I couldn't stop thinking about it for the next few days. All that occupied my mind was Skye.
After our conversation, Roman and I ate dinner in the refectory as we waited for his parents. I expected them to be mad at me, but they weren't and instead grateful I called the ambulance. The whole time we ate, Roman kept telling me how Skye was going to get better and that he was going to make sure of it. I sat there in silence. How could I tell him that she didn't want his help? He wouldn't listen to me anyways, and so I just sat there, listening to his false hope, trying to hold myself together knowing how crushed he would be if anything happened to his sister.
A few days later, Skye had been moved to her regular room at the hospital, and Roman wasn't in school because he wanted to take care of her. Those few days I would go to his classes after school and ask the teachers for the work he needed to complete. I'd drop it off at his house straight after, sometimes I'd just leave because he looked too tired to conversate and needed sleep, other times he'd let me in, and I'd listen as he would tell me about Skye's progress.
Turns out she filled her water bottle with crushed stimulants and appetite suppressors. The stimulants were causing her to have an addiction and so the doctors were trying to ween her off it. It explained why she always carried that water bottle around, taking constant, aggressive sips every now and then.
I wasn't allowed to visit her yet due to hospital rules but Roman gave me her number and so we texted. She would tell me about all the hospital drama she overheard from the staff that sometimes sounded like a Greys Anatomy episode. Other times she'd send me pictures of paintings she had done in her spare time. I admired it. How she almost died yet kept a good spirit.
Skye's expecting to die. It's nothing new to her.
I didn't want to think about that, but it was so hard not to.
Sitting at lunch, I kept staring at the wall, thinking about Skye once again. She told me her parents were sending her back to therapy and how useless it was to her, but I told her to just enjoy having someone else's company and she seemed to take it better that way.
Rya was discussing something about Christopher once again. What it was, I had no clue, but I assumed he was being a dick and getting under her skin in yet another way.
"Are you listening?" she suddenly cut me out of my thoughts.
I snapped my head to her, "Hmm?"
"I said, the school's library's gotten quite busy today. Any wonders as to why?" I didn't tell Rya about Skye. It wasn't right to. This was for Roman's family to tell, not me, and so I couldn't blame Rya for her cluelessness.
The library being busy probably meant Roman was back. He still spent his time in the library every lunch still, just tons of girls followed him in there, pretending to study when, in reality, they were just checking him out or trying to get his attention. I didn't know whether he acted to it or not.
"Yeah, I guess." He didn't tell me he was coming back in today. I kind of thought he would but I guess not. He probably had too much on his mind.
I picked at the chicken nuggets on my tray. I didn't like the idea of buying them and the idea of breaking my diet was lowkey terrifying, but I decided to do it. It wasn't just for the girls who wanted to be more like me, but for myself too. I knew the pressures Skye faced; I knew them all too well. For once, I just wanted to eat whatever the hell I wanted without fear of what it'd do to my body. It was slightly nerving to do so, and the stares I got weren't exactly ones of support either, but I did it. I got carrot sticks on the side, but I still did it.
"Breaking your diet, Sienna?" a voice hummed beside me. For fuck's sake.
"What d'you want, Nikki?" I groaned. The smell of her sickly-sweet perfume made me nauseous. How did she wear that thing and not throw up? I knew Rya could smell it too as she scrunched her nose.
"I just thought you were staying away from carbs and dairy." She shrugged. "I mean, you don't want to gain so much before the dance, do you? You usually got for form fitting and form fitting wouldn't look that nice on a... well, you know."
A spark of angry surged through my bloodstream. God, I wanted to slap her so bad. Almost as bad as I wanted to slap Leah Kingston.
"Why don't you just fuck off, Nikki, huh?" I snapped. She stepped back a little at the bitterness latched to my words.
"I was only trying to –"
"No, you were trying to be a degrading bitch of a body shamer. What? Ran out of small dicks to suck?"
She furiously placed her hands on her hips, "You can't talk about body shaming when you are literally slut shaming me." Her words stunk the same sickly sweetness as her perfume.
"It's not slut-shaming when you're sucking off half the male staff in the school. What? Are your grades so bad even your dad can't tamper with the system?" the words were spitting from my mouth before I could control it.
"Yeah and, just so you know, anyone can wear a tight dress and look good in it, bitch." Rya stood up and shot at Nikki.
Nikki squared up to Rya and narrowed her eyes. "Of course, you'd say that. You look like a twig." She scoffed.
"And you look like a baboon's ass. Your point?" Rya fired back with no care in the world.
Nikki stepped back in shock, obviously offended, gasping as she placed a hand on her heart. "You two act like your saints but don't act so high and mighty when you know you're just as bad as the rest of us." She hissed and stepped forward. I stepped forward to meet her.
"I am a bitch. So, take. A step. Back." I lowered my voice. Nikki and I stood there for a few seconds before she stomped her foot and stormed off.
Rya let out a whistle as she stalked away. "And here I was thinking you'd gone soft."
I looked back at her, "She really pissed me off, what else was I supposed to do?" Rya held her hands up in defence.
After that whole Nikki thing, Rya and I walked back to her locker. I tried to keep an eye out for Roman but I couldn't see him and so I assumed his time in the longer was over running. We reached Rya's locker, and I leant back on the wall, letting out a loud huff.
"You know Mr Wright's been looking for you." She hummed as she punched in her combination. "D'you know why?"
I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. "Probably some overdue homework or something. I'm really just trying to focus on the subjects I'm, you know, failing at."
Rya laughed and rolled her eyes, opening her locker to let a pink slip of card fly out to the floor. "Urgh, again?!" she groaned and bent down to pick it up. "Do I love you? My God, if your love were a grain of sand, mine would be a universe of beaches." She read aloud. "Like that's not cheesy."
"It's The Princess Bride." I snatched it out of her hands.
"Isn't that a movie though?"
"You do know that the majority of movies are based off books nowadays?"
"Oh." She said quietly before taking the card straight out of my hands. "Maybe I should report this?"
I scoffed and she gave a scowl as if to say 'what?'. "You want to report secret admirer notes?"
Rya shrugged and stuffed the card back into her locker. "Maybe I have a stalker? You don't know that."
I chuckled lightly, "I mean, you could, but wouldn't your stalker be writing it in his own blood by now? This has been going on for weeks, you'll probably find out who it is when they ask you to the Spring Fling."
"First of all," she held up a finger, "Ew. And second of all," She sighed, "How do I know that this person will ask me to the Spring Fling?"
I rolled my eyes once more and she slapped my arm. "Ouch!" I groaned. She cocked her head to the side mockingly, not realising that she genuinely has a hard slap, "I just... don't you think it's a coincidence that this person is sending these notes to you near the time of Spring Fling? I don't." I chimed. She didn't look too happy but knew I was right. That's first.
She was about to respond when the noise of a large crowd rumbled down the halls and slams against the lockers were heard. "What the hell is that?" she turned her head in the direction of the eruption. Without time to spare, she grabbed my hand, and we went chasing down to what was happening.
Fights sometimes happened in our school, but it was mainly between the football players and they're rival teams on the field of game day, or some cheating scandal brawl between two girls in the parking lot, but whenever a fight happened in school, mainly in the halls, it was usually because of one person.
Yep. You guessed it.
Adam Reeves.
We reached the massive crowd to see Adam throwing punches at some guy he had pinned against the locker. What the fuck?
"Get his nose! Get his nose!" Chad Willman shouted from the crowd, punching the air.
"How's about you get a life, Chad?" Rya snapped and we pushed further through the crowd.
As we got closer, it was evident that Adam wasn't fighting just anyone. Oh no. In fact, he was fighting the last person I'd ever expect as Taylor pushed him off and kneed him in the groin.
"She's a fucking bitch and you keep defending her!" he declared as Adam managed to make a quick recovery and stood up straight. Taylor's eye was turning swollen from where I assumed Adam had punched him.
"You know fuck all about her, man!" he growled back. Fucking growled, I swear.
"I know she's a bitch. That's more than you do –" Adam threw a punch straight at Taylor's nose and blood gushed down his face. Holy shit, this wasn't good. The blood trickled to his chin and dropped in splatters to his T-shirt as he tried to cup the bleeding with his hand.
"You motherfucker." He infuriatedly chuckled through the blood.
"Next time, don't talk shit about my girlfriend." Adam got closer and warned.
"You mean your whore –" Adam threw another punch but this time Taylor fought back.
"Someone needs to do something." Rya said by my side. Adam always got into fights, it was kind of his thing, but this fight was different, this fight was with his best friend – someone who was basically his brother. It felt wrong.
I remembered the times where Adam would get into a fight so bad Taylor used to have to take him to hospital, frantically calling me to meet him there. I used to take Adam back to mine to change his gauze and bandages, clean him up, make sure he was okay. Taylor used to sort out the rest with whoever Adam fought, making sure he didn't get in more trouble. We were like a team. Yet, here I stood, only watching the fight, knowing I would do nothing afterwards. And here Taylor was, fighting the boy he's saved constantly.
Oh, how times have changed?
"I'm going in." Rya spoke by my side. I managed to snap back into reality and watched her slender frame squeeze through the remaining crowd.
"What? Rya?!" I called after her and pushed through.
She grabbed – and I mean grabbed – Taylor's arm and held him back. Yes, as in restrained him. Rya McCoy, a practical size-two, porcelain doll-like person with barely any muscle, managed to restrain Taylor Vermont. A 6ft basketball player.
I always knew she was freakishly strong.
"Pack it up, redhead!" she snapped as Taylor tried to fight off her grip. Her fingers were most likely digging into his skin by now.
Adam was about to make an advance as someone else grabbed him. Christopher Knowles of all people.
"Huh, didn't know spaghetti strands had arms." He mused, struggling with Adam who did not seem happy. Rya shot Christopher the dirtiest of glares.
"Huh, didn't know Mike Wazowski had a twin." She retorted back, struggling with Taylor.
"Suck my dick." He smiled a little too sweetly.
"Let's be honest, honey, no one can find it." She also smiled back a little too sweetly. Adam tried to fight off Christopher, but he gripped him right back and restrained him. I never actually knew how strong Christopher was, but he must've been somewhat to restrain someone. Especially someone like Adam.
"Jesus, dude! Would you calm the fuck down? I'm not trying to start some Romeo and Tybalt fight."
"What the hell is going on here?!" Principle Cunningham stormed down the halls to part the sea of students forming a massive crowd. Her eyes gleamed with fury at Adam and Taylor, and I noticed how Rya shrank back behind Taylor as the Principle's eyes beamed at her.
"Anyone care to explain?!" Principle Cunningham threw her hands in the air.
"There was a fight, ma'am." Christopher explained. "Don't worry, I restrained it."
"Actually, Rya stepped in before you did." Taylor argued defensively. Christopher gave him a glare.
Principle Cunningham tapped her foot on the floor and turned her attention to Rya. "Is this true, Miss McCoy?"
I noticed how she gulped before nodding quickly. "Erm, yes."
Principle Cunningham nodded her head and thanked her before turning to Christopher. "I don't appreciate liars, Mr Knowles. Especially not arrogant ones. Thank you, Rya." She turned to thank Rya again and I could see the smirked glued to Rya's lips as Christopher lowered his gaze to the ground.
"I expect none of this to happen again, do you hear me?!" she shouted out to the dozens of students still remaining. Everyone went into a quiet mutter of 'yes'. "Reeves! Vermont! My office." She then commanded. "Now."
Adam pushed off Christopher in an angsty mood whereas Taylor lightly pulled Rya off who was still clinging onto him.
"Sorry." He cringed, "But your nails are like really sharp." I saw the little crescents in his forearm and could tell they hurt by how red they were.
"Shit, sorry." Rya apologised.
Taylor brushed it off and chuckled, "It's okay. I mean, you saved me from getting into more trouble so thanks." He nodded sheepishly before walking after Adam and Principal Cunningham.
As soon as the crowd was gone, I rushed straight up to Rya. "What the hell do you think that was about?"
Rya bit her lip and whispered, "I don't know, but it obviously has something to do with Leah."
❦❤︎❦
After school, Rya had to go to Principal Cunningham's office to replay the events of what happened, meaning I was left alone.
As I collected my things from my lockers and walked to the exit, I noticed Roman chatting with a brunette by his locker. She twirled her hair and chewed on her lip, clearly flirting. Why the hell was she flirting with him? I guaranteed she didn't even know him that well.
I strolled right over there and plastered a fake smile onto my face.
"Casey!" I chirped. "So sorry about your yest infection, but next time, don't stick popsicles up your vagina."
Her face went bright red as she looked back at Roman who was evidently disturbed. "But I didn't –"
"I know, I know. Some girls just like the cold... rush, and I know you used to use carrots but stay away from the food from now on please."
Casey – I presumed that was her name – had tears in her eyes as her face reddened and she ran away.
Roman stared after her before placing his focus back on me. "Does she really...?"
"I don't know." I shrugged. "But from that reaction, I'm guessing yes." Roman shook his head and cringed a little. I swear there was always some weird girl in school that stuck whatever up their who-ha.
As I gazed back at Roman, I noticed the bag heaving under his eyes in tears of purple and blue. How long had it been since he slept? Was he okay?
"You didn't tell me you were coming in today." I finally confessed.
He glanced down at me and sighed, "I didn't realise I was either, but my mom made me. Thanks for dropping off the work though. I don't know what I'd do without you." I don't know what I'd do without you.
"How's she doing?" I couldn't help but ask.
"Alright." He frowned. "But she wants to see you."
"When can I?" I knew they weren't allowing anyone but family to see her in fear someone would come in and supply her diet pills as well as the fact they didn't know if she was – as Roman said the doctors put it – 'stable' enough.
"Not sure." He replied. "Maybe in a couple weeks or so. If I say you're a family friend, you should be fine."
I nodded and hummed in agreement before I realised, "So, are we tutoring tonight?"
Roman's eyes went wide, and I instantly knew he had forgotten. I couldn't blame him. He's been so worried about his sister everything else seemed to slip from his mind.
"Shit, I totally forgot." He blurted. "Sienna, I'm so sorry, it's just –"
"It's okay." I waved it away. "I've got my textbook and so you can always give me something to do whilst you go and sleep. You look like you haven't slept in days." Could he even sleep? With the worry of his sister running around his mind, did he have capacity left to even take a second to relax?
"Thanks, but we can't come round my tonight. My parents have family over to visit Skye and the whole house is buzzing with my nosey relatives. Can we go to yours?"
"No." I answered before I could think. Even if I did think about it, I still would have said no.
"No?" he cocked his head to the side, "Why not?"
"Can't we just go to the library?" I nervously chuckled. "It's alright there. I don't care if anyone sees us." I don't think I've cared of anyone seeing us for a while and I didn't even realise.
"You didn't hear?" he seemed surprised.
I narrowed my eyes in puzzlement. "Hear what?"
"The library's under repair. During the storm, the roof collapsed." The roof... collapsed? The library owned tons of books, I couldn't even imagine how horrible it was for so many of them to be destroyed. My heart ached.
"So, is it alright if we go to yours?" no, it's not alright.
"We can leave tutoring for next week. I don't mind." I turned on my heel to walk away when Roman stalked after me.
"Um, why?"
"Because I said so." I replied, not looking back.
I heard him chuckle in annoyance behind me. "That's not even a proper excuse." I knew it wasn't, but I couldn't think of anything else. Anything I genuinely wanted him to know.
"Just leave it, Roman. We can tutor next week." He ran up behind me and gently grabbed my arm to stop me from walking away.
"Stop pulling away from me." He complained, his voice laced with authority.
"I'm not!" I argued. "You can't force yourself to come round my house."
"I'm not forcing!" he protested. "I'm only asking since we can't go round mine and the library is shut but something is obviously bothering you about the idea, but you won't even tell me what!"
"Maybe some things are just none of your business!" I exclaimed, feeling my blood anxiously pulse through my body.
"I have let you in." he quietened his tone. "I have let you in to see all the good and all the bad. I have let you into things I'd never tell anyone else but you. However, you don't trust me enough to let me see those things in you too?I thought we trusted one another, weren't afraid to let one another see the ugly. Obviously not."
He was right. I hated it but he was right. He had shown me everything, he had let me in and shown me things he's terrified to show others and yet, I push him further away the closer he gets to me. Not because I don't trust him but because I'm... scared.
That's what was what led me to burst. "Fine!" I gave in. He looked back at me and didn't say a word. "We can study round my house." The words terrified me to say, and the fear never left me as we walked over to his car.
Looking back at the school and then to the passenger seat, I knew what all of this meant. This wasn't about showing Roman my house, or my parents, or inside my life. This meant explaining. Explaining things I didn't know if I had the heart to tell anyone again.
___________________________________
❤︎ hello lovelies! Eeee, cliffhanger! I'm sorry but I know what's gonna happen hahaha and I can't wait for you guys to read it! Also... happy 2 month anniversary! It's crazy because this book now has over 100k reads and I can't help but feel so, so, so grateful! x
❤︎ I want your theories! What do you think is going on with Sienna? x
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