𝙼𝚢 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚣𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗

Past

I cried again because my mother told me we can't go back to the past. I don't know why, but I cried, it was weird. I told my parents what I was crying about and now they think I should go to a hospital. They think I need a different medicine. I found a show called The OA it's on Netflix. It's about this girl who has many past lives. I haven't learned much about it because I'm only on the second episode. They are very long episodes. I've often looked around and say to myself "where am I" "I'm not supposed to be here". Which was weird, I think I'm starting to find I out my past life. I tried hypnosis but I think it might have just been fantasy. There was also a lot of ads in it and I got distracted. I think I'm really awakening because I'd never cry when someone says something about the past. I might be becoming more sensitive to the reminders of my past life. I told my friend Natalie that when they make time machines I'm gonna buy one and go to the 80s then break it and stay there forever. But she told me that it will alter the future, which I didn't want to happen. If only we can go back for a few months without time being altered. She said the safest way is dreams and spells, also meditation. I don't like how my parents respond to my decisions. They are supportive in the beginning but when a family meme we says something about it they make fun of it. It's really annoying and it hurts because I can't really do anything without them at the moment. I NEED to get to that agency I can't wait to go, I'll finally do something about my life and get it under control. My mother says I have bipolar disorder, but I don't disagree with that.

    Edit: 6/3/2020: I need to get out of here the walls are closing in on me. I'm so tired of staying inside, not getting to live my life. I want this to end, I need to go out and act and make money. I need to change the world. I'm going to finish up my shots for the agency we will be going to. I can't sit in this prison any longer.