He turned almost glaring. "What do you want from me now Hayley?"

"Come in." I hopped back down the steps to were he was standing. "I'm sorry, I know what you want. But its not a choice Joel, it's him, its always been him ever since we met I new there was something." I needed him to understand it, the way I felt for Aelfric.

He stood waiting with frowning eyebrows but a blank face.

"You know how when your young, you spend a lot of time playing and not much time thinking? But how they both are the same thing? You play about what you dream about. And what I dreamed about was meeting that one person. You know? Love at first sight."

He just continued watching me for a long moment, chewing absently on his lip. "No, I don't know."

"Well then your childhood must have been-" I was about to swear but I held myself back.

Anger seethed just beneath the surface just waiting to come out in a torrent of vulgar words. I had nothing more to say to him.

I swung around on my foot and ran back up the steps. "Hales I-" He called after me but I slammed the door on his words.

Gannon and Godwine were stood by the foot of the stairs watching me warily.

"Everything ok?"

I sniffed back the tears, smiled and nodded. Aelfric was in the kitchen making breakfast. Or at least trying to.

"Problems with Joel?"

If I talked about it I knew I would cry so I just nodded. He had his back to me, but turned at the lack of my response.

"Talk to me." He half smiled coming to pull me into his arms.

I hid my face in the warmth of his chest. "I was trying to explain, but he wouldn't listen." My voice was muffled by his shirt but he seemed to hear me.

"Let him calm down, he probably feels hurt."

"I didn't mean to hurt him." I moaned and the first of the wrenching sobs came.

"Don't cry Hayley," He smoothed circles over my spine, holding me closer. "I know you didn't mean to. This isn't your fault."

Most of the noises I was making didn't make sense any more. "It is. I kissed him back."

"You weren't thinking, everyone makes mistakes. Your a human and tangled mess of heightened emotions."

"Why is everything so complicated." I sniffed.

"Nobody said it would be easy, dear one."

"No one said it would hard either! No one said anything!" I wailed.

He chuckled. "Wasn't he calling for you before?"

"But now I've slammed the door in his face!" I pulled back from him slightly to look at his face. Mine was hot and no doubt red and blotchy but I didn't care. His face was as perfect as it always was but marred slightly by a soft frown of concern.

"Call him." He whispered. "And I will make dinner."

I nodded and wiped at my eyes with the sleeve of my dress. He probably shouldn't try cooking, but I was to upset and tired to protest. I found him a recipe and the instructions for the oven before sitting down with the phone. He would probably need an encyclopedia to find all the utensils and ingredients though.

The phone was slippery in my hands and the buttons seemed stiff but eventually I succeeded in punching in the number. My hands were shaking and I hadn't yet stopped crying. I rubbed a cold hand over my face and tried to pull myself together as it wrung.

"Hello?" It was his dad that answered.

"Hey, is Joel in?" I asked my voice wavered.

"He just got in. Is everything ok, Hayley? You sound upset." He was a good man, like his son. Overly concerned about everything though.

"Yeah, I just really need to talk to Joel." I mumbled.

There was a rustling noise at the other end of the line and some strange rhythmic thumping sounds. "Well, here you go." IT sounded like he was smiling. I thanked him just before I heard a muffled voice in the background.

"Who is it?"

"Hayley."

I heard it as Joel took the phone. "I don't want to talk to you. Just leave me alone." And then he hung up.

I would have begged, cried and screamed had I not heard that click.

The force of the pain of loosing him took me by surprise. It was like everything had been knocked out of me. Not just the air, but something more. And it had been replaced with something that made me heavy but weak. The tears were flowing so heavily I couldn't see.

Aelfric pulled me into his arms. He didn't bother with words, he knew they wouldn't help. Not now. He just let me cry. Whatever food he had begun cooking began to burn, but he didn't move from my side. I buried my face in his chest. I deserved to be burnt alive.

For the pain I had caused. For what I had done. I wanted Joel around, I needed him. But as a brother. Never anything more than a friend.

He pulled me into his arms further, cradling me.

Everything was phasing out and away. The heat of the kitchen, the smell, everything except those words.

I don't want to talk to you. Just leave me alone.

They echoed over and over.

I don't want to talk to you. Just leave me alone.

I wanted to scream, but my chest was filled with a tonne weight and breathing was hard enough already.

"No, not now Gannon. Just not now." He murmured to his brother.

I heard a door slam and other noises as they removed the food.

He didn't bother asking he just stood up with me in the cradle of his arms and carried me to my room. He sat on the bed with my still held in his arms and he let me cry myself out. It took decades, centuries and millennia but he waited. Waited for me.

Finally he spoke. "He didn't mean that. He would never mean that." And then he kissed me.

It was only when i flet a hot drop fall onto my face that i realised that he was crying. Aelfric was crying.

I stopped. Took in a long breathe and sat up as straight as i could in his arms. "No." I mumbled. "Why are you crying?"

He smiled just slightly but said nothing.

I shook my head and rubbed my hand across my eyes. "I am not worth crying over."

"Then Joel certainly isnt." Aelfric chuckled.

It was comfortable in his arms. I kissed his jaw like i had done the day before. "You need food."

"We're fine."

"If you try cooking you'll burn my house down. Let me make something. It will take my mind off of this."

He smiled. "No more crying?"

"Joel is a brother, and brothers and sisters fight don't they?"

He nodded and smiled. "Ok then."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So there we are Joel will be gone for a loooooooooong while

Thankyou again, i promise i do mean it.

Thankyou wombatty x

My Midnight BoyOù les histoires vivent. Découvrez maintenant