All The More Reason ✔

Chapter 37 - Friendship

"Thanks, for reminding me Elio is just another person I care about that I lost."

"You didn't lose him." Avan pointed out, turning in his seat to face Senn. "You have a slight hic-up, but he actually seemed hurt over... you and Julian?"

Senn nodded to tell him his guess was correctly.

"So, he cares about you too. If he didn't, he wouldn't be so goddamn pissed."

"Yeah, but I'm also still unsure whether or not I should be pissed he outed me in his anger."

Lucas nudged him with a small smile. "Two plus sides to that. One, nobody I spoke to was negative about it. Two, he also outed himself, for you."

Senn rolled his eyes again, completely disagreeing with him in this. "Look, I know you want me to see some kind of bright side to all this, but there isn't. Coming out is my thing. My decision, not his. He didn't have the right to do that on my behalf. How people respond to it doesn't even matter, because it should still have been my decision to tell it to them in the first place."

"So, long story short, you are angry," Avan concluded, nodding along with him. "And I agree with Senn that this is something only Senn should've decided."

"I'm not... angry. I think." Senn dropped his head on the back of the couch, groaning. This was complicated to explain. Because part of him probably was angry because Elio reacted so dramatically to something that could so easily be explained. But anger wasn't what was controlling him—after all, he knew all too well what is was like to be consumed by anger—and this wasn't it.

He was also kind of curious. Curious as to why Elio made such a big deal out of this. Why had he been so angry that he felt the need to down shot after shot until Senn was in front of him? Why hadn't he walked up to him and Julian when he saw it happen. If he would've done that, he would've heard Senn explain things to Julian.

But what kept a hold of him most of all, was the feeling of being hurt.

"It's complicated. I don't like the fact he outed me, but I do understand he downed a shitload of shots, and he was seeing red because he saw me kissing Julian. He wasn't thinking straight."

"Obviously." Lucas muttered.

Senn snorted, shaking his head in disbelief. "I didn't know you could stoop to such a low level of obvious jokes."

"And we'll be here all day for your entertainment," Lucas said, bowing proudly.

Senn hit him, laughing along with Avan over his stupid humor, before he continued; "I'm not angry, just hurt. I get it, but that doesn't make it right. Besides, he never allowed me to explain the fact I pushed Julian away, told him about Elio and that I wanted to seriously try and be with him."

"Well, in that case, we'll make sure you two get a chance to talk this over," Avan told him with a small smile. "You want to explain what happened on your side, he deserves a chance to explain why he reacted the way he did. But none of this is a reason to give up, alright?"

And Senn knew Avan was right, but that didn't make it any easier.

* * * I'm so sorry for the long wait! Some of you might have read my announcements, most probably didn't; I've been having trouble with anxiety a lot lately (the whole Covid-restrictions are getting to my head). I've not been in the right state of mind to upload this chapter and face the reactions. But, today, I do, so here we are :D Hope you've enjoyed it! * * *

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Love, June