"Number Five, where is he?" Cha-Cha asks as she chokes Klaus.
"Don't... stop... I'm almost there," Klaus says, the torture having quite the opposite effect on him.
"Is that a…?"
"Yep," Hazel replies.
"Oh! Ah, there's nothing like a little… stranglin' to get the blood flowin', am I right?" Klaus laughs.
"What is so funny, you asshole?" Hazel asks, slapping the man.
"Ow! Well, for one… you spent the last ten hours… beating me senseless, and… you've learnt absolutely nothing. I mean, nobody tells me shit. The truth is, I'm the one person in that house nobody will even notice is gone. You assholes kidnapped the wrong guy!" He says before getting a slap again. "Ow! I'm sorry, okay?"
"Please make him stop talking."
"Let's waterboard him," Cha-Cha says.
They cover his face with a towel before pouring a bucket of water on his head.
"Ah! Oh, I needed that," Klaus says.
"Come on!"
"I was… so parched. Thank you. Thank you."
"Oh, god, this is brutal," Hazel says as he and Cha-Cha retreat to the bathroom, taking off their masks. "What the hell is wrong with that guy?"
"He's a freak like his brother," Cha-Cha responds.
"Everyone else in that house. Just another example of management stickin' it to the working man."
"Come on, not this again."
"They should've warned as that this was an atypical assignment. Hello? Hazard pay?"
"Come on. We do the job and we move to the next. Just like we always do," Cha-Cha says. "Remember Trinidad? We worked that guy solid for what? Two days, two nights?"
"How could I forget Trinidad?"
"Attaboy. Let's go," She says before putting on her mask.
"All right!" Hazel says, putting on his mask. "Come on, Hazel!"
Timeskip
"What the hell?" Eudora asks as she sees Diego sleeping on her doorstep. "Who'd you piss off this time?"
"I gave it as good as I got," Diego says.
"You didn't answer my question."
"Oh, yes. How's all that paperwork coming along?"
"It's real page-turner. I've got two guys in children's masks, rare bullet casings, a random fingerprint from a 1930s cold case, and… I just learned that the tow truck driver from the donut didn't have any family."
"The boy and girl."
"Not his, apparently. Kids' our only possible witnesses and they're total mysteries," She says. "Okay, what's going on?"
"What?"
"You could have called me for an update. So why are you really here?"
"Nothin', I just, uh… My mom. She died last night."
"Shit, Diego. I'm so sorry. I remember how close you were. Is there anything I can…"
"I just… I don't… I don't know how to…"
"Is that what this is about? Hey. Hey. Tell me what's going on. Who did this?"
"Let's just say I didn't get a good look at their faces."
"You went after the guys in the masks, didn't you?"
"I didn't go after them. And one's a woman… by the way, so stop being so sexist."
"I specifically told you not to follow them."
"No, they came to my house, looking for my brother. They tried to kill my family."
"Why?"
"I don't know. My brother and sister have been missing since yesterday. I need to find them."
"Diego, you need to let me handle this. You're not equipped—"
"Oh, you always loved telling me what I can and can't do. You know, maybe, for once, just try things my way."
"I can't."
"No wonder we didn't last."
"Yep. I'm sorry about your mom, Diego. Really, I am," She says before leaving for work.
Timeskip
"Oh, Jesus!" The doctor says as they spatial jump into his car the next day and Five holds a knife to his throat.
"One chance. That's all you've got. One chance to tell us exactly what's going on in that lab!" Five says.
"I… I manufacture prosthetic devices for fake patients. I bill the insurance companies and then sell them for cash on the black market," The terrified doctor says.
"Are eyeballs included?" Y/n asks.
"Yeah, they're my biggest seller," The doctor says as Five and Y/n nod at each other. "I mean, they sell like hotcakes. I… I've got a list, a waiting list, probably 20 buyers."
"So, the serial number we told you…"
Uh, could've already been bought. Yes, off… off the books."
"We need that list," Y/n says.
"Names and numbers, and we need it now!" Five says.
"I don't have it! I mean, not on me. The only copy's in my safe at the lab."
"Well then. Tick Tock. Start driving," Y/n says before the car starts.
Timeskip
"Like I said, Master Luther, Number Five hasn't lived in this room since he was a boy," Pogo tells Number One.
"Yeah, I know," Luther replies. "But we need to warn him and Y/n. They don't even know we were attacked. They don't know they're looking for him, he doesn't know…"
"What are you doing here?" Diego asks.
"Uh… Do you know about Mom?"
"Well, it looks like you got what you wanted, one way or another, right?"
"Wanna tell me what you're doing here?"
"Looking for Five and Y/n."
"Let me guess, you're gonna save the day."
"It's what I do, asshole."
"Really? Last I checked, you mopped floors."
"And what do you do?" Diego shoots back. "Sit on the moon, for four years, waiting for orders?"
"Boys, this won't help us find Five and Y/n."
"Keep on being a loyal soldier after what our father did to you."
"What? You mean save my life?"
"No, I mean… turn you into a monster," Diego responds before Luther punches the cupboard beside Diego. "Can't hide it anymore, champ."
"He had a difficult decision to make, and he made it."
"Grow up, Luther. We're not 13 anymore."
"That's what leaders do, by the way."
"He sent you on that mission all alone. Almost got you killed."
"Yeah, well, at least he was there. Where were you? You and everyone else in this family? You walked out."
"And thank Christ that I did, or I would have ended up just like you. Let me ask you a question. When you watch one of those nature shows…"
"Diego, please," Pogo says.
"… does it turn you on?"
"So what?" Luther asks. "Is he just an animal to you, too, now, Diego, huh?"
"Don't."
"Enough!" Pogo says. "This house was attacked. We barely got out with our lives. And Grace… she wasn't so lucky. Your brother and sister are missing, and this is how you rise to the occasion? Take your nonsense elsewhere. Now."
"Sorry, Pogo."
"Yeah, sorry, Pogo."
Timeskip
"Maybe you're not hitting him hard enough?" Hazel asks Cha-Cha.
"Me?" She asks. "You're the one with the stupid orthopedic bracelet."
"I told you already, it's just for support."
"Withdrawal," Ben's ghost tells Klaus. "It's starting now, isn't it? Must be. Otherwise, who's the dead babushka?" He asks, hearing the dead babushka ramble on and on in russian.
"I don't know," Klaus tells Ben. "But it's driving me crazy. The bitch won't shut up!"
"Hey! Watch your mouth!" Hazel tells Klaus. "What did I say about eyes front?"
"Stay calm, Klaus," Ben tells Klaus.
"Maybe we're going at this the wrong way," Cha-Cha guesses. "Remember section 76, sub A, of the training manual?"
"I barely remember what we had for breakfast at this point," Hazel responds.
"To paraphrase, torturing works best when you know who you're torturing. Hand me his coat."
"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait..." Klaus says, worried about his drugs.
"Let's see," Cha-Cha says.
"What are you doing? That's mine. That's my personal stuff!"
"Oh! What do we have here?" Cha-Cha asks, holding a small pack of drugs.
"Let me see that," Hazel says, getting tossed the drugs.
"Hey, no, no, no, no. Be… Be careful with that. It's… It's my… asthma medication."
"Now we're getting somewhere," Hazel says, stomping on the drugs.
"Hey… No, hey! Whoa! No, hey, hold on! Hold on! We can have a conversation. We're adults!" Klaus says.
"Okay, you want more?" Hazel asks, stomping on more drugs.
"No! No! No, no, no! Stop! Stop! Please, listen. Listen, I can... I can get you cash. Amputee hookers, whatever. Hey, just, please, just listen. Just don't... No... Please..."
"Chocolate. Mm-mm-mm!" Hazel says, eating it through his mask.
"Please…"
"You want a piece?" Hazel asks his partner.
"You're gonna tell him that it's special chocolate?" Ben's ghost asks.
"Not until they're high as kites," Klaus tells him.
"Klaus, be strong," Ben tells him.
"This could all be yours for the low, low price of telling us everything," Cha-Cha says, waving the chocolate around his head.
"Okay, fine," Klaus says, giving in. "Okay, I don't… I don't know where Five is. I wasn't lying about that. But I can tell you that he's… hasn't… hasn't been making much sense since he came back."
"Elaborate," Hazel says.
"I… uh… He's just… He's been acting like a… a… a lunatic. He's been sitting in this van in front of a… a lab or something, and… looking for the owner of an eyeball. One of those fake ones."
"That makes no sense," Hazel comments.
"Hold on, just hold on," Cha-Cha says. "Tell us more about this eye, and why is it so important?"
"He said it had something to do with the end of times, or something."
Timeskip
By the time Five and Y/n had gotten to the hospital, everything was in flames. Five, bring the absolute idiot that he was, thought that it was a good idea to run to the front just as the entire building exploded.
"Five!" Y/n said, picking the boy up.
"Well, fuck," The boy swears before they left the lab and went to a library.
Five immediately went to a small corner on the top floor as Y/n struggled to keep up. He took out a black marker and started writing equations on some pillars. Y/n shrugged, watching him before leaving. She browsed through some books she found before a drunk Five leaned on her, panting.
"M' tired," Five says, empty bottle in his hand before he passes out.
"Cute," Y/n giggles before putting him in the same corner.
She looked around the library, somehow finding a blanket. She covers Five with it before snuggling by his side.
Timeskip
"I hate sprinkles," Cha-Cha comments, looking at a donut she had barely eaten.
She and Hazel were at Griddy's. The place had been restored to its former glory and customers were coming and leaving again. They were there donuts and drinking coffee as the news of the world ended slowly started to get sucked into their brain.
"Maybe I just hate donuts," Cha-Cha says. "Why are we here again?"
"Refill?" Agnes asks Hazel.
"God, yes, please," Hazel says as his cup was full of coffee again. "Thank you," He says before Agnes hesitatingly refills Cha-Cha's cup before she walks away. "The world is ending," He tells Cha-Cha. "All this, all these… people, they'll be gone and they have… just… no idea."
"This is not about a broken contract!" Cha-Cha realizes.
"What?"
"Five, son of a bitch. He's trying to change the timeline."
"So we're not only going to kill him…"
"We're gonna end the world," Cha-Cha says. "Come on, let's get back to what's his name."