Broken and Bruised

Chapter 22 - How Guys Think

Zooey's POV

“My Paul used to be like that but I trained him well.  Honestly guys are like dogs.  If you want them to be good boyfriends then you need to train them to be good boyfriends.”  Raya said to me as we sat in the art resource room partly because I didn’t want Liam or anyone else for that matter to see me.  I was kind of embarrassed at the way I spoke to him.  It was my best, secret hiding spot until she found me.  To be honest I’m quite glad she had.  Having never been through this it was quite good to have someone to talk to it about who had. 

“How did you do that?”  I replied hoping she could enlighten me into how guys think.

“By rewarding good behaviour.”  Raya said sounding very serious with a sadistic smile on her face as I laughed thinking of Liam on his knees begging for a biscuit like a cute little puppy.  How can I be annoyed at him yet still find him so cute?  I was feeling kinda annoyed at the way I treated him now I had had the chance to calm down.

“But I don’t want him to change.” 

“So you want him to be controlling and overprotective?”  Raya reminded me again of his immature actions.

“No of course not but that’s not what he’s normally like.  You’ve seen some of the texts – he’s so sweet.”  I said reminded Raya of the cute texts I get from him.  Those ones where you find yourself beaming and in a world of your own.

“Yeah he’s such a cutie.  Paul hardly ever says things like that to me anymore.  It’s usually only if we haven’t seen each other in ages.”  Raya responded pulling a pouty face.

“I’ll drop him some hints.”  I joked with her.

“Yeah you do that.”  She said rummaging through her make-up bag.  “It’s just so thick.  So what are you going to do about lover-boy?”

“I don’t know.  I don’t think we are good together.”  I said knowing it was a lie.  I felt so safe, so happy with him.  There was no way we were bad together.

“Yeah you’re not, you are bloody perfect for each other.”  She said as I tried my hardest not to let the smile turning my head just in case.

“You really think so?”  I asked for reassuring myself.  “We are just so different and we fight all the time.”  I gave as an excuse.

“I know so.  You are similar in the things that matter and fighting just means you care.  Me and Paul have been together for just over two years now and we are always arguing.”  

Feeling guilty after my chat with Raya I decided I should probably apologise to Liam.  I had one more class until lunch so I was just going to walk up to him and apologise.  Just strut in that canteen, walk right up to him look him in the eyes and say ‘I’m sorry’.  Who was I kidding?  There was no way I would be able to do that.  I sat with my heart pounding the whole way through the class.  Shaking my leg and tapping my pen on the table creating a tune in my head to go along with the beat.  My mind jumping from ‘Yes Zooey, you can do it’ to ‘Zooey, c’mon there is no way you will be able to’. 

“Zooey!”  Mr Campbell shouted making me jump.

“Hmmm”  I said scanning round the room to find where the voice came from.

“Will you please stop tapping that damn pencil and give me an answer to the question I asked!”  he demanded.

“Sorry Sir.”  I replied carefully placing my pen on the table and a hand on my leg to stop it too. 

“And the answer?”

“I...I didn’t hear the question Sir.”  I confessed.

“Well isn’t that a coincidence.” He said sarcastically.  “What is an ionic bond?”

“Ermmm.  Its and ermmmm... the electrostatic attraction between a positive and a negative ion?”  I said making it sound more like a question than an answer.

“Correct Miss Banks.  Now let’s just try to pay attention next time so I don’t have to ask the question again.”

The bell rang and everyone began to flood out the room.  Slowly tidying my stuff up I pushed my way through the crowd towards my locker.  My heart still pounding away.  Dumping my stuff and grabbing my lunch I headed for the canteen.  I would just go in there and tell him I said to myself as I confidently strutted through the now empty corridor. 

I went straight to where I usually sit - between Liam and Paul.  Growing closer to the seat my body unconsciously veered away from it.

“Zooey!”  I heard Raya shout.  “Come sit.”  She sneered at me not giving me much of a choice.  I walked towards her plastering a fake smile on my face.  Sitting down next to Liam he moved slightly away not making eye contact with me, turning to talk to a guy I didn’t recognise at the table.  Going with the flow I sat quietly and began eating my lunch.  Was he really that annoyed at me?  I mean yeah I did act pretty selfish and immature but surely he knew I didn’t mean what I said.  Typically lunch dragged by.  What made it worse was Liam had a bit of tomato sauce on the edge of his lip from his usual burger and chips for lunch which was annoying me.  Giving up I bent forward and lightly placed my finger on it, removing it and startling him.  I quickly licked it off my finger.

“Sorry.”  I said really apologising for what I had done rather than for startling him.  He gave me a shocked look.  Begging him through my eyes to understand what I was apologising for, his expression changed.  He became calmer, more inviting.  I had him back.

Lunch went by too quickly after that.  We just sat in silence, playing with each other’s hands under the table.  Smiles spread across our faces.  Taking a second to look away from him I looked at Raya who was smiling that ‘you got the boy’ smile. 

We returned to our usual lovey-dovey life.  He picked me up from each class and dropped me off at my next.  He walked me home each night, dropping me at my door.  I liked this boy too much to care what my dad thought.  If he truly wanted me to be happy then he would have to deal with it. 

This lasted about a week.  Then Zac decided he fancied another go at Liam.