The Marionette • Chuuya X Reader

40: Winter Wine

Akutagawa stands in the middle of your room, a troubled look on his face as he keeps his eyes on you.

Of course, he knows what it is to question ones worth for the sake of a person.

"Wallowing in your own self pity will do nothing for you. Hasn't anyone told you that already? When are you going to start being enough?"

Staring at Akutagawa with a frown, you then look away from the judgemental mercury in his eyes, face turning hot when you process his words as a scolding though there is no malicious intent, as if he's there for you. Lightly biting your lip briefly, you sigh and look back at him, confused now as to why he had set aside your phone and pulled his out now, dialling a number without taking his eyes off you. You hear the ringing, your heart beating faster as he shows you the number he's called, your breath taken away when there's an answer, body freezing in place as all the colour drains from your face and your heart breaks a little more.

"Yes?"

Chuuya.

He answered Akutagawa.

"Chuuya..." you whisper, barely reaching out to the phone when Akutagawa hangs up, placing the phone back in his pocket with a glimmer of sympathy in his irises.

"Look how stupid you're acting. Aren't you embarrassed to call yourself Port Mafia? Executive Nakahara will be busy for a week. If he is not taking your calls then why call him. Plus, his flight should be leaving soon. Focus on fixing your own foolish attitude." He snaps at you, the sympathy unmatched by his harsh tone and annoyed expression, pale face dimly lit by the lights in your room, shadows hiding other unnameable emotions that you usually can't see on him.

"Akutagawa...you're contradicting yourself..." You begin, taking a small step forward to him, voice slightly caught up in your throat.

"What?"

"You said you don't care. That we aren't as similar as I say. But...isn't this-"

"Would you prefer I kill you to end your misery?"

Looking him up and down, you try to read his sudden defensive reaction to your words, pulling yourself out of your mental tragedy to give Akutagawa a soft smile, finally putting it together.

"We're both hopeless." You respond, walking a little closer, shaking off the nerves over his intimidation and stopping less than a metre in front of him, head tilted to directly meet his gaze.

Neither of us know how to care.

"What are you doing?" Akutagawa asks with suspicion, backing away a bit, eyes narrowing.

Perhaps I should have been more understanding with you too.

Dazai ruined the both of us after all.

Mentally flipping a coin and taking a leap of faith, you suddenly pull Akutagawa to you into an embrace, burying your face into his shoulder and wrapping your arms around his thin body before you tense up, only relaxing after a few seconds when he hasn't yelled at you or pushed you off, Rashomon not even activated. Though Akutagawa doesn't exactly hug you back, you move your head to the side a bit to take a peak at his expression before looking away again; his eyes wide, mouth pressed together as if unable to decide how to react, a blush barely noticeable on his porcelain skin tinting his cheeks. You know he's embarrassed, and you know everything in his body is screaming against any form of touch from you of all people, but for some reason he relaxes slightly when you look away, his next words soft but full of unresolved feelings.

"I hate you, Marionette."

No, you don't.

But it's ok, I won't take that as an insult anymore.