Once In Katipunan

Chapter 15

Nagsimula na rin kase ang second semester namin, kaya kinailangan naming magpasa ng requirements para sa practice teaching namin kahapon.

From Luv:
Of course babe, I'll not take this exam if you will not come here. You better hurry or I'll not become a CPA.

Napangiti ako sa kashungahan ng reply niya. I know he's a bit upset that I wasn't able to finish my tasks earlier yesterday, and he's sad because he was left in his hotel room alone, kaya inagahan ko na lang ang pagpunta sa USTe ngayong araw.

"Para kang timang diyan. Ngingiti ngiti ka mag-isa. Ang corny niyong magjowa, pota kayo!" Bitter na puna ni Arni.

"At least masaya, eh ikaw? May jowa ka nga hindi ka naman kayang pasayahin, pinagpapalit ka pa." Ganting usal ko.

Sinamaan niya ako ng tingin dahil sa sinabi.

"Friend baka nakakalimutan mong ako ang may hawak ng manibela, gusto mong idiretso kita sa punerarya pisti ka!?" Aniya na ikinatawa ko.

I used to tease him with those remarks, but I really don't have any idea about her love life's score. I don't want to meddle with her affiliates, because I'm afraid that I might cross my boundaries. As much as I want to ask her about her relationship status, gusto ko pa rin na manggaling mismo sa kaniya 'yung gusto kong marinig dahil 'yun ang tama. Ayokong manghimasok sa isang teritoryong alam kong hindi ko naman maiintindihan. Besides, I can see that she's happy most of the time, maybe there were times that I see her problematic, but those were as seldom as a blue moon. Siguro ang maipapangako ko lang sa kaniya ay yung suporta ko sa kaniya anuman ang mangyari.

"Friend, balita ko palaging magkasama si France saka 'yung ex niyang greek ah." Arni opened another topic.

"Si Shann Athena?" She nodded as a response. "Oh, anong meron do'n?" Taka kong tanong.

"Okay lang sa'yo 'yon? I mean, 'di ba nanggaling na rin sa'yo na feeling mo may nararamdaman pa rin yung greek na 'yun kay France? 'Di ba awkward 'yun?" She asked.

"Hindi naman. May tiwala naman ako kay France. Kung may gusto man 'yung ex niya sa kaniya, then so be it. Mahirap naman kasing pigilan ang isang tao na magmahal, kaya wala akong magagawa roon. Ang importante naman ay alam kong sa akin pa rin uuwi si France, dahil alam kong ako ang mahal niya. Wala naman akong dapat ipangamba, dahil alam kong wala namang papatol sa pagkaggusto nung si Shann Athena." I answered confidently.

Maturity should always be compelled in a relationship, may it be in small or big things.  Part of being mature is the development of trust between each other. Jealousy might be inevitable most of the time, but the things that we do when we feel jealous must be minimized. Kailangan maging matibay ang tiwala mo sa karelasyon mo, dahil 'yun ang simula ng isang matibay na pagsasama. Stop romanticizing the idea of jealousy as an implication of love, because it isn't. Love is about faith, trust and the deepness of your belief on your partner's faithfulness. Of course it's normal to feel jealous, but we should never stoop down our level and do ridiculous things just to feed our ego. It is important to always try to widen the array of our understanding and always think of the bigger things.

I'm actually thankful that France doesn't fail to reassure me. He knows I'm always anxious and I tend to overthink things so he always make sure that I have nothing to worry about. He doesn't do anything that might get me jealous; and is there's something he overlooked, he always take time to explain everything and clear my mind.

"Saka, duh, Amber Rayne Tantenco na ang nasa kaniya, babalik pa ba siya sa pinaglumaan na? Tingnan natin kung sinong lugi." Biro ko na ikinabungisngis niya. "Eh ikaw ba? Musta na?" I tried to divert the topic to her.

"Luh, siz 'wag mo akong tanungin ng ganiyan. Baka hindi tayo matapos sa kwentuhan." She tried to make it sound humorous, but there's something more than glee. Pain. Loneliness.