Halstead hadn't been able to make a lot of use of himself at the mall. So many paramedics and cops had been on the scene that those who needed attention were getting it. After helping a few walking wounded out of the building to ambulances, he had stopped to drink a bottle of water, and while doing so he had checked his phone. There had been a text from Lindsay asking him to meet her at the 21st when he could.
Noticing a cop who hadn't seemed to be doing much, Halstead had enlisted the man to give him a ride to the 21st. Now, while they were en route, he made a call to Ruzek, wanting to find out how Burgess was. The call was answered after a couple of rings. It was immediately apparent from the background noise that the call had been answered on speaker in a moving car.
"Hi, Jay," Ruzek said.
"Ruze. How's Kim?"
"Kim's here in the car. You're on speaker. We're heading home now."
Burgess spoke then, sounding a bit vague and drowsy. "I'm okay, Jay. In shock according to Will. He doped me up with something, so all I feel is tired and numb right now. I guess it'll all hit me tomorrow or something."
Halstead didn't really know how to put what he felt into words. He just had to do the best he could in the moment. "Kim, I'm so, so glad you're okay. And I couldn't be prouder or more in awe of you for doing what you did tonight. I can't speak for Erin of course, but I'm sure she'll make sure you get whatever help you need to get through this mentally. And of course, as always, anything you need, I'm only ever a call or a message away."
"Thank you, Jay," Burgess said. It sounded like it was all she was capable of. Just how heroic she had been probably hadn't dawned on her yet. And knowing her as well as he did, Halstead felt sure she wouldn't be seeking the limelight about it either. She probably felt like she had done what a police officer needed to do in the situation in which she had found herself. The truth was different of course. Halstead had personally never known an act of selfless courage like it. No one could tell how many lives had been saved by her quick and decisive actions.
"Yes, thanks, Jay," Ruzek said. "Where are you? At the mall?"
"I was. Er and I went over there. We split up to help people, then I got a message from her to meet her back at the 21st. Not sure why. Just heading back there now. I'm sure she'll call you later to check in, Kim."
"Okay," Burgess said tiredly.
They said their goodbyes, then Halstead ended the call. The timing was good. He was nearly back at the 21st.
Five minutes later, he was walking into Intelligence. There he found Lindsay, who was talking to Sergeant Platt. There was also a young girl wearing a Cubs baseball cap sitting at Kim Burgess's desk. She was looking blankly down at the desk. It didn't take much to piece together that Erin must have found her somewhere at the mall and brought her back to the station. It was also therefore likely that the parents were victims, either dead or in hospital.
Lindsay said something to Platt, then gestured with her head for Halstead to join her in her office. Meanwhile, Platt went over to the girl and started trying to talk her into going to get a soda. On the way past, he tried to make eye contact with the girl, but she didn't look up at him.
"Shut the door, Jay," Erin said when he followed her into the office.
He did so, then noticed that her eyes were full of tears. She was trying to hold herself together and just about managing it. He went to her and took her in his arms, recognising that this was a personal exchange, not a professional one. "What's happened, Er? You find her at the mall?"
"Yes," Erin sniffed, stepping back from him. "Her name is Clementine. She's eleven. I found her in that toy store where I left you. Her parents were behind the counter, both full of bullets and long dead. Clementine had been shoved into the space under the counter and told to stay there by her dad. That's how she managed not to be killed. The sick fuck didn't know she was there."
"Jesus Christ. So her parents were shot to death literally right in front of her."
"Yeah, and she has no family, Jay. No aunts, uncles, cousins, nothing. We're waiting for someone from Child Services to show up. But she's such an absolute sweetheart. And she's totally broken by this, obviously. I don't just want to have them take her and put her through who knows how much more turmoil."
"What are you saying, Er?" he asked, feeling like he knew the answer.
"She feels attachment to me now. She's asked me several times not to leave her. I'm thinking we could take her in."
Jay could totally understand why she was saying that. He felt put on the spot though, unsure what his own opinion on the idea was. In any case, it wasn't as simple as pointing at a kid and saying, 'I want that one.'
"Er, we've not even done any research into adoption yet. All we've done is agree that it's something we want to do. Now you've got a child out there who you want to take home with us. Seems like a massive leap. And it's not that simple anyway. Child Services aren't just going to give her to you because you say you want her. Maybe for a short time they would, but permanently?"
The look on Erin's face hardened. She wasn't happy. "You're trying to talk me out of helping that poor girl. Think about what she's been through, Jay. But that's just it, you can't comprehend it because it's more horrific than anything either of us have ever experienced. And she has no one. No support network, nothing. All she has is me, the person who found her. How could I, how could you, possibly turn away from that?" By the end, she had gone from hard-faced to having tears running down her cheeks.
Clementine's story pulled on Jay's heart strings. He couldn't imagine how it would not have done. And part of his reasoning for wanting to adopt had been to help someone in need. This was so sudden though. "I've just walked in here. Five minutes ago I didn't even know Clementine existed. I haven't met her. And you're wanting me to agree to adopt her. Also, like I said, it doesn't work like that with Child Services."
Lindsay turned away from him and took a moment to try and calm herself down. "Sorry," she said when she looked back at him. "It's been an awful evening for all of us. I came at you too strongly there, you're right. But I do want to take Clementine in, Jay. She has no one, and I cannot walk away from her. We have a bond already that I can't explain to you in a way that would make sense. We just have a bond, and I mean that with my entire soul. Meet her, and see how you feel, please?"
That was fair enough, Jay thought, and her passion touched him. It had been a rough night, and he imagined no one who had been in that mall was thinking straight. The undeniable fact was there was a little girl who had witnessed her parents being murdered, and had nowhere to go and no one to care for her. The more he thought about it, the more he was inclined to agree with Erin that helping was the right thing to do.
"Okay, I'll meet her. I do really feel for the poor kid, trust me, but it's way too soon for us to be talking about adopting her. Maybe we'll be able to have her stay at our place for a few nights. Not going to repeat myself about Child Services again. We can't possibly make plans until we've spoken to them."
"I've been thinking about that. Saw Deputy Superintendent Miller at the mall when I was with Clementine. She said if I needed any help with Child Services I should call her."
Jay gave her a thin smile. "I doubt that's the kind of help she meant."
"I know that," Erin said patiently. "But the fact is she has the clout to make things happen if need be. During my time with the FBI, I became quite good at playing politics."
Knowing Erin as well as he did, Jaw could tell that she had made up her mind about Clementine. Nothing was going to stand in her way. Sometimes that sheer bloody mindedness was one of her least desirable personality traits. It was the side of her that had made her leave for New York and not come back for five years. But she was the love of his life, and he didn't want to change her. Besides, with Clementine she was trying to do a good thing.
"Let me meet Clementine, and we can talk to Child Services when they get here about having her stay with us. Short term, I think they'll go for that. I remember Kim doing it once some time ago, before they had Alex. She looked after a little girl for a couple of weeks."
"Well, there you go," Erin said, happy to hear about that past experience. "Let's go out together. Be aware that she's in shock, obviously. She was talking to me like a kid younger than eleven when I found her in the mall, but she started to come around a little after we got here. Be gentle with her."
"Of course," Jay said. He wished he had some parenting skills, or had taken a more active role in being 'Uncle Jay' to Alex Ruzek. In truth, he didn't feel comfortable finding the right way to talk to kids, never knowing if he was talking below their maturity level and acting like he thought they were stupid, or if he was talking above their maturity level and leaving them with little idea what he was talking about. It was only one of the skills he was going to need to learn if, actually when, they adopted a child. Even more so now that 'when' seemed like it might have come down the road at them much faster than they could have imagined.
Leaving Erin's office, Jay saw that Clementine was back at Kim's desk, now with a can of Fanta in her hand. Platt was sitting at Atwater's desk, keeping her company.
"Thanks, Trudy," Erin said, the unspoken message being that she could leave them to it now.
"You're welcome." Platt got up, seemingly not knowing how to appropriately say goodbye to Clementine. In the end she opted not to say anything. In any case, Clementine's attention was on Jay, looking warily at this new person.
"Hi, Clementine," he ventured. "My name's Jay. I'm Erin's partner."
"Like, her cop partner?" Clementine asked.
"No, uh, I'm her boyfriend."
"Oh. Erin rescued me from the mall."
Already, Jay felt at a loss for something to say to her. 'Yeah, I heard your parents were murdered' was hardly the way to go. "Yes, she just told me about it," he said in his most compassionate voice. "We both want you to know that we're going to make sure you're taken care of."
"Am I going to stay with you?" Clementine asked Erin. She seemed accepting of Jay now, but her attachment was to Erin. That was only natural, he reasoned.
"We're going to have someone come talk to us," Erin said. Jay took note of the tone she used, reassuring, but in what he considered to be a way you would reassure an adult. She was crediting Clementine with maturity, and it looked to be the right approach. "They'll make the decision on if you can stay with Jay and I tonight or not. They'll ask you how you feel about it."
"I want to stay with you," Clementine said without any doubt in her voice.
"Then we'll try to make that happen," Jay promised. At least on a temporary basis, he was willing to commit to it. It would give all three of them a chance to see if the arrangement worked for them. If it did, they could pursue making it permanent.
"Thank you. I don't want to live on the street," Clementine said, and burst into tears.
Jay's heart melted in an instant, and now he knew why Erin felt so strongly about adopting Clementine. She was right. They couldn't turn their back and allow her to be thrown into the awful Child Services system. Standing closer to her than Erin, he was able to get to her first and crouch down to give her a hug.
"You're not going to live on the streets. Neither me or Erin are going to let that happen to you." Not that it would anyway, he thought, but the simple reassurance was what the child needed in the moment.
She responded to him, hugging him tightly. "I'm so scared."
Feeling himself tearing up, Jay could hardly tell her everything was going to be okay. It seemed asinine in the circumstances. "I know. But we're here for you," was all he could say.
A/N: Do you think Jay and Erin should try to adopt Clementine? If they do, will Child Services let them?