When I woke up the next day I realized I had overslept since it was already 9:47 in the morning. I checked my phone to see a text from Carla.
New Message: Carla 7:02 AM
Eren, I know it's a school day but when I came to wake you up I saw a bottle on Nyquil on your dresser and figured you were ill so I let you sleep. I may have work until late so be good, if you want you can have a friend or two over. Be safe.
I was glad I kept all those little bottles of stuff for colds and allergies because it made a perfect way to play sick. I used to actually use them to go to sleep, then I got the ability to buy real sleeping pills and alcohol. I went downstairs to grab a diet coke and an apple and retreated to my bed. I slept all the way until 1:45 as I had work at 2:30 and it took 20 minutes to walk there. I got dressed and tried to make myself look decent for someone who did nothing but sleep and left my house around 2. I got to work and punched in. When I went to get the books to stack I saw none were around, the system had been updated and it was a rather slow day.
I walked over to the young adult section to look at random books when I heard a voice appear next to me.
"Hey brat." He whispered into my ear.
I jumped which caused me to drop the book I was holding. I bent and picked it up, placing it on the shelf very ungracefully.
"Hi." I said and looked at Levi.
"So, you weren't at school." He said with a tone that I couldn't quite name, almost like every time he spoke.
"Nope." I said as I leaned against the book shelf.
"Why not?"
"I didn't want to go." I said like it was obvious.
"Oh. Okay." He sounded a little hurt this time.
Yep, he realized that you're such a selfish prick who'd rather sleep than deal with anything that could ever benefit you and your life. Good job, Eren. The voice was back today. I pinched my wrist as it kept going on about how I couldn't do anything right.
"Levi!" We heard a voice, it sounded familiar to me but I couldn't quite place it until he came over. It was his jock friend who had held me as he punched me my first day. "How's it going man? Why are you over with this dweeb?" He looked at me.
"He's not that bad Erwin, I feel kind of bad for what I did to him." Levi said to his friend.
Erwin, I remember a boy named Erwin once, this guy even looked like him. That part of my past is one I'd never touch again though. I looked at him more and it hit me; Armin told me about him. Levi's minion but could-be nice guy. He was the second heartthrob, Levi being the first. Every girl just threw themselves at the two. I stood awkwardly while they spoke about some weird topic that I hadn't cared to listen in on. I realized I was just the background to his main life, the "side-bitch" as it could be called. See, he doesn't even want to include you. You're his second choice. He's just using you to pass time, I don't see why I mean look at you! You're a fucking wreck. The voice was yelling to me.
I slipped away subtly and went to the back. As soon as I shut the door I couldn't breathe, the voice swarming me with its venom and it allowed the images to appear. Somehow I had lost it. I had a razor in my pocket always for emergencies and I tried and tried to talk my way out of it. I stood and paced the small room, pulling at my hair and whimpering out my cries, biting my lip as to not make much sound. I couldn't take it. The voice, the memories, the truths, the lies. It was too much; I threw myself into the corner and pulled out the thin piece of metal. I slipped my sleeve up and let it glide over my wrist. It was only 2 slices but each had a decent depth to it; they weren't worthy of stitches but I needed my gauze, which was in my bag. And that was up in the front desk, I'd have to cross Levi to get to it.
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I will Change (Ereri/Riren)
أدب الهواةEren is a 17 year old junior who has lost his parents and suffers from depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, and self harms. He has begun attending Trost Secondary School, but on his first day he is already beaten up by Levi Ackerman, the heart-throb...
