in the late night hours, we conclude just how many irreplaceable words we let out, barely meaning any.
But now they are there, reverberating in the four walls of one's head, eating them in a silence that's so loud.
Eight out of ten of our conversations didn't had a meaning. But there is always a reason which just can't be reasoned with words unreasonable. Life is such a funny thing, people going around saying things they don't mean, breaking promises they swore never to break and what not. This life is just a cycle which we all at some point wish to pull the breaks off for a while and rest. But the only thing that stops is you, rest everything seems to fly by without sparing a second glance your way. So do not stop.
Time heals people, and people change people. Change is permanent like the wound marks. But healing is life long, never truly making one feel entirely satisfied.
Like melting of chocolate in the mouth as it spreads on our taste buds, but just as we are about to reach the ecstasy of its flavor, it is gone.
That is why Jeongguk prefers deserts when it does not include chocolates in it. But dinner with Jeffery doesn't go without hot chocolate at Pierre's and just like that Jeongguk is left for wanting for more hot chocolate even after it being his third order for the night.
That's the similarity between healing and chocolates. Both are life needs and both hurt. Chocolates always leave you wanting for more, never truly satisfying the soul.
Sliding away the china dish, Jeongguk signals for the waiter to get them their bill and once that thing is dealt with, they take their leave. Jeffery is on a phone call with his girlfriend telling her some pep talk Jeongguk wished he could escape hearing to, but his detective-friend seems not to be bothered with his loudness. With the cell phone still between his ear and shoulder blade, Jeffery slides in the driver seat and roars the engine to life. Jeongguk chooses not to let it bother him as his friend keeps talking whilst driving, so he surfs his not-so-social- social media, not looking at anything in particular. He barely registers the fact that he is supposed to double tap a post in order to like it or is supposed to change his feed content in order to stay updated, but it is just this one thing that he has that social-media account to begin with.
To stalk. As harsh it sounds, it is the reason why half of those people are out there.
And so is he and is not ashamed of it at all. Though his search history includes only of the Wrethmeirs, specifically that to be the one with the name Janice, his searches bring literally nothing to his interest. She doesn't has an account. Not with that name, he concludes.
He sighs in defeat and gives up on his little stalking just as quick as he started and stares ahead into the night sky through the window. He could feel himself drifting off to sleep, his body feeling heavier and Jeffery's loud voice fading away, when his cell phone vibrates in his hands and he jerks up.
Hardly can he see the caller ID when he feels a sudden jolt and his hand smashes with the dashboard, a hard hit on his head sends numbness down his body. That very moment, he regrets not wearing the seatbelt.
His head is numb just the way his rest of the body is. He looks to his right, the air bag has blown out and Jeffery's eyes are closed, blood trailing down his pale face. And now that the loud sound from the car alarm is deafening him, he realizes he must have hit his head for his hearing to temporarily impair. Adrenaline courses through his veins at the highest and he could feel something wetting his shirt collar. It has to be blood, he concludes. As the moment of numbness subsides, he feels an excruciating pain spreading all over his body, from head to toe and he knows, it won't take much longer for everything to go dark as he struggles to keep his eyes open.
They've been hit. Real bad.
He struggles to open the door to his side and after a few painfully-failed attempts he gets away with it. He grabs his throbbing head with his hands and when he struggles to even perform such a simple actions he realizes he might have broken a bone or two. With a limping stature he draws himself around the car, to Jeffery's side in order to open the door but the sight infront him drains away every ounce of energy that has left in his body.
Smoke escaping their car which he couldn't recognize anymore. With it's windshield fractured, bumper touching the ground and blaring alarm filling the deserted road he hesitates to imagine what state Jeffery might be in.
They were hit, that he was sure of, but the culprit must have run away because all he could see in his vicinity was the flickering street lamp illuminating the dark road to minuscule extent and literally not another single vehicle had managed to pass by that damned road till now. He searches for his cell phone to call 911, but couldn't find it, instead, to his consternation his left arm just refuses to move even an inch. With staggering steps he gets to the driver's side of the car and tries opening the door. The continuous horn and abhorrent odor of the fuel and burnt metal fills his nostrils making his throbbing head ache more. The night is going to be a lot more longer.
~*~
"The number you're trying to call is unreachable please try again later. The number you're..."
For the umpteenth time William hung up the call before dialing the same number again, following the similar pattern he had been iterating for an hour now. He'd been trying to reach Minho, his dear brother-in-law but to no avail, the call would just not be made.
"How on earth could you act like that?!" he shouted on the top of his lungs slamming the extortionate glass table with his fist. The action would have made anyone else shudder with fear but this was something Janice was quite used to. She kept reading her book as if William wasn't even there and her placid attitude acted as fuel to William's raging wrath. Crossing the living room with lunging steps he grasped Janice by shoulder bringing her to eye-level with himself. A surprised but muffled shriek escaped her lips, the book falling on the floor with a thud and she cursed under her breath at how the hard bound might have a dent now. The couple's disposition at that moment might make an outsider complain about domestic violence but this was the Wrethmeir mansion. Things were different here.
"Why would you do that?" William seethed in distress, his hot breath fanning her face.
"You don't have to be so aggressive about that!" Said Janice, anger and revulsion obvious in her tone. Pushing him in the chest, she yanked herself away from him, her small physique helping her very little in the process. William was a giant when compared to her, and at times like these she prayed she were not this small. Her cheeks flushed and she could feel the stinging in her eyes as some distant memories flashed before her.
She hated to admit it, but she feared him, specially when things got aggressive. It had been long since he had last raised a hand at her but it can never be long enough to be forgotten or forgiven.
"What is wrong with a kid visiting his grandfather!" she asked rhetorically picking up the book and going towards the wooden case by the North wall, distancing herself away from him.
"Grandfather?!" he says rather dramatically, making Janice roll her eyes. "Can you even hear yourself? Visiting his grandfather, such a bullshit. Don't try to reason me with this 'family' crap."
"William! You don't have to over-react. Plus it is not crap, not like the way the things are over here, in this mansion."
"You didn't ask for my permission before sending Jaden away with Minho." he said pronouncing every syllable with a little to much of pressure, which made Janice writhe.
"That wasn't something I need to take your permission for. And I", she said looking him in the eye,
"don't want to have this conversation anymore." with a lame attempt to mimic William, she went dark.
"I think I need to remind you who is the head of the house and how", he says pointing a finger in her direction "you are supposed to ask your husband before sending away his son to freaking another country Janice Wrethmeir!" he shouts those words walking towards her like a predator marching for its prey.
She takes a deep breath in, balling her hands into fist having enough of her husband. She goes farther down the room, head bowed in frustration. Only when she's a hand away from the fireplace does she turn back facing a cynical-looking William. With his tie and suit jacket gone, standing there in his Dunhill white shirt and black pants which bore wrinkles of the hectic day, he looked disheveled.
His curly locks falling on his forehead, a stubble grown a little too much and whites of his blue eyes, now- red and drooped, made him look older and tired. And on the top of that his nose flaring, as he breathed heavily in anger, the muscles beneath the shirt fabric flexing.
With the surety that she might be able to grab the wood poker from the fireplace in time and aim it at William, just in case he gets a tad bit too aggressive than what she'd be able to deal with, she answers him with a heavy sigh.
"Minho offered to take him away, given the present scenario. This isn't healthy for him," she said referring to the investigation, "and I couldn't decline the little help my brother offered me unlike my husband, who should have come up with this idea earlier if he so much pretends to worry for his son."
Now that, might have gone a little too far, and Janice was prepared to have him show the most animalistic behavior but,
his cell phone ringing diverted their attention.
He seemed to have been waiting for that call, given that how quickly he checked the caller ID, and with a last glare her way, he strode inside, to his office, slamming the door behind him louder than usual .
A heavy sigh escapes her lips, as Janice leans back into the wall. Closing her eyes she just stands there, alone in the small hall infront of William's office. She could hear William's faint voice as he spoke on the phone. Slamming too hard had made the door open back a little bit, but she couldn't make out the words. She feels lucky to have had that conversation over, for now. He'll stay angry for a considerable time but with the investigation going on, she could easily avoid him.
Planning to leave early for university the next day, she retires to her room and calls it a day. Sleep denies to grace her with it's presence even when she lies down in her bed. Her thoughts gets the best of her, as she drifts back into thinking about nothing and everything all at once. She picks up her phone in order to avoid procrastinating and opens the Instagram application. She had come across Anna and Melina's profile few years ago, and luckily none of them had their accounts private. She had now developed a habit of going through the posts of her once-beloved friends. And through their accounts she got across Taehyung's and from his to Jeongguk's.
Stalking wasn't her expertise but it this rate, it was close to being one. He had no posts yet and she wondered if he was ever even active on social media.
Going back to Taehyung's profile, she scrolled down to a particular picture. It was of Jeongguk's, a candid click from Taehyung's wedding. He was in a tux, leaning on the counter, a glass of wine in his hand, and a small but sincere smile adoring his features as he looked at something that wasn't in the picture.
A small burning sensation in her chest makes it's appearance, as the thought of him smiling at another woman, crosses her mind.
It has been long since they were together. He surely would have dated and might even have a family, who knows. Not her, definitely.
But the idea of him with someone else, still stings her.
The idea of him finding an abode in someone else's embrace, still burns her.
Jealousy isn't good and aching for love in the process is worse. But what good and intense comes from a love that has not pained?
In the past eleven years, the mere thought of ever seeing him again had always made her sniff a laugh. But now, that life has once again made their paths cross, she feels petrified.
Petrified, to never see him again.
*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_ :)
A/N:-
i'm ashamed to even call myself an author, with no updates for past two months or more....
but to those who are still hanging on out there, Love you to the moon and back!
I have completed the book's entire plot but i get little motivation to write, idk why, it hurts me but still I am slacking off for reasons even unknown to me. I hope I stay more active from now on, also this book needs ton loads of editing, but again, those who are still here, I owe you a lot. I'm so very grateful to y'all .
Have a nice day.
(p.s. Jk X Janice moments are coming,.,.)
<3