Love The Way You Lie

10: YOU HAD A LIFE

"In Seattle," you emphasize. You're actually not sure why you emphasized the location.

Duh. You're in Seattle. Why the hell are you rambling?

Because Meredith is STILL FUCKING HERE. What the fuck is her problem? Your problem?

Your problems? Your problem? Your co-dependent-co-Derek?

No. Just her problems and your problems. Not together problems. Just stupid Derek.

"She seems... Sweet..." You say as you roll your eyes to the ceiling.

You know that Meredith can hear you say all of this.

You're looking up and praying to high heavens she doesn't catch on to the crack in your voice.

You can't talk about her to him. You can't. It just doesn't work that way.

You like her already. You hope she doesn't like you. She needs to stay the fuck away from both of you because you know you'll just bring bad news.

"The ice you're on? It's thinner!" Derek whispers at you, too low for his whatever to hear.

"She's YOUNG," you say, as if you want to say 'she's too damn young for you, Derek," but you can't say that all before he walks away.

"That whole 'ooh he's a brain surgeon thing', happening," you keep snarking as you turn around and you try to face him.

He turns around, too, so he can keep listening.

He's showing he's listening for Meredith's benefit. You know it because he's never turned around just for you. Not even the day that he met you...

"But still sweet, which is what you were going for, right? The anti-Addison?" You realize you're complimenting your husband's girlfriend/mistress to your husband while staring at her over his shoulder and you should probably be kicked off paradise just for that fact alone.

But then again, you were out of that dream long ago, and you definitely are now.

"If you came out here to try to win me back you can forget about it," Derek stands strong and puffs his chest out.

Stay strong, Addison. Stay strong. For the other girl please stay strong...

You take step over step over step towards him (and her...) as you keep on talking...

"I did, I flew all the way across the country, to reminisce over wedding photos, get drunk, fall into bed and make you realize you can't fall into bed without me..." You say in a low one that probably seduced him at some point.

Maybe that voice only seduces Mark Sloan, you groan internally at the thought.

He doesn't blink and you know he's calling your bluff.

"Relax, Derek, I'm here for work," you affirm, and you know this probably impresses him seeing as you've been fucking homeless and unemployed for many months.

"I'm helping with the TTTS you've admitted last week-" you can't meet his gaze as you say this part because you're thinking of the Adele Webber-Richard Webber-SomeOtherWoman love triangle and how you know all sides of it and you wonder how much Derek knows about that...

"And from Richard's briefing-" You start, but Derek cuts you off right again.

"RICHARD KNEW YOU WERE COMING OUT HERE?!" Derek practically shouts at you.

"HE ASKED ME TO COME, DIDN'T HE TELL YOU?," You half-life and half tell the truth because you're not going to say that you begged for it.

"NO HE DIDN'T" Derek shout-whispers, then lowers his voice to a hush.