Misfortune [manxman]

Chapter 35

Chapter 35

I woke up to a pair of strong arms wrapped around my midsection and Collin's head resting against my lower back, still asleep judging by him snoring ever so lightly. I shimmied and squirmed until I was able to turn around in his bear hug and press my lips against the top of his head, smiling into the kiss and just enjoying beginning my day with him. I very much loved this and I wrapped my arms around him to stop him from letting go off me. I just wanted to be held by him and have some positive experiences with him after yesterday's disaster.

My heart was still hurting and I wanted to heal it with some nice memories. Then there would be less pain and more happiness. I sighed hopefully, closing my eyes again to get some more rest because my night hadn't allowed me to get much. My sleep had been plagued by horrible nightmares of him leaving me today and I felt somewhat reassured feeling him cling to me like this. At least subconsciously he still wanted to stay close to me and not get rid of me.

Right?

After a few more minutes of being half asleep, half awake, I carefully freed myself from the bear hug I was currently trapped in, gently pushing Collin off me who grunted, only to curl up on himself. I slipped out from under the deliciously warm covers before I pulled the blanket back up to cover Collin and I quietly walked over to the wardrobe to get a pair of black pajamas as well as one of the tank tops Collin had gifted me. I needed to be able to think clearly about all of this without Collin's presence poisoning my mind. 

I went to leave but I hesitated for a moment and turned back around to give Collin a gentle kiss on his cheek one more time before I left the room. I was going to horribly miss him and I wanted him to know that I was going to come back as soon as I had made sense of all the chaos inside of my head. Even though it may be stupid since he was asleep, I didn't want him to think that I was going to abandon him. I was always going to be there for him, love him and be right by his side. 

Forever, hopefully.

I didn't want to wake him up by stepping on that one creaking step in the middle of the stairs, so I used my wings to glide down and land in our living room with a soft whisper. My heart felt heavy already and I sighed upset, missing him instantly and I had to force myself to leave him behind instead of crawling back underneath the covers to snuggle up to him. The only thing which comforted me was the thought that we could have fun together later and that I was going to see Collin try to be better.

He promised.

The air outside was still way too cool for me and my thin clothes, so I grabbed one of the blankets from the couch, wrapping it around my shoulders with a yawn. I spent a bit of time fully waking up and expelling the sleepiness from my body while I stood on top of our patio, watching a magpie run through our backyard while making angry noises at me. I growled under my breath, too tired to start chasing after it and the spikes on my back were standing straight but I swore to myself that one day I was going to catch it.

I walked down to the lake behind our house after I had woken up completely, sitting down at the edge of the water, knees drawn to my chest. A few birds were singing their morning song, a deer was staggering past in the distance and there was a big toad croaking at me displeased before crawling into the shrubs. Beyond the mirror-like surface of the lake was an endless sea of dark woods that extended beyond the horizon. The sun was barely rising, a few rays creeping over the horizon and everything felt so peaceful.

Being all by myself felt really good and it allowed me to concentrate purely on myself for once. Usually my entire mind was concentrated on Collin, how to make him happy and how to make him not hate me but right now, I could just be me. I didn't have to take him into account at all and I could think about things which made me happy and what I wanted to do. I hated having thoughts like that because I loved Collin very much and I didn't want him to think I didn't appreciate him but it was true.