Shadows of the Past

Chapter 9

"He would if he were here!" retorted Harley. "And Mr. J would never cross the line by actually killing me. He loves me."

"Oh, when are you going to wake up, Harley?" demanded Ivy. "Even if you get J back, he's going to treat you as horribly as he's always treated you! You can't love a man who would hurt you on a whim, and you can't love a man who has so many personalities that he doesn't even know who he really is! If he doesn't even know, what chance have you got to really know him, and how can you love someone you don't even know?! You're wasting your life on a man so unstable that he doesn't even have a stable backstory, a man who is completely random and crazy and changeable! How do you know that one day he won't find you amusing anymore, and just decide to put you out of your misery?!"

"I'll tell you how I know!" shrieked Harley. "I know because he loves me! He loves me! And I do know who he is – he's my Mr. J! And I know him better than he knows himself, and well enough to know he won't be expecting this!"

She suddenly slammed her elbow back into Joker's solar plexus, knocking the breath from his body. Winded, he gasped and released his hold on Harley, enough for her to duck under his arm which held the knife, turn and face him, and then punch him hard in the face.

"That's for threatening me without meaning it," she snapped. "I ain't in the mood to be teased!"

Joker cupped his bleeding nose and opened his mouth to respond, when Crane suddenly jabbed a syringe into his neck which knocked him unconscious instantly.

"Thank you, Jonathan," said Tetch. "I'm sure he was going to get violent. That's the first and only reaction for a man like that."

"How are you gonna fix his brain if he's knocked out?" asked Harley as she helped Tetch drag him over to the chair and secure him.

"He'll be woken up shortly – it's difficult to remain unconscious when there are needles being stuck into your brain," replied Tetch. "What we have to do is use the machine to apply the same amount of pressure as both your hammer blow and the fall did in the exact same spot they both fell on. Which shouldn't be too hard to find since he's got a wound," he said, nodding at the cut in Joker's skull. "But it's a very delicate and precise operation."

"We also need to make sure it doesn't happen again," said Harley. "Can you insert a metal plate in his skull or something to shield the spot?"

"I'm not really a qualified surgeon, my dear..." began Tetch.

"I'll do it," volunteered Ivy. "I might kill him, but that's a risk we're gonna have to take."

"No, we won't," snapped Harley. She sighed. "Just...fix him first. And then we'll improvise."

"I'll certainly do my best," sighed Tetch, rolling up his sleeves. "Now let's see..."

The machine jolted, and so did Joker, whose green eyes snapped open as the machine began to beep and whir. "Mr. J?" asked Harley, hopefully. "You know who I am?"

"No," he replied. "Where's Jeannie?"

"Ugh, not that one again!" snapped Harley. "I hate this guy! C'mon, Jervis, shock him again."

Tetch obeyed, and Joker's body spasmed again. "Mr. J?" repeated Harley.

"Who's Mr. J?" asked Joker. "I'm known as the Red Hood, the most feared criminal in Gotham. Of course maybe the look could use some work – balancing a giant, red fishbowl over your head isn't the most practical thing in the world..."

"Keep going," interrupted Harley, nodding at Tetch.

He pressed the button again. "Joker?" asked Tetch, as his body stilled.

"Yep, that's me!" he said, cheerfully. "The Joker!"

"Oh, thank God!" exclaimed Harley. "I missed you so much, Mr. J!"

"Who are you?" he asked.

"I'm...your Harley Quinn, puddin'," she stammered. "Your girlfriend."

"Harley Quinn?" he repeated. "I don't know any Harley Quinn. Kinda a good gag, I guess, but frankly for a girlfriend, I think I can do better than you, sweetheart. But let me work on you a bit and see what I can do – I'm an artist, y'know. And maybe someday I can make you as hot as that Vicki Vale reporter – she's a fox. Hope she ain't seeing anyone or I'll have to kill them – never rub another man's rhubarb, that's my motto. Tell me, have you ever danced with the Devil in the pale moonlight?"

"What the hell?" asked Harley. "This ain't my Mr. J! Jervis, shock him again."

Tetch obeyed. "Mr. J, please be you!" exclaimed Harley, as Joker twitched again.

"Well, who is 'me', really?" asked Joker, licking his lips. "I got a lotta different backstories. You wanna know how I got these scars? You should calm down, beautiful – why so serious?"

"Eurgh, no, this one's creepy," said Harley, pressing the button herself this time. "Mr. J, please come back!"

"Harley, is that you?" asked Joker.

"Yes, Mr. J!" cried Harley. "Yes, it is! Your Harley girl's here..."

"Why are you dressed like that?" he interrupted. "Shouldn't you be wearing practically nothing, and covered in tattoos?"

"Erm...no," stammered Harley. "This is...how I always dress, Mr. J. Classic jester costume..."

"It's a bit cartoony, wouldn't you say?" asked Joker. "I think you'd look better with less clothing, and more tattoos. I also have the sudden urge to get a forehead tattoo, with some kinda dark label so everyone knows how gritty and psychopathic I am. Maybe 'deranged.' Or 'disturbed.' No, 'damaged'! Damaged!"

"Oh God, no!" exclaimed Harley, slamming her fist down hard on the button. Unfortunately, in her haste to rid the Joker of that particular personality, she used more force than was necessary, and the button stayed stuck down.

Joker began lurching uncontrollably, babbling snatches of words and catchphrases as the machine began to spark, overloading itself. "You're gonna fry him – turn it off or get him out of there!" shouted Two-Face.

"I can't turn it off – it's stuck!" exclaimed Tetch, who was helplessly pressing buttons.

Two-Face growled, diving forward and reaching for the plug that attached the machine to the wall socket. He ripped it out, and the machine switched off. But it appeared to be too late – the Joker lay still and lifeless, smoke rising off him.

"Oh God, what have I done?" gasped Harley, racing over to him. "I just wanted my Joker back, but I might have lost him forever! I might have killed him! I didn't mean...I...Mr. J, please don't be dead!" she sobbed. "Please! I don't even care which personality you have – I just want you to come back to me! Come back! Oh, Mr. J!"

She burst into tears, hugging his body. The door opened at that moment and Dr. Leland stormed in. "I thought I heard noises coming from in here. What on earth is going on?"

She stared at Harley sobbing over Joker. "What have you done to him?" she asked, quietly.

"We...were trying to fix him," stammered Tetch. "And I'm afraid we've done something...irreparably wrong."

"To Joker?" said Dr. Leland. "He's already had something irreparably wrong done to him. That's how he became the Joker."

"Yes, and two wrongs don't make a right, do they?" asked Tetch, gently. "Harley, I'm so sorry..."

"It's not your fault," she whispered. "It's mine. You warned me it was dangerous, and I didn't listen. I just wanted my Mr. J back so bad...and now he's gone for good."

"Everyone, back to your cells," ordered Dr. Leland. They all shuffled out of the room, except for Harley, who just held Joker.

"Harley..." began Dr. Leland.

"Just leave me with him, Joan," she whispered, tears in her eyes. "Just for a little while. So I can say goodbye. Please."

Dr. Leland sighed heavily. "I'll be back in ten minutes," she muttered, shutting the door.