Chapter 48
The party was already full-blown when we got to Tiffany's house.
People were gathered around the backyard, drinking alcohol that had been acquired illegally by Tiffany's older brother, or was being taken from her parent's cabinets without permission.
All the guys were celebrating our win, and you could feel everyone's enthusiasm as music blasted outside.
Most people gathered around the bonfire, but some were also in the house.
It was already a little chaotic.
We'd all gone to the party in different cars, so I had no idea where Lexi was right now.
I was pretty sure she was going to come to the party though. She had said she was.
It was a little surprising because usually she skipped the parties. She even fled the ones that happened at her own house when her sister was still around.
I wasn't complaining about having her here tonight. Honestly if it wasn't for the fact that she was going to be there, I might have skipped it with the way my head was pounding.
Suddenly, like my body was wired to spot Lexi Grayson in a crowded place, I spotted her, making her way to the fire. She was looking around her, like she was lost.
I made my way to her.
"Looking for me Pumpkin?" I asked, coming up behind her.
Lexi turned around, smirking at me a little. "Get over yourself."
I laughed. "It's an old one Pumpkin, I'm sure you can come up with something better."
"I have more taste than that?" she offered making a cute face.
"Please, nothing is better than that," I told her and made a swooping motion towards my body.
Sometimes I really wondered where my misplaced confidence came from.
"Stop feeding that big ego of yours," she replied, snorting.
I laughed again, and that was when Alex came up to her, handing her a red plastic cup with booze.
I was proud of myself that I did not glare at Alex.
It was wasted energy.
Lexi had said she didn't love him. I was going to trust her words.
"So Blake, was it Alex's fault that bad move in the beginning, or was it yours?" Lexi asked us.
It was mostly Alex's fault, but I wasn't going to throw him under the bus. We were still a team.
"We don't talk about the game plays with outsiders," Alex told Lexi, kinda chuckling nervously.
"Meaning you dropped it?" Lexi said, smugly.
"Meaning it's both our fault," I replied, still trying not to deliberately undermine her friend. After all, football was a team effort.
"Now, now, if you two suck, then we're not going to win games, I hope you know that?" Lexi warned, and drank from her cup.
I kept the naughty comment I thought about for myself and instead said, "we'll practice."
Clark decided to start screaming for my attention at this moment and because I didn't want him to come over here and annoy Lexi or say something totally uncalled for, like he often did, I reluctantly left Lexi and went to see him.
"What's up?" I asked him.
He already stank like alcohol. "So, who's your target tonight, so I'll know who's already claimed?" he asked me, looking proud of himself.
I raised my head to the sky and whined. "No Clark, just no."
"What?"
"Just... no, to all of this," I said, motioning towards him.
I had no desire or time or energy to deal with whatever that was. Most of my reputation as a fuck boy came because of whatever scenario he invented in his head about me. I wasn't about to keep giving him ammunitions to feed is warped up narrative.
"Wait," he called after me.
"I have no patience with you tonight Clark. You're an awful human being," I just said walking away, not even bothering to look back at his reaction.
I looked around for Lexi again, but she seemed to be busy, chatting with people, so instead I poured myself a glass of water because I felt dehydrated and tried to find a quiet place to hide from everyone.
People were loud and my head was still hurting.
I ended up on the front porch, sitting on the swing while looking at the sky.
The cool air and the quiet moment away from the partying was a welcome pause.
I should have taken medicine for my head.
I hoped the pounding and pain would subdue enough for me to go back inside and potentially annoy Lexi for a bit.
"Drinking alone is boring," a voice said a few feet away.
I turned to it, and smile at my Pumpkin. She found me.
"Good thing I finished my glass," I replied. It hadn't been alcohol, but I didn't want her to worry if I started to explain that I was actually drinking water and not alcohol and why I was doing that.
Lexi headed in my directing and sat beside me on the swing. Her arm brushed against mine.
"Having a fun night?" she asked me with a small smile.
"Not remotely," I admitted, snorting. "You?"
"The guys wanted to get me drunk," Lexi replied with a frown.
I smiled a little at her cute pouting. "Good girl, resist temptation."
"You know, it's weird to think I use to see this as an awful thing, having to spent time with you, and now I practically beg for it," Lexi suddenly said.
Oh, my Pumpkin was a little tipsy, wasn't she? She had to, to say stuff like that out loud.
My heart was pounding faster. "Aw, I'm glad you finally admit your unrequited feelings," I teased her.
I was trying not to read too much into the things she said when under the influence. I had my heart broken enough another time...
"That's so not what I'm doing right now, but nice try Blakey-Boy. Truthfully I was kinda worried when you said I owned you. I didn't want to have to change school like Audrey because you posted our sex-tape on the Internet or something," Lexi was rambling.
I kinda snorted, frowning and amused at the same time.
Audrey? What was she talking about? Wait? "Audrey? The girl that left school in the middle of ninth grade?" I asked.
"Yeah," Lexi replied, her cheeks turning red.
I had never even talked with that girl. I had heard some rumors about why she had changed school though. I didn't know I was apparently one of the reasons why.
"Your sources are wrong Pumpkin. Trust me, there's no chance in hell there's a video that exist of me having sex in ninth grade," I informed her, amused.
Lexi frowned, confused. "The girl with the whip cream?" I asked.
I wasn't sure what she was talking about, but I had never done anything with a girl and whipped cream, so the answer was easy. "Rumor."
"The panties on fire incident in the labs?"
Oh, I knew about that one, it was false, of course, but I had heard about it. "It was a shirt, and I had nothing to do with it."
"Any other stories like that, that I would like to know?"
"Dozens," I answered with a smirk.
Clark should start writing fanfictions about me at this point, with how may stories he made up about me and told people about.
Or he should just admit how he was really feeling inside and stop putting all his misplaced obsession on my quasi non existent love life.
"Well then, care to enlighten me Blakey-Boy?" Lexi asked, looking at me like she didn't believe me.
I couldn't hold it against her. It wasn't her fault that she believed the rumors. She had never tried to know me before.
"Well, what do you want to know?" I said, because I wasn't sure what she had heard. I didn't know about everything people said behind my back either.
"I don't know. Did you really lock a girl in the furnace room because you wanted her to stay put until you came back with another girl?"
I burst into laughter. What kind of fucked up intro to a porno scenario did Clark tell people I was doing?
"So?" Lexi pressed, because I wasn't answering and just laughing.
"No definitely not," I replied, shaking my head and pressing my hand to my mouth to stop laughing. It wasn't helping.
"Alright how about that girl the guys said you had ditched with only her underwear on in a dirt road?"
"Okay, that one was partially true. I did ditch a girl on the side of the road, though it wasn't in the middle of nowhere, and she was wearing clothes at that point, but that's because she hid in the back of my car in her underwear waiting for me. I told her to put her clothes back on and kicked her out of my car because I was kind of freaked out. So yeah, partially true."
"That's mean," Lexi said, chuckling, like she didn't actually believe it was.
"Please, if had been you, you would have literally kicked the guy out and took picture of him to post them everywhere and destroy his reputation," I pointed out.
It was a fucked up thing to do.
As much as I enjoyed teasing Lexi and telling her I'd head up naked at her window, having someone invade your private space like that was freaky and I would never actually do it.
Lexi punched my shoulder. "Hey! Are you implying I'm vindictive here?"
I knocked my shoulder against hers, chuckling. "No, I'm just implying it's better not to mess with you."
My answer made Lexi smiled.
My heart was beating like crazy in my chest.
My head was still hurting but I could ignore it, because I was sitting beside the girl that I loved and she was getting to know me better and she just seemed to like what she heard.
I never would have believed a night like this would come before.
"So, are you saying that everything about you isn't true? You don't misuse the seminars on a daily basis?"
"Well I guess not everything," I admitted. I had made a couple bad decisions in the past, but nothing has promiscuous and daring as people were gossiping, "but most of it, yeah. And no, I don't misuse the seminars on a daily base," I informed her, laughing.
The reason why I went in the seminars most of the time, was to hide in a quiet dark room to let one of my headaches pass.
"So what? You just bring Stacey in there," Lexi asked, and it kind of felt like a slap.
I wished I hadn't done anything with Stacey.
I wished I hadn't done anything with anyone, really.
I wished I had been more patient. I wished I would have had the confidence before that one day Lexi would actually talk to me without insulting me. That she'd like spending time with me.
Even if it would never end in her wanting to kiss me or date me.
I shouldn't have been an hormonal idiot.
I should have dealt with my heartbreak by listening to sad music instead of sleeping around.
"Well, Stacey was a mistake, one I won't do again," I admitted softly.
"But I just don't get it," Lexi whined. "Why do you let people spread rumors like that? Why do you let everyone believe so firmly that you're a jerk?"
Oh that was easy.
Because I had no self esteem, it was fine if everyone dragged my name through the mud.
I thought I was worthless, so it was fine for people to say shit about me.
"Because people don't miss jerks," I found myself admitting.
"What do you mean? Are you planning on leaving or something?" Lexi replied with a snort.
I shouldn't tell her, that one evening after a party similar to this one, I had actually almost left. That I had been destructive for years.
That I should have been seeing a therapist for longer then I was now.
I shouldn't tell her that every morning I was surprised that I was still alive, that every day I waited for something to go wrong with my head.
"I... No, I'm not planning on leaving right now, but I mean after school, we'll all go our separate ways and no one will remember the jerk. Well, they might remember but they won't miss," I started to explain. It wasn't exactly the truth. It was part of the truth, but it wasn't the whole truth.
"Come on Blake. That's not a good reason enough. You should tell the truth, you know truth is a good thing," Lexi replied, apparently not convinced.
"Not always, it isn't," I said softly.
I'd told this girl too many things now, too many things that would make me seem weak.
I wasn't quite ready to share everything just yet.
Eventually...
"Blake, please tell me you're not gay," Lexi said with a gasp and immediately slapped her forehead for saying that.
I burst into laughter.
What?
How could she possibly be thinking that?
I kept laughing. I couldn't stop.
"Oh don't worry Pumpkin. Trust me, I'm not," I assured her, still laughing, shaking my head slightly at how ridiculous this girl was sometimes.
She was definitely tipsy for her to think I could be interested in anyone but her.
"Come on, get up," Lexi suddenly ordered me, getting up on her feet.
"What? Are you planning on taking advantage of me or something?" I asked getting up too.
Did she want me to prove to her that I wasn't gay?
I wouldn't be against it...
"No," Lexi replied with a smile and then took my hand and dragged me with her towards the street.
I looked at our hands together.
I smiled.
"Lexiiiii, what are we doing?" I asked, chuckling, and a little worried about what this tipsy girl wanted us to do.
I should probably not let her be in charge.
"We're going to go play Ding-Dong ditch," Lexi replied, like this made total sense.
"What?" I asked, laughing,
This girl made no sense.
I loved her.
"Mrs. Pumpernickel lives close from here. I want to play Ding-Dong ditch. And you, Mister are coming with me," she said and grabbed me by the hoodie, dragging me with her.
The only objection I had about this was that she had dropped my hand.
I stopped following her. Lexi turned. "We don't have fire, or dog poop for that matter," I told her, thinking about the kind of Ding-Dong ditch Josh usually played.
"We'll make do without it."
"So what? We'll just ring and run?"
"Yeah, but we'll ring a lot!"
I laughed again. This girl... "Are you drunk?"
"Please. I'm not drunk. I'm perfectly in control of my actions. Look," she replied with a big grin and dig an arabesque beside me.
Or at least she tried. She kind of stumbled doing it.
I chuckled at her cute attempt.
And before I could tease her, she started to sing, "Doo doo doo doo doo... I'm singin' in the rain! Just singing in the rain," and ran away.
"It's not even raining Pumpkin," I teased her, laughing.
"Well thank you Mister Party Pooper," Lexi yelled back and then kept singing flailing her arms around, "What a glorious feeling and I'm happy again. I'm laughing at clouds, so dark up above," and then she reached a streetlight and grabbed it, clearly ready to re-enact Gene Kelly's skit.
Her enthusiasm was contagious so I found myself singing with her, "The sun's in my heart and I'm reaaaady to love."
Immediately, Lexi stumbled on her feet and fell in her butt in the middle of the street.
"Yeah, definitely drunk," I pointed out, still laughing.
She had no idea though, how grateful I was that she wasn't cursing me this time around.
I wished we could have been this close sooner...
It was probably all my fault though.
"So not," Lexi whined and ran up to me to punch me in the shoulder.
"Are too," I replied, and pushed her shoulder a little and ran away from her before she could hit me again.
Lexi ran after me laughing and slowed down my pace so she would catch up.
I'd always let Lexi catch me.
"So, how do you want to do this Pumpkin?" I asked her, not sure what her plan was.
Lexi made a show to think about it, tapping her chin with her index. "Why does this sound like an innuendo?" she asked.
I burst into laughter not expecting that. "Because you're spending too much time with me."
"Anyway, I mean, the name explains it all. We ring... and we run," Lexi said.
"I expected you to be more creative," I teased her.
"I'm in a spur of the moment thing here, work with me dude," she said, and made a shushing sound at me, looking around herself like we were about to commit some great crime.
One of the houses we were standing almost in front had Pumpernickel written on its mailbox, so I assumed we had arrived at destination.
"We ring, we run back here to the trees and we hide, alright?" Lexi said, slurring her words just a little.
I chuckled. "And tell me, when did it become Ring-Run-Hide?"
"It's always been hide, try to keep up dude," Lexi said, rolling her eyes at me.
Lexi took charged and headed for the house. Suddenly, she crouched a bit, like she was a villain in an old cartoon making his way to his victim, kinda tiptoeing towards them.
I kept my hand on my mouth to stop myself from laughing.
Once we were standing on Mrs Pumpernickel's porch, we just stood there, not doing anything.
"There's no bell..." Lexi trailed, stating the obvious.
I closed my eyes, shaking my head a bit. "There's no bell," I repeated.
"Wow," Lexi mumbled.
Well, I guessed I had to improvise now.
This was my Pumpkin's plan after all.
I started to pound on the door. "MRS PUMPERNIPPLE!" I yelled.
"Blake!" Lexi hissed at me and grabbed me by the sleeve, trying to drag me away.
"Please, she's not even waking up yet," I assured her and knocked on the door loudly again. "MRS PUMPERNICKEL! OPEN THE DOOR!" I yelled, with a high pitch voice Josh would have been proud of.
"Blake, okay I had a bad idea. Now, come on," Lexi pressed, tugging at my shirt again.
I kept knocking and not moving from my spot, until I heard sound from inside the house. "Oh shit, run," I told Lexi and sprinted away, heading for the cover of the trees.
We hid behind them right before lights started to turn on in the house.
"Does she have a shot gun in her hands?" Lexi asked, still holding on to the sleeve on my shirt.
I looked at her hand with a smile and then back at the house.
"I think it's a baseball bat," I lied. "She looks scary."
"One, shut up. Two, she is scary. Three, shut up!" Lexi whined and smacked my arm.
I really enjoyed teasing her too much. "Look at you all worried. It would have been a hell of a lot funnier if we had thrown eggs at her screen door in the summer. Have you ever done that? Funny as hell," I joked.
Jayden and Josh had done this to one of the neighbors that was mistreating his cats. It made quite the mess.
I didn't think Mrs Pumpernickel' s action warranted that kind of treatment though. She was a mean old lady, but we shouldn't vandalize her home for that.
"Wow, keep up with the good influence," Lexi said, rolling her eyes at me.
She took a stepped closer to me, as we still both crouched behind a tree.
"Hey, you're the one who wanted to play Ding-Dong ditch. You're the bad person in this," I pointed out.
"Well, you knocked like a maniac," Lexi said.
I looked back at the house and saw Mrs Pumpernickel going back inside. "She's leaving. Come on. Run!"
Lexi didn't look like she wanted to run away.
I smiled at her, and pulled her with me, still crouching behind the cover of the trees, and then when we were close enough to the street and far away from the librarian's house, I let go of Lexi and sprinted away.
"Hey," Lexi yelled after me, regretting it instantly, and followed me.
A few houses further away, I stopped and turned around.
Lexi hadn't expected that because she bumped into me.
I closed my arms around her.
My heart was beating fast and not because of the run.
"You should see yourself Pumpkin, you were all but wobbling to get to me. Drunky-Lexi," I teased her and laughed.
Before she could protest, I lifted her off her feet, holding her bridal style in my arms.
"Put me down," Lexi whined, pushing at my chest, and kicking her feet around, but she was tipsy and light in my arms, so I wasn't letting her go just yet.
"Oh, so that's what I get for being a gentleman?" I joked, walking back to the party with her in my arms.
She should be happy about this. She could rest her legs.
I should be the one being carried. I was a little exhausted from the football game I had played just hours earlier.
"Please you aren't being a gentleman, you're being an ass," Lexi said and snorted.
I kinda didn't want to be a gentleman suddenly. I couldn't blame my sudden desire to make a rash decision on alcohol. I could only blame my racing heart and my stupidity.
I set Lexi back down on her feet beside a bus shelter.
It took a second too late for Lexi to realized what I was doing as I walked up closer and closer to her, her back hitting the wall, my hands on both side of her, trapping her there. "So, I'm being an ass?" I asked her, bending my head a little so she was all I could see.
Lexi blinked her eyes slowly. Her breathing picked up, and then just stopped.
I was looking at her lips.
Her hands were on my chest. She could push me away. She wasn't pushing me away.
I wanted to kiss her.
I'd been dreaming about kissing her for years.
And she wasn't telling me to get away. She wasn't pushing me away.
Her face was actually leaning towards mine, coming closer.
She closed her eyes.
I was going to kiss the girl of my dreams.
I closed mine too.
"GUYS," someone yelled and Lexi made a little yelping sound, pushing my chest and backing away from me.
I jumped in surprised too, and freaked out.
Oh shit. Oh shit, shit, shit.
Was I out of my goddamn mind? I couldn't just kiss Lexi like that!
She was tipsy for god's sakes.
I was the first to know how Lexi didn't think about what she did or said when she was drunk.
I shouldn't be taking advantage of her like this.
"There you are! We've been looking everywhere," Mark told Lexi.
"What's wrong?" Lexi asked, following him and leaving me behind.
Yep, that made more sense than me kissing her.
"Alex is... well trashed and asking for you and yeah. He's not a funny drunk," I caught Mark saying, following them behind.
I didn't know if I should be grateful to Alex right now, or mad. I guessed I was a little bit of both.
"Let's go," Lexi pressed, quickening her pace.
Lexi must be grateful to her friend. She couldn't possibly really want to kiss me, at least not without the help of alcohol.
Once we got back to the party, Alex was sitting on her front lawn, looking like a mess.
"Look, just gooooooOOOoo! You can aaaall leave to McPoo and goooOOoo eat! I'm waiiitiiing fooor Kittyyyy," Alex was whining.
Dwayne, Connor, the twins and Daphnee were there too, looking after him.
"Lexiiiiiii," Alex yelped the second he saw her.
What was he doing? Did he suddenly realized he liked her again now that he was intoxicated?
"I'm soooooooo sorryyy," he yelled, getting up and losing his footing, falling back on his ass. "I shouldn't have let you kiss me at the end of ninth grade. Would have spared everyone trouble. I'm a baaaad person. I'm soooooOOooooOOooo sorry," he said to her.
I couldn't exactly argue with her there.
But why the hell was he saying this to her, and in public at that.
Didn't he think about the fact that this could be humiliating for Pumpkin?
And Lexi really didn't look happy about this outburst.
"Would have been much easier if you hadn't and we hadn't dated," he pressed, trying to get up again.
Everyone was making fun of him.
I wasn't. There was nothing fun about what he was saying.
"Alex, just shush alright? You know this, I know you're sorry and I forgive you okay? Now let's just go home alright?" Lexi said, her voice flat.
With one hand on the ground and his ass in the air, Alex yelled, "Fine! But don't leave alright? Wait. Travis! WHERE'S TRAVIS?"
Christ, what a mess.
Drunks usually got on my nerves.
"Thanks guys, I'll take it from here," Lexi suddenly said in a rush.
The guys went back inside while Lexi headed to her drunk friend, their two new friends joining her and Daphnee.
They tried getting him up again, but he was kind of not helping them.
"Need help Pumpkin?" I asked softly.
I didn't wait for her answer, and with Daphnee on his other side, helping him up and made our way to his car.
Lexi walked in front and opened the door to the backseat.
"He smells nice Lexi," Alex told her, and then stared at me, "You smell nice!"
I rolled my eyes.
"I get why you'd hang out with him, he smells nice," Alex mumbled to Lexi.
"Alright man, time to get home," I told him, chuckling a little.
Weirdo.
I didn't get what Lexi had seen in him.
"Travis! I need to see Travis," he suddenly whined.
Wow. Was he going to tell him he smelled nice too? I chuckled again.
"I'm here," his friend Travis said, and got in the car in the backseat with him.
Good thing the girls had a guy with them to help deal with heavy drunk Alex. Lexi closed the door behind them.
"Well, I think that's my cue to leave," Lexi said softly, looking at her shoes, her cheeks red.
Was she thinking about our almost kiss? My heart was beating fast again.
"Yeah I—"
I had no idea what I would have said, but someone interrupted me, yelling "Mickey D's time!"
Lexi half smiled. "Go on lucky bastard, go eat cheeseburgers," she said.
I wasn't planning on following our friends to any late night expeditions though, not if she wasn't going to be there.
"Well, there's anti-pucking crap in their drinks. Might be good for Alex," I tried.
"I'm not going to drag his drunken butt into a restaurant," Lexi said and laughed. Daphnee started the car, sitting at the wheel. Lexi looked at it, making a face. "Well, have fun."
I smiled at her, "You too," I said, teasingly.
Taking care of a drunk was definitely not going to be fun.
Lexi rolled her eyes at me and waved at me, heading for the car sitting in the back seat.
I wondered what would happen between a drunk Alex and a tipsy Lexi in a car.
Nothing. Nothing would happen because she didn't love him.
She had said as much and I trusted her.
I went back to the party and said my goodbyes to everyone.
Clark whined. I ignored him.
I drove back home in silence, not listening to music.
My head was hurting again. I had kind of been able to ignore it while with Lexi, but now the pain was back in full blow.
Everyone was asleep when I got home.
I took a shower, and painkillers and went to bed.
I stared at my ceiling, unable to sleep.
All I could think about was that I had almost kissed Lexi... and I wanted another chance.
_________
Happy Monday my little Pumpkins! I hope you had a good week, and that you and your loved ones are happy and healthy. :D
I also hope you enjoyed this chapter. Blake almost kissed his Pumpkin. ;P It's fun to have these chapters that show how clueless Blake truly is when it comes to Lexi's feelings. And Alex. XD
Well, I don't think I have much more to say. I need to start sleeping more. I'm tired. 0_0
Oh. And... the kiss is in just three chapters. ;P
If you're a bit impatient, you can subscribe to my Patreon to have four Smirking Jerk chapters in advance at patreon.com/kariannegiard.
I think that covers it.
Thanks for coming back every week! See you all next Monday! <3