This book's coming to an end, well I might have to lessen the chapters rather than the numbers I have originally planned cause I have end of year exams in a week and a month. Yes, I'm extra prepared. The Osamu book is going to come out after my exams happen so around June.
Fun-fact: the book is inspired by EXO's song Sweet Lies by the lyrics,
I don't give you my heart easily
I melt you with sweet lies
Like a hot cocoa in the winter
I keep trying to push you away
Had to tell you that I lie to you
But you know I'm a pretender
I already told you that I'm an unwieldy
Blade and if you want me
You might get cut deep
You pretend not to hear my warnings
And a different part from the song
Because the truth hurts more than the lie
3rd P.O.V.
Lapse
Noun|Meaning:
A failure to maintain a higher state.
During the night Y/n and Atsumu secretly met in the common room of the Hera Palace. The lights were open yet they were dim, the double doors were shut closed to make sure no one going to eavesdrop on their conversation. "Atsumu what did you want to talk about?" She sits at the couch, crossing her legs after she got into the most comfortable position.
"Suna's gonna kill ya if you even go near Reiko Y/n." He said the most obvious thing, he was fiddling with his fingers showing how anxious he was about the situation.
"I know but even if it's for a split moment I want to spend time with my sister." Atsumu pitied the lady, everything taunted him to the ends of the world. His mistakes, his decisions, his foolishness, his selfishness. He destroyed a family all for his entertainment. "Don't look at me like that, you make me feel as if I am dying or something." She lightly jokes.
'She changed so much.' He thought, her heart that always seemed so cold became so warm. He always thought about how she changed, always thinking about that every time he saw her. "Atsumu I don't want you to worry about anything, it was my choice Atsumu, it was my choice to hide it from them." Atsumu's eyes were getting teary all of a sudden, he just could not believe how she had still cared for him after all he did.
He choked back a sob, all this guilt has been eating him up for the past five years. Both him and Y/n didn't understand each other, there was np way for them to agree to each other's decision. His breathing became haggard, his mind couldn't think straight, all the pent up frustration has been released just because he met the one he loves once again. Y/n's figure came near him.
She hugged the man who was having a mental breakdown. "Atsumu I want you to know that I did this not only for the friendship you and my brother hold but for the dream you told me about six years ago." His head was buried into Y/n's stomach, his rears dampening her nightwear.
"You underestimate me too much Y/n. I'm not the top high school setter just for show, I'm gonna be the greatest volleyball player you'll ever meet. What do you know? Maybe you'll be asking for my autograph in years time." He shows off his volleyball skills in front of Y/n. They were first years back then, they talked about their dreams and predicted what position they well be in after six years.
"I'll be playing in MSBY Black Jackals as their starting setter, just watch me." Y/n was watching him blabber about his dreams and thought that he was like a kid. He had always been a big fan of MSBY Black Jackals, he had always watched the matches between MSBY and Schweiden Adlers.
Y/n was envious of how ambitious he could be, she couldn't even live for a second without thinking of giving up. In Atsumu's honey coloured eyes, Y/n was ignorant who never really cared about others but what she said next made his heart flutter. "I'll support you with your dreams with all I have so don't you even dare put your dream at risk." He changed what he thought of her after she said that.
"I'll support you with your dreams with all I have so don't you even dare put your dream at risk." She repeated the same lines she said six years ago. Atsumu wailed at the woman's stomach, he buried his head there to hide his red nose and puffy eyes. "I said this back then because I loved you but now I'm saying this again to support you nothing more than as a friend.
"Y/n thank you for helping me with my dream." Y/n felt his lips curve up. "You did it all for my dream Y/n, you continued to support me with my dream even though I caused all the destruction in your life." Atsumu somehow felt released from his sins, the fact that his heart didn't feel a heavy weight anymore. He felt free from the chains that had been binding him for years.
"It was my choice to help you Atsumu so don't shoulder the blame, ever." She said to him one final time. He felt so thankful for Y/n, her everlasting kindness for him, her never ending care for him. He questioned his decision of why he decided to lose such precious diamond that was right on his palm.
Y/n and Reiko were sitting at the dinner table as they ate their fill for breakfast. "Nee-san what happened?" Y/n nearly loses her grip on her silver spoon, she slowly dips it back to the porridge of bowl so that she wouldn't clumsily drop it. "I know that whatever you did, you must have done it for the greater good." Y/n couldn't believe what she had just heard that came out from the young adult's lips, the insane amount of trust she had placed on her sister made feel special.
"Forgive me Reiko, now's not the time yet." She avoided the question, she had to dodge that question until the day she dies if she wanted to maintain peace between Suna and Atsumu. Y/n was battling with herself last night, she kept questioning her own motives over and over again. She doesn't know if she should tell the truth to Suna to save her own skin yet again or to hide the truth to maintain peace, either way there would still be war.
"Nee-san I hope one day everything will go back go how it was." She had forgotten how innocent this girl was before, she still didn't know back then what was happening, she didn't even know what was going on through her sister's mind. Y/n knew she wasn't that girl anymore, she had grown into a fine mature woman who has been exposed into the adult world.
What Reiko didn't know was everything was already messed up from the start.
"Reiko you can always come here." Y/n grabs a spare card that can grant you access to the Penthouse and slid it beside Reiko's fruit bowl. "If anything goes bad, I'll be here." She felt her guts twist when she said that, she thought how fucked up Reiko's life was without her, she wasn't able to guide Reiko properly towards adulthood and now here she is saying that thing.
Reiko stares at the brown leather card holder, you can make out the black card as you can slightly see it. "Nee-san I want you to know that somewhere, if there is somewhere in nii-san's heart he probably still cares about you." Y/n tried to hide her eyes that was already glossy by letting out a small laugh and was looking at her food with a smile; somewhere deep inside her she held hope for what her sister had said.
Y/n's phone screen lit up upon receiving a message from Mr.Tamura, Reiko managed to see the lock-screen despite being so far-away. It was a picture of them, Reiko, Rintarō and Y/n were all smiling together and that was the day when they went to have an afternoon picnic. They were sitting in a red plaided cloth laid above the ground, Y/n was the one who took the photo that time.
After they finished breakfast, Reiko and Y/n headed to the lobby to meet up with Rintarō. Reiko was wearing her newly washed school uniform, Reiko was eyeing her sister's grey coloured pinstriped double breasted blazer dress. She was going to rate it ten out of ten, the dull grey ankle pump shoes that paired with her dress. It had been so long as Reiko watched her sister's back again.
They reached the lobby where they saw the Rintarō and the MSBY Black Jackals boys talking amongst each other. It was the first time for Rintarō to talk to the ginger-head volleyball player. They were all sitting in the lobby, Atsumu was conversing with Rintarō and Y/n could make out the guilt in his eyes, she doesn't know if she just knows him well or he was just being plain obvious about it. "Good-morning," Reiko bows her head to the men as they reached them.
"Nii-san I'm going with Kazuhiko this morning, I just came here to tell you that." She smiled at her brother, Rintarō couldn't refuse her request especially after what he did yesterday to Reiko. He felt bad about hurting his little sister.
"Oh okay." He felt scared, he suddenly felt the small distance between them, he didn't want it to go further.
Reiko saw the approaching boy and immediately rushed her goodbyes. "I'm going, Kazuhiko's here. I'll see you later nii-san, nee-san."
Y/n waved her hand to her sister who just returned a small smile, she saw Kazuhiko who gave a shy smile towards the older female. "I'll be seeing you guys three hours from now on, I suggest you to arrive early. The photographer's quite impatient, or cameraman whatever you please to call it." She took in a large deep breath after remembering that she will have to check the construction for the new plan. Y/n bows her head before leaving them.
Rintarō followed behind Y/n because he needed to talk to her, it wouldn't be a proper talk obviously. "Do you need anything Rintarō?" She spun on her heels, good thing Y/n has good balance for high heels or else she would gave fallen to the ground.
"Stay away from Reiko, Y/n I'm begging you." It was a command but a request at the same time. There was no anger in his voice so Y/n decided to at least listen to him.
"Rintarō I want you to tell me why first." There was no way in hell Y/n was going to avoid Reiko, Reiko was a precious jewel to her. She felt this overwhelming happiness when she saw Reiko and when she talked to her, Reiko's innocence and kindness always made Y/n smile.
"Reiko was bullied because of you Y/n." For some reason her heart weighed heavier than usual, it felt like there were boulders on top of her heart. "Reiko was sent to the principal's office time to time every time one of her classmates insulted you. Reiko nearly became an outcast Y/n." He says in a this is all your fault manner of tone. "Do you truly wish for Reiko to suffer further?" She thought she could fix everything but then it all came crashing down when she found out what she has caused.
"Huh?" She understood what he meant clear as the sky, she had processed it all yet for some reason she couldn't take it in. "Rintarō I apologise, I always lied to you." She muttered, was she willing to give everything up for just the sake of her relationship with her family? Was she willing to risk the bond Rintarō and Atsumu hold? Was she willing to be selfish?
We all become our own demons when we
want a change.
"Mother what do I do if I can't make a choice?"
"Think what the consequences are for each choice my boy."
"It's like being selfless and selfish when you make a choice."