"Oh, this is good. Oh, this... look at this one. Oh, it's so timeless. It's perfect." Rachel cooed looking through wedding magazines.
"Yeah, timeless, meaning you can wait two or five years to wear it." Kurt said.
"Don't be jealous Kurt, im sure you'll be a very pretty bride too." I said sipping on my juice.
"Well, well, well. If it isn't a young Barbra Streisand and an old Betty White. Oh and look at you scarface. Where is Gay Cyclops? Still trying to stumble his way in?" Sebastian asked.
"We can't come here anymore." Kurt mumbled.
"Wheres your little minion Shawn?" I asked.
He twitched his neck and said, "Jeff failed me, but that doesn't concern you. Rachel, I, uh, brought an engagement gift for you."
"Hmm." She hummed as she opened the manilla folder and took out the paper.
"Whoa. Oh, whoa, whoa! Oh, my God! Oh, no, that is... that is Photoshopped. His thing is not that small or... or brown."
"And he could never fit into those pumps." I added.
"Just think, from now until eternity, every time someone Googles Finn Hudson, they'll be treated to that and dozens just like it. That's the beauty of the Internet. It stays with us forever." I took a quick picture of Stank-ass-tian and found a nude picture to crop his face on.
"What do you want, Sebastian?" Rachel asked.
"I want a guaranteed Regionals win, so I want you to drop out. McKinley gets home-court advantage this year. You're going to come down with Asian bird flu or whatever Tina Blowing-Wang just had."
"But that is show choir terrorism." Rachel said.
Kurt glared at the boy. "You give a bad name to the entire gay community."
Sebastian rolled his eyes. "And you give the gay community cutting-edge fashion that's usually only seen on Puerto Rican pride floats."
Kurt smiled fakely and said "I'm sorry... I didn't hear you. I was distracted by your giant horse teeth."
I giggled and finished up my editing. "You have 24 hours to drop out, Rachel, or I press the upload button."
I stuck my phone out and said, "And you have 24 hours to get rid of the picture or I upload this one." He looked flushed but walked out. "Two can play at this game."
~~~~~~~~~~
"That's it. I'm done. I'm leaving this classroom, and I'm going to beat that Sebastian kid's ass!" Finn said looking at the photo.
"Me too!" I chirped getting up only to be pulled down into Quinns lap.
"Finn, chill." Mr Shue said stopping the boy.
"No, I'm not going to chill. I... I'm done chilling." He demanded.
Just then Sam rolled Artie in as he said, "The official show choir rule book states that "any real or perceived threat of violence, vandalism or humiliation will be met with a swift and unquestioned disqualification of the threatening party's team with extreme prejudice." It's right here. Page 72, by-law 15, section six, article 44."
Mr Shue sighed and said "Guys, I contacted the headmaster of Dalton."
I furrowed my eyebrows and looked at Blaine. "Like you did when Sebastian almost blinded my little brother?"
He nodded and said, "What did they do then? Same thing as they're going to do now... nothing."
Rachel stepped in and said, "Look, none of this matters now anyways, okay? We're not going to let him beat us like this. I'm going to perform at Regionals."
I widened my eyes leaning back into Quinns embrace.
"Even if he's going to post a photo like this of me if you do?" Finn asked.
Rachel huffed and stood up, "Finn, I'm not going to negotiate with terrorists."
"If someone posted a picture like that of me online, I'd probably kill myself." Sugar said straight faced.
"Twice to be sure I was dead." Rory said.
"Three times just as a precaution. MAYBE even four." I added. Quinn flicked my forehead. "Ow." I said with a pout.
"Look, you guys are just going to have to deal with things like this. The more successful you get, the more garbage people are going to make up about you. They're going to love to tear you down." Mr Shue said.
"Im sorry Mr Shue but this is high school, you realize a picture like that could interfere with Finn getting into college. He wouldn't even be able to get fame if a picture like that brought him down to nearly nothing." I said.
Mr Shue only shook his head at me. Girl okay.
"I can't believe you would do that to me." Finn said still shocked.
"I'm going to be married to you. Don't you think I'm going to suffer the consequences as well? I mean, I just... I don't care about stuff like that. I love you, and we'll... we'll manage this together. Okay, the important thing right now is that we win." Rachel said trying to make peace.
"So you wouldn't care if I Photoshopped a photo of you like this and put it on the Internet?" Finn asked.
"Look, our future depends on us winning Regionals. It'll help me towards my NYADA application."
He nodded and said, "Hmm. Hope you get in." He walked out of the room.
"Finn." She called.
"I got it." I said walking out the door to find him.
"Sometimes she can be a little conceited." He said sensing my presence.
"Yeah, maybe more than sometimes but your gonna marry her so you might wanna get used to it."
He shook his head as I sat down. "I just- I cant believe she would do that to me you know? She hasn't even auditioned for NYADA yet why is she worrying about it so much."
I shrugged. "Im not sure, but you know Rachel. She's persistent she doesn't care whats in her way she just wants to get to the finish line, even if it means hurting the people she loves the most. Just give it time bud."
He sighed and put his head on my shoulder. "Your right."
~~~~~~~~~~
"So I want to talk to you about something?" Quinn said to me.
"are you breaking up with me?" I asked scared.
"No no no baby no. I-Uh how would you feel if I joined the cheerios again?" She asked.
"Well I would first be proud of you, secondly id be excited cause I get to look up your skirt and three its not really up to me cause it's your decision but id support you regardless."
She smiled at me. "Your so dirty, but thank you."
I shrugged. "I can get down in the dirt."
She giggled and said, "If the dirt is me yes yes you can."
I hummed and kissed her forehead after moving her hair out of the way. "Have I ever told you how pretty you are?" I asked her.
She blushed so hard and said, "You have but I wouldn't mind hearing it again."
I chuckled and pulled her into my embrace. "You are the prettiest woman I have ever seen in my 18 years of living baby." I rested my chin on her shoulder.
"Even Scarlett Johansson?" Quinn asked.
"Even Scarlett Johansson." I assured.
She hummed against my neck before saying, "And Elizabeth Olsen?"
"Oh baby your pushing it." I teased.
She bit my neck getting the opposite of what she expected out of my mouth. "Did you just moan?" My face went red as she laughed at me. "Can I come over tonight after your first game?" She asked twirling my hair with her finger.
"Oh please do."
"Speaking of I got everyone to cancel their plans and be there and of course my moms coming too. She's more excited than I am I think. You know she played softball in high school."
"The Judy Fabray?" I asked.
"Yes the Judy Fabray. Its how she met my dad. He was on the football team and she was a softball player."
I nodded, "Interesting. I had no idea."
"Now ya know babe."
~~~~~~~~~~
In my uniform repping number 13 I stood on the mound. Im ready to throw my first practice pitch infront of my friends. Blaine knows me, he knows how good I am but none of the rest of them do. Today is the beginning of a new era. A new me. Im excited beyond words.
Everyones in the stands, Quinns got 1 and 3 on her cheeks and there are at least four signs just for me, with Judy holding one of them. I couldn't be happier.
"Ready?" Thena asked coming up to me with her helmet in her hand and her glove under her arm.
I let out a deep breath and nodded, "yeah." She smiled at me and we did our handshake that we made up at last practice.
Both feet on the rubber to start I spat out one of my seeds and went through my wind-up for a change up. And boom. Nailed it right down the middle. I could've swore I heard Puck yell, "Damn!"
After a few more pitches Thena called, "balls in coming down!" Which basically is a throw down to second base after a pitch.
I went through my routine and than ducked. Then threw perfectly to lacy and Shannon who backed her up. Lacy tossed the ball behind her to Shannon who threw it to Cam than she threw to Kylie who put eh ball in my glove. "Alright ladies, first game. We got this. Fuck shit up, make a mistake, shake it off, make another one and charlies coming in."
"And we dont want that." Mads said with a nod.
"Yes ma'am." Cam said before we dispersed. Shannon stayed back a second to give me a fist bump. Im nervous as hell but I know with Quinn and them cheering me on ill do great.
"Batter up!"
Well here goes nothing. First pitch Ms Wilson wanted a curve so I did just that.
"Strike!"
And another
"Strike!"
And one more
"Strike!"
Thats one down. I stayed in my circle but looked over to Quinn who was jumping up and down with the rest of the glee club. After two more outs and zero hits its our turn up at bat. We huddled before we went into the dug out. "Good looks kid." Coach Wilson said to me with a pat on my back as she went over to third base.
I nodded with a smile before saying, "Lets get some hits ladies! Hits on three, 1, 2, 3... HITS!"
Athenas up first, dinked one right past the short stop. One person on first as Lizzie gets up to bat, bunts down the third baseman line and gets out but advances Athena to second. Lacys up next and she popped one up in right which became our second out and Athena didnt tag so she's still at second. Now its my turn. I stood just out side the box and tapped my bat against the either of my cleats and touched the mask of my helmet twice looking over at Quinn. She blew me a kiss as I stepped in the box.
I took the first pitch.
"Ball!"
Second one was a horrible call.
"Strike!"
That had me pissed, so I took it out on this next one landing it right in the gap and the center and right fielder had no idea how as supped to get it as I get just past second and slid into third as Athena was already home. 1-0 us.
Everyone was roaring especially the glee club. This had gone on all game, I didn't get a no hitter but we shut them out 13-0. One hell of a successful first game.
~~~~~~~~~~
Kurt and I were asked to join Blaine in the auditorium so we walked in seeing his back turned to us. "You okay bro?" I asked.
"You seemed upset. And if Sebastian thinks..."
"Forget about Sebastian!" He snapped scaring me a little but he took in a deep breath.
"I'm not mad at either of you. I just... don't want to waste any more time on him. I-I want to focus on winning. I've got a new song I want to try out. The theme for Regionals is "Inspiration," and I think this fits the bill. You want to hear it?" We both nodded and sat down as Kurts phone rang. He ignored it and Blaine started to sing.
Cough Syrup by Young the Giant sung by Blaine Anderson
During the middle of the performance my phone went off. I looked at the caller ID and it read, 'Karofsky' "I gotta take this." I said to Kurt answering the phone and walking out the auditorium.
"Hey Karofsky, whats up?" I asked with a smile until I heard sniffles. "Dave, whats going on?"
"Im so sorry." He cried. "Im so so sorry Isabella"
Obviously I got fucking worried. "Dave listen to me okay? Where are you?"
His sobs shook me through the phone. "I cant I c-cant!" He yelled.
"Dave tell me where you are okay? Lets talk face to face. Just you and me okay you can trust me."
"No. I have to go Bella. Its better this way. Im so so sorry. I cant do it."
"Dave you ca-" he hung up. He hung up. I ran with tears in my eyes yelling, "No! No! No!" Suddenly out of no-where Ms Willson and Mr Shue held me back, "Let me go! I need t-to save him! Stop it!" I screamed thrashing around.
"Calm down!" Mr Shue urged.
"No! Let me GO!" I screamed as people started to surround us. "Let me go! Stop it Stop it!" I cried falling to my knees.
"Isabella?" I heard Lizzie as her and a few of the other girls rushed to me.
Sobbing into my hands Miss Pillsbury knelt to the ground beside me. "Whats happening?" She asked me.
"Its Dave."
~~~~~~~~~~
After hearing from the school that Dave truly had attempted and is in the hospital broke my heart. I couldn't be alone. I wouldn't leave myself alone. I didn't trust myself. "Come to bed baby." Quinn said sitting on the edge of my bed.
"I need to shower." I said at a whisper.
"Do you want my help?" Quinn offered following me to my bathroom.
"I-" I turned from looking to the mirror over to my girlfriend. "Yes please." I asked. I was afraid of what I might've done. "I need you." I said shaking at the sight of my strained eyes in the mirror.
She wrapped her arms around me from behind. "He'll be okay honey. Just focus on me and my voice." She said in a soothing tone.
I nodded as she slipped her hands under my shirt, "Can I take your clothes off or do you want to do it?"
Taking in a shaky breath I said, "Could you help me?"
She nodded, "Of course honey." I raised my hands and she carefully lifted off my shirt. Unhooking my bra she kissed along my shoulders. "My girl." She whispered against my skin. "Can you sit on the edge of the bath for me darling?" She asked. I nodded and sat down. Slipping her hands under the top of my shorts she pulled them down and off my feet before my underwear she placed soft kisses up my thighs to my stomach up my chest to my neck. "Your so beautiful." She said to me before turning on the shower. She quickly undressed and helped me stand up. She turned on some soft music and as we waited for the water to warm she wrapped her arms around my naked waist and rocked me back and forth to the song. "I love you princess."
I rested my head against her shoulder, "I love you too Quinnie." I said clinging our naked bodies together.
"We're gonna get through this as a team okay?" She assured me.
"As a team." I confirmed letting out a sigh as I closed my eyes for a second.
~~~~~~~~~~
I made sure to stay with Blaine at all times and he made sure to stay with me too. Sitting with the God squad I had my head on Blaines shoulder just staring at Quinns hand in my lap. "We should start today's meeting by praying for Karofsky. That he finds peace and that he feels better." Mercedes said.
"I think we should start today's meeting by praying for his family. They could use comfort more than he could." Sam said.
"I just will never understand how anyone could get to such a horrible, dark place." Lacy said with a sad expression. Truthfully she had no idea who Dave Karofsky was but she had dealt with this first hand. That I had zero idea about. But she'll get more into that later.
"It's all over Facebook. A couple of kids from Karofsky's new school saw him at Breadstix with Kurt on Valentine's Day. They posted mean stuff on his page and texted everyone that he was gay. He couldn't take it." Cededs said sadly.
"How is he? Is he going to live?" Joe asked.
"Well, he's in the hospital, but thank God his dad found him in time." Blaine said.
Sam shook his head "I feel sorry for Karofsky, but what he did was selfish. He didn't just want to hurt himself; he wanted to hurt everyone around him. I went through the wringer, but I never got to that place."
Then I uttered my first words today, "Sam, please. Sure, you lost your house and you had to move to Kentucky, but seriously? The world never stopped loving you. And you're doing fantastic now. You have no idea what Karofsky was struggling with. You really want to try to compare..."
"The despair, the self-loathing. It doesn't matter. I just can't imagine things getting so messed-up that you would consider taking your own life."
I could feel Lacy rolling her eyes. If only I had known. I wouldve said something to Sam.
I shook my head as Kurt walked in, "That is so harsh and reductive. Have some compassion. Do you know what they're still writing on his Facebook? "Better luck next time" and "Try, try again.' "
"Why are you even here, Kurt? Thought you didn't believe in God." Sam said.
"He asked me if he could come, and I invited him." I said softly. Quinn kept her protective eyes on me.
"I heard you guys were praying for Karofsky, and... after everything that we've been through, I didn't have anywhere else to go. I feel responsible. He asked me out, and... I said no. And he kept calling me... If I'd just answered one of those stupid calls..." I stood up and walked out as my brain began to cloud. I couldn't take it.
I walked into Miss Pillsburys office with tears running down my face. "You don't have a s- Oh honey. Whats wrong?" I tried to breathe but I couldn't. She quickly took out the inhaler I was instructed to give her and she handed it to me. "Whats going on?" she was hesitant but she placed her hand on my back.
"If I had just walked a little bit faster. Just two seconds. He would've been okay. He wouldn't be in this position. I saw him last week and he looked off he did but he wouldn't let me in. I tried to talk him out of it when he called me but he wouldn't let me in." I sobbed leaning into her. She was hesitant again but allowed it. This week cant get any worse.
~~~~~~~~~~
Little did I know...
"Excuse me Mr Shuester." Lizzie walked up to the History teacher with Lacy, Kylie, and Charlie just behind her.
The man looked up from the papers, "Hello Ladies, Is there something I can do for you?"
"We want to join glee club." Kylie said with a nod. "We know it might be too late and were not looking for solos or anything we just want to be with our friend right know while she's going through a hard time and well all of us will be here next year too so its kind of like an investment."
"Regionals is this week. If you're willing to duel softball and catching up to the glee club we would love to have you. Is that something you girls can do?"
They all really looked at Charlie who was fixating on what chips she wanted to eat next, sour cream and onion or barbecue. "Ahem." Lacy said giving her a nudge.
"Oh yeah fa sho." She said looking up at the man.
"Great. See you ladies at rehearsal."
~~~~~~~~~~
I sat between Quinns legs as she held onto me protectively. I dont know why we're here or what the point is. Or frankly why Monty, Freshie, Ky, and Charlie are here.
"Mr. Shue, why do you have a jar of peanut butter with one spoon? And why are they here?" Mercedes asked pointing at the girls who were sat next to Rory.
"Yeah, there are 15 of us here, and I'm only comfortable sharing a spoon with about half of you." Sugar says making some of the glee club laugh.
"Well, it's come to my attention that our good friend Rory Flanagan has never tasted peanut butter." Mr Shue says completely ignoring the second part of the question. "Rory, if you don't mind." Mr Shue gives him the peanut butter and the spoon as she takes some.
"Oh, God... Oh, my God... That's the best thing I've ever had." Rory says making everyone else laugh but me and Kurt.
"Im still confused why theyre here though." Puck said pointing at the four girls. Yeah me too.
Mr Shue smiled and said, "Well Puck these four ladies are our newest additions to the Glee club." That actually made me smile. "They thought they were be great additions and I couldn't agree more."
"Mr. Shuester, while, the peanut butter thing is incredibly moving, and new teammates is amazing, its been kind of been an emotional week for some of us." Kurt says.
Than Quinn asked, "Yeah, Mr. Shue, what's the point of all this?"
"The point is Rory just had a brand-new experience, something as simple as peanut butter. And these young girls are going through this brand new experience. Glee club. Y-You guys are young. I want you to promise me that, no matter how depressed you get, no matter how hopeless or alone you feel, you'll try your best to imagine all of the amazing experiences you have ahead of you." Mr Shue says slowly.
Mercedes speaks up "Mr. Shue, look, I know we're a little dramatic sometimes, but I don't think anyone will ever consider taking their own life."
Blaine looked over at me I looked down at the rings on Quinn and I's tangled fingers. I dont know how many people actually know this but..."9th grade." I say out of no where. "About a year after my grandpa passed. I sat in my bathroom and stared at my razor. I didnt think anyone was home so I took the razor and threw it against the wall. It felt like a bomb went off as it broke. I picked up the blade and tore through my skin. The last thing I remember was s-seeing Blaine covered in my blood as he cried. It all went black and thats when I woke up in a hospital. I kinda owe my life to West Lima Hospital."
"Is that true?" Finn asked with tears in his eyes.
Blaine took out a piece of paper from his pocket. "You forgot to mention the letter." I completely forgot about that. Tears pour down my face as I see the blood stains on the paper but it was still fully intact. I hear sniffles from behind me and see Quinns red face and messed up make up. She held me tight and Blaine asked, "Can I read it?" I nodded. His shaky hand opened the paper but he shook his head. "Im sorry I cant."
"Ill do it." Santana said slowly, taking the paper out of Blaines hand. "Dear Blaine, I know its been a long road you and I, 13 years to be exact. You've been my best friend through it all. You're the best brother ever and nothing could change that. You always knew how to make me smile, make me laugh, and make me cry. (The good cry) I write this letter to you to tell you that I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm leaving you. I never wanted it to be this way." She chokes on her tears but continues "Things just got too much for me. Theres no turning back now. By the time you get this I'll be long gone. Ill be watching over you and Cooper. I don't want you to cry. I want you to know that I'm not in pain anymore. I'm free of my thoughts that have been haunting me for a while now. I may be young but I've only known what happiness was when I was with you or pops. I couldn't get to you this time and Im sorry. I want you to tell Jesse and Melissa" I shivered at the mention of her name. "-that I'll miss them too. Ive been breathing far too long. Why do they call it living if I feel numb all the time? I feel nothing but pain. I want to end my pain and suffering. Please don't hate me. Remember me for who I was not what I did. Ill love you until the sun explodes. I have loved nothing and no one more than I have loved you brother. Say my name till the end of time. I may not be there but keep me alive. Goodbye Blainey days, until we meet again. I'm sorry. With all the love in the world, Signed Isabella A."
Everyone stared at me with hurt in their eyes. "That day, I promise you, it felt like it was the end of the world. But you know what? It wasn't. You know, for some of you, you can handle it. But there's something... everyone has something that might take them up to that edge. And look at all the things I would've missed out on. I would've never met most of you guys. I would've missed out on everything. Knowing now that I wouldn't have met the love of my life It hurts." I squeezed Quinns hand. "Don't think about my mistake. Think forward. Don't do. What I. Did. You could have a million reasons to go but you only need one to stay." I choke out.
Everyone stayed silent for a few minutes wiping their tears. Quinn kept her sniffles to herself or well she cradled her head into my neck and let out her choked sobs. "Im here baby. Im not leaving you." I whispered to her scratching the back of her neck. she always calmed down when i did that but this was just a little much for her. "I got you Lucy. I'm right here."
"Uhm." Lacy said softly. "Ive never thought of taking my own life, I am very fortunate to not struggle with the things that some of you do but my older brother, Chase Meyers-"
"Holy shit." Puck said. "I knew you looked fuckin familiar. That dude was your brother?" The young girl nodded.
"Lace, what is he talking about?" I asked.
"Chase ended his life driving a hundred miles per hour on the other side of the highway. Head first into a semi truck. He took his own life, and twelve other innocent peoples lives." Ho-ly Shit. "I Uhm never talk about it, my parents keep trying to just get rid of him like he never existed because of what he did and I mean I guess I understand it but he was my big brother a-and I hate him for leaving I hate him for what he did but I cant shake off that he was a good man. He loved me, he supported me, I only ever knew the good side of him. I never knew the Chase that wanted to hurt himself. My family t-they call him a murderer. We've been forbidden to speak about him or grieve him, I don't even know where his grave is. I guess this whole thing with this kid I never even knew hurt so bad because he made it out, he gets to heal but all Chase has ever done was inflict pain."
"I read he killed a whole family getting back from a trip." Puck said.
Lacey nodded, "Yep, the Fraziers, 30 year old Caroline, 32 year old Steve, 7 year old Kathleen, and 2 year old Natasha. The grandparents sued us. They won obviously, we lost our house and moved to Lima from Akron. I-It's cheaper here."
Mr Shue said with a sigh, "We are all very sorry about your loss Lacy. This is a safe space, would anyone else like to say anything?"
"Im so sorry Lacy." Blaine said wiping tears. "I kind of know what you went through. Ive never talked about how this affected me but I trust you all enough to share this." He turned to me. "When I saw you laying there. All that blood. I was sure you were gone. I thought in every damn way that you weren't coming back. Even seeing you in a hospital bed I hated you. I hated you with every fiber of my being. I thought, 'Why does she get to leave? Without a goodbye? Thats not right.' But abuela got there and kicked me out of the room. I waited and waited for mom or dad or Cooper to show up. They never did, and than I got it. I got why you wanted to leave. I got why you hated life so much. I-I was too young to understand but I understand now. You were raising me, you didnt know how and it wasn't your job to know how. We didnt have mom around, we didnt have dad, you didnt even have Cooper. Pops wasn't good at teaching us to grow up he just wanted us to have fun. You weren't capable of teaching me to grow up. You had no one but an annoying theatre kid for a little brother. I was an unapologetic annoying. After that, after seeing you recover I knew you needed the love so I taught myself how to grow up in those months. I needed to take care of you now, not you take care of me. I resented you but that resent turned into love and Lacy im sorry you never got to experience that but I cant confidently say that seeing my sister grow wasn't painful. She's relapsed and relapsed, I may sound like a dick but I wanted to give up. Damn if you wanted to go to that bad than just fucking do it but you're here Bella and im so happy you are."
All I could do was nod. I didnt know what to say. I hadn't ever heard this from him. I needed to process it.
"My cousin." Rachel started to say. "She tried, failed every time thankfully I-I guess? Ive never truly understood ho two take in something like that. Whether or not is selfish to take your own life. I just dont get it."
"I think its selfish." Sam said.
"I think your fucking stupid." Lizzie said out of no where. She immediately covered her mouth. "Oh my god im so sorry I didnt mean to say that out loud. I just I think you're the selfish one making someone live in such pain just for you? If they're in misery they shouldn't have to live just because it'll pain you, they're in so much more pain."
"Yeah man, their life their choice." Charlie said giving the blonde a glare.
After that it was just silence. I couldn't really think. I cant even imagine what anyone else is thinking.
Mr Shue is the first to speak "right now, I want you all to think of something that you're looking forward to. Big things."
Sam is the first to respond "Someday, I want to earn enough money to buy my folks a new place, so they don't ever have to go through losing their home again."
Mercedes next "I'm most looking forward to meeting Rachel Berry's children." Everyone lets out a laugh and so does berry.
Than Artie "I want to be there to see my kid's first steps."
Sugar "I want to be there to see Sex and the City Part III."
"Wow." Charlie breathe out as everyone lets out a light laugh
"I'm sort of embarrassed to admit it, but I really do want to graduate high school." Puck says.
Finn next "I'm gonna petition the Army to change my dad's dishonorable discharge status to an honorable one."
Quinn "I'm looking forward to graduating from Yale at the top of my class and staring a family with the love of my life."
I smiled at her as Santana said, "I'm looking forward to the day when my grandmother loves me again."
"I want Lord Tubbington to kick his Ecstasy addiction. And I want to stay with Santana." I look at Britt and smile.
Blaine says "I am looking forward to marriage equality in all 50 states and being with my sister for the rest of my life." I reached my hand out to his holding it.
Than mike spoke "I'm looking forward to the first time I dance at Carnegie Hall."
"I just want a song." Tina says making everyone laugh.
"I'm looking forward to watching my dad make a difference in Congress." Kurt smiles
"I'm looking forward to being friends with all of you for the rest of my life and hopefully getting to know our new recruits" Rachel says honestly
"UHm Im looking forward to becoming an actress." Lizzie said with a smile. An actress? Interesting.
"I look forward to becoming one of the first Female presidents and help change how this country looks at such topics like mental health, abortion, equal rights, religion, and frankly I want to change the corrupt side of the police force." Lacy said confidently. Thats something she can attain.
Charlie smiled and said, "I dont really know what I want other than a second bag of chips and maybe winning states with the softball team this year from the bench."
"Hell yeah sista!" Lizzie said giving her a high five making most of the group laugh.
"I know this sounds silly, and the peanut butter really is amazing, Mr. Shue, but do you know what I'm looking forward to? Winning at Regionals." everyone smiles and cheers at Rorys comment.
"What about you Bella?" Mr shue asks.
"Well I want to go to the Army with my best friend, come home to my wife and kids as they tell me their stories about how their uncle Blaine tried to get them to join the local musical." Everyone laughed as Quinn peppered kisses over my face. I saw Mr Shue with a weird look on his face. Whats that about?
~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~
"Hi." I said to Carole at the door. "Uhm Finns not here?" I said confused as to why she was here.
"I know I just wanted to come see how you were doing, Kurt told me you weren't doing so well."
"Oh okay, come in. Do you want a water?"
She shook her head. "No thank you." I nodded and I sat down on the couch and she followed. "How are you doing?" She asked.
I shrugged. "Not too good."
"Would you like to talk about it?"
I sighed and said, "God do I hate him for what he put Kurt through, I do but I feel so guilty. He looked so off when I ran into him at breadstix the other week. I wrote my number on his hand but the look. That damn look on his face. Id seen it a million times in the mirror. The sleepless nights with bags under his eyes and the rushed walk and talk conversation. I knew something was up and I should've done more. When he called me I should've left immediately but I didn't. He would be perfectly fine if I had just left not two seconds before I did. I-I could've h-helped him." I broke down in sobs and she quickly mothered me.
"Its okay honey. He'll be okay and so will you. Let it out." After a while, I surely let it out. She handed me a tissue.
"Thank you." I said softly.
"You know what I think your problem is?" She said out of the blue.
"What?" I asked confused.
"Im going to be straight, and thoughtful like any mother would be." I nodded. "You always try to be the hero. You can't help everyone Bella."
"But I love helping everyone."
She laughed and nodded, "Oh I know but sometimes, not all the time. Its best to let people figure things out on their own or they will never learn."
~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~
"I need you to come with me." Blaine said as I walked out of the bathroom. He had a smile on his face taking me off guard.
"If its mom I dont want it."
He quickly shook his head. "No no, thats not it."
I walked into the choir room. Finn and Quinn were standing in the middle of the room. "Whats going on?" I asked sitting down next to Tina and Rory.
"You have done so much for us." Finn paused. "You shared your story with us, you practically shared your life with us. You have done way too much for us and we haven't properly thanked you."
Quinn nodded and said, "You are the best thing thats ever happened to me and you are... I cant even formulate words to describe how I feel for you. Im so so proud of you and so is everyone else. We want to thank you which is why we decided. Unanimously. That your getting the solo at regionals."
I looked around. "A-are you sure?" I asked Mr Shuester.
"Ive never been so sure."
"What if we lose?" I asked worried. "Than we loose as a team." Rachel said with a smile.
I looked around once more before saying, "But i don't deserve this."
Quinn looked at me softly. "You deserve the world, this is just a little sentiment. I believe in you, we all do." She said with a nod.
"Okay." I said softly. "Ill do it."
~~~~~~~~~~
I am sweating so hard. This is really a lot for me. Especially now. I fixed my bowtie and suspenders as I walked out of the girls bathroom. "You look great." a voice said.
"Thanks Jeff." I said walking away.
"You know that wasn't me-"
"I know. I just need more time." He nodded understandingly.
He was about to say something else but "Piss off mate." Was heard just behind me. That lovely British accent.
Jeff just walked away as I turned around. "Athena. To what do I owe the pleasure?" I asked.
"Ive kind of been a prick and I wanted to apologize for my behavior. I am here to support you."
"Well thank you I appreciate it." I said with a light smile.
"Go kick some ass." She said with a nod and walked past me.
I walked into the auditorium, great so okay everyones here. This solo has got me anxious. I mean I did them with the warblers but this is just so much pressure. Its my last year. Kurt, Rachel, and I are riding on this for NYADA. That is if I choose to go. I sat down next to Quinn taking in a deep breath. "Are you ready baby?" She asked flattening her dress.
"Im as ready as Ill ever be." I said leaning over pecking her lips.
"And now, let's meet our judges for the 2012 Midwest Regionals! Deputy Zoning Commissioner Melba Jackson-Wright! President of the Ohio Plumbers Union Local 109, Mr. Harl Beindorf! And Central Ohio's number one late-night horror movie host... Svengoobles! And now, from Westerville, Ohio, the Dalton Academy Warblers!"
I clapped for the warblers and tried to focus on what I needed to focus on. I was stressed, I won't lie. It was a lot. If I dont clutch this then no Nationals and thats it for glee club the rest of my high school years.
"Come with me." Quinn whispered standing up. We walked into the hallway and she placed a hand on my cheek. "Your nervous." She said.
"How'd you know?"
She smiled at me and said, "I know everything about you princess. I know that face, and I know you play with your fingers or well in this case you play with mine when your nervous. Or the way that your leg bounces three times before you stop and count to two and than you repeat it. Not to sound creepy but I watch you when your not looking." I smiled and looked down but she quickly brought my head back up to meet hers. "I want you to look at me. You are strong. Your going to kill this song. there is nothing, you, Isabella Renee Anderson, cannot handle. We are here to catch you if you fall you hear me?" I nodded as she wiped a tear from my cheek. "He's gonna be okay baby." She pulled me in for a much needed hug. It helped a lot.
We stayed out the remainder of the performance and the others performance. She calmed me down and stayed with me. Mr Shue nudged his head for us to follow him into the choir room. "Are you okay?" Finn asked popping up beside me.
"Yeah ill be good."
"Your gonna rock this bells you always do."
I smiled at him. "Thanks finn."
"Are you ready for this?" He asked with his fist out.
I bumped it, "As ready as you are brother."
"Those Golden Goblet madrigal singers were way better than I thought they'd be." Noah said from beside me.
"Are you high? I couldn't hear their instruments at all." Britt said.
"All right, guys, listen up. Don't let them get into your heads, okay? Stay focused on what we do best. Show circle time, come on, let's huddle up!" Mr Shue said.
"Okay, uh... Oh, Finn, you wanted to start us off?" The boy nodded as I snuck in between Sam and Mike.
"Yeah. I know it's kind of short notice, but... after the competition, Rachel and I are going to get married." I widened my eyes "At the Justice of the Peace, at the Lima Municipal Center. There will be some light refreshments afterwards, My dads and I were rolling finger sandwiches all night long."
"With everything that's happened lately, we thought a lot about what Mr. Shue said. We didn't want to wait anymore. We just want to live every day like it's our last." Finns said with an assuring nod.
"So we wanted to thank a lot of you guys that were supportive of our decision to get married. And-and for those of you who maybe weren't the biggest fans of our impending nuptials, we thank you also. So after we win, we would really love it if all of you would come to our wedding." Rachel smiled at Quinn kind of singling her out.
Finn took a deep breath, "Alright anyways, lets bring this place down! Come on, bring it in!" We all put our hands in and said, "A... mazing!"
"You got this." Noah said patting my back as we were called to the stage.
"T-Thanks Puck." He smiled and walked to the other side of the stage. I peeked out from the curtain and caught wind of Jeff. He smiled at me and I looked over to Burt and Carole who both gave me a big thumbs up. I smiled at them and suck my head back behind the curtain.
"So they gettin married? What the hell?" Charlie said coming up to me.
"Yeah I dont really completely get it but like whatever."
"Word, word."
Fly/I Believe I can Fly by Nicki Minaj and Rihanna/man who shall not be named sung by the New Directions
What doesnt kill you (stronger) by Kelly Clarkson performed by the Trouble Tones
It was my turn and I stood center stage as the piano tune started to play.
Rise Up by Andra Day sung by Isabella Anderson and the New Directions
"For David Karofsky"
~~~~~~~~~~
We stood with the Warblers and the Golden Goblet girls on stage. Gosh this is so nerve-racking. "I've crossed oceans of time to bring the results of this show choir competition. In third place, from Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow, the Golden Goblets!" Quinn squeezed my hand and Blaine put his hand on my shoulder. "And now... the moment you've all been waiting for. The 2012 Midwest Regional Champion from McKinley High... ...the New Directions!" I dropped to my knees crying.
We did it. "We did it!" Lizzie picked me up and spun me around and then Quinn engulfed me in the biggest hug. "You did it baby!" She cheered kissing all over my face.
~~~~~~~~~~
I stood near a familiar place with my leather jacket on my shoulders Talking to Kurt with Blaine on my right. "You totally nailed it." Kurt said with a smile.
I shrugged. "It was luck." I said.
"We'll see you at the wedding later right?" Blaine asked reaching out for Kurts hand.
"Yeah Ill be there." They walked away hand in hand as I looked down at my phone. I hadn't really touched it in a while.
"You look cute, but kill the leather. Were in high school, not a biker gang." I looked up and dropped my jaw at the sight. "A little familiar dont you think?" She asked with a smirk.
"You got your cheerios spot back?" She nodded and squealed. I picked her up in a hug and than I realized where we were, this is where I first met her. In my jacket and she had her Cheerios outfit on. I leaned down and captured her lips with mine. "My cheerleader." I said softly.
When she pulled away from my embrace my eyes traveling down, "Already trying to look up my skirt huh?" She asked.
"I like to admire whats mine." I said with a shrug.
~~~~~~~~~~
"Can I come in?" I asked softly.
"The doctors took me off 72-hour watch. I get to go home tomorrow." He said with a smile.
"That's great. I'm really happy that you're alive, David." I said sitting down in the chair next to his.
"Me, too." He whispered.
Seeing him in this bed made my heart ache and practically beat out of my chest. I fought the tears as I mumbled, "I should have ran faster."
He looked at me confused. "Why would you, after the way I've treated you and your friends?"
"It's okay." I said.
He shook his head, "No, it's not okay. It's like Kurt said on Valentine's Day, I made his life a living hell for months. Your his best friend. I affected you too. But when the same thing happened to me, I couldn't even take it for a week. I suppose a best friend telling me he never wants to talk to me again, my mom telling me that I have a disease... ...and maybe I can be cured... I don't know what to do. I can't go back to that school."
I grabbed onto his hand as I said, "Then go to another school. I'm not gonna lie to you, it... it isn't gonna be easy. And there'll be some days when... life just sucks. But you're gonna get through this. 'Cause I'm gonna help you. And so is everyone else who loves you and accepts you for who you are. And if they can't accept that, then... screw 'em. Right?"
He smiled and nodded, "Yeah."
I squeezed his hand and said, "This week, um, Mr. Shue had us think about something we're looking forward to in the future. You want to give it a go?"
"I don't know." He said uneasy.
I gave him an assuring smile saying, "Come on. I'll help you. Close your eyes, and imagine what life could be like in ten years. You're sitting in a fantastic office. You're some kind of successful professional. A lawyer, maybe."
He opened his eyes and said happily, "Could I be a sports agent?"
I nodded, "Sure... You're a big sports agent living in the city of your dreams because you left Lima and never looked back. Your handsome partner comes to visit you in your office and brings along your son. You're taking the rest of the day off work because you're taking your son to his first football game. You lean over to your partner, and you say, 'I'm so happy right now.'"
He smiled and took in a deep breath. "A-are we friends?"
I quickly nodded, "Yes. Yes we are." We smiled at each other. "You can trust me Dave. I know the feeling just as good as anyone."
~~~~~~~~~~
"Oh no. Blaine!" I yelled. He rushed to me. "What?" I pushed my phone to him. "Oh no."
~~~~~~~~~~
"I cant stop thinking about Lacy, I cant imagine the guilt she must hold everyday." I said looking down at my phone in the car.
"Me neither my love, but lets not think about that okay? We've had a long week." Quinn said as her phone buzzed again. "Oh my god will you tell Rachel we'll be there soon please."
I picked up Quinns phone and texted Rachel back. "I can't believe they're getting married."
"You are guilting me into this." Quinn said surely.
I nodded, "I know I am but he's my best friend and im not going without a date."
"Maybe we can sign marriage papers while we're there." Quinn said as we rolled down the road.
"You want to?" I asked.
Quinn shrugged, "Yolo."
"For real?" I asked.
"I love you, you love me. We know where we'll be in thirty years. If they're doing it why cant w-"
"TRUCK!!!"