A Day In September - BTS Zombie au

14: Admitting Failure

He got what he wanted, Mara admitted to herself.

"You know, the only reason you're alive is because I didn't have the heart to leave you out there, hurt and trapped by those things. It could've been too late for you too but I still tried," Mara said, disconsolate.

"My injury was manageable. I could recover, and I did. I can't be bothered to save someone who was already practically dead," he said, only ticking her off even more.

Mara was beginning to ask herself if Jimin was someone who wouldn't risk his life for anyone, putting himself first in every situation even if it called for selflessness. The sense of entitlement for the privilege to live was oozing from him, and Mara could do nothing except burst his bubble and make him crash back down to earth.

"You can't be-...So I can have mercy on you, but you won't have mercy on him because you can't 'be bothered'? What? Just 'cause youre upset that your friends left you to die that means you have to follow their example?" Mara chuckled humorlessly, watching Jimin's stare harden.

He clenched his jaw, "Shut up."

"Now I know where you learned it from," Mara nodded to herself with a huff, heading to where she'd originally planned. Jimin watched her go with his glare glued to the back of her head and the doorway she exited through as she rounded the corner. He allowed her to walk away without another word. Mara felt a twinge of guilt for throwing it all back in his face. She wouldn't back away from holding people accountable for their mistakes, but she couldn't help feel regret.

Maybe I went too far, the girl thought.

Mara was gathering her blankets and belongings in their safe room when Jimin walked in. He still seemed upset as he watched her. Despite the tension, he questioned her quietly.

"Where are you going?" He muttered.

Mara shrugged, "Next door."

She was aware of the dangers of splitting up, but she figured that space to themselves would benefit them both. Perhaps the next day they'd approach this will leveled heads. Besides, Mara was confident Jimin could handle himself, and she sure as hell could handle herself, so why should she stay in the same room as him?

She could have made the call. It was a collective decision, and Mara asked herself over and over why she allowed Jimin to have the final say.

"He was far too gone. He could put us in danger!"

Mara heard his words echo in her head as she walked down just a few feet to the next room, barricading herself inside and not setting up until she was sure the barricade was sturdy.

What is done, is done.

She could do nothing but sleep—or at least hope that she could sleep with what was wrapped like thorns around her conscience.

Jimin was as wide awake as she was, his eyelids closing but his eyes still shifting around uneasily under their curtains. He sighed, turning over to his side and staring blankly at the empty space beside him. The solar path light lit the room with a blue tinged hue as if sensitive to her absence.

Both eventually fell asleep, the night that beckoned them into sleep too tempting to ignore.

The morning after was painfully awkward. Mara had woken up early—the sun had just begun to rise—and the drained look in her eyes was telling of what kind of sleep she'd gotten. She couldn't say she had an all-nighter, nor could she say she had a pleasant sleep.

All in all, she felt burdened.

The girl stared at the wall, wishing she could've instead kicked Jimin out instead of giving him the room with the window. She was hoping to placate the pessimistic thoughts in her head with the view of the sky and a magnificent sun, but she was granted neither. Instead, she was left in a dingy, dark and dusty room with only the light from the hallway filtering through the sliver under the door. Her solar path light wasn't so bright either, so any semblance of warmth was disappointingly superficial.