Just me, Lydia.

Voices

I guess I fell asleep after Stiles dropped me off. Because I wake up, screaming. I check the alarm clock, and the date is the same. My nap was 30 minutes long, but felt like a lifetime. People die in my mind. I can't stop hearing things. Maybe I'm more powerful than I think. I text Stiles.

-I might not go to Scott's party tonight.-
-why not?-
-I just haven't been feeling okay.-
-do you want me to come over?-
-well, you're going to the party, right?-
-yea.-
-okay. I'll go. Just....promise to stay by me?-
-I promise.-
-:)thanks-
-see you at 8:30-
-Kay-

I plop my phone down and think. Thinking is my best sport. Allison's face pops into my mind for some reason. Her dimples, her smile, her eyes. Her dad had just taken Isaac under his wing and he's staying at Mr. Argent's house. Isaac and Malia might be together. I wasn't sure.

At 8:28, Stiles shows up and I get into his car. "Hey." I smile.

"Hi, Lyds." We get to the party a little early and Stiles and I talk the whole way there about college. Scott runs out to us. "Hey, Scott." Stiles and Scott exchange a smile and they do a little handshake sort of thing. Super goofy too. I laugh a little and we walk into the house. Kira greets me with a hug.

"Boo, I missed you so much!" I rolled my eyes.

"You just say me today." She laughs a little and shrugs. All four of us walk into the kitchen and I see her.

I grab Stiles' hand tight and he looks at me confused. I gesture to the left with my eyes. He looks and his mouth parts open when he sees it too. Something was in his eyes then. I couldn't tell what it was. Maybe anger, maybe frustration, definitely agony.

I look at him and sigh. "Let's leave, Stiles." He shakes his head a little.

"Malia. Malia!" He catches her attention and her eyes meet his. Her and Isaac were talking and a spark lit inside of her. "It's me, Stiles."

I look at Scott. His jaw is dropped. He mouths "I didn't know she was here. I'm sorry." I tug on Stiles arm.

"Let's go."

"Malia...why did you leave?" Silence. "CMON. We know that Donkey Kong didn't come and kick you out of town. So that's one answer that's out of the question." Malia just stares at him.

I tug at him again. "Stiles...let's go."

Malia switches her glare to me. Her eyes widen. "You...you've moved on, Stiles."

Stiles looks at me. "What? Lydia? Nooooooo."

Time stops. He didn't feel the same. He wanted Malia back. He didn't want me. It was all a lie. The act that he might have feelings for me. And it sucked. I felt like a samurai sword impaled my heart. And the feeling lingered. Just like it did with Jackson. Just like it did with Aiden. My heart was broken once again. Their conversation continues. But all I can hear is my heart beating in my head. Voices scream at me. I want to cover my ears. But it wouldn't help. I can't scream.

I run out of Scott's house. People know better than to follow me. It gets on my nerves. I sit on the sidewalk. Trying desperately not to cry. Why did I care so much about Stiles Stilinski? But there is one person that doesn't care if following me gets on my nerves. And he was soon approaching. "It's been a long time, huh?" He sits beside me.

"Shut up, Derek. I want to be alone."

He sighs. "Mhm. That's what I always say. It doesn't help, Lydia."

This is making things so much worse. "Derek. Please leave me alone." He shakes his head. "You don't know what I'm feeling right now."

"You know, I didn't think you would have feelings for such a hyperactive spaz like Stiles."

"How do you know I have feelings for him?"

He looks at me and I stare back at him. "Your heart beat. It quickens every time you see him." I blush a little and turn away. "He likes you, too."

"Maybe his heart beats quickens because he's nervous right now, okay?" Derek laughs a little.

"I know him better than that. He's liked you for a long time." I shake my head.

"Does his heart beat quicken when he sees Malia?"

Derek nods. "But not nearly as much as it does for you." I look at him and bite my lip.

"Really?"

"Mhm." I hug him and he just stays straight up, not hugging me back.

"Thank you so damn much."

He laughs a little. "You're so damn welcome." I squeeze him a little tighter and walk into the party again, feeling better than ever.

"Stiles! Stiles, where are you?" I walk into the kitchen again. Scott covers my eyes. "What is it?"

"You don't want to see this."