disposition. | jack gilinsky

| Chapter 16 |

There was a cold draft that day making it less than fun to walk home barefoot and in loose shorts. My arms stayed folded. I couldn't tell if I was shivering from the cold or trembling from the hurricane swirling inside of me. How could he do this? Who fights so hard to get someone and already has a girlfriend? Sadly this isn't the first time this happened to me. I was just so sure that I would never let it happen again. At least with the last guy, there were signs he had a girlfriend on the side. With Jack, there were no signs at all. And to think I was about to make it official with him. So technically, we didn't 'break up' or anything.

I heard a car horn behind me and turned to see it was Skate. The booming music was muffled until he rolled the window down. He lowered the volume.

"Imogen! You good yo?"

I took a deep breath and got into the car, barely saying a word. As we drove, Skate kept glancing over at me, eventually looking at my feet.

"Where are your shoes?...Are you gonna say something?"

"Just had a crazy night, that's all," I finally spoke.

"Wanna talk about it?"

I couldn't hold it in any longer. I began to break down and shook my head. "I just wanna go home."

"Hey, hey, don't cry. I'm taking you home," he said in a soft voice.

"I mean Los Angeles, five years ago when my parents were still together. Christmas was Christmas, Thanksgiving was Thanksgiving, and my birthday was my birthday. That's home. And I can't ever go back." My voice was broken, my heart was broken; I didn't even want drugs or a drink, I just wanted my bed.

After Skate dropped me home, I expected to sneak up to my room and not have to talk to anyone. But just my luck, there was my Aunt, relaxing on the couch, reading one of her dirty romance novels.

"Well hello, Belle of the Ball. How was the dance?"

I paused for a moment. "It was magical," I answered with a cracked voice.

"Did you party after? And where's your dress?"

"Aunt Sophia, I'll answer all of your questions, I promise. I just need to lie down. I'm...super tired."

"You weren't drinking were you? No smoking? You know the rules," she said, sitting up on the couch.

"Trust me, this is one of those times I wish I weren't sober. Sorry to say."

I didn't give her time to respond. I rushed upstairs and shut the door. And I swear for the remainder of my Saturday and all day Sunday, I barely left the bed. I barely ate and mostly slept. I would wake up in the middle of the night and check to see all of my missed calls and texts from Jack. I ended up just turning my phone off. I was a zombie, only I didn't recognize my hunger.

Sunday night, Cousin Jack had knocked on my door. It wasn't locked so he opened the door slowly.

"Imogen?" He asked softly. I just laid idle in the bed, staring at the window. "We're having your favorite for dinner. Pizza... You have to eat something."

I simply lifted the bag of Gingersnap cookies that was next to me. He sighed and closed the door.

On Monday, I was well-rested for one thing. But I still felt incomplete. I ignored Jack whenever I saw him, despite his efforts. And during group, I wouldn't let him sit next to me. He stared at me the entire time and I could tell Manon noticed something was wrong between us.

"Any stories to share, Imogen?" She asked me.

"Nope," I replied.

"It's okay to open up t-"