⚠️ spoiler ⚠️
"Satoru."
Gojo made no motion to reply, not even the slightest movement of his muscles, only admiring the city lights beneath him with his dull, blue eyes from the edge of the skyscraper. There was nothing else he could do but watch as the crowd of people on the streets crawled like little ants on the ground, he felt like a god watching over his creations and it irked him.
"The strongest shaman alive, huh.." he mumbled, bringing a hand to his eyes as he fought to keep his tears at bay. "To hell with that.. I couldn't even save my best friend.."
___'s brows furrowed in worry, wrapping her arms around Gojo's trembling form.
God, he had been so immersed in his own little world of being the greatest shaman that he had unknowingly left his friend behind, didn't even bother to check up on him when he needed it the most. As a result, Geto was dead, dead by his own hands and it hurts - it hurts, it hurts, it hurts to dirty his hands with someone else's blood. He couldn't take it anymore, the pain and the guilt. It was eating at his whole being, fuck, his entire soul was on fire and he wanted to scratch at it, claw at it and just scream at the top of his lungs how sorry he was, how he'd do anything just to take everything back; anything, and if it meant that he had to take a leap off of this skyscraper, he'd do it in a heartbeat, no questions asked.
"I was so selfish.. If only I'd tried harder to understand him, maybe I could've helped him with whatever he was going through." Gojo whispered, gritting his teeth. He pulled harshly on his white hair, salty tears rolling down his cheeks. He was truly torn, and Gojo had never felt this way before.
"Maybe I should just jump off and start a new life—"
"No.." ___ whimpered, pulling the boy closer to her body. "Stay.. for me."
Hearing her words snapped Gojo out of his saddened daze. He never really processed what he had just said, after all, his mind was still hazy, chest heaving as his stomach churned.
Apologetically, Gojo places his large hands on top of hers that were gripping on his uniform tightly, afraid that if she didn't hold him close, he'll fall apart. It was suffocating to say the least, but Gojo appreciated the gesture; he really needed it right now. He didn't even want to think about what could've happened if she wasn't there to hold him down and bring him back to reality.
"God, I must look so miserable right now.." Gojo stepped off the ledge of the building, twisting his body around to hug the girl back. He kissed the top of her head and played with her (colour) locks to soothe the intrusive thoughts running through his mind - it worked, but a certain thought clung to the back of his brain, refusing to let go. His hands travelled down to the small of her back, rubbing small circles with his thumbs, making the girl hum in satisfaction.
"You need to stay away from me."
___ jerks her head up at Gojo's words, her eyes wide as she looked in his own blue eyes to search for an answer.
"Why?" she choked out a strangled sob, her nails digging into his chest as she clutched at his uniform. She was puzzled as to why he would bring that up out of the blue, for what reason?
"Didn't we say that we'll stay by each other's side? That we'll be there for each other when we need it the most?" ___'s cheeks were now wet with tears, her nose flushed and sniffling as she looked at Gojo in disbelief, betrayal, sorrow.
Fuck, he couldn't stare at her eyes, no. Look away and go through with the plan. She can't stay with you, she'll only get hurt.
"It's for the best, ___." he replies weakly, averting his eyes to the city lights in the horizon. Gojo hears her scoff.
"For the best? You were about to jump off and kill yourself, Satoru!" ___ exclaims with a broken voice that made Gojo's heart sting. He lets go of her, taking a step back as his eyes shift to the ground in guilt.
"I can't lose you too.." Gojo whispers.
___ brings her hands close to her chest, attempting to even her shallow breathing. With a hiccup, the girl creates distance between the both of them hesitantly, trying to reach his eyes with her own, but he never brings his head up to look back at her.
"You're already losing me, Satoru." she whispers dejectedly. "You're pushing me away.."
Gojo stuffs his hands in his pockets and takes a deep breath, opening his mouth to repeat his words.
"It's for the best."
"___-sensei! Why don't you want to come with us?" Itadori asks, tugging the second-year teacher's sleeves as he stares at her with pleading eyes. From a distance, Gojo watches as his beloved student pleads the woman to come to the mission. ___ was one of the only people that knew about Itadori being alive, and Itadori was willing to beg on his knees just to have her teach him about cursed energy because apparently, Gojo had given him false hope.
"Didn't you say that it'd be easier to teach me during a mission?" Itadori added, pouting. ___ could only ruffle the boy's hair gently with a soft smile on her lips, shifting her weight on her chair.
"I'm afraid I can't come today." ___ spared a glance towards the blindfolded man leaning on the door frame of her private office, making Gojo's heart squeeze. She hadn't looked at him in so long and that one glance was all it took to bring so many memories back, overwhelming his mind with nostalgia. The way her nimble hands would run through his hair, the way her lips moved against his, the way her cheeks would flush when he'd give her a compliment - shit, he found himself yearning for her touch again.
"It's for the best."
Fuck.
Damn it, to hell with Itadori.
Gojo pushed past the startled boy, slamming his hands on ___'s desk, causing her paperwork to flutter towards the marbled floor. Despite that, ___ chose to ignore the man, continuing to ruffle Itadori's hair.
"___, don't ignore me." Gojo said sternly as he reached towards her to cup her chin. Before his fingers could reach her skin, ___ stood up from her seat and ushered Itadori out of the classroom, leaving Gojo with his outstretched hand.
"Are you so cold that you wouldn't even acknowledge me?" Gojo asked and ___ froze at the way his tone of voice lowered, agony lacing his words. Turning her head, ___ gave him a close-eyed smile, a forced one, he noticed.
"What are you talking about, Gojo?" she asks. "Shouldn't you guys get going?"
Itadori took notice of the way her grip on his shoulders tightened. Was there bad blood between the two?
Gojo gave the woman a look, staring at her for a moment before giving in. Sighing, Gojo took his hands away from the table and walked past ___, pulling his student along with him. Before he could turn the corner, he stops in his tracks and looks back at ___.
"Hey, let's get some coffee. For old times' sake." Gojo suggested. ___ only shot him a bittersweet smile, tilting her head charmingly as she racked her brain for an answer. She stared, longing to look at his blue eyes once more.
"Will it really be for the best this time?" she asks.
Gojo smiles.
"For the best."
