HSL: Highschool Life

1:3 Love Theorist

"True Love needs GOD's Perfect Time and The Perfect Chains of Events; Lumayo ka man, umiwas ka man sayo pa rin babagsak ang lalakeng para sayo"

Ako na ang magsasabi sa inyo. Love—I mean True Love is not that simple. Its very complicated that it needs perfection... yung mga napapanood natin sa TV doesn't even compare with the perfection that I am talking about.

Theory #8: Love is like the Rube Golberg Machine—yung tipong madaming pasikot-sikot. Ginagawang complicated ang lahat, pero napakasimple lang naman ng end result. Simple lang siya, pero kailangang eksakto ang lahat para gumana ng maayos.

Theory #27: Love itself is not complicated. Tayo ang nagpapa-complicate ng Love because of our imperfection as human beings. Kaya as much as possible ay subukan nating i-eliminate ang mga bagay na nagpapa-imperfect satin.

Theory #35: Hindi natin malalaman na totoo ang love na nararamdaman natin hanggat hindi pa natin yun nae-experience.

Ito ang laman ng Notebook of 35 Love Theories ko na binigay pa sakin ng Tita ko bago ako mag High School. Ang sabi niya sakin kapag naranasan at naramdaman ko na ang bawat Theory sa Notebook na 'to ay siguradong malalaman ko kung ano nga ba ang True Love. I hope she's right dahil balak kong maging isang Love Guru in the future kaya habang maaga ay i-practice ko na diba?

 "Antonio, Everette."

"Present po!"

It has been 7 class days since I came back to this school, pero hindi ko pa rin makalimutan ang mga nangyari saakin noong first day.

I was traumatized.

I never felt so embarrassed and scared.

I never felt so defenseless.

For one week, I had to skip school. I have never told my Papa and Mama about this dahil alam ko namang wala silang pakialam sa akin. Puro na lang si Ate na lang ang magaling at perfect at si Bunso na lang ang cute at nakakapang-gigil.

Dahil ikaw ang pangalawa sa tatlong magkakapatid, hindi mo alam kung saan mo ilulugar ang sarili mo. You are always the second best to your Ate, and the second best to your Younger Brother. Kaya ang effect, echapwera ka sa bahay kahit gaano mo piliting maging cute mas cute pa rin si Bunso, at kahit gaano mo piliting maging mature mas mature pa rin si Ate. Ang pinaka-masakit, dahil gitna ka, ikaw ang dakilang utusan ng lahat, so even if I am going through this trauma, I had to face it on my own—The Middle Child Syndrome.

When I ran away that day, I went straight to the Registrar's Office and talked to Ms. Susan. I told her that I wanted to change my section from Section Courage to either Section Bravery or Boldness, pero she told me na matutulungan pa lang niya ako after lunch time kaya kailangan ko pang maghintay hanggang lunch.

I felt really hopeless and I didn't know what to do at that moment, so I tried looking for a place to wait. It took a while, pero I saw a good spot sa likod ng locker area. May maliit na garden na parang ginawa ng tambakan ng mga lumang upuan ng school. It was a little dirty, pero tingin ko safe ako sa mga mapanghusgang mata ng tao.

Nang medyo kalmado na ako ay umupo na ako at nilabas ang voice recorder ko para magiwan ng diary entry sa via voice record.

"June 5, 2000. First day of school. I never felt so embarrassed and traumatized. Pinagtawanan nila ako, binully nila ako... at ngayon ay mapipilitan pa akong magpalit ng section. Lahat ng yun ay dahil kay kwe—kwer—dahil sa Kwek-kwek na yun. Ngiti-ngiti pa siya, hindi ba niya nakita na hiyang-hiya ako sa mga dapat na magiging classmates ko?—ngayong mas naisip ko na ang mga nangyari—I hate him! I really hate him! I hate you kwek-kwek student! I—"