MIND IMPALING
Draco
✩
"How am I supposed to-how do we fucking study for a Muggle Studies test when there's so much going on?" Fred dropped his head in his hands, groaning aloud.
Lately, I had found myself hanging out with the Gryffindors. Elysia being taken had somehow brought us all together-mainly because we spent every waking moment trying to find a way to get her back.
It was hell.
Every waking moment was hell.
More days went by, then more. Potter spent all day with the Marauders, Dumbledore, McGonagall; pleading for answers, pleading for them to tell him what was going on, what they were doing, what he could do to help. The Marauders hardly had a clue themselves what they were going to do. They tried to act as though everything was under control but we knew, we all knew there was nothing but chaos and panic within the walls of Hogwarts.
Whatever plan the Marauders had-some sort of fake exchange, an attempt to kill Samael once they ensured Elysia was safe-it sounded nothing more than a death wish.
They were essentially recreating the same battle for the stone that happened years ago. The battle that almost ended Hogwarts. The battle that took countless lives. The battle that nearly killed them all.
Fucking suicidal fools.
We have to do better.
I wanted to have faith in them, I want to believe that they will save her if the rest of us can't.
But I can't breathe. My lungs physically feel as though they are constricting. I was terrified-if something happened to Elysia before we got to her, if something happened in the crossfire of whatever plan the Marauders had-
I couldn't even finish the thought.
The mere thought made my blood feel as though it were gradually turning to molten lead, withering me from inside out.
I can't lose her.
I won't.
I was not going to lose her before I even entirely had her.
Hermione and Pansy walked into the Great Hall, sliding into the table we sat at. Hermione slammed a large book down.
"You have something?" George perked up, his posture straightening. Hope glistened through his eyes.
Hermione winced lightly. "I-I don't know if it will work. I don't want to get anyone's hopes up-"
"Mione, what is it?" Fred cut her off. "Anything is worth a try."
Hermione took a deep breath. "It's complicated and I do not know if it will work."
"Go on," Potter urged her.
Hermione hesitated for a moment. "Memories are complex. Memories from someone's mind can be extracted or reviewed in a Pensieve. There are charms that can suppress or create new memories-"
"We've had lessons on memory is classes, Granger." I cut her off. "Where are you going with this?"
Hermione grimaced lightly. Whatever this was, she was evidently reluctant about it. "There's a sort of-telepathic way to psychologically read the mind of another being." She paused, for a long moment. Everyone stared at her, waiting for her to continue. "The power is-extremely rare and the people who can preform it, usually can only possess the ability in limited forms."
"And this would tell us where Elysia is?" Ron rubbed the side of his face, confused.
Hermione ran a hand down her face. She looked just as much at a loss, entirely unsure. "Essentially, you would tap into another person's mind. You would see their memories, see what they have seen. You're accessing their memories-which, yes, would tell us where Elysia is. We could see her surroundings and go from there, gathering where she is."
I leaned forward on the table, peering at Hermione thoughtfully. "The Protective Charms-they wouldn't cancel this out?"
Hermione shook her head uncertainly. "From what I've read, it's a further reach than normal magic. You're connecting to someone's subconscious-past focal awareness. It's far deeper, something no charm can exactly hide."
Everyone fell silent.
It did sound like a reach but-it was far more than we had before. It was the surest thing we had so far.
"Do-do any of us even have the ability to do this?" Fred tried to hide his weariness of the idea. He wasn't the only one unsure that this would actually work.
We had heard of extraction, external viewing, and legilimency-but this was more complex. To reach into someone's subconscious from such afar, it almost didn't sound like it could be possible.
Hermione remained silent for a long moment until Potter nudged her, urging her to explain further. "Well-it would be difficult to get the needed materials and-and it does require some-some dark magic."
"What-" Ron sputtered, shaking his head. "Dark magic corrupts your soul. We can't-Elysia wouldn't want us to-"
"Using it one time is worth the risk, Ronald." Hermione sighed deeply. "It's hardly powerful enough to do any damage. One spell, one time-we're not going to turn into Voldemort and lose our noses."
Ron stared at her flatly.
"There's a protective charm," Pansy spoke up. "Essentially, it casts a temporary protection over your soul and it doesn't work for extreme dark magic use but if this is minor-it could work."
"How does it work?" I asked.
Hermione wavered. "Werewolf claws."
"What?" Fred gawked at her. "Where the hell would we get those?"
Hermione shook her head weightily. "I-I have not a clue, Fred-but we need them. Werewolf claws have the ability to see, share, and manipulate memories. Sometimes a dead werewolves claws can even be used to communicate with the owner. The celestial magic from a werewolf essentially-transcends into their claws."
"The potions basement," I sighed. They all looked at me. "Hogwarts-there's a far bigger supply of such things than you'd think."
"We'd never be able to sneak in there and get what we need," Ron mumbled quietly.
"I hear Potter has an invisibility cloak. I reckon that could come of use." I cocked my head to the side, looking at Potter innocently.
"We'll get it," Potter responded quickly. "Tonight. After curfew."
-
We all waited in Hermione's room for Potter and Ron to return with the claws.
My heart raced-praying to all the higher powers in the world that this would work while simultaneously refraining myself from getting my hopes up.
The door opened and Potter and Ron scrambled into the room, pulling the cloak off their heads. "We got it." Potter held up a glass jar filled with ten claws.
Hermione's mouth fell agape as she took the jar, holding it up to inspect the talons inside. "It's-wow."
"What now?"
Hermione exhaled deeply as she pulled out a chair, bringing it to the centre of the room. "I've learnt the spell and all the incantations so I need to be the one wearing the claws. Someone else-whoever has the strongest connection with Elysia is going to have these claws piercing the back of their neck."
Both George and Fred looked utterly horrified. "Piercing into their neck? Isn't that-dangerous?"
Hermione shrugged sheepishly. "It will hurt-that I will warn. As I said, I will wear these nails which will allow me to also see the memories along with whoever is going to connect their subconscious to Elysia's. The same way you focus when using the summoning charm, you have to focus-use all your power, think of Elysia, connect to her, feel her."
"When you're in there-" Pansy spoke. "In your mind, trying to find her subconscious-how do you know you've found it?"
Hermione fell silent for a moment. "I haven't-I haven't done this before. I don't entirely know but from what I've read, there should be a light. A swirling light should illuminate the area-whatever it is, you go to it, you step into it. Whatever the incandescence-that's her subconscious that you need to find and once you do-" Hermione stared at the glass jar, pausing. "Just connect to it. You'll know when you see it. You need to find her memories from there."
"How do you navigate through ones memories?" I scoffed lightly. "If you're in someone's subconscious, that's a lifetime of memories."
"Fight your way through," Hermione answered evenly. "Despite what you all may think, I don't know everything. Find the memories you are looking for. I stress this-do not get distracted. It's like legilimency."
"None of us have done legilimency before, Mione." George ran a hand down his face, flustered and exasperating.
Hermione stared at George flatly, blinking. "And I've never pierced werewolf claws into someone's neck to try to find someone else's memories."
George snapped his mouth shut, backing away. "Very well, then."
Hermione exhaled deeply, glancing between the lot of us standing around her room. "So-who will it be?"
Everyone fell silent.
"I reckon Fred," Ron nodded towards his brother. "They're the closest."
Fred shrugged. "Sounds right to me. She's my best friend, I reckon I will have the best connection."
"Harry could work as well," Ginny offered. "They've known each other the longest, their families are close. Not to mention, they have the same godfather."
Hermione winced.
"What is it?" Fred's eyebrows furrowed. "What's wrong?"
Hermione hesitated. "You are her best friend-and Harry has a long history with her but-an emotional connection would work better."
"We all have an emotional connection to Elysia," Ginny spoke, her voice laced with confusion.
"I think-" Luna piped up quietly, her voice sheepish. "I think Hermione was thinking of someone like-Draco, perhaps."
I sputtered out a laugh, staring between Hermione and Luna in hysteria. "Me? You think I have the best emotional connection with Elysia?"
Pansy nudged me lightly. "You are-in love with her."
I shot her a glare. "No, I'm no-"
"No point lying, Malfoy." Fred shrugged lightly. "We all know it. We can see it. We have been seeing it for years."
I pursed my lips. "A one sided emotional connection is hardly enough."
Everyone fell silent and stared at me. They just stared.
What the hell is wrong with these fucking idiots?
Blaise cleared her throat. "It's-uh-it's not one sided."
"What?" I laughed incredulously.
Fred rolled his eyes, growing impatient. "Mate-she's in love with you too. Are you fucking blind or slow?"
What?
I could hear my heartbeat in my ears. I could nearly feel the floor sliding out from under me.
Time stopped for a moment.
"We don't have time to discuss your overlooked feelings, Draco!" Hermione gawked at me, disbelief evident in her expression. "Will you do it or not?"
I blinked. "What? Oh-yeah, of course."
Please, please work.
I sat down in the wooden chair, my heart racing anxiously. I was afraid that if this didn't work, I would start to spiral into a hopelessness that could very well break me entirely.
I exhaled a shuddering breath.
Hermione opened the glass jar, plucking out the nails. She looked as though she would start trembling in fear. "Draco, I can't stress enough that this will hurt and-"
"I know, Granger."
I would take all the pain in the world, a lifetimes worth if it meant getting Elysia back-alive and back.
"No, Draco, you don't know." Hermione swatted the side of my head to stress her seriousness. "It will hurt, your brain will feel like it's being crushed-which is what is going to make it all the harder to focus but-you need to, Draco. If it's the last thing you do, you need to focus. Don't let your mind stray elsewhere, just think of her. Only her. Block out the pain."
I rolled my eyes. "I've already got that covered, Granger."
"Here." Pansy handed me a necklace-the same necklace that Elysia wore every single day, religiously. In the years I had known her, there was never a day she didn't put it on. "Her mom's necklace, the one she wears."
"It helps to hold an object connected to the person we're trying to connect to," Hermione explained. "At least that's what the books say."
"Great-relying on old books that very well may be full of shit."
Hermione swatted the side of my head again. "If you don't want to do this seriously, get out of the chair, Draco."
I scowled at her, although she was standing behind me and I couldn't see her face. "Shut up, Granger. I'm not going anywhere."
"I brought this," Luna stepped forward, holding out-hair? "I snatched it from the hairbrush in her room. I thought-well DNA seems like the best way to connect to someone, right."
"Perfect! Luna that's perfect. I don't know why I didn't think of such a thing." Hermione took the hair and stepped around the chair. She closed her eyes, murmuring an incantation onto the hair. The hair floated up in the air before turning to ash. Hermione held out her hands as the ash floated down into a pile in her palms.
"What are you doing?"
"Coating the claws in the ash-in her DNA. It will help create a stronger connection." She put the ash in the jar, mixing the claws in them so each talon had some of Elysia's DNA on it. "Before, you were looking for her. Now-her subconscious will simultaneously be finding you. It's like meeting in the middle, essentially using her DNA to plant a seed of her in your subconscious that will help you find her more easily."
I craned my neck over, gaping at her. "I thought you said you haven't done this before."
Hermione tossed me a flat look. "I read a dozen books about this, Draco. Let's just hope I'm right."
Hermione turned the jar, dropping the claws onto her dresser. Her hands hovered above the talons as she quietly murmured incantations. The claws floated up in the air, embedding themselves onto Hermione's fingers.
Hermione craned her head side to side, exhaling deeply. "Here goes nothing." She approached, standing behind me. She took my head into her hands, tilting head down so my chin tucked into my chest. "I'm sorry, Draco. It's going to hurt."
I inhaled sharply, clutching onto the necklace in my hands.
I felt the tips of the claws poking into my skin on the nape of my neck. Quick and swift, Hermione plunged the talons into my neck.
I jerked in the chair, pain piercing through my skull and travelling down my neck, my arms, nearly everywhere. My head grew heavy, pressure forming around my eyes, cheeks, and forehead. My skull was aching, throbbing.
It felt like my entire head was in a machine, slowly compressing further and further until brain matter leaked out of my ears.
It was insurmountable.
If it's the last thing you do, you need to focus. Don't let your mind stray elsewhere, just think of her. Only her. Block out the pain.
Despite the pain, Hermione's words rang through my mind.
Everything was foggy, my head having gone limp. I was no longer conscious but my mind was entirely alert and aware-just elsewhere, somewhere deep, somewhere in my psyche.
I was in a field-or my spirit was.
My head throbbed excruciatingly.
Block out the pain. Only her.
A grassy field, a grey sky. I walked through aimlessly.
You need to focus.
My mind flashed to her. Images of past memories ran through my head like a slideshow.
"So, help me Merlin, if you're messing with me, Malfoy-"
"Shut up and dance with me, Ambrose."
An orb of light flashed. It was blue-a bright blue that matched the colour of her eyes. I walked towards the orb, it growing bigger the closer I got.
Pain rushed through my entire body, causing me to jerk and wince away. My head was killing me. It was agonizing. It made me want to scream.
The orb of blue light grew smaller and smaller, fading.
Only her. Only her. Only her. Focus. If it's the last thing you do.
Elysia. The sound of her delicate laughter filled my mind. I scavenged for any thought of her, any memory. It had been so long since I had seen her face, it almost felt like she were nothing more than a fever dream.
She was drunk. I was taking off the rings she wore. Her hand reached up and touched my face, her touch as light as a feather stroking against my skin. I froze at the slight touch-so minor but it lit every one of my nerves on fire.
Her fingers traced my cheekbones. I mustered every ounce of courage in myself to refrain from grabbing her and kissing her like my life depended on it. She was killing me.
The blue incandescence grew large and bright once again. It looked to be pulsating, glowing as bright as a Patronus.
I followed it.
Only her. Focus.
My grip on her necklace tightened as I got closer and closer to the glowing ball of illumination. I reached a hand out, impulsively.
My fingers hardly grazed the light when I got pulled in, falling right into the orb itself. It was so bright I couldn't see anything-everything had gone white.
It took a moment before the blinding brightness dulled down.
Then, it felt as though I were being pulled through a timeline of flashing images and videos, all flashing by at such a speed I couldn't see anything.
"I think I can tell the right sort for myself." Elysia ignored my outstretched hand. "I don't need help from someone like you, Malfoy."
Our first day at Hogwarts-that was the memory I was seeing.
I was in her memories. This was it.
I was so close I could nearly taste.
Focus. Find the memories you are looking for.
I pulled myself away from that memory. I needed to go much further. I needed to come to her present memories.
We were walking through the dark forest but we were young, much younger. "You could have very well let me fall and left me to get mauled by werewolves, Malfoy."
Another memory played.
Focus. Find the memories you are looking for.
More memories flashed by. Something about this seemed utterly wrong-essentially prying through her head, through her thoughts. That was the biggest invasion of privacy possible.
It was worth it if it meant finding her.
Elysia slammed her textbook shut and stood up. I was watching her, surprise in my eyes. I was recognizing that I had hurt her with my words. "Screw you, Draco. You are a cruel excuse for a human."
Further. I need to go further.
Focus. Find the memories you are looking for.
The memory whirled away in a flash before numerous others played out, seconds of memories, one after the next, some I recognized, some I didn't.
I was making a paper crane when Elysia poked my cheek. Her eyes were lit up-the vision made my heart swell. She was a sight for sore eyes. "Malfoy," her voice was adorably whiny. "Teach me."
Further, Malfoy. Come on.
There were so many memories just beaming past, one after the next. Along with the throbbing in my skull, I was starting to lose focus.
It was too much.
There's too much-my brain felt as though it shrinking, compressing, drying out from the inside.
Only her. Use all your power, think of Elysia, connect to her, feel her.
I see Fred. He was laughing as he patted Elysia's shoulder, rising to his feet. "You're not looking at him when he's looking at you. The rest of us-we're the ones who notice."
A memory I did not recognize.
Not the memory I needed.
She sat in the grass with Blaise. I think Pansy was there too-I could feel Pansy's presence through Elysia's memory as if I were there myself. Blaise shook his head. "No-they just look much brighter-when the sunlight hits them, I mean. I never noticed, they quite match the shade of Forget-Me-Nots."
And then it came-something that felt useful.
A hooded man approached quickly. He was suddenly very close, harshly grabbing her wrist. "Not so fast, are you?"
I was getting closer, I could feel it.
Pain-I could feel pain but it wasn't my own pain. It was her pain. A dagger plunged through her leg, blood oozing out. Her body fell limp into a man with two different eyes, a long scar running across one side of his face, auburn hair. It was Samael. He held her body up, a manic grin on his face. "Perhaps next, we shall take your tongue for a silver one it is."
My blood ran cold. My heart felt like someone was trying to rip it right out of my chest.
We could see her surroundings and go from there, gathering where she is. Focus. Find the memories you are looking for.
The memory changed before I could focus enough to see where she was being held.
Jangling noises. Constraints around her wrists, made of steel and keeping her chained to the ground. An empty concrete room. Airless and cold. There was a tiny window on the far wall, nothing to be seen outside. She's in a basement.
I'm nearly there.
Images flashed past, some going so fast I couldn't make out a single clear picture of where she was taken.
Her eyes blinked open. Someone is carrying her. He's hooded.
He's walking through a long and endless grassy field. There was a small wooden house in the distance, growing bigger the closer they got.
I scanned each inch of the image playing out, trying to find any hint, any clue that would signify where it was she was.
As they got closer to the house, there was a broken sign. Held up on a wooden plank in the ground was a sign that was hanging on by one nail.
'OWS' it read, mostly covered in dirt with the letters chipping but they were bold and big enough for me to be able to interpret what the sign read.
My body jerked forward in the chair.
I know where she is.