The Initiate (A Divergent fanfic)

Chapter 29.

We walk back to dorm, my hands are covered in lead from the pencil. I carry my pieces of paper with me tightly that they are nearly screwed up. But my mind can only think of one thing; Dwayne is Divergent. But how can he be? How can he be anything other than Abnegation? And what is so dangerous about stage two? Is this what Tris warned me about? So many questions and nobody to answer them. I am helpless.

"So was that Dwayne guy your...boyfriend?" Connor asks. Despite my current situation I muster up a smile.

"No. He is or was should I say my neighbour I'm friends with his sister. Though if I stayed in Abnegation I would probably end up having to marry him." I say lowering my head at the group of Erudite that are scattered around the place. I don't want them to see me, I don't want to be haggled with the endless amount of questions.

"Oh. Why?" He asks. Is that a sigh of relief I hear?

"C'mon Connor you should know. We have serious social issues in Abnegation. We can't make friends easily so how are we ever going to find people to marry us?" I say in a high pitched tone of voice. Connor peaks his head over many others and then he grabs my arm and pulls me to the side without my resistance. I see the look of worry on his face underneath the dim blue light. "I know this isn't going to sound nice but you need to know. Earlier this morning I saw more Erudite here. They are taking more equipment like computers and...weapons." He whispers quickly that I have slowly re-track his words in my head. One word sticks out. Weapons. Why would Erudite need weapons? I thought their weapons were knowledge and lies. My heart rate begins to pick up. "You need to watch yourself ok." Connor says he moves away and follows the others. I just stand here dizzy.

"Erudite are planning something." I say to myself. Sick with worry. "And Connor wasn't giving me advice he was warning me." Maybe Connor know's who I am.

The next day we are all in the pit. The Transfers and the Dauntless born. We stare at one another taking in the differences we share, that's the thing about human nature we like to emphasize the differences we have. We bruised, they are hardly scratched, we are nervous, they are buzzing with excitement. Out of everyone here only ten will remain. Eric and Four walk down the empty space that is between the two lines. The No Man's land. I guess that reference is kind have fitting considering we are all at competition with one another. Eric scowers up and down for a moment he looks at me and grins. I'm his favourite student now, after I nearly beat someone to death. 

"As you may realize now The Transfers and the Dauntless born will be ranked together. Stage two is mental and you'll be taught how to remain calm even in your greatest fears. The first few times will be a practice and you will be using somebody else's fear landscape." Four says. I see a group of Dauntless born girls stare at Four in awe. I'm not surprised he does look like Evelyn. They are both handsome. We all then sit in white waiting room. A similar feeling I had when waiting for the aptitude test appears in my stomach. I pick at my nails as Uriah calls out names. 

We all sit in silence, with the occasion stare/glare from both sides. Aspin and Ryan are quietly whispering. They sit very close to each other. A few seemingly hours pass and the bodies slowly dissapeer. I saw Oliver stumble out of the room with sweat across his face. I watched Olivia collapse to the floor in tears and I helped her to her feet. Uriah steps out side of the room. 

"Ruby." He says looking at me, I take a deep breath and slowly stand. If what ever was in that room made people come out like that then I should be nervous. I walk over to the room and stop when Connor grabs my wrist pulling me into his gaze. "You have got this ok?" He says with an unsure smile. I smile back before entering the room. The room here is small, just enough room for a chair, a computer and a seat beside it. I am instantly taking back years to the aptitude test. The day I realised how dangerous I am. 

"Take a seat." Uriah says. I follow his command and sit on the black leather chair. I run my hand through my hair several times. My nerves are all on full display, everytime Uriah looks at me I feel as though he will tear through my lies and uncover my Divergence. And then I am screwed. He walks up to me and presses a pad onto my temple before typing onto the computer. "Alright for this we will see how you react in landscape with your fears. Of course we will practice you for the real thing, we will inject you with a serum and I will see your mind and how you stop the simulation. There are two ways either calming down and lowering your heart beat enough or fighting your way out. This is Christina's fear landscape. Any questions?" Uriah asks as he applies a tube with orange liquid to a gun looking object with a needle on the end of it. 

"You can see inside my mind?" I ask. Uriah nods his head, the white of his eyes look orange in the dim light. "Don't worry I won't tell anyone what might be in it." He adds. He stands next to me and I feel the cool metal needle on my neck. "You ready?" He asks. I say yes even though I think otherwise. He pulls the trigger and my vision blurs and waves. 

It clears and I find myself in a Candor home. The living room. Black sofas, white carpets, and white walls with the words 'Like a wild animal the truth is too powerful to remain caged.'  Painted on to them. Underneath the words the un-even scales are present. As I run a finger along the smooth marble walls I notice the walls break away and disintegrate. I look around frantically for an explanation, the walls fall away leaving me with an open field. Grass and the skeletons of the trees all around me. I feel a slight tickling on my legs and I look down to see black specs quickly climbing up my body taking control. I feel the same tickling on my back and shoulders and I begin to windmill my arms to get rid of the bugs. The more that fall off, the more of them climb onto me until the weight of the annoying topples me over. The bugs climb into my mouth and all over my eyes and into my ears. I roll around the grass trying to kill them. But they get too much and they suffocate me. My eyes begin to close and my heart sets into panic. I give up the fight and just lay there underneath the sky. And say the words that seem too obvious. "This isn't real." As soon as I finish I get a sense of awareness I have never had before and one by one I pinch the bugs off my body and see the white cracks form in the green grass. I pull out a chunk of the ground and like glass my surroundings shatter causing me to fall weightlessly. The falling stops and I open my eyes and I throw myself off the chair and violently shake like the sea.  

I repeatedly run my hand through my hair and hold my tears back. Uriah looks at me with shock and confusion. "Ruby how long do you think you was in there?" He asks me. Nice to see he is checking on my well fare. "Ermm I don't know about 30 minutes." I say back holding my knees to my chest. He shakes his head. "You were in there for 4 minutes which is three times faster than average. This is only a practice run but it appears to me that you are great at this, no need to worry huh?" He says with a smile. I nod my head and almost run out. My hands shake and sweat runs my face.

What on earth did I just experience?