Live & Learn (ONC 2020)

Brain Freeze

It was silent.

Leo slowly tore his gaze away from the ground, and peeked at Luna. She was looking at her hands, and not saying a word. The tray with bread lay in between them, long forgotten.

Leo blinked away the moisture that had appeared in his eyes. After all this time, it still got to him. He thought he had moved past it, but really telling the whole story, reliving the whole story, was harder not to be affected by than when he just forgot about it and moved on. He hated that. Feeling so negative was just not like him, and this made him feel very negative indeed. Though he was right to feel affected by it, as it truly had been a horrible evening, and one that still got him in trouble now.

Leo quickly rubbed his eyes, pretending he was just wiping out some dirt. Not that the pretending was necessary. Luna still hadn't looked up. Was she mad? Scared, because she was locked up with a once upon a time maniac? Maybe he shouldn't care what she thought of him now. He had only met her this day and they would part ways soon. Whether that would be them escaping or him saying goodbye before he left this world he didn't know, and he prayed it was not the latter. Still, the idea of someone rejecting him because of that certain night was not a nice one. It hurt at least a little bit.

Leo shifted uncomfortably. He couldn't see her expression, because her hair covered most of her face. Whether that was deliberate, he didn't know.

Finally, he decided the silence had lasted long enough, and he opened his mouth to speak.

"I understand if hearing this makes you feel...uncomfortable about me."

After all, why shouldn't she? What exactly had happened at the Dirboue estate was a mystery to him, but it was pretty obvious he had hurt people, probably killed people. Warlocks could survive many things, but if they were badly hurt it could lead to unconsciousness, and with the whole garden on fire... fire was an effective way to kill a warlock. If Leo had learned one thing about humans so far, it was that they did not appreciate it when someone had blood on their hands, with an exception of the humans who had gone on a killing spree themselves.

"What?"

Leo kept looking at his lap at hearing the soft voice. He started fumbling with his hands. He could add one more thing to the list of feelings he hated. Being scared of what people thought of you was a stupid thing. Why did Luna have to make him explain to her why she might feel uncomfortable? Was that not obvious?

"Well, I killed people. And god knows, or rather the people that were there know, what else I did. Overall, things like what I did are considered pretty bad, some might even say horrific. Maybe once we get out of here you should take me in, since you're from the Paranormal Council." He flashed a sad little smile at his messed up joke. Though it was indeed a joke, he wasn't that disgusted by himself.

"Leo."

At hearing his name Leo looked up. Luna had finally stopped staring at her lap too. Her eyes were wet, and her lip was slightly trembling. God! He had made her cry. Was she truly scared of him? Abhorred? Did she think what he did was horrific?

Even thinking that she thought that of him, that anyone would think that of him, was painful. He wasn't a dreadful intestine ripping cruel living being driven by hatred at all! Most of the time anyway. Leo leaned forward and reached for Luna's hand.
"Mon dieu. Luna, I swear, I would never do such a thing again. I wouldn't even know how to. I am horrible at magic. The blasted thing just won't do what I tell it to. You have seen me, I accidentally transformed myself into a statue! I needed someone else to get me out. Believe me when I say that in the over one hundred years since...it, I have never been able to do anything like that again. Or as uncontrolled. There really is no reason for you to be--"