13.he did it because of me

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Shin POV

I was going to Oikawa to go to university together. Oikawa had changed. He had changed a lot, and all of that change was Iwaizumi's fault, and I still feel that's terrible accident was his fault.
I was in front of Oikawa's house and rang the doorbell.

"The door is open as usual," I said to myself, and I opened the door and said, "Oikawa, I'm coming."

"Oikawa?"

The house was in disarray. All items were dumped on the floor.

"Oi ... kawa!?" Oikawa was not there.

I called his cell phone and his phone was at home. I entered the house and as I went forward, I saw scary things.
He had spilled glass on the floor. I entered with my shoes on. All the dishes and glasses were broken.
I raised my head and saw a scene that shocked me.

Iwaizumi POV

I couldn't sleep very well last night, I didn't sleep at 4 o'clock and I went for a walk.
My mind was involved.

That Oikawa really loves me?!

You haven't spoken to me since you saw me like that.

Tono thinks I played with her feelings. I loved her.

Oikawa has changed. It's not like his high school at all. Maybe it was an accident that broke his spirits. It has been almost a week and a few days since Oikawa and I did not talk.

I was in front of my house where an ambulance was. I didn't care and I lowered my head and went up. They took someone down on a stretcher, but I didn't see their faces.

"Oh my God," a woman was standing there.

"PLEASE GET OUT OF HERE. DO NOT CROWD HERE. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE." The police officer said.

I looked up. I entered that floor from the crowd. The door to Oikawa's house was open and the police were there. I entered the house.

"Sorry sir you can not enter," police said.

"What happened? This is my friend's house," I said.

"Sir!Can you come here? Do you know this man?" Police said and Shin came.

"No, I do not know him," said Shin.

"SHIN! WHAT HAPPENED?WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW ME? WHERE IS OIKAWA?" I screamed.

"WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING? IF OIKAWA WAS SO IMPORTANT TO YOU, WHY DIDN'T YOU TALK TO HIM FOR 2 WEEKS? WHY? WHY SHOULD ALL THIS HAPPEN? WHY SHOULD OIKAWA HAVE AN ACCIDENT? WHY SHOULD OIKAWA DO THIS TO HIMSELF? IT'S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU. "Shin said

I still don't know what happened.
What does the accident have to do with me? I ...

Why does Shin talk like this? Where is Oikawa? Was that person Oikawa?

"I don't want this talk to end in a fight. I think Oikawa wrote this for you," Shin said, handing me a piece of paper and walking down the stairs.

"WHAT HAPPENED? WHERE IS OIKAWA? SOMEONE ANSWER ME," I shouted.

"Do you know what happened to this house?" I told a lady.

"I know nothing, but the police said that the owner of the house had committed suicide," she said.

"W-what?" I was shocked and stayed on the same position for 2 minutes. I leaned against the wall outside the house and sat down.
I couldn't believe it at all. I just put my hand over my eyes.

I feel guilty. What should I tell to his mother? Oikawa please don't die.

"So the only thing you think about is how do you tell her mother?" I heard a voice in my head.

Agh come one...

I picked up the letter and opened it.

🏴🖤🏴

For someone I loved but he was my friend:

I always say to myself, I wish there was someone I loved and he loved me and the same thing was always repeated between us but all this was my imagination. After I woke up in real life...

The hardest thing in life is to see with your own eyes that the person you love loves someone else. In these last days of my life, I feel it was hard for me, but you were my life when I was your hobby.
And in the midst of those hardships, I realized how easily a heart breaks.💔
...
Dear Iwizumi! I could not speak. I wrote a letter to empty my heart so that even after that, there would be no pressure on me.
I must apologize to you for what happened that separated us, or if I may say better, for the mistake I made that caused a difference between you and Tono. I'm very sorry!

but I miss you like the sun misses the stars each morning.

It has nothing to do with you that I did this.
you know what? The reason I did this is nothing special, I just got a little tired of life and I want to sleep and not be in this world. I did not sleep well for a while and that was the best thing.

The last letter to the best person I have ever had.

I just want to call Iwa Chan one more time.

🏴🖤🏴

I read the letter and some tears dropped on the paper.

" sniff. oikawa ba..k-sob"

I was in the hallway. I covered my face with my hand and wiped my tears with my arm and got up.

I entered Oikawa's house. The house was very messy. Glass was everywhere in the house.
When I went ahead, the house was full of blood. I could not believe it. Was all this blood for Oikawa?

God! Say I'm dreaming.

Computer fell to the ground and I went and picked it up and turned it on and a movie opened.

I saw it from the beginning.
.
.

I started crying in the middle of the movie. I felt a heaviness in my chest.

Oikawa tried to kill himself for me.

"Why Oikawa? Why? Oikawa Why? Sob sob

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"Why Oikawa? Why? Oikawa Why? Sob sob. I're worth as much as your life? WHY DID YOU DO THAT? Sob. I SHOULD HAVE TREATED HIM BETTER. Sob sob sob. I WISH I HAD NOT YELLED AT HIM. sob. BAKA. YOU ARE RELIEVED AND IT IS THOSE AROUND YOU WHO ARE IN PAIN, GRIEVING, STRUGGLING. WHY DID YOU DO THAT?"

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