THESE DAYS, finn hudson

xii. mattress

When Magnolia reached the choir room, Gavin approached her immediately. She had been ignoring for a while, and she really didn't feel like talking to him now.

"Have you been getting my texts?" He asked her.

Magnolia panicked. "No! My phone bill was, uh, shut off?" She lied.

Gavin frowned. Magnolia had no clue why she thought she could lie to someone she's been friends with for a while, but she only sighed and stood beside Mike and Matt.

Kurt slammed some yearbooks on the piano. "Where's Rachel?" He asked.

"She's not here yet." Finn informs.

"Perfect." Kurt takes a deep breath. "Glee Club stands on a delicate precipice. We have all felt the cold humiliation of a slushie to the face. But as of right now, our relative anonymity as a club shields us from more severe persecution, swirlies. Patriotic wedgies." Kurt tells them.

"What's a patriotic wedgie?" Mercedes asked.

"It's when they hoist you up the flag pole by your undies." Finn tells her.

"Strangely, it did make me feel more American." Artie admits.

Kurt ignores Artie and continues. "Based on my investigation, I am of the opinion that a yearbook photo would only fuel the flames of anti-Glee-Club terror." He tells them. "I've done a little library research." Kurt begins showing them a yearbook. "Peter Gellar." He points at the picture. "Glee club second tenor, 1998. He can be seen here with both a drawn on Hitler mustache and rice paddy hat. Shortly after the yearbook came out, Mr. Gellar had a nervous breakdown. He is now the homeless man who sleeps in front of the public library." He reveals.

"Patches?" Quinn asked.

"Patches." Kurt answered.

"He barks at my mom." Brittany tells them.

They all look at each other in shook as Kurt continued. "Exhibit B." He points at another person in the yearbook. "Tawny Peterson. Glee Club class of 2000. Seen here in her photo with a cartoon knife stuck in her head, in a macabre tableau that, in four years, would prove eerily prescient." He tells them. "I think I speak for all of us when I say that not having to pose for a yearbook photo might be a blessing in disguise." They all seemed to agree. "I suggest not fighting Figgin's ruling."

Mr. Schue walks into the choir room and they quickly close the yearbooks. "Oh, hey, guys." He greeted. "Ah. Looking at old Thunderclaps?" He asks approaching them all.

"It's really unsettling." Artie admits to him.

Mr. Schue points at him in agreement. "And totally unfair." He adds. "Hey, can I borrow one of these?"He asks Kurt. But, he took one anyway before Kurt could answer. "You know what? This year's Thunderclap is going to have a Glee Club photo with every one of your smiling faces. You have my word on it." He promised, leaving the choir room.

They all looked upset at the thought of their pictures being defaced by everyone else in the school.

• • •

"Are you avoiding me?" Gavin asked, walking up to Magnolia's locker.

She shut her locker at lighting speed and gave him a smile. "No!" She lied, she felt terrible for leading him on. She felt like she was the worst person on the face of the Earth. How could she do this to her best friend? "Why would you think that?" She asked.

Gavin let out an awkward laugh. "I don't know, feels like it." Magnolia shrugged and decided to walk with him. "Look, Maggie if you are upset about me telling people about our kiss just know that it was Kurt who told Mercedes who told-"