What are the chances?

Crush

Kat sniffed as she wiped her face with the sleeve of her hoodie.

"To solve it we need to unpick it and look at each part as separate pieces and not as a whole entity." Debbie continued as she climbed out of the bed and headed over to the en-suite.

Kat tiredly sighed as she picked at the fraying sleeves of her hoodie. Her eyes shut tightly as her chest tightened again as it tried to put the lid back on the bubbling pot of emotions inside her

"First of all, tell me what happened last night, I feel that this has something to do with where you are currently at." Debbie emerged from the en-suite with a box of tissues and threw them on the bed as she got back into her spot.

Kat began to walk Debbie through each step of the last night, and explained everything in detail from the tea and biscuits, to what they talked about, the kissing, him asking her to stay, and her bolting out of there as quickly as she could, then finally the dinner date. Kat rubbed at her eyes as Debbie smiled endearingly.

"Oh, Kitty Kat. So the very first thing I'm going to say to you is that throughout the whole of that all you did was smile." Debbie raised her eyebrows. "Kat, you are clearly into this guy, if he's making you happy then just let him."

"Yeah but..." Kat paused.

"But what?" Debbie quickly jumped in.

"There is, too many feelings, it's freaking me out. Like when he kissed me, my whole body was literally on fire. I can't explain it... it hurt... not hurt... ached... yeah. It ached where he touched. I have never, ever, felt that intensity before, and it's just too much. I met him 3 days ago Debbie. 3 days."

Debbie nodded as she listened intently.

"Who... who feels like that over someone they have literally just met?" Kat got up and paced over to the window as her animated arms flapped around in emphasis.

Debbie couldn't help but smile again as she watched Kat getting flustered in her thoughts. "Breathe Kat, Breathe. Look, it's absolutely ok to feel what you're feeling. There is nothing wrong at all with those feelings, and if I'm honest, I'm a little jealous. Some people will go through their whole life never ever feeling that, so embrace it and fucking enjoy it. It's literally been years since you felt anything for someone, and whatever it is about this guy that has finally unlocked that for you is great. Actually, he needs a fucking medal or something, but it means you are ready to move on with life and now you've felt something, you can be open to having feelings with people. Jesus Christ Kat the only thing Mark ever makes ache for me is my head when he keeps leaving his pants next to the washing basket."

Kat let out a relieved little giggle.

"Yeah but, you and Mark are in love and that's a very special place to be for all those years." Kat looked back out at the misty morning and wrapped her arms around herself as her relieved giggle disintegrated back into uncertainty and sadness. "I'm getting a quick fumble and then it's all over in 4 days time. Then I'm back to an empty house and my marking."

Debbie's head bobbed up and down. "And I think Kat, that right there is EXACTLY what your problem is."

Kat screwed her face up in confusion as she spun around to look at Debbie.

"You're more focused on the end than you are on the moment and just enjoying it." Debbie grinned liked she had just cracked a case. "You're trying to guard a heart that wants to love Kat, and that's why you're in conflict with yourself. Jesus Christ, I'm good." Debbie proudly declared as she smugly leant back on her pillows.

"So how do I just 'enjoy it' without having that feeling constantly hanging there that it's going to end soon?" Kat inquisitively tiptoed back over to the bed and climbed in next to Debbie.