Forever My Person

60. Lunch with an Apology

The young woman snaps out of it suddenly. The skin on her face becomes flushed. She turns towards my mother to apologize and takes the empty glass then back to me.

"I'm sorry for that, what can I get for you?"

"I'll take a glass of lemon water please." I order. She swiftly turns around and walks off.

" A lot of women can't get enough of you. I see the way they all stared when you walked in. I'm just happy you're not after that kind of attention and have settled down. I never liked those fake,needy type of women. Disgusting."

I can't help but cough into my napkin. This is not what I want to talk about with my mom. I could careless about those women.

I clear my throat trying to process what she said. "Well good thing I have a woman that's nothing like that."

After how she was with Ev yesterday I know she knows Ev is nothing like them.

The waitress walks up to our table placing the iced lemon water on my side of the table and a full glass of wine on my mom's side. I do notice this time her shirt is buttoned up just a little bit higher then what she had before. It's better but still pushing it. I give her a thanks as my mom starts to order her lunch. I quickly skim through the menu deciding on a pasta bowl.

I give my order to the woman after my mom decides on her's before she leaves again. My stomach is turning slightly from the anxiety I have. I just need to get it over with and talk to my mom about my plans. I don't have that much time till the party.

"Cohen, I know we're not incredibly close but I can tell there's something on your mind. You never have called me to have lunch or anything before, I'm grateful but tell me what's going on." She sips on her wine waiting for my confession.

I wipe my hand along my jaw noting I need to shave soon. Just talk about and get it over with I tell myself. The worse she can say is no and as much as I will hate it I know she has the right to say no. We're not close and nor does she owe me anything even if I'm her son and the past we have.

I take a deep breath in and look at back at my mom. " I don't want to get into the past. We both are adults and we both know why I haven't been in contact. No matter what has happened through out the years I still do care for you mom."

By the look on her pale face I can't tell if she's hurt or shocked. I never really have expressed any kind of feelings towards my parents. I've learned over the years that I'll either end up angry or not even listened to or told I'm ungrateful. I've learned to stay clear from it altogether.

As she tries to figure out what to say our lunch is served with another round of drinks. My stomach grumbles at the mouth watering pasta  and garlic bread. It's definitely more appealing then the salad sitting in front of my mom.

I decide to dig into my dish avoiding eye contact. A few bites in I see she hasn't touched any of her silverware or food.

"Mom."
"Mom" I repeat.

Her eyes flutter over to mine. "Sorry." She whispers looking immediately down at her plate in deep thought.

"You know looking back on all these years I have felt accomplished. Your father and I have created a lavish life together. The places I've been and the things I have seen and enjoyed are what I've always imagined but never thought I could have in this lifetime. I was also able to give you and your brother everything that I didn't have growing up." She says looking around the restaurant.

I can feel the heat creeping up inside of me. How dare she say she gave me and Liam everything. What we needed was parents and they threw money and toys at us so they could enjoy the finer things in life.