E
most of these were still by ah_its_the_duke on Instagram I'm sorry but like I said motivation go brrrrrrr
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Florida: My life isn't as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look
-
Florida: Is it easy? Not always. Is it worth it? YES!
DC: I don't care if it's worth it. You are not eating this entire pan of lasagna.
-
IDC: Why can't trees give off something useful like WiFi?
California: So just fuck oxygen I guess
-
DC: I'm straight. I'm a tough and isolated scientist. I'm a super intellectual and my IQ is so high that-
Florida: hi
DC: I'm useless and gay
Florida: so the feds is finally becoming self aware-
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PA: If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con'
PA: And the opposite of progress is congress
PA: Then the opposite of constitution is-
MA: let me stop you right there
-
Colorado and New Mexico: *arguing over something*
New Mexico: *goes to punch Colorado*
Colorado: *grabs Washington's glasses* YOU WOULDNT HIT A GUY WITH GLASSES WOULD YOU?!
New Mexico: *doesn't hesitate, grabs the glasses off Colorado's face and whacks him with them*
Colorado: you,,, hit a guy,,, with glasses,,,,,,
Washington: Well played.
-
California: So, what are you gonna be for Halloween?
Florida: I was thinking of dressing up as a sad virgin
California: Huh?
Florida: I'm gonna dress up as you
California: ...one-
Florida: okay, time to go- *runs off*
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Operator: 911, please hold
Michigan: Stop trying to stab me for a sec, we're on hold
Ohio: Okay
-
Florida: You call it a "near death experience", I call it a vibe check from god
Georgia: What did DC call it?
Florida: Irreparable cranial damage
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Florida: you guys think lava would taste spicy?
California: Oh my god please don't eat lava
Louisiana: Florida you do whatever you want
DC: actually since it's made of molten rock, it'd probably taste very bland and dusty
Florida: thank you so fucking much DC you understand me like no one else does
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Texas: Why did you guys get arrested?
Louisiana: We honestly don't know
Florida: Yeah, we did nothing wrong!
California: They got pulled over and when the officer said, "Paper," Florida said, "Scissors" and drove off.
-
(While at the zoo)
Massachusetts: What are they in for?
DC: This isn't a prison.
Hawaii: So they can leave then?
California: No, but-
PA, pointing to a penguin: I bet that one killed a guy
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DC: Ohio and Michigan have no survival skills. Their need to outdo the other one has replaced them.
Georgia: That can't be true.
DC: Watch this.
DC, yelling: Ohio! Michigan! Race eachother to the bottom of the stairs!
Ohio and Michigan: throw themselves out the window
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A/N
I noticed I had only four chapters and was like "well that's too little" so I decided to speed write this one lol-
Anyways I'm gonna go binge watch Unus Annus cause my dumbass has over 200 videos left to watch in 3 days.
Until next time, take it easy guys gals and non binary pals-
Peace out!
YOU ARE READING
Stuff about the states!
Fanfictionben for the love of god don't read this Okay, quick explanation- These are based off of the series Welcome To The Table/Welcome To The Statehouse, a series by Ben Brainard and the personified states of the U.S. These are going to be headcanons, ship...
