Holidaystuck- Ten Christmas One-Shots [Homestuck]

One-Shot #6- Callie's Christmas

"Okay Callie, it's time you learned about some of our holiday traditions," Gamzee said, feeling like the all-powerful parent he was. Except he wasn't all-powerful. Or an actual parent. But that's besides the point.

"Okay, papa," Calliope replied, sitting cross-legged on the floor. "What do we learn first?"

"We?" Gamzee said, confused. "Oh, wait, you mean your brother. I all up and forgot about him for a second there." He grinned bashfully. "Cal! C'mere a sec!" Caliborn came down the hallway, grumbling.

"What is it, dad?" he said, a permanent scowl etched on his face.

"Sit down," Gamzee instructed, pointing at the floor next to Calliope. "You two are gonna learn something today. I ain't no parent if I can't teach my children anything." Caliborn sighed in frustration, but sat down nonetheless.

"Okay, so today we're gonna learn about holiday traditions," Gamzee said, pulling out a chalkboard. "At the end of the solar sweep, we all celebrate the 12th Perigee's Eve, when we decorate the hive, and maybe the lusus- me- would bring back a behemoth leaving- which I'm not gonna do, just so you know- and we all celebrate the end of the sweep together."

Caliborn was daydreaming the whole time, but Calliope was astonished at how amazing troll culture could be. In a way, she was a troll too, now that she had learned about the 12th Perigee's Eve. At least, in her mind she was.

The next morning, Calliope came downstairs in her troll cosplay when Caliborn was still lounging around in his pajamas.

"Why the hell are you dressed like that so early?" He asked. "Or, you know. At all."

"I'm celebrating," she replied, turning her nose up. "I'm sorry if you don't want to experience life in other cultures, but I do, and I'm going to." She huffed and went to the kitchen, where Gamzee was making breakfast.

"Papa, Caliborn keeps making fun of my troll cosplay," she said.

"What?" Gamzee replied, shocked. "Well, that's just not right. You know what, Callie? Why don't you up and chill with the other trolls today? You can trust 'em, don't worry. They're my bros."

Calliope smiled. "Thanks, papa!" She said, skipping out the door.

Calliope returned home that evening from a long day out. She sat down at the dinner table, and Gamzee asked her how her day was.

"Oh, it was great!" She exclaimed. "I met these other kind of trolls. They had their horns filed down so short, you can't see them, and they had paler skin too! It looked a little pinkish, to be honest... But, anyways, they told me about other traditions they had, like this one called Christmas, when they get a giant tree, and they put all these pretty lights on it, and then they have presents, and, and they hang socks on the wall!"

"Trolls?" Gamzee pondered. "I don't know no trolls with short horns... Well, except Karbro, at least. But I really don't know any trolls with pink skin... Wait a sec, did some of them have blonde hair?"

Calliope nodded, and Gamzee proceeded to burst out in laughter, shaking the whole table. Caliborn grimaced at his father's unruliness and held his glass of Faygo steady. He hated Faygo, but that was all the old man had, so they were forced to drink it. Of course Calliope liked it. What a suck-up.

"Those 'trolls' you were telling me about, Callie," Gamzee said, still chuckling. "They weren't trolls, they were humans. They have their own holidays. John and Dave musta' been pranking ya."

"Oh," Callie said, her heart sinking. She was really interested in their culture, but it turned out they weren't trolls after all. She didn't know if her dad would let her take part in traditions he didn't practice.

"Don't look so down there, sis," Gamzee said. Calliope looked up hopefully. Her father never called anyone his bro or sis unless he really valued them. "If you really wanna try out these traditions, I'd be obliged to try them out with you. That is, if you'd let me."

Calliope gasped with delight. "Yes, papa, I would love to try them, and I want you to please, pretty please join me!" She said, hugging him. Gamzee chuckled.

"Well, you're the expert," he said, smiling. "What do we do first?"