Lady Outlaw

Chapter 16

Filey Manor, Filey, East Riding of Yorkshire

Roana was exhausted. The day had been long and fraught with so many conflicting emotions. She longed to sink into her bed and sleep, but she wasn't sure she would be able to. Admittedly, her worry for Allan had abated since the arrival of Alice and Burne earlier that day with news of his safety, albeit temporary, but it had only eased slightly. He was still languishing in a dungeon somewhere, rather than being by her side, where he belonged. Just the thought of it made her stomach churn with anxiety, and she knew that she was in for a restless night.
But there was still so much to organise before they set off for Scarborough the following morning. The outlaws were in the guest barn, fletching arrows and preparing for the journey. Robert had summoned the physician to check on Robin's back; Marian was adamant that he wasn't able to travel just yet, but Robin was equally as adamant that he would be leading the rescue. Marian had requested the physician to back up her claims, but personally, Roana knew that Robin would travel to Scarborough whether she liked it or not. Marian was returning to Nottingham the following day along with Eve and Averey, and she was worried for his wellbeing in her absence, ever though she was loath to admit it.  She and Robin were as stubborn as each other, but everybody could see the deep love they held for each other, even while they attempted to hide it behind bickering and good-natured ribbing. It would normally have melted Roana's heart, but it only highlighted the fact that her own love was so far away.
To keep herself busy, Roana decided to take a walk to the horse barn and check that their mounts were well-rested before the journey. The evening was still bright, the sun a gleaming orb in the sky as it began its descent on the horizon, and there was a balmy warmth in the air. As she crossed the courtyard, she heard her name being called and turned to see Auden approaching from the direction of the pig pens, where he had been filling the trough with leftovers from the kitchen.
He jogged the last few steps to catch up with her and smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners in a most attractive way. He was a good-looking man; Roana could appreciate that. She found him to be pleasant and attentive, and Robert sang his praises, which was all that mattered. She wondered idly if he had a family somewhere, a wife and children.
"Where are you off to?" he said as he fell into step beside her.
"I'm just going to the stables," Roana replied. "I need to check on the horses. We'll be setting off early tomorrow and I don't want anything to delay us."
Auden raised his eyebrows. "You'll be going with them?"
He sounded surprised, and Roana glanced at him. "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"
"Well, it could be dangerous. Wouldn't it be better if you waited here and let Robin take care of the dangerous part?" Auden seemed concerned, and Roana felt a pang of longing for Allan. She had grown so used to having someone care for her the way that he did, and she missed him. She felt tears threatening, and pretended she had an itch below her left eye in an attempt to hide it.
"I have to be there," she said, simply. "It's Allan."
Auden fell quiet as they entered the stable barn. Roana spoke briefly to the head stablehand, Mark, who was just finishing for the evening. He assured her that everything was ready for the morrow before he said goodnight, leaving Roana and Auden alone.
The horses were bedded down for the night and the only sound in the barn was the rustle of straw and the munching of hay. Thankfully, it was still light enough to see without a lamp, and Auden followed Roana as she made her way towards Pilgrim's stall. The bay mare whickered and moved to the half-door to greet her. Roana fed her the carrot she had stolen from the kitchen, breaking it into small pieces and watching the mare lip them from the palm of her hand.
"She's gorgeous. Is she yours?" Auden moved closer so he could run his hand down Pilgrim's neck.
"She is," Roana said with pride, watching as he petted the mare, stroking the velvety fur on her muzzle. "I helped hand raise her after her mother died."
"Looks like you've done a brilliant job." Auden turned his head to look at her, and Roana suddenly realised how close they were. She began to move away, but he took hold of her forearm, holding her in place.
"Roana, I've been wanting to speak to you alone," he began, earnestly, his brown eyes soft as they looked into hers. "I've grown close to your uncle in the time I've been here, and I know how much he wants the best for you. I'd really like to offer you that."
Roana gazed at him in astonishment, and he continued, quickly.
"I'll be taking over the family business once I've finished here, so I have much to offer a union between the two of us. I've also— well, I've developed feelings for you. I think we would be great together."
"What..." Roana was lost for words as she stared at him. Where had this come from? She had never imagined that Auden thought of her as anything other than a friend. The signs had passed her by completely. Yes, he was attentive, but she had assumed he was just being polite and courteous.
"Auden, I..." Before she could respond fully, he had hooked one hand around her waist and another around the back of her neck. He pulled her against his chest and kissed her, deeply and expertly.
Taken by surprised, Roana froze for a moment, and he took it for consent, backing her up against the wall of the stall and pressing himself against her. She immediately began to struggle and managed to get her hands between them, planting them on his chest and pushing him away.
"Auden, no!"
"Roana, I really like you. Just give me a chance." He moved in for another kiss, grabbing her face in his hands to prevent her from turning away and covering her mouth with his.
This time, Roana raised her leg and kicked him smartly on the shin. He drew back at once, clutching his leg.
"What was that for?" He looked at her, his brown eyes hurt.
She drew herself up. "I said no, Auden. I'm with Allan. I'm not looking for anyone else." He looked mortified, and she softened. "I'm sorry."
"Wait." He reached out a hand to her. "Roana. Think about it. Your uncle would readily accept a betrothal between us. I can offer you so much more than Allan can. You must be able to see that."
Roana stared at him, aghast. "Auden, I love Allan. I don't want anyone else. There's nothing more to it than that."
She left, then, hurrying out of the barn and back towards the house. Laney was lingering in the courtyard and Roana gave her a haughty glare as she swept past. The maid regarded her, impassively, then glanced towards the horse barn, where Auden was just emerging from the double doors. She made her way towards him, and Roana paused to watch them strike up a conversation before she ducked into the house, her mind racing.