Ever since Tasha told me her nightmare if experience I couldn't look her in the eyes. I'm not sure if it's quilt , shame or anger towards myself for judging her without knowing anything. But it's something along those feelings. I don't deserve her, I don't deserve any good. I don't deserve anything.
And I certainly don't deserve this baby.
And him Leon. I haven't told him yet.
He is the only boy I liked my whole life. He is everything a girl could ever wish for and more. And he is the most beautiful guy I had ever seen. I don't wanna loose him. Not like this. Not what n I jus got him.
Jus when I'm starting to get my life together.
I'm still in college barely half way.I am already finding it a handful taking care of myself by myself. What am I gonna do with a baby? How am I gonna take if a baby by myself.
A living thing. Not Snoffy or plants I got from the old lady. No! A whole child. That cries and poops. Thinking about it alone gives me anxiety.
On another note.I'm already a terrible friend. What kind of mother would I be?
A horrible one.
The voice in my head beat me to it before I could answer.
And it's right.
How did I even fall pregnant I went from being a virgin to pregnant like a joke. Not a conversation I'm ready to have with myself or anyone for that matter.
I can't do this.
At times like this I wish my sister was still here.
But I can't dwell too much on it. Coz exactly many times did I wish for her to be here but she ain't.
She left me coz I was jus a burden to her. A nuisance jus like I was to everyone else before Tasha ame along. Before people only loved me when it was beneficial but left me when I needed them most.
YOU ARE READING
everything you seek is within
Short StoryAlisha thought she was happy and lacked nothing until she lost everything. That is when she realised she had nothing and she was nothing at all but merely a shadow of those around her. To the bitter realisation of this she vowed to find herself by h...
