Discarded

chapter 33

Jordyn

I slowly woke up the scent of pizza filling my nostrils. I got up walking towards the kitchen where I saw Ariana, face in her hands in front of a pizza.

„Good morning" I mumbled sitting opposite of her taking a piece of pizza.
„Morning" she replied simply.

There it was. Silence.

When we were about to do the dishes, she finally spoke.

„You-You told me we need to talk about—last night" she stuttered our making me furrow my eyebrows.
„Yeah. Why did you even drink? I told you so many times ‚don't drink too much' or some other stuff." I explained and she just nodded in.
„I'm sorry I just—lost control. We really went for dinner first but afterwards she told me to go into the club for just one—drink"

„Just one drink Ariana? I waited here for you the whole time and you didn't show up. You didn't even leave a message. You couldn't take off or I don't know at least tell Courtney to text me." I hissed.
„I'm s-" she tried to say but I interrupted.

„What would you do? Imagine I would go into a club for ‚one drink'. You would kill me because you would be so worried." I again tried to explain.
„I know baby but please I'm really sorry I'm never gonna make that again. I promise."

I looked at her different than the other times. Of course I mean what did she expect? That I would open the door with a flower bouquet and tell her ‚oh my god please go out another time that long and please don't text me. Suddenly an awful thought came in my mind.

„Ariana did you cheated on me?" I questioned out blue. She got red not even looking at me.

Her gaze became more and more nervous like she didn't know what to do.

„Ariana—did you?" I asked another time just hoping for a good answer. As I looked at her I just saw her nodding.

„Y-You cheated on me?" She nodded.
„H-How?"
„When I—When I didn't answer your calls—"

„Wait—what did you do? With wh-whom?" I questioned trying to control my tears.
„It was a girl—I don't know her name—we—kissed and—and we—" she stuttered feeling tears leaving my eye.

„You fucked with another girl?"
„Jordyn I swear it didn't mean nothing to me—it was because of the alcohol—I swear I lo-"
„Don't say that" I cut her off.

„Never tell me this again—never okay?" I hissed before walking into the bathroom locking it.

I slid down the walls feeling my tears storming out my eyes. I felt betrayed, painful, useless.

„Jordyn please open the door let's talk about it I beg you. I love you!" she yelled but I just kept on crying.

I needed this. I didn't want to break down in front of her but I need this to be strong outside with her.

I didn't want this way of relationship. I want a girl who is loyal and who never ever think about cheating on me. I could never imagine cheating on Ariana.

Of course not, she is—actually no. She was perfect. For me. But she would be it for someone other because I didn't want this anymore. I couldn't take this and I couldn't forgive her.

I wiped the tears out of my face before opening the door. Ariana was walking forth and back hands on her head.

„Jordyn" she said as she spotted me.
„Please let's talk" she suggested and I nodded.

We took a seat and looked at each other. As much as I still loved her besides the hate. I knew I had to end this. It's not healthy neither of us.

„Jordyn please you have to listen to me" she uttered and I looked at her pissed.
„I'm listening Ariana. Talk to me."

„Yeah I cheated on you. I was drunk and I know it's not an excuse but you have to believe me. There weren't any of feelings for this girl Jordyn. I love you and I wanna marry you. I know it's gonna be hard for you to trust me again—but I don't wanna give up on you Jordyn I love you so much—" she spoke making me cry.

I just looked at her without saying a word. The only thing I felt was pain. I trusted her so much. I thought I could give her everything I had and she would be happy.

„Don't stay silent—scream, yell I don't know but just don't stay silent" she begged. I didn't know what to do. But then I knew I had to stay strong for myself. I needed to be the strong woman everyone knew.

„What should I say Ariana? I put all my trust into you. I let you do everything with me. I can't spend my future with a woman I can't trust. I'm sorry but neither I can forgive you that. I'm sorry but I can't do this. It's better for each other to go their own way." I explained feeling hundred of stitches in my heart.

„Jordyn please don't" she mumbled between her sobs which became louder since I told her something like that.

„I'm sorry Ariana"

„Jordyn"

...

I decided to post two chaps today :! But this is a little shorter than usual. Didn't proofread :€