Sam said" Where's Bobby?"
Dean said" In town. Supply run."
" In this?" It was storming, really bad, Bobby's a hero!
" Man is a hero. We are officially out of hunter's helper," He held up the empty whiskey bottle," And River tamer." He held up a Crunch wrapper, The electricity crackled, then I heard wings.
Balthazar said" Hello, boys." He walked past us," You've seen The Godfather, right?"
" Balthazar?"
" You know, the end when Michael Corleone sends his men to kill his enemies in one bloody swoop."
" Hey."
" Dead Sea brine. Good, good, good." He poured it into a bowl," Then Moe Greene gets hit in the eye. Don Cuneo gets it in the revolving door."
" I said, hey."
" You did. Twice. Good for you. Blood of lamb. Blood of lamb." Then he was at the fridge," Beer, cold pizza, blood of lamb." He pulled out a jar," Yes. Blood of lamb."
Sam said" Why are you talking about The Godfather."
" We're in it right now. Tonight. And in the role of Michael Corleone: the archangel Raphael."
Dean said" Mind telling us what you mean?"
" No, no, no. No, no, no." He poured out a drawer then opened the false bottom, I tilted my head." Yes. Bone of a lesser saint. This vertebra will do very nicely. Your Mr. Singer does keep a beautiful pantry."
" Wait. Raphael is after you?"
" Raphael is after us all. You see, he consolidated his strength and now he's on the move."
Sam said" And where's Cas?"
" Oh, Cassie? He is deep, deep underground. So good old Raphie put out a hit list... on every last samaritan who helped our dear Cas. Including both of you. And so much more importantly, me. See, he wants to draw Cas out in the open."
" You expect us to just believe you?"
" Oh, don't. You'll go where I throw you, either way."
Dean said" What's that supposed to mean?"
" And that's all the time we have, gentlemen." He walked to us," Where is it?" He lifted his jacket and there was a huge blood stain,
" Oh, what happened there?"
" Oh, garish, I know. You see, Uncle Raphie sent one of his nastiest to handle me. I'm flattered, actually. And down a lung, at the moment, but that's all right. Here's for you." He handed Sam a key, what's going on?
Sam said" What am I supposed to do with this?"
" Run with it." Then he was slung back, then an angel walked in," Virgil. I said run!" Then we were flung through the window....
We landed on a pad,
A man said" Cut!" I looked at Sam and Dean, tilting my head, I'm really confused and really dizzy. I stood up, Sam and Dean looked around,
Sam said" So no angels?"
Dean said" No angels, I think."
" Should we be killing anybody?"
" I don't think so."
I said" Running?"
" Where?" I looked at them, now I'm getting scared... I shuffled closer to my brothers. Sam picked up a piece of glass but it was rubber,
A man said" That's a wrap on Jared, Jensen and Elliot."
Sam said" Who the hell are Jared and Jen-"
A woman said" Jared. Three minutes, okay? Great." She grabbed Sam's arm and led him away, Dean and I followed,
Dean said" Where are we going?"
Another woman said" Jensen, there you are. Let's just get you in the chair." She led him away, another woman walked up to me.
She said" Come on, sweetie, let's go find you a snack." She grabbed my hand and led me away from my brothers.
I said" But- huh?" My head really hurts, I'm really confused, and I really want my brothers!
I got away from the lady, I figured we're in an alternate dimension, and our lives back home is a tv show. My... well, my name is Elliot Colson here. Dean's Jensen Ackles and Sam's Jared Padelecki. I'm really confused and my brain is trying to break out of my skull.
I ran up to Sam and Dean as they were headed into a trailer, I latched onto Dean's stomach.
We walked into the trailer,
Dean said" Dude, I have a helicopter."
Sam said" Whoa. All right, who puts a 300-gallon aquarium in their trailer?"
" Apparently, Jensen Ackles."
" All right. Here we go. Let's see who this guy is." I leaned against Sam as he sat down at the laptop,
" Well, he's not a hunter, but he plays one on tv. Oh, come on. Look at these male-modeling sons of bitches. Nice Blue Steel, Sam."
" Hey, apparently it's our job. All right. Here it goes. Says you're from Texas."
" Really?"
" Yeah. And, uh... Oh. Says you were on a soap opera."
" What?" I tilted my head, Sam looked at Dean, Sam turned the laptop as Dean walked over. We watched the scene, yuck! I looked at Dean, then Dean shut the laptop," Don't like this universe, Sammy. We need to get out of this universe."
" Yeah. No argument here. But I don't think our prayers are reaching Cas. Or the real Cas."
" Well, I agree. I think we are definitely out of soul-phone range but..."
" What?" Dean grabbed a pad and a marker,
" If we can reverse Balthazar's spell. I watched every move. If we just get the ingredients, right? Get back to that same window and..." He showed us the symbol Balthazar used," There's no place like home." I got dizzy and Sam's hand stopped me from falling." Riv?" My eyes started to close,
" River? Hey!" My eyes snapped open, I looked at them, everything felt pins and needles, and wobbly.
" Hey, River, talk to us, come on!"
I mumbled" I don't feel good, De..." I felt blood slid down my lips,
" River!"
" I wanna go home. Home. Home."
Sam said" River, hey, everything's gonna be okay. Don't try and use your-" I passed out.
I woke up in a strange place, I sat up quickly, I was in a room. For a kid. I tilted my head then got up, I wobbled at first then saw I was in PJs... like actual character PJs. I groaned then found my clothes, I dug through the pocket and found a note. I quickly read it, Riv, you passed out, we kinda had to lie, and this universe you're being cared for by an aunt. She took you, but we'll see you in the morning. Keep your guard up. Don't use your powers, if you even still have them here. Everything's gonna be fine. We're okay. Dean, Sammy. I sighed, then looked at all the stuff, this kid's got it good, he's lucky.
———
Sam and Dean aren't good actors... Which is really weird, since Dean told me actors were just glorified liars. And Sam and Dean are the best at lying. I guess it's the cameras, Sam doesn't like cameras.
They finally walked back to the chairs,
Sam said" Who wrote this? Nobody says penultimate."
Dean said" Gun, mouth, now." Another guy said something,
" Thank god." We walked to the desk,
" All right, damn it. We earned this."
Dean did the symbol on the mirror,
Sam said" That's it?"
Dean said" That's it, Toto."
I said" S'thing feels wrong." Then my head pounded again, I flinched, grabbing my head. Sam grabbed my arm to keep me balanced as I wobbled.
We jumped through the window and landed on the floor, huh? We all groaned,
Sam said" Oh, that one hurt."
I said" Told ya so."
I was taken away from my brothers and now I've been throwing the biggest tantrum any kid could throw. Breaking, screaming, crying, stomping.. and my favorite, cussing! I don't like it here, I want to go home, I want my powers! I want to feel okay, at least. My head won't stop hurting, and now my body's joined my head.
———
I somehow got to Sam and Dean, I learned the guy who plays Cas got murdered last night... then somehow Sam got ahold of me and told me everything. Virgil was here, and we gotta get home before it's too late.
I walked into the set,
Dean said" Yeah, but here, you got a pretty good life. I mean, back home, the hits have been coming since you were six months old. You gotta admit, being a bazillionaire, married to Ruby? The whole package. It's no contest."
Sam said" No, you know, you were right. We just don't mean the same thing here. I mean, we're not even brothers here, man."
" All right, then. Let's get our crazy show back home."
Virgil was killing everyone on this weird set. Sam and I ran out,
We screamed" Hey!" Virgil shot at us, we dodged the bullet as Dean tackled him through the wall. Sam and I ran into the room they were in. Sam dodged a punched, Dean grabbed Virgil and threw him to the ground. I dug through his pockets and picked up the key, I held it up.
Sam said" Dean, got it." The place started shaking," Raphael. Run." Then we were flung through the window...
We landed on the ground,
A woman said" You three... have the strangest luck." We stood up, I was shaking as my power coursed through me quickly.
Dean said" Raphael? Nice meat suit. Dude looks like a lady." Then I groaned, grabbing my stomach as pain pierced through me. I fell to the ground, holding my stomach.
" The key."
I heard Balthazar say" And that will open you a locker at the Albany bus station." I stood up as my brothers did,
" Really?"
" You see, I needed a modest decoy to make it more convincing."
" Give me the weapons."
" Sorry, darling. They're gone."
" What?"
" I said, too bloody late. You see, they were so well hidden that I needed time to find them. So I volunteered these three marmosets for a game of fetch with Virgil. You three were such an adequate stick. Thank you. Thank you, boys."
" You've made your last mistake."
" I've got a few more up my sleeve, honey." Raphael walked towards him, then Cas showed up.
He said" Step away from him, Raphael. I have the weapons now. Their power is with me." Lightning and thunder boomed, I saw the shadow of his wings.
Raphael said" Castiel."
" If you don't want to die tonight... back off." Then Raphael went away,
Balthazar said" Well, Cas... now that you have your sword, try not to die by it." Then Balthazar was gone, Cas walked to us,
Sam said" Cas, what the hell?"
Then we were back at Bobby's,
Sam said" Wait. Wait, you were in on this? Using us as a diversion?"
Cas said" It was Balthazar's plan. I would have done the same thing."
Dean said" That's not comforting, Cas."
" When will I be able to make you understand? If I lose against Raphael, we all lose everything." He turned to face us,
" Yeah, Cas, we know the stakes. That's about all you've told us."
" I'm sorry about all this. I'll explain when I can." Then he flew away.
" Friggin' angels." Sam hit the doorway,
He said" Solid. It's real. Nice."
" Yeah. Yeah. Real, moldy, termite-eaten home, sweet home. Chock full of crap that wanna skin you. Oh, and... we're broke again."
" Yeah. But, hey... at least we're talking." I rubbed my eyes, then started breathing heavily, the energy... everything started shaking.
" River?"
" River!" I screamed as the energy blasted and I was flung back, my arm was grabbed and I hit Sam's chest as he hit the floor, groaning.
" Sammy?! Riv?!" Everything became normal again... then I passed out.
Dean's POV
I screamed" Sammy?! Riv?!" As Sam hit the ground in the kitchen hard, the place stopped shaking as I saw River pass out. I ran to them,
Sam said" He okay?"
I said" Don't know." I lifted River up with one arm and held out my hand, Sam grabbed my hand. I pulled him up then looked at River," What the hell, man?"
" I don't know. Dean, it's getting stronger, and he can't control it if it's pushed back too much."
" I wish we could just get rid of them, he could be normal."
" Does he even have control?"
" Yeah, he does. I've seen it. He can control it, but if he's scared... all that control goes out the window."
" How are we supposed to help him if we don't even know what he is?"
" I don't know." River whimpered and dug his face against my neck, I sighed and adjusted him on my hips, rubbing his back." He's growing up too fast."
" He thinks he has to, Dean. And we can't just ship him off to be a kid... because he's not just a kid, he's our little brother and he doesn't do well without us."
" I know, I don't think I ever want to ship him off to a babysitter again."
" Yeah, he'd probably kick our asses if we did."
" Yeah."