Alyssa
“Sorry! I can’t afford to wait for you!” Den.
She looked at me then show her weakest smile. She can’t fool me with her smile. She maybe smiling outside but when I looked into her eyes, I saw the pain she’s trying to hide behind that smile. Kaya before she turns her back, I grab her hand.
“Den, I’m really messed up and I always treat you like shit. I’m sorry because I know no matter what I do, I’m sure you'll be there. No matter how much I push you away, you’ll come back. And that’s not fair, you don’t deserve this shit treatment. I’m tired of being a shit."
Being scared is already an understament. This is it. I don't care what will happen next, what matters most is I'm taking the leap to give us a shot.
“Then do you think na by doing wrong in order to get something you want one day. Just to tell you, you might end up losing everything you want. Ask yourself if you wanted to get better or wanted to be stocked forever.” Nakatingin na sabi sa akin ni Den.
“I was convinced of telling this to Lau but I’m trying to find in my heart that I can no longer accept her offer. They gave me all the things para maging comfortable ang life ko from the condo, car, monthly allowance and full expense paid tuition fee since my freshman year. I’m now ready, Den.” I confidently said and smiled.
“Alyssa, alam ko yung mga sacrifices mo para lang marating dito sa kinalalagyan mo ngayon. I know you are doing all of these, whatever it takes to reach your dreams and do everything to avoid losing your status. Staying with Lau is easier than being with me. She has all the means for you to be successful. It’s easier to re-love Lau than learning to live with nothing? You need to consider your future first before us. I understand that you need to invest for your future.” Maluha-luhang sabi niya habang hawak-hawak niya ang kamay ko.
“I’m sorry pinipilit ko pa sarili ko sa’yo. Alam ko naman na from the start that we already have a problem. But andito na ako Den naayos ko na yung samin ni Lau. Can you forgive me and then let’s start with a clean slate?” Pagmamakaawa ko sa kanya.
Nilapit niya ang mukha niya sa akin and she kissed the tip of my nose. “I don't care how bad your past was. What matter is that you'll be a better person in the future. We live in the future, not in the past.”
