Chapter 5
Wanted
Gray groaned when he woke up. He was on the verge of slamming his head on the wall. He lazily looked at his clock. It’s 8 am already. He is late for work.
“Fuck,” he groaned when he felt his throbbing head.
After Loki had helped him with his truck, he drowned himself in alcohol. Jim Beam, Bourbon, Jack Daniels, Tequila, everything he had on his house. He drank it all. He remembered he was like this when she left.
Fuck. He thought. I’m this reckless again.
He said to himself he’ll never be this wreck again. He was wrong. It was happening again. After seeing Juvia, he was this weak and wreck again. Gray got up with a throbbing head. He immediately went to his bathroom. He needs to shower and he is late for work. As he took a shower, he remembered her again. Starting from all the crazy things she did for him.
“Hi, Gray-sama!” She greeted. Everybody on the table turned silent. Gray eyes’ had widened.
What did she call Gray? Gray-sama? All of their friends looked quizzically both Juvia and Gray. And after a few moments, they all laughed. Except Gajeel, who face-palmed upon hearing his sister. Juvia blushed by the moment they laugh.
“Gray-sama?” Elfman repeated.
“Gray-sama ~” Loki said in a seductive tone then he laughed. “Fuck, dude. She likes you. Big time.”
That made Gray flushed – embarrassed even. He looked at Juvia whose cheeks are red. He glared at her. Why did she call me that? Juvia doesn’t look embarrassed. In fact, she’s smiling. Gray face-palmed, embarrassed of what’s happening. Juvia just blurted out in the whole guild, in the whole university that she likes Gray.
And it never ends there. He was always surprised. Letters in his locker. Gifts from her. Home-made chocolates, even pack up lunches! Juvia made it just for him. It never ends there. Juvia was following her whenever she sees Gray and whenever she had. She never loses hope. And him, he was ignoring him all along.
He slammed his fist on the wall. Frustrated that he remembered it again. All the rejection he told Juvia. Ignoring her and her love.
Stupid. He thought.
Then, he thought, maybe he deserves to be like this. All those rejections she had, he is paying for it now. He shut his eyes tightly. But I did love her back. He thought again. Shaking his thoughts, he went out of the bathroom to get ready for work. He dried himself and went to his dresser.
“Gray-sama,” He turned to Juvia. He was expecting it. Juvia is confessing her love for him. Again.
Gray turned around with irritation. “Juvia, stop calling me Gray-sama.” He rushed his hands through his hair. He saw Juvia blushed when he did that. He stiffened, having the same reaction Juvia had. She’s cute when blushing.
It was the same cold and snobbish expression he had when he turned to her, which she adores compassionately. It isn’t hard loving Gray. She thought.
“Gray-sama. I love you.” She said. Gray doesn’t change his expression. He looks at him, blankly. Inside, he doesn’t really know what to feel. He doesn’t know how to react. For him, it was wrong having this reaction from her. It is weird. “It isn’t just a simple crush. It is much deeper than you thought. It is much more than that. I thought I made my point, Gray-sama. I really love you so much.” She said bravely.
All the people in the campus are looking at her. Some intentionally stopped to watch them. Some, just glanced then walks away. Juvia doesn’t care if she was being watched by so many people. Juvia just cared about Gray giving her answers.
What the fuck? She really made a long speech this time.
Before Juvia had only made lunches, hearts, and chocolates from him. Now, it was a long speech of adoration.
Juvia was very expectant. More people are watching around them. He felt embarrassed. People are watching them. “So…can you have a date with me?” She asked.
She stood there, nervously, waiting for him to speak. He stood there, staring blankly at her. Irritation came through him. They were being watch. Later on, the gossips will reach every corner of the campus. Gray sighed and looked at Juvia.
“I’m sorry, Juvia.” He felt something when he said that to Juvia. Like, he wanted to take back what he had said. He saw her eyes watered. And it made him feel worse.
How can he reject this wonderful woman in front of him? How can he reject her?
People around them disappeared one by one. Some took sympathy on her. Some laughed at her for being desperate. Gray wanted to punch them. This is none of their business. They should go away.
“Okay.” She almost chokes her word. Gray heard her. It was the worst feeling he felt. “I’ll try my luck, next time.” She said and turned to walk.
How can he reject her? That is always been the question.
But Gray had a principle. For him, Juvia’s feeling would fade away easily. She might just be infatuated. Or she just likes the chase. The unrequited love. Gray never wanted to hurt her. He just felt like it was wrong to love her at this point of age. They were young and young love seems dangerous and forgetful. Young love is full of shits and promises. He never wanted that kind. But Juvia had always been around him, following him and adoring him all the time.
And that made him doubt his principles.
“Good morning, Mr. Fullbuster.” The receptionist greets her as he enters in suit in the company. He nodded and took the elevator. By the time he gets in his office, he was greeted by his secretary.
“Good morning, Mr. Fullbuster! Mr. Leo is in your office.” Said his secretary.
Gray sighed. Loki sometimes just barge in his office. “Alright, thank you. What are my appointments this morning?”
“You have a meeting with the advertising company you’ve invested at 2pm.” She said.
“Nothing else?” He asked.
“Nothing else sir.” She smiled.
“Alright, thank you. I’ll have coffee and advil please.” He said and he entered his office.
“Certainly, sir.”
Loke was sitting on the couch near his table when he entered. Loki was in his suit, cross-legged, and sipping his cup of coffee. He smirked when he saw Gray entered. Gray frowned.
“What do you want?” Gray snapped and turned to his swivel chair.
Loke laughed at him as if he was telling a joke. “Good morning to you, too, prick.”
Gray glared at him. “Why are you even here? You should be at your company. I think I’m supporting your company so well.” He said as he scanned some documents in his table.
He knows Loki is here to interrogate him. About last night and everything else. He doesn’t want to talk about it. But he knew Loki.
Loke laughed again. “Your employees at my company are working so well, Fullbuster. I’m here because I knew something.”
Gray managed to look at Loki. Loki just smirked at him like he knows a secret about Gray. His secretary entered the room. She brought the coffee and the advil he had been asking. Loki didn’t speak until his secretary disappears.
“I know it wasn’t a coincidence, Gray. You’ve been watching her.” Loki said.
“What are you talking about?” Gray asked, taking the medicine and drinking his coffee.
“Juvia…the advertising company where she works. It all connects.” He said. “You’re following her. I thought it was over, man.” He smirked.
He looked away and sipped his coffee. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Shut the fuck up, Gray. I know it.” Loke said. “What are you even planning, Fullbuster?”
He sighed and put down his cup. “I have no plans, Loke. Don’t put any meaning on that.”
“Everything about Juvia means a lot to you.” Loke said.
He shook his head, convincing himself Loke isn’t right.
“That company has just started nine months ago. And I know you had invested great amount in that company that it was now one of the top leading company in that industry. You had a part in it.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Go away! I have to work.” Gray said irritatedly.
Loki sighed and stood up. “Fine, you said that to me last night when you’re drinking your ass off.”
Gray stopped and looked at Loke. He didn’t expect that Loki would remember everything he said last night. He didn’t expect himself to be talking about that thing. Loki nodded at him.
“You said that.” He said. “Dude, whatever you’re planning, you should let it go. Juvia is a nice girl. And she’s our friend.”
He frowned. She didn’t consider me as a friend. You fucking know that. “I’m not planning anything against her. I’m not planning anything.”
“Really? Is that the reason why you invested in that company?” Loki said, sarcastically.
“The company is great. I’ve seen their performance. Even if Juvia wasn’t there, I would definitely invest in that company. Shut it, Loki.”
“Fine. I’m just worried about, Juvia. I’ve seen her last night. She cried.” Loki said as he accidentally saw Juvia crying on the parking lot last night.
Gray stiffened. He felt guilt then he shut his eyes. She cried because I said awful things about her.
“Dude, you should let it go.” Loki said.
“Let it go? Just like that, Loki? After she left me hanging? I should let it go just like that?” Gray snapped at him.
“So you’re planning on something. You should stop it, dude. Gajeel’s not gonna be happy about it. There are other girls around, Gray.”
“I’m not planning on something, Loki. You should stop thinking about it.” Gray brushed his hair in frustration. He even massages his throbbing temple. “Fuck off, Loki.”
“Fine. I’m stopping you because I don’t want her getting hurt anymore.” Loki said in gritted teeth.
Gray narrowed his eyes on him. “Since when do you care about Juvia?”
“She’s our friend, Gray.” Loki said. “She’s my friend.”
Loki stomped her feet out of his office. Gray stared at the door as Loki vanishes from his eyes. He massaged his temples again. He shut his eyes as he remembers it again.
I’m reckless again last night. I’ve even told that thing to Loki. Shit.
Gray is a risk taker. As an owner of an investing company, he needs to risk in order to get higher rewards. His risk in creating decisions had leaded him to his success, until now. Even when he was young, as a student, he always takes risk. In sports, in his subjects, he risks. But the only thing he isn’t risking is love.
He had always thought that love was never for him. He had a very hard time dealing with this. Himself losing his real family, he really had a very hard time trusting in love again. He was just a man, so he dated a lot of girls in college before even Juvia came into the picture. He is attractive like Loki but he never even tried getting involved with this love thing.
Not until Juvia came along.
He sighed and massaged his temples again. He groaned when he felt it throbbing again. He is sober but his head hurts not from his hang-over but from what Loki had said to him. He will do nothing harm in Juvia. But it is true that he had searched for her. After a year of search, he found her working in a small advertising company. And yes, it was true that he invested a great amount of money.
He was left behind. He really wonders why Juvia did that. Gray can’t let go. He hated that thought but it was a fact. He can never let go of Juvia. He can never let go of something he felt so sure and real. He had been wondering what was wrong. What did go wrong?
He rubbed his eyes, trying not to remember all that happened last night. He was wrong for thinking that he was alright seeing Juvia again. He had been following her in her work place. Just her workplace. That’s the only thing he knew right now. It surprised him when she showed up in that hospital. He thought he was okay with it. That he’ll get his closure with Juvia.
He thought that he might just want closure between them. He just wanted to know why she had run away. He wanted to know if she only liked the chase. If she was just that kind of a person, he’d hate her for sure.
But everything he thought was wrong after seeing Juvia last night, in the bar. He wanted something from Juvia. The reason all his creepy stalking he had made to search for Juvia means something. He knew it wasn’t for closure. He didn’t want closure from Juvia. He wanted more. He doesn’t get it what he really wanted from her. But the fact that he had found her again, made him wanting for her. Desperately.