Why can’t guys take a fucking message? It was simple I told him to leave me alone yet he found it utterly impossible. He is so hung up on the fact Zac will steal me and I’ll let him. Who does he think I am? I thought he knew me, I thought he knew me better than I know myself, I thought I could trust him. Well I was wrong. I’ve had it with him. Thinking he was different was the worst mistake I made. For all I care he can punch the living day lights out of Zac and he can end up in prison.
My phone buzzed on my dressing table. “Oh for fuck sake Liam give up!” I said aloud forgetting my dad was in the living room. “Shit, shit, shit. Please don’t...please don’t...” I whispered, my hand over my eyes as if that would help.
“Zooey what the fuck have I been telling you about swearing? I hate the fucking words and a mess up like you doesn’t need to use them. And turn that god damn phone off I’m sick fed up listening to it buzzing every two fucking seconds. Who the hell is it anyway you clearly are too messed up to have any friends?!”
“It’s the battery. It’s running low.” I lied. I’ve heard that line so many times before I’ve become resistant to his insults. It wasn’t Liam though. It was Raya.
“Hey chick. Hope ur ok. No one has heard frm u in a bit an jst wntd to chck up. Luv Rx.” I felt so bad at first as I have literally just fell off the edge of the Earth to them all. After the fight I couldn’t help but go back to the invisible Zooey I always have been. My dad is none the wiser though. As he said, I’m too messed up to have friends anyway.
Instead of going to school I’ve been spending my days drawing or messing up since it’s the only two things I can do. Each day I’m finding different little spots just outside of town and drawing the view of the town from them. My way of showing how much I don’t fit in by drawing myself on the outside of society.
*****
It’s been 5 weeks now since I last saw Liam and Raya. I hadn’t replied to their texts and as the days passed by fewer came through. I still got the usual one from Liam every day though “Zo plz. Jst let me know ur ok. I’m sry an I’m gonna keep tryin till u tlk 2 me. Liam xxx”. I was sick fed up getting it every day and it got to the stage I didn’t bother charging my phone as clearly no one cared about me enough to bother to see me in person. Why would they?
*****
“I’m fucking sick fed up with you Zooey Banks. All I do in life is look after you. You are such a burden to me. I wish I had never met your mother and fucked her. She wasn’t even that good looking. It shows on you really. I mean look at yourself. You’re fat, ugly and you can’t even make friends. How fucked up are you?” My so called father spat out at me. I’d had enough this time though.
As he continued the years of anger that had built up inside of me began to boil until it was too much to deal with. “How dare you treat me like this!” I spat back at him regretting it the second I did. He charged towards me pushing my chest sending me flying to the wall banging my head off the frame of a painting. Clamping my hand to my head to ease the pain I screamed in horror. “You don’t deserve anything you have” I continued as his heavy boot heaved towards my stomach, crashing hard sending a stifling pain through my whole body. I couldn’t give in now. I had started this and I had to continue. “You call yourself a father?” I managed to squeeze out in one short breath. “Think you deserve to be alive when mum isn’t?” I said crumpled in a ball like a little girl wishing so hard that my dad had died and not my mum.
“Don’t you fucking start me Zooey. I’ll show you what I deserve. A hell of a better daughter than I have.” I could see him getting angrier by the second. “A daughter who looks after their father and doesn’t spend her day wasting time making stupid drawing a 4 year old could do.” He spat in my face, his foot slamming hard into my stomach again. As he began to walk away I attempted to get up ignoring the pain. He shot me down with a swing of a bottle hitting my head sending me flying back to the ground.
*****
“In the arms of the angel, fly away from here, from this dark, cold bedroom, and the endlessness that you fear. You are pulled from the wreckage, of your silent reverie. You're in the arms of the angel, may you find some comfort here. Sleep tight baby girl.” I heard drifting off to sleep as a kiss was placed on my forehead. The smell of my mum’s perfume lingering in the room as I slowly fell unconscious. Hugging my bear tightly dreaming of cotton candy and drawing spending the day drawing picture with my new crayons.
*****
I woke up to the sound of the TV blaring in the living room. I slowly opened my eyes the light too bright. As I sat up the pain reminded me of what had happened. I quietly whimpered scanning the room for my dad. Crawling to my room I knew what I had to do – leave.
I locked the door, grabbed some clothes and shoved them into my bag making sure not to crumble my drawings. Hearing a noise outside the door I swung round hitting a vase full of flower on the way sending it smashing to the ground.
“Zooey?!” I heard a roar from the living room.
Shit.
I quickly moved to the window opening it as the banging began on the door since it wouldn’t open.
“Open the fucking door Zooey or I’ll barge my fucking way in there and you won’t even be able to tell anyone how much is fucking hurts!”
Chucking my bag out the window I jumped after it holding back the scream of pain from last nights fight. Then the adrenaline kicked in.
I slung my bag over my shoulder and ran because my life expected on it. The street was empty as it was the middle of the day. Everyone was at work which was in my favour as that way no one could track me. No one would have even seen where I went.
I ran until it got dark heading any the only direction I knew. Morre.
ČTEŠ
Broken and Bruised
RomanceZooey grew up in a life of abuse. Her mother died when she was very young and her father didn't take it very well. Moving school often she never thought she could be able to make a connection. Then she was reunited with Liam. Liam grew up in a conv...
