But She's Darkskin: I Believe || Book 2 || Editing Soon

Chapter 11

Ashton was laid across the bed when I walked inside and I sat down on the edge of it. I grabbed the game out his hand and tossed it on the floor. His eyes widened a little and he went to grab it but I grabbed him. "Listen to me Ashton , Athea is your little sister. I don't know why you're treating her the way you did yesterday , but it has to stop. You can't treat her that way."

"Why did you have a baby by someone else besides mommy!? How am I suppose to accept her when we have different moms!?" He yelled my way. I'm not going to lie to him , I refuse too.

"Your mother and I were arguing a lot after you went to the hospital. You were having a bad asthma attack and then after that I left to go visit my dad. When I was down there I went to the club and got drunk with my friends. That's all I remember because the next morning I was in the bed with Athea's mom. I never told your mother about the baby , she found out though ... That's why I left. When you guys left my heart couldn't take it. I wanted to be gone." The tears ran down both our faces. He looked as if he wanted to say something but couldn't.

"You hurt her daddy.. you hurt me." He whispered lowly. "I sat here all day everyday not talking to anybody. I missed you , I thought you were gone."

"I'm sorry Ash, I know me saying sorry isn't going to make up for lost time. I just want you to forgive me and know I made a mistake."

"You did and I don't want Athea around me. She's just a mistake." He mumbled and I gripped him up by his shirt pulling him closely to me.

"I'm going to tell you this right now. Being with her mother was a mistake but having her was not, I don't regret having my daughter. I do regret hurting you and your mother the way I did, but whats done is done and you're not going to call your sister a mistake."

"You can not get mad at me "dad" you're the one who fucked up ! Not me !" He screamed in my face. I was utterly shocked by what he just said to me and Ashley must've heard him so she ran into the room. "I blame you for all the lost days. You knew how much you meant to me and before you left me you were with Athea anyways.. Didn't even come to my grduation." The tears ran down his face.

"You don't love me, you just claim you do because if you had the chance you'd leave us all again. You'd leave me to be miserable and leave mommy to be all sad again. I don't know why I even wanted you back because all you're going to do is the same shit you did before. I don't want to cry anymore and I don't want to be locked away from the world! But when my parent I looked up too don't know if he wants to be in your life for real, that's how you feel." He finished off yanking himself out my arms and running out the room.

I leaned my back against the wall thinking about everything my seven year old son just told me. He was right, I'm a failure and I did nothing but let them down. I fucked up their lives and for some reason they keep letting me back in. I didn't mean to hurt them the way I did, especially Ashton. He was my first and he cherrished me. Me being selfish I just left and that was wrong.

-

"See now he snapped on you, didn't you expect that Kingston? It's no need to feel shocked because it was going to happen eventually." My dad explained to me over the phone while I packed my stuff up for this little two day trip Ashley and I were taking. She doesn't know we're going to be in a hotel for two days but she'll be alright. She needs a break from the kids, she deserves one.

"I'm not shocked that he did it, I'm shocked that he did it at such a young age. I feel bad because he's so young and he had so much shit built up inside of him because of.."

"Yeah because of you, you are the reason my grandson is distraught and so bottled up. I know you thought you were protecting them from whatever you were running from but Kingston you were running away from feelings. I know you. You didn't know if you wanted to be with Ashley or Keyonna. Or you didn't know if it would be right to take care of all of your kids and still make the mothers happy. What was Keyonna and what would she have stayed if she didn't get pregnant?"

"A one night stand." I dropped onto the bed.

"Exactly, someone you would have never seen again. You regretted it and you were crying saying that you didnt mean too. When you found out she was pregnant that crushed you more and you hardly came to my house. Now once you realized that Keyonna was attractive and you found out she was pregnant that made you have to be around her more."

"And that's when everything went downhill." He mhmed me and I closed the top of my suitcase. Everything he was saying was more than right.... in a way. "I just want them to know I'm not leaving this time."

"You have to prove that, they're not going to believe it if you're just going to say it. Especially not Ashton, he's heard you talk so many times he wants to see it to believe it. Your child cursed at you, he had to be really mad."

"You right.. Thanks pops."

"Anytime."