Monsters in the night

6

I'll put a warning here bc it could get a little intense maybe. And mentioning it here again, I'm taking a break. You are going to get this book finished sometime I just can't tell you when. I'm sorry. Stay safe out there, I love you all❤️

"Please, help me, Ant, please, I can't do that without you!"

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Dec had expected a lot of ways how Ant could respond. In fact, he had hesitated half an hour before even deciding to call because he had played every possible scenario in his head. The first and probably worst idea had been that Ant wouldn't even pick up. Simply let the call go to voicemail or, even worse, decline it. Then again, Dec had thought of Ant reacting snappy or angry, telling him that it was too late now. A part of his mind had even expected Ant to make fun of him. The one this he clearly hadn't expected was a dead silence for two seconds that stretched way too long for his liking, then a deep exhale and a relief-filled voice, saying: "Oh, thank goodness!"

Ant voice quivered with relief as he went on: "Oh god, Declan, finally." Dec was taken aback. No, that was an understatement. He was shocked. Thousands of questions exploded in his head, but all he could bring out was a small, whimpery "What do you mean?"

Ant seemed to slowly regain his composion and also his worry. "Declan, you've been acting weird for days!", he started to explain. Dec could almost see him pacing up and down in his apartment anxiously. Ant didn't give him any time to answer, but went on: "Everytime I met you you seemed more and more fragile, you avoided me, you looked like on the verge of complete breakdown! I was actually just waiting for you to crack, I was counting the seconds down to it. It bloody scared me, Dec! You were so vulnearble, yet you wouldn't let anybody help you - you can't believe how relieved I am that you finally manage it to ask me for help."

The words hit Dec like bricks in the stomach. Of course, Ant had seen it. Sure, Dec had never actually thought that his mascerade would completely fool his best friend. But that Ant had seen that deep behind his masks shocked him mildly. In addition, the guilt hit him with more force than ever now as he realized how he must have scared Ant and everyone around him as well.

"I'm so sorry", Dec croaked out, his voice still seemed to not work properly. He wanted to say more but was cut off immediately: "Don't even start. You at home?" Ant barely waited for Dec's verification. "Good. Stay. I'll hop into my car right now and come over. No, don't even start protesting. I'm there in twenty minutes, okay?"

Dec inhaled deeply, but somewhere in his chest he felt a small weight being lifted. Ant was on his way. He would not longer be alone in the upcreeping darkness. "Okay", he whispered into his phone. Then, quickly, before Ant hung up: "Bring you key... the door is locked." Then he hung up.

After the line had turned silent again, Dec slowly lowered the hand that was holding the phone into his lap and stared blankely at the wall opposite him. The house had been silent before the call but now the silence was almost threatening. It pressed down on him and made it hard to breathe. Dec closed his eyes and took a deep breath in. Not again. Not again and especially not now. He exhaled, inhaled again and tried to concentrate on only that. Inhaling. Exhaling. As long as he was able to control his breathing, he had control over at least a little bit.

Dec had no idea how long he was sitting there, just concentrating on breathing properly. Maybe it were the twenty minutes Ant had promised, maybe it was longer, maybe shorter. He didn't care. His whole mind was full of inhale - exhale - inhale - exhale. And it helped. The uneasy feeling in his chest stayed, he still felt like whenever he wasn't paying attention everything would crash around him. But he was able to hold the thoughts at bay. He didn't need to go much longer. Just until Ant was there. That was the thought that kept him in control.